Posted March 20, 2020 After about 7 decades of life as a fine, upright, handsome example of American manhood I have grown accustomed to female attention and the occasional approach by attractive younger ladies. That is my story, anyway, and I will stick to it. Yesterday, while walking from the store to my car I was approached in the parking lot by a lovely young woman. She wasted no time at all, asking if I might be interested in trading with her, sex for toilet paper. I said "Maybe. What kind of toilet paper do you have?" 8 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 21, 2020 It seems the time for conservatism. Thinking of starting a class entitled "only one square at a time". This would include a lab portion with every class. The class size: one adult (female) 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 21, 2020 i took a tour of Fort Knox and took a picture that I smuggled out.............................................. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 21, 2020 39 minutes ago, Hunter VanDyke said: I’ve heard the living room is nice this time of year! Nice and sunny yet cozy and welcoming. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 21, 2020 1 minute ago, JoDoe27 said: I’ve heard the living room is nice this time of year! Nice and sunny yet cozy and welcoming. Apparently there's a big party happening in the bathroom with a bunch of TP. Strobe lights and good music. It's Saturday, I might headed over there for some fun tonight. 😂 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 21, 2020 5 minutes ago, JoDoe27 said: I’ve heard the living room is nice this time of year! Nice and sunny yet cozy and welcoming. the perfect spot:: 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 21, 2020 12 minutes ago, Hunter VanDyke said: Apparently there's a big party happening in the bathroom with a bunch of TP. Strobe lights and good music. It's Saturday, I might headed over there for some fun tonight. 😂 Whaaaaaaaaaat? Food, alcohol, and the toilet in one room! YOU NEVER HAVE TO EXCUSE YOURSELF! Then you can hop in the shower and suds up instantly turning it into a foam party. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 22, 2020 I hope the grays come back through time and erase their personal history. Ragnarok. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 22, 2020 https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/dad-takes-matters-hands-quarantine-21721600 Toilet paper math. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 22, 2020 23 hours ago, JoDoe27 said: I’ve heard the living room is nice this time of year! Nice and sunny yet cozy and welcoming. I think the bedroom would be a nice place to visit with a special someone. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 23, 2020 You realize how isolated you have been when a world pandemic happens and you need to make almost zero changes to your lifestyle. Speaking for myself. 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 23, 2020 An experienced, but excited man went to visit a provider. As they got started, she explained that because of CV-19, she was only offering oral services. Interested in something else he assured her that he was healthy but she insisted ...no exceptions. The man sighed but agreed. Much to his surprise, he had the most intense experience of his life. Afterwards, he kissed her goodbye and was leaving. He shook his head, turned and asked, " I'm no rookie but about halfway through you started in with the most incredible heavenly technique the rest of the way ...what do you call what you were doing? The provider smiled and replied, " It's called a CV-19 coughing fit" 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 23, 2020 Corona virus....the longest lasting thing to come out of china. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 27, 2020 A man walks into the liquor store. A tired looking clerk asks..." May I help you sir?" The man replies, " Yes, I would like a case of Corona." The clerk leans forward and coughs violently into the mans face then says. " There ya go sir, I just ordered it...you should have your case of Corona in 7 to 14 days". 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 27, 2020 On 3/23/2020 at 5:22 AM, whosyourdaty said: You realize how isolated you have been when a world pandemic happens and you need to make almost zero changes to your lifestyle. Speaking for myself. I know exactly what you mean. This has required very little adjustment in my life, and my worst hardship so far is that I'm getting bored with home cooking. By the way, I bought a dozen "mega" rolls of TP the other morning at my local Safeway shopping during the "senior only" hour from 7 to 8 am. 12 mega rolls of TP will last me 6 months. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 27, 2020 43 minutes ago, richinco said: These are great. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted March 31, 2020 Corona-free male seeks corona-free female with toilet paper and canned goods. Please send photo of the toilet paper. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 3, 2020 I believe there is a new Comandment......Thou shall not Covid thy neighbor's wife. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 11, 2020 The American Medical Association has weighed in on Trump's Corona strategy: The Allergists were in favor of scratching it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves. The Gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it, but the Neurologists thought the Administration had a lot of nerve. Meanwhile, Obstetricians felt certain everyone was laboring under a misconception, while the Ophthalmologists considered the idea shortsighted. Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!" while the Pediatricians said, "Oh, grow up!” The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while the Radiologists could see right through it. Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing and the Internists claimed it would indeed be a bitter pill to swallow. The Plastic Surgeons opined that this proposal would "put a whole new face on the matter.” The Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but the Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea. Anesthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas, and those lofty Cardiologists didn’t have the heart to say no. In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the assholes in Washington. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 14, 2020 Doug .... from the Marshall Tucker Band. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 14, 2020 Wow Well if The Other Mix Of Disease Don't Kill You!!!! Lol 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 24, 2020 Family Portrait March 2020: 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
