The Process of Learning (Sorry for the double post!)

[p53inhibitor]

I'm new to this. Very new. Two or three weeks ago I had my first escort experience. It was a FBSM with a very well reviewed local. The experience met or exceeded my expectations and satisfied my craving for novelty and excitement for a while. Last night, I was overcome with the urge to try FS.

To provide background on myself, relevant to the actions to follow in this anecdote: I'm 22 (which I'm pretty sure is far into the younger age range for this), and a graduate student in a professional 8 year healthcare program. All my money is essentially in the form of massive (maybe an exaggeration) amounts of debt, and while i don't have a lot of it, i tend to use it somewhat frivolously. Outside of school and work I hate to plan things out far in advance and I'm fairly impulsive.

Back to our regularly scheduled programming: Last night, I was overcome with the urge to try FS. I dug through reviews here, found some options that suited my tastes and budget. Had trouble reaching them. Impulsive, wanted what i wanted right away. Towards the end of the night i took a peak at backpages. Found a nice traveling girl that fit what i was looking for. Set up an appointment for later that evening, went to the appointment later that evening. Stood up. It was fair, I probably said something stupid to spook her. I called three times in a row when she didn't answer my initial call. I now see that as a mistake. She also lacked reviews and upon arriving home, I realized getting stood up may have very well been for the best.

Jump to today, leave my first final of the semester. Still feeling that strong desire for excitement and novelty in an intimate situation. Back to TOB. I had vague communication with a few providers whom were well reviewed on TOB, but because of my own vagueness and failure to set something up immediately, i couldn't get anything set up with them and lost contact. Browsed TOB more, couldn't make anything work. Okay, give up for now. Well wait, how about Backpages again, just a peek. Peek turned into a couple hours of passive browsing. Suddenly someone appeared whom seemed like a viable option. Did my research. Not local (okay i know this normally may not be a good sign). Nothing on TOB. But, few good reviews on TER. 11 spanning from 6/2014 to 06/11 to be exact. Not great, but i'll bite. I want what i want. Excitement, novelty.

Give her a call to check rates. Whoops, slightly out of my range. I apologize and tell her ill have to hold off. She stops me, asks how much I have. She can make that work. This was weird to me, but i decided to roll with it (I assumed it'd drop from an hour to 45 minutes or something and that was indeed the case). Again, against my better judgment. Set up the appointment for later in the evening.

Later in the evening: Arrive at the location. Decent enough motel in DTC. Meet her at room, girl in photo (+some pounds but i expected no less, im a realist). Yes, good sign. Head to the bathroom, drop donation (which she was expecting but whatever), begin interaction. Starts okay, oral. Cool. Switch to something else. Explains that her girlfriend lost the lube so shes using saliva. Okay. A few minutes in, totally not working for either of us. No problem, I can be flexible. Starts a lotion assisted tug. Okay i guess. Couple minutes in; wait no this is really boring. Ask to go back to oral, that part was cool. Spend a few minutes in the transition (not really sure why). Start oral, back to this being cool. Few seconds in, "lets just see how much time we have left.... about 5 minutes." Fuck. That went fast, i'm not even aroused yet. Having an impending deadline certainly wasn't conducive for further arousal. Okay, this can still be fun.

No it can't. At this point I laid there watching this woman disinterestedly, begrudgingly almost, give me oral as if she was doing it as the result of a lost bet or something. For whatever reason I'm just not getting off. I was looking for adventure, indulgence, but this... this was actually pretty depressing.

"Alright, your time is up."

"Uhh.. oh.. okay."

I go to the bathroom, clean up what little there is to clean, get dressed. We talk a bit as I'm getting dressed. Conversation is friendly. I look at my phone. Wait a minute... she ended things after less than 30 minutes. I bring it up. I don't know what I hoped to accomplish. Maybe she would refund me the difference. Or suddenly give me the most amazing blowjob ever. Obviously not. Instead, things went from friendly to defensive really fast. Whoops. Awkwardly diffuse the situation and leave.

And that's the relatively anticlimactic ending to this tale.

I chose to share this experience not to be inflammatory from a place of spite, not even to whine (though i don't doubt that it may have come off in either of those respects). Rather, to share an anecdote of someone in the process of learning something new. Maybe educate someone in a similar position. Maybe make someone more (or less) seasoned giggle at my shortcomings.

All in all, while the loss of money is a bummer and somewhat of an inconvenience, I realize that going in with such poor judgment and decision making could've gone substantially worse. So I'm probably lucky in the end. Well... not lucky. But not unlucky. And everything from the drive up until meeting the provider at her room made my heart race, so in a sense I got my excitement. Though, it was somewhat like getting to the peak of a climb in a roller coaster, having the ride stop, and being told to take the stairs down.

Thanks for reading.

Regards

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tl;dr: resources are useful and should be used, straying from guidelines probably isn't for newbies, there is no substitute for good judgment

[The Wise Old Owl]

I'm new to this. Very new. Two or three weeks ago I had my first escort experience. It was a FBSM with a very well reviewed local. The experience met or exceeded my expectations and satisfied my craving for novelty and excitement for a while. Last night, I was overcome with the urge to try FS.

To provide background on myself, relevant to the actions to follow in this anecdote: I'm 22 (which I'm pretty sure is far into the younger age range for this), and a graduate student in a professional 8 year healthcare program. All my money is essentially in the form of massive (maybe an exaggeration) amounts of debt, and while i don't have a lot of it, i tend to use it somewhat frivolously. Outside of school and work I hate to plan things out far in advance and I'm fairly impulsive.

Back to our regularly scheduled programming: Last night, I was overcome with the urge to try FS. I dug through reviews here, found some options that suited my tastes and budget. Had trouble reaching them. Impulsive, wanted what i wanted right away. Towards the end of the night i took a peak at backpages. Found a nice traveling girl that fit what i was looking for. Set up an appointment for later that evening, went to the appointment later that evening. Stood up. It was fair, I probably said something stupid to spook her. I called three times in a row when she didn't answer my initial call. I now see that as a mistake. She also lacked reviews and upon arriving home, I realized getting stood up may have very well been for the best.

Jump to today, leave my first final of the semester. Still feeling that strong desire for excitement and novelty in an intimate situation. Back to TOB. I had vague communication with a few providers whom were well reviewed on TOB, but because of my own vagueness and failure to set something up immediately, i couldn't get anything set up with them and lost contact. Browsed TOB more, couldn't make anything work. Okay, give up for now. Well wait, how about Backpages again, just a peek. Peek turned into a couple hours of passive browsing. Suddenly someone appeared whom seemed like a viable option. Did my research. Not local (okay i know this normally may not be a good sign). Nothing on TOB. But, few good reviews on TER. 11 spanning from 6/2014 to 06/11 to be exact. Not great, but i'll bite. I want what i want. Excitement, novelty.

Give her a call to check rates. Whoops, slightly out of my range. I apologize and tell her ill have to hold off. She stops me, asks how much I have. She can make that work. This was weird to me, but i decided to roll with it (I assumed it'd drop from an hour to 45 minutes or something and that was indeed the case). Again, against my better judgment. Set up the appointment for later in the evening.

Later in the evening: Arrive at the location. Decent enough motel in DTC. Meet her at room, girl in photo (+some pounds but i expected no less, im a realist). Yes, good sign. Head to the bathroom, drop donation (which she was expecting but whatever), begin interaction. Starts okay, oral. Cool. Switch to something else. Explains that her girlfriend lost the lube so shes using saliva. Okay. A few minutes in, totally not working for either of us. No problem, I can be flexible. Starts a lotion assisted tug. Okay i guess. Couple minutes in; wait no this is really boring. Ask to go back to oral, that part was cool. Spend a few minutes in the transition (not really sure why). Start oral, back to this being cool. Few seconds in, "lets just see how much time we have left.... about 5 minutes." Fuck. That went fast, i'm not even aroused yet. Having an impending deadline certainly wasn't conducive for further arousal. Okay, this can still be fun.

No it can't. At this point I laid there watching this woman disinterestedly, begrudgingly almost, give me oral as if she was doing it as the result of a lost bet or something. For whatever reason I'm just not getting off. I was looking for adventure, indulgence, but this... this was actually pretty depressing.

"Alright, your time is up."

"Uhh.. oh.. okay."

I go to the bathroom, clean up what little there is to clean, get dressed. We talk a bit as I'm getting dressed. Conversation is friendly. I look at my phone. Wait a minute... she ended things after less than 30 minutes. I bring it up. I don't know what I hoped to accomplish. Maybe she would refund me the difference. Or suddenly give me the most amazing blowjob ever. Obviously not. Instead, things went from friendly to defensive really fast. Whoops. Awkwardly diffuse the situation and leave.

And that's the relatively anticlimactic ending to this tale.

I chose to share this experience not to be inflammatory from a place of spite, not even to whine (though i don't doubt that it may have come off in either of those respects). Rather, to share an anecdote of someone in the process of learning something new. Maybe educate someone in a similar position. Maybe make someone more (or less) seasoned giggle at my shortcomings.

All in all, while the loss of money is a bummer and somewhat of an inconvenience, I realize that going in with such poor judgment and decision making could've gone substantially worse. So I'm probably lucky in the end. Well... not lucky. But not unlucky. And everything from the drive up until meeting the provider at her room made my heart race, so in a sense I got my excitement. Though, it was somewhat like getting to the peak of a climb in a roller coaster, having the ride stop, and being told to take the stairs down.

Thanks for reading.

Regards

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tl;dr: resources are useful and should be used, straying from guidelines probably isn't for newbies, there is no substitute for good judgment

Son, Mark this up to a learning experience and go forth to learn some more. These ladies, God Love 'em, are a fickle group. You meet the good, the bad, and the ugly (to quote an overused movie theme). The good ones will wow you, the bad ones will pow you, and the ugly ones, well let's just say you'll be saying, "Not now, you...". Do some EXTENSIVE research, budget carefully, have an option if at first you don't succeed, and keep pluggin' away at it. Eventually, you'll find the right one, and all will be bliss. Bad experiences are part of the learning process. Learn from them and don't be discouraged. All that glitters is not gold; sometimes they are just rhinestones glistening in the dark of night.

The Wise Old Owl

A wise man, but not a wise guy

[p53inhibitor]

Thank you for your insight, The Wise Old Owl!

[Crazy Horse]

22 is an interesting age...adult responsibility and decisions to make yet few actual adult experiences to base those decisions on(except perhaps the massive debt today's educational system harnesses young people with). Life is for gathering together those experiences to base future decisions on.

As I recall me and my friends at that age learning our own life lessons we weren't all that receptive to advice from old codgers who couldn't possibly remember what it was like to be young; each generation have to make their own mistakes. As though for a lesson to stick it has to be experienced personally. There seems to be no way to pass along the pain, pleasure, disappointment, euphoria or any other emotions that comes with life from one generation to the next. They have to be experienced by each individual to really have an impact on a person.

So...instead of putting myself in the place of the old codger trying to teach the young whippersnapper let's start out this way. While you describe the situation well enough to let the rest of us fill your shoes you didn't really tell us what were the lessons you walked away with from your first baby steps into the hobby/profession. Give us a follow up and maybe some of us old timers can tell you if you're on base or headed in the wrong direction rather than just telling you what you should have learned.

...Happy Hobbying...

...Crazy Horse...

[limey]

Ill add to this. We do need to get some idea of lessons learned. EVERYONE can say"I remember when..." But my memories could not be nearly the same. Some of the lessons maybe the same. I can remember going to a race course and having my college buddies holding me down and pouring Southern Comfort down my throat. Everybody laughed including me. I hate Southern Comfort to this day. So you seem to be ahead of others in your age group, or not. We cant know. What we can say is everybody different and your personality is still developing. Experience develops that. There is no way around that. You can accelerate that a little and see how the fun develops or flops. Keep doing what you do and enjoy the ride. The playing field is open now.

[Gentlejeff1]

Welcome to Hobbying 101.

As in all things hopefully you'll soon learn to make your choices with your head rather than your crotch (although he does need to be excited).

BP can be treacherous until you learn to navigate the reefs. Stolen pics abound and there are lots of amateurs who have no idea what they are doing. Research, research, research!

If you follow the abundant advise of those of us on tob who have been doing this awhile you'll be ok but remember that Mr Happy doesn't listen very well and he will try to convince you to roll the dice.

My advice, look for the ladies 30 - 45 (although there are some real gems that are younger but they seem to disappear quickly whereas the more mature ladies are around for the long haul). While they may not be 10's they tend to know what they are doing, operate more safely, are very sweet and appreciative and most of all they tend to be VERY horny. They will give you the closest thing to your fantasy (but your fantasy and reality will probably never be the same).

I have learned to only go with girls who have reviews (need to be mostly good ones and 1 or 2 bad ones mixed in with a lot of good ones is fine). I did my share of toftt and am leaving that to others nowadays. Best bet, go with ladies who post here and/or have good reviews and seriously consider joining p411 which is the most reputable vetting service out there. The investment will pay for itself if it avoids only one bad encounter.

Finally, while I am sure that the ladies who ask $300 and up are very good I stick with the $150-250/hr range. They have given me lots of pleasure through the years and I can't see how much better the more expensive ladies can be that it's worth the higher donation.

411's are ok now and then but generally you should be able to do all the research you need on your own. If you hit a wall and still have to know more then do a 411 but guys who expect everyone else to do the legwork get shunned here.

If you'd like some direction to some wonderful ladies PM me and I'll send you a list.

Finally, let me say that you are VERY unlikely to find a relationship here that goes beyond the time you pay for no matter how sweet and wonderful the lady is. This is not dating. This is sex. Hopefully you'll understand the distinction and avoid the heartbreak of thinking you with find your eternal love here. Just sayin' ...

[Josh]

OP,

Okay, I will sound like your father, here.

I was also in school forever in my 20s, but I would never think of paying for sex back then. Managing your debt is incredibly important when you are young. Also, you must be surrounded by hot college-age girls. Why not work on your game with the civie girls? I used to TA undergrad courses with the sole purpose of sleeping around. Or hit the gym or the swimming pool. Being in school is the best, and it will never get any better.

[Guest]

Write a review!

[p53inhibitor]

First off, I'd like to thank all of you for taking the time to read my wall of text and for your support and insight.

Since it was brought up a few times, I'll address what I feel I've learned from the above experience.

Probably foremost is that there is absolutely no substitute for good judgment. I'm hesitant to even mention that as a lesson because realistically everything in my life has taught me that. But it certainly came up here. There were a number of blatant red flags and in the back of my mind i certainly considered them, but i was stuck on an impulse and thinking with a certain appendage. The end result was -$200 with little to show for it (aside from an experience which i could argue was INvaluable), but I'm very well aware that people before me may have made similar mistakes and come out in much worse positions.

Past that I've learned that BP may very well not be the best place for beginners. It seems easy enough (and i may be wrong here too) to avoid outright scams and LE with due diligence, but past that there are a variety of ASPs using BP and it seems like a very dynamic venue overall. It seems that without proper seasoning it'd be really easy to miss a lot of cues in both advertisement and initial contact that may foreshadow the encounter.

TOB seems to be a great resource and friendly community. At least while starting out, I see very little reason to stray away from it. In fact, my first encounter was set up based on reviews on TOB and i had one the night after the above experience with someone whom was also well reviewed on TOB. Both great experiences. That said, I'm glad I was able to TOFTT and provide a review based on the encounter (still waiting on it to post), as insignificant as it may be in the grand scheme of things.

OP,

Okay, I will sound like your father, here.

I was also in school forever in my 20s, but I would never think of paying for sex back then. Managing your debt is incredibly important when you are young. Also, you must be surrounded by hot college-age girls. Why not work on your game with the civie girls? I used to TA undergrad courses with the sole purpose of sleeping around. Or hit the gym or the swimming pool. Being in school is the best, and it will never get any better.

I certainly appreciate the fatherly perspective and contribution.

As far as debt goes, I totally agree and will be the first to admit that my spending habits are somewhat.... wonky. Overall I'm about in the median of debt for students in my program. I'm pretty careful not to extend myself beyond that and don't short myself on money for rent, food, bills, etc. Past that, money has somewhat become a joke to me because I've gotten so used to being in debt. So while I'm trying to stay within reason financially, I also like to treat myself to new experiences. It pretty much keeps me sane while trudging my way through 8+ years of a rigorous science education. That's my rationalization, anyway.

In response to your second point, I certainly am surrounded by attractive girls my age and do work on my game with them. Civilian relationships are my mainstay source of both physical and emotional intimacy and I have no intention of changing that. I'm drawn to escort services primarily by the novelty of the whole thing. It's a very unique experience. The idea of having a punctuated encounter with a stranger is something that I'd found alluring for a while and there's a certain degree of excitement in it for me. I also really enjoy exploring this otherwise very hidden world. I've had a lot of fun talking to ASPs in the midst of encounters as well as reading posts from clients on here. It's a dynamic and complex universe with millions of intricacies and it's fun to explore and be a part of on that merit alone.

Past that, my experiences thus far have taught me about myself in ways that civilian relationships haven't.

One major thing I've learned, and this probably won't come as a surprise to anyone with years on me, is that I have no idea what I want or like.

In the heat of a drawn out civilian encounter, responding to cues from the woman and acting on my own instincts and desires I certainly feel that I know what I want and act on it. But three times now I've been asked something along the lines of "So what do you like?" and I've basically frozen up and not had a great answer. In that same respect, I think the escort scenario provides a different environment that may, at least in some regards, be more conducive towards sexual exploration and experimentation than some civilian encounters might be. Though I honestly haven't taken advantage of it in that regard yet.

Past that, while I love sex, I think I might be learning that I actually enjoy everything that leads up to it than the sex itself. While I've definitely enjoyed the sexual encounters, there has been some sort of weirdness in just jumping into an encounter for me and I think it's mostly due to lacking that whole "chase" aspect. Though I think this concept also circles back to the fact that I don't know what I want or like yet, so it's hard to be certain in my judgment on this matter.

Write a review!

I did! I chose to leave the provider's name out of this post because I felt that providing my full perspective alongside her name would make the post come off as inflammatory or aggressive and it wouldn't really be fair to the provider or the readers. And it wasn't a scam by any means so the review wasn't very urgent. There is a review pending though. It's just stuck in that phase for a bit due to me being new.

Again, thank you all for taking the time to read my obnoxiously lengthy posts, for being welcoming and for providing insight.

[fork]

But three times now I've been asked something along the lines of "So what do you like?" and I've basically frozen up and not had a great answer.

If you don't have a specific need in mind (and even if you do) I think it pays to give a vague answer like "I like to go with the flow". And then do exactly that. Let her lead and you'll have a better time because the encounter is going as she likes. It may be GFE, or PSE, or 3G, but it's as good as it's going to get.

If she's not leading, then she's a submissive type and you should take control and do whatever you like (with consent of course).

But if you tell an energizer bunny-type girl that you want sensual GFE, or tell a mechanical 3G girl that you want to face fuck her, well, good luck.

[p53inhibitor]

My advice, look for the ladies 30 - 45 (although there are some real gems that are younger but they seem to disappear quickly whereas the more mature ladies are around for the long haul). While they may not be 10's they tend to know what they are doing, operate more safely, are very sweet and appreciative and most of all they tend to be VERY horny.

Interestingly enough I came in with the idea of of visiting with someone in that age range. While my FBSM experience was with someone whom I perceived to be in her early 30's, I haven't visited someone in the range for FS, though I've certainly had a couple people in mind! Based on what you've said I feel I really ought to. I can probably learn a lot from someone more mature while having a new and exciting experience.

One thing I've been hesitant about in this regard is that not only would I be ~half their age, I also look fairly young. I've worried that this may be somewhat off-putting for some providers and have a negative influence on the experience in that regard. That said, I always make a point to mention my age early on in contact since I figure it's unexpected.

Thank you for the advice though! It's definitely something ill continue to consider and hopefully soon take action on.

If you don't have a specific need in mind (and even if you do) I think it pays to give a vague answer like "I like to go with the flow". And then do exactly that. Let her lead and you'll have a better time because the encounter is going as she likes. It may be GFE, or PSE, or 3G, but it's as good as it's going to get.

This. This is exactly what I've been looking for.

Thank you, sir!

[geecue2]

Hobby well and prosper, young Padawan Jedi.

[Guest]

I have some advice but it'll be a little personal.

So please check for a Private Message (PM) from me.

[Falstaff]

You sound a little like me when I began hobbying, but I was forty years older! Do lots of research on P411 and TOB, or other places, and stay away from BP until you develop enough sixth sense to use it intelligently. I'll echo the advice that older women (30+) are more likely to give you the sort of experience you're looking for, at least initially. You're tight on funds, so you need to be diligent in research and look for ladies with a solid history of good reviews. They're out there! Happy hunting! Check your PM's.

[Audrey Astor]

Interestingly enough I came in with the idea of of visiting with someone in that age range. While my FBSM experience was with someone whom I perceived to be in her early 30's, I haven't visited someone in the range for FS, though I've certainly had a couple people in mind! Based on what you've said I feel I really ought to. I can probably learn a lot from someone more mature while having a new and exciting experience.

One thing I've been hesitant about in this regard is that not only would I be ~half their age, I also look fairly young. I've worried that this may be somewhat off-putting for some providers and have a negative influence on the experience in that regard. That said, I always make a point to mention my age early on in contact since I figure it's unexpected.

Thank you for the advice though! It's definitely something ill continue to consider and hopefully soon take action on.

This. This is exactly what I've been looking for.

Thank you, sir!

Given the maturity that is coming through in your posts, and communication style, it would not be "off-putting". You are not alone out there young man.

Good luck, and better wishes in your next adventure.

[mtnman2000]

OP,

Okay, I will sound like your father, here.

I was also in school forever in my 20s, but I would never think of paying for sex back then. Managing your debt is incredibly important when you are young. Also, you must be surrounded by hot college-age girls. Why not work on your game with the civie girls? I used to TA undergrad courses with the sole purpose of sleeping around. Or hit the gym or the swimming pool. Being in school is the best, and it will never get any better.

+1

And, paying for it skews what is normal and that is not a good thing at 22. Work on yourself is my suggestion. Manage your money.

[pitbull]

You have put yourself out here in a vulnerable manner, and I have to say that I believe that paying for sex at such a young age is an unhealthy endeavor. When I was 22, the Internet did not exist, and I think that was a good thing in many respects...because it sounds as if you are lost in the internet images of women -- lost in the enticing prospects of "the thrill."

My advice is talk to the women around you. You are not a virgin, and it sounds like you are not too socially awkward. This hidden world is not necessarily a good one. It can lead to obsession and giving away a lot of money that you don't have. I wish you the best of luck, but beware of this hobby.

[dj278]

Nice post, OP.

I've also had the experience of not knowing what to say when asked what I want to do. I've been hobbying for about 6 months now, and have found a provider who really does it for me. I've seen her 6 times in 4 weeks, and am feeling very comfortable with her, so I asked her what she exactly means with her question. Turns out she is asking about fetishes/kinks. I was wondering if I had some I was not aware of, and she laughed and said if I had any I would know. So I happily labeled my self as Vanilla. I'm just a Vanilla guy who goes with the flow, and proud of it!

I'm in my mid-50's, and have been a serial monogamist since high school. I finally came to the conclusion that romantic relationships are not for me and took up the hobby. The elements of courtship seemed to be wired into my brain at first. I just wanted to visit my new favorite provider and see no one else. I would spend a lot of time thinking about her. I even thought about how I could help her with some things outside of our time together. The urge to have a relationship is still there even though my logical brain is still solid with the idea of not having this. It's like some kind of instinct or Hollywood romance imprinting.

Then, my ATF took off for 2 months. Crap! Found another and it picked up right where I left off with my ATF. Actually even better the 2 times I have seen this new angel.

The hobby is new for me, but starting to feel natural and easy, which was not how it started at all. I probably spent a grand before it started becoming a life purpose.

I did go for a BP girl once and totally lucked out. It was a memorable time. 19 year old Asian cutie blew me cim for $100/30 minutes. Since then I have stayed strictly P411. I'll never gamble again on someone without reviews since reading all the horror stories.

Again, nice read, OP.

DJ

[Bit Banger]

I have to disagree - I was paying for sex around the world when I was 19-22. On a limited budget, too.

One does need to keep a careful eye on the budget, though. Right now your "disposable income" might be better spent on paying down your debt. Compound interest may be a blessing to the investor, but it's a real bitch for the debtor! Paying off those college loans early can save you thousands of $s. Perhaps the greatest gift my parents gave me, with help from the GI Bill, was a debt free education.

[Wendy Whitney]

Almost everyone is in debt. Yet, everyone likes to treat themselves sometimes Do it in moderation, don't go overboard and make sure the bills are taken care of first!

[Guest]

OP- you state that you are impulsive and want to set something up spur of the moment. However, I really feel that this is something you need to take your time on if you're looking for a good experience at a good rate. Everyone has already said it, but research and patience will pay off.

I think there's a common misconception that providers are just sitting around their house, showered and made up and waiting for clients to call. Some providers certainly do work this way, but not me. And not several others I know. I need time to plan for an appointment, and I'm not just talking about a day- I usually need at least 3-4 days advance notice, as my schedule fills fast. I do this sort of work in order to have freedom over my schedule, not to work regular hours.

I have seen several men who were younger than me, as young as 20 in one case. I am not turned off by younger men at all- as long as they can prove to me that they are mature and trustworthy during the screening process.

[Bit Banger]

I think there's a common misconception that providers are just sitting around their house, showered and made up and waiting for clients to call. Some providers certainly do work this way, but not me. And not several others I know. ...

This is the brothel model. You have to be ready for the line-up if you want the next customer.

I'm told it was also standard practice in the days before Internet & cell phones when you placed a print ad and waited by the incall landline for customers. Now you can take that call anyplace (if you want to) or deal with pre-booking through voice or text(& email) messages. You're not tied to that phone line for business.

[MonetMarie]

Chin up it gets better! lots better

[Jez UaBriain]

Thank you for such a frank, accounting of your FS encounter. You sir, are mature in your wording , and thoughts for one so young. And I can understand your need to tell us how young you are. Just as I always state in my adds that I am a mature provider. I do not want to embarrass anyone, or be embarrassed about age. So it is important to me that we are upfront about where we are in life.

You are in the right place. We have some mature hobbyists here who are really good guys. They will not steer you wrong should you need their advice. I know you are used to thinking with your big head, and that is what you will want to use mostly when looking for your next lady. Research a few. Maybe see if they are willing to see a young guy. And hopefully your next encounter will be a wild, romp under the the sheets. And keep posting on here. I really liked your honest,frank way of discussing this. I am sure others do too.

[gettin' up there]

I agree with Josh and Mtnman. I think the hobby is not a good idea for someone so young. You should be spending your playtime figuring out how to develop a relationship where sex comes as part of the process. I know this is not what you want to hear but you have bigger issues that need attention over how to find the right escort, which is, as others have indicated, something that is solveable by research or luck. Getting great sex for $$ is addictive and should not be where you should be at age 22 and living on borrowed money. The hobby is best left for those with disposable $$. Otherwise, you will fall for a provider and believe you have found love and may make more bad decisions regarding what you must afford. Most of us would kill to be 22, single, and in a university environment. That you are turning to escorts at your age and position in life indicates to me that you are missing something that you shouldn't and should figure out how to get what most guys are getting for free at your age. Sorry I'm so preachy. Just gotta tell you what I think you should hear.

[Bit Banger]

Have you nay-sayers considered that the OP may be spending his time building his career instead of out chasing skirts, yet still needs that release and women's touch? With escorts he can scratch that itch w/o the emotional entanglements & commitments required by most civilians. Yes, it will cost some $s which might be more useful paying down his debt. But if he continues to use his big head (as he has demonstrated) and follows a strict budget, then that shouldn't be a problem.

[gettin' up there]

Trust me, with time he will sink scanning/studying the ads on EB and BP and doing the research that all the old dogs on the board recommend, he ought to have the time to chase after a few co-eds. The price is right and he is at the time of life when a person ought to be learning about real relationships, not learning how to step thru the minefield of escorts. I love our world of ladies and am addicted to the GFE, so I don't want to seem hypocritical, but I came to it after decades of a real and ongoing relationship.

[Guest pejo]

I love all the grandfatherly advice from the AARP crowd--"You're too young son!" Have any of you seen anything in the OP's comments that suggests he wants to stop? NO! He wants to keep going. He just wants to be able to post his experiences here, learn a thing or two, and try to get better at this.

My advice to OP: If the hobby is scratching an itch you have, keep at it. If not, stop. If you want to get better at it, keep trying, keep posting and good luck. Also, pretty sure most of the providers here will be HAPPY to show an energetic 20-year old a thing or two. You know, in aid of his education.

[Josh]

I love all the grandfatherly advice from the AARP crowd-

Thanks for being PC, you are only too kind! My wife refers to me as an enfeebled, geriatric, fossil -- and I'm not even 50 yet

The OP says that he is in an 8-yr healthcare program which sounds like undergrad and medical school wrapped up into one. If so, any debt that he racks up now will be made up in a flash. Medical school is an almost sure ticket to doing well later on. So unless he goes apeshit with escorts, he will be fine:D

[p53inhibitor]

People have taken a lot more interest in this than I expected!

I appreciate everyone's input, you've all given me a lot to think about which, again, is above and beyond what I really expected.

To those supporting future endeavors: I appreciate your enthusiasm and support!

To the "naysayers": You have all made really good points and shed light on a lot of ideas that I may not have considered as easily or at all, so thank you for that!

I won't argue against the inherently addictive nature of this "hobby" and have myself getting somewhat preoccupied with the thoughts of it. I think at some point someone basically alluded to the idea of chasing a fantasy that i likely won't get which I find to be kind of a funny but also not unreasonable idea.

Because it was brought up a couple times I would like to point out that this is totally not my sole source of company, rather just an experimental supplement. I'm not sure it matters too much, but i suppose that does change the context of things a bit.

Again, thank you all for your input!

The OP says that he is in an 8-yr healthcare program which sounds like undergrad and medical school wrapped up into one.

I did four years of undergrad in a different state and im in grad school here for 4+ years for a total of 8+ years. But yeah, I basically specified to distinguish it from a lower paying healthcare profession like nursing or some kind of technician and provide the context of debt and future income.

And probably because I'm an elitist asshole.