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About fork

  • Rank
  • Birthday 01/08/1970


  • Location
    Your Mom's house
  • Interests
    forking, spooning.
  • Occupation
  1. Condom Broke - Freaking Out a Little

    Take a deep breath and go get tested. Whatever you do, don't start Googling STI pics!
  2. Proper etiquette?

    I don't see anything wrong with asking about rates for a lady's TIME in a text or email, if she hasn't posted them. I have never known it to cause an issue. I am not going to go through getting screened or wasting any time talking about schedules just to be told she's out of my league financially. This is one of the first things I typically get a handle on.
  3. A tough one for me

    All very true - humans are a bad judge of risk and psychic ability is not real. However, if you do NOT listen to your irrational "gut", and you DO get caught, that abusive little voice in your head will be calling you an idiot for the rest of your life. I know, because ... well just trust me on this one So better safe than sorry. There's no harm in bailing other than a cancellation fee and a rosy palm.
  4. My Breif Forray into the Civilian World

    I'm thinking that's not going to go over well ... we are waiting for the status report Your text message answer was a good one, leave it at that!
  5. Newbie question about hotels

    Look at the building from the outside ... some hotels have section with 2 or so stories (usually the convention rooms) and a tower with guest rooms. That tells you which way to walk for the elevator ... obviously the tall part. Also, phones are GREAT. In the past, you had nothing to do with your hands but look nervous. Now, just stare at your phone or better yet, type on it as you walk in. No need to make eye contact in 2019! If you walk into a wall or miss the turn for the elevator, no one will notice. Just an idiot on his phone. If she's late, just sit in the lobby and scroll endlessly on the phone. People do it all the time. Also, walk slow and just act tired or bored. People don't come into their own hotel nervous. They come in tired.
  6. Self Care

    You sound down, dude ... to be honest, modern meds and therapists can work wonders these days if it's serious. But if it's run of the mill blues, just change things up. If you're not active, get active. If you're often alone, go some place to make friends (a meetup is better than a bar). If you have too much going on, cut out the complexity and stress. If someone is bringing you down all the time, figure out how to end that relationship. If you keep doing the same stuff you will be in the same place.
  7. My Breif Forray into the Civilian World

    Anyone over 40 who can't find a suitable relationship is either a true introvert, is socially defective, or has unrealistic standards. For me it's (D) all of the above.
  8. Asking about the Menu

    The upsell is NEVER a good time. The only reasonable exception IMHO is for greek, just because the market dictates it. If you're afraid of the upsell, you can directly say "you are asking X for 30 minutes of time, so that's exactly how much money I'm bringing, there is no upsell right?" You're not asking about specific services, just asking if X is enough. If she's an upsell girl she's going to immediately get concerned and ask you what things you want to do or tell you to bring more money if you want more fun. At which point you hang up
  9. Asking about the Menu

    Why worry about it? All I really want to know is if I'm going to jail or not. As long as I'm not, I'm willing to risk a little money and see what happens. Sure, some activities are better than others and some things have to be on the menu or I'm not going back for a second visit. But I as long as my balls get drained I'm not going to worry about knowing exactly in advance how that's going to happen. I get rather worried when a girl sends me a detailed menu via text message.
  10. New you!

    The new year is now 36 hours old and I haven't been laid yet so my plans are already off the rails!
  11. YMMV

    I always thought it was Get In / Get Paid / Get Out Meaning, it's the provider's modus operandi (not the client's)
  12. How to bring up a threesome?

    I would start with "do you like girls?" If I was going to do a 3-way I'd make sure that she was into girls. Because watching that go down is half the fun. Only then, "do you have a friend?"
  13. Go Topless Day

    Just like freedom of speech doesn't mean anyone has to listen, freedom to show titties doesn't mean you have to look. I'd rather live in a world where bare tits are legal, regardless of size, shape, or color. Show'em off!
  14. Colorado Sprigs

    We're used to this here in Colorado Springs ... you may notice that all the men have abnormally well-developed right arms.
  15. It must be me

    I think you have to look carefully at the lady's ad, how she writes and when she posts, and her reviews, and her website (if any). It should be quickly clear that some girls are in the Motel 6 and will push the dog off the bed whenever you're ready to come over, while others want a day or two's notice and will do full screening. Some will only take text messages, some will want a P411 request. Some won't even notice if you text 5 times before you get an answer, and some will block the shit out of you if you try that. Different girls require different approaches.