The Wise Old Owl

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    97
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About The Wise Old Owl

  • Rank
    Active Participant
  • Birthday 11/01/1955

Converted

  • Biography
    I'm old dammitt
  • Location
    Happy Springs Retirement Home
  • Interests
    Waking up, finding my teeth, not falling down
  • Occupation
    Retired astronaut
  1. Excitement at Shotgun Willie’s last night

    This reminds me why I don't go to strip clubs anymore. I want to see pretty women and entertaining dancing. Not violence and bloodshed. If I wanted those things, I'd go to a motorcycle club's bar...
  2. What's the oddest place you've done it???

    Careful in publishing names or photos of military personnel, while that person is in the USAF, or still alive, could get them subject to UCMJ discipline.
  3. Stormy Daniels

    Here's why here's why I don't understand Democrats. One Democratic president gets his d*ck sucked in the Oval Office, and they blame the non-professional woman that did it. They vilify her in the press and personally and call the president of victim of her predatory behavior. One future president who ran as a Republican, had his d*ck sucked by a professional, when he was not in the Oval Office, and they blamed that future, and now, president for the event. They vilify him in the press and personally, and call the woman a victim of his predatory behavior. Is this a double standard, or what? The Wise Old Owl Sorry. No sex. We're British.
  4. Making Love vs. Sex

    Sex without love can be satisfying but empty. Love without sex can be fufilling but not satisfying. Sex with love is both satisfying and fufilling. Love with sex, is both lasting and meaningfull. Love is not sex. Sex is not love. Love and sex can exist seperately. Together, love and sex are inseperable. The Wise Old Owl I'm too sexy for my pants. I just forgot where I left them... (My teeth too. Can't find them anywhere)
  5. No Shave November - Are You Doing It

    I participate in No Shave November. And No Shave December. And No Shave January, February, March, April, Etc. I just don't shave. Trim? Yes! I prefer the same on my women. If you shave it off, shave it all off. If you trim it, trim it close. My bushy beard never gets more than a half an inch long. Your bearded Bush should be the same. The Wise Old Owl Just as nobody likes a board, except surfers. Nobody likes an untrimmed bush, Except a squirrel. (I already flossed my teeth, today.)
  6. Today’s burning question- Do cats fart?

    Cats do fart. Then they blame it on the dog. They also pee on your shoes, scratch the couch, eat what you left on the counter, and get hair on your favorite sweater. They blame all of that on the dog too. Cats are smart. They know you'll believe them. The dog looks guilty. All the time. Even if they didn't do it. Cats are evil. Cats are manipulative. Cats are good at putting the blame on other people or pets. Cats never tell the truth. They always lie; on the couch,on the bed, on the rug, on your clothes. They lie everywhere. Damn cats!
  7. Providers asking for deposit

    When I rent a Uhaul truck, I leave a deposit so they know I'll return it in the condition I left with it. The U-Haul truck doesn't tell me how fast or slow I can go. It doesn't tell me to turn left or right, or scold me when I don't turn in the direction it likes. The U-Haul truck doesn't tell me when to go forward or back up. The U-Haul truck has a time limit on it but I usually have it for an entire day. As long as I pay for it, the truck is mine to use as I please. It doesn't object when I want to go somewhere for a while and then come back. The U-Haul truck might know my name and where I live but after I've returned it, it doesn't retain that information. The U-Haul truck doesn't care if I'm young or old, tall or short, skinny or fat, or the size of my... hands. I can rent the size of the U-Haul truck I want and I know the price going in, it doesn't charge me more as we drive along. When I'm done using the U-Haul truck, I drive it back where it was, turn it in and never worry about it trying to retaliate against me if I write a bad review about the experience. If escorts for more like U-Haul trucks, there would be less bad reviews and better experiences. The Wise Old Owl I still know how, And where to drive. It just takes me longer to get there. (I've got the map. I just can't read it anymore.)
  8. The Trials of a Newbie - Chapter 2

    Orca? Sorry, No.
  9. Fwb

    Men use women. Mostly for sex. Women use men. Mostly for money. Marriage is a legal reason to use each other. For whatever you can get. You pay in the beginning. You pay during. You pay in the end. You pay no matter what. You're better off renting the cow, To get the milk, rather than buying it. Beside, new, fresh milk, Is better than old spoiled milk. The Wise Old Owl Milking cows For more than half a century. (Hell! Where's my bucket!)
  10. CHRISTMAS MOVE PICKS KIDDIES.

    NYPD Detective John McClain might disagree with you. Ho ho ho!
  11. Myth vs. Reality

    Men: The only d*ck that matters is the one I got. The only p*ssy that matters is the one I can get. Women: The only p*ssy that matters is mine. The only dick that matters is the one attached to my man. Women Escorts: The only p*ssy that matters is mine, or the one I can get.The only d*ck that matters is the one that pays. And the one that pays the most, matters most. Sorry. The cruel harsh reality is money makes the world go 'round. Love is a cash only business. The Wise Old Owl I've got the money, Honey, If you have the time! (Let me check my wallet...)
  12. CHRISTMAS MOVE PICKS KIDDIES.

    Die Hard is not a Christmas Movie!
  13. Now They're Coming for Victoria's Secret

    Some men like Victoria's Secret models (some women too). Some men like Lane Bryant models (some women too). Some men like both (some women too). Some men like men in Playgirl (some women too). Some men like women in Playboy (some women too). Everyone likes different things. While I understand your likes and dislikes, don't tell me mine are wrong. To each his, or her, own. Variety is the spice of life. The Wise Old Owl I can take a lickin', And keep on tickin'. (Just don't wind me too tight)
  14. Strippers make lousy escorts.

    I must agee. However, most escorts, if so inclined, make great strippers. They know how to please, and you can meet them later for...ahem, relief.
  15. Fall Fun - Halloween Horror - Who likes Scary Movies?

    Today's horror movies just suck. Give me "The Wolfman", classic "Frankenstein", "The Mummy", or anything with Lon Chaney or Bela Lugosi. Please. BTW: Mel Brooks' classic comedy movie, "Young Frankenstein" is hilarious. Too bad they don't make that kind of film anymore.