What? Hmm??

[Calisurfgirl]

Established or "seasoned" hobbyists are accustom to a standard of conversation "etiquette" between interested party (them) seeking the company with a provider they have expressed interest in. Respectful hobbyists are aware that most providers are not sitting by the phone already showered, cosmetics applied, perfumed, with legs crossed heels on when they (hobbyists) text, call or email a provider. They understand we (providers) have a plethora of circumstances, situations, variables or in lamiens terms "life" continuously happening as well. Maybe this is because we are a business not a product. Why then the nuance or trend to have hobbyists not all but more than a few. Texting short prompts not inquiring but instead"rates?, deposit?, and there personal needs. Receiving points for punctuation, this being the only positive I can render from above example.

Most living in modern society make allowances for everyday introductions.  Hello, My name is _______ , etc. Providers are not listed items on a menu "al a carte" to have delivered like an Amazon prime purchase. Each provider has there means of verification which creates independent providers a level of comfort when scheduling with a new hobbyist or an ATF hobbyist , disclosing intimate details is not a minor task for us. It may seem to some hobbyists that providers are being difficult or requesting to much.

 I ask you then to contemplate for a moment.  If I (hobbyist) were receiving inquiries requiring responses about personal and/or intimate details, or were driving to a unfamiliar location (private residence or hotel) to meet a person whom you had never met.  What would your requirements be to achieve a required level of security and comfort. Curiosity should not lack anyone's ability to be courteous and respectful. 

Edited October 11, 2023 by Calisurfgirl

[Audrey Astor]

You beat me to this post. I’m not sure what is happening. I’ve literally received P411 requests at 10p for an 11p out. Maybe we’re viewed how the media portrays us. We have mortgages, dentist appts, sports practice, repair ppl coming meetings for civie job etc, just like the guys. I prefer advance planning so that I’m at my best. 

 I think sometimes it’s just that newer folks don’t know how to open the ads to read the details of availability etc. I wish we could do a tutorial. 

[average1]

Thanks for your post and sorry this is happening.  As a fellow on the other side of the equation, I appreciate when ladies are friendly, professional, engaging and fun.  Over the years I've done my best to be respectful when contacting ladies, especially for the first time.  Most have been wonderful.  A few have responded with one word questions or answers and don't seem very engaging.  I would never expect someone to "be ready" in an hour and will continue to do the best I can when contacting a lady to let them know I am interested, friendly, respectful and believe in consenting adults having shared fun.  Sounds like you are running into some guys with unreasonable expectations and don't have the respectful skills to increase the odds of a fine encounter.  Again, so sorry this is happening.

[mustang]

There HAS to be a happy medium somewhere.  I frequently see posts that demand deposits for advanced appointments, I see posts that demand contact ONLY when I am ready to meet, and then there is situation.  I see nothing t be gained by extolling the virtues of the way I try to schedule appointments but I have always been respectful, even IF the provider is not.

It seems that the fun of this hobby is quickly going the way of the extinct dodo bird.  Clients and providers both share in the decline of this endeavor. 

[Kae Marie]

Screening is as much for providers as it is for clients. We are both getting a taste of what time spent together could be like beyond the initial fantasy of our ads. Approaching each other as we would like things to go is a great start and keeping the Golden Rule in your pocket never hurts. We all find our matches in the end so let’s keep the search and inquiry on the tracks towards the good times we come together looking for. 
 

XxKae Marie

[sparkey600]

On 10/11/2023 at 5:42 PM, Audrey Astor said:

You beat me to this post. I’m not sure what is happening. I’ve literally received P411 requests at 10p for an 11p out. Maybe we’re viewed how the media portrays us. We have mortgages, dentist appts, sports practice, repair ppl coming meetings for civie job etc, just like the guys. I prefer advance planning so that I’m at my best. 

 I think sometimes it’s just that newer folks don’t know how to open the ads to read the details of availability etc. I wish we could do a tutorial. 

Personally, I think it's an over well lack of respect most people have now days. We are no longer in the universe, we are now in the "me niverse" 

Everyone seems to think their wishes should come first, respect and manners come second with these people. Makes me wonder what's going on with society....

Then again I get most of it. Kids are staying with their parents well into their 30's. They are coddled "Stay her until you can afford to move out" Really, did anyone of us hear this? Nope, not any way! We got "when are you going to move out?" To this conversation, I think most people wanting or looking for an ASP are now "spoiled" looking for an instant gratification, rather than a relationship with a caring provider. Most of us a little bit older people were more than glad to move out of our house, so we could be out from under our parent's thumb. Not now. "we cant afford o be on our own" We have car payments, student debt, etc.....The next generation has no manners, has no sense of of self reliance and it makes me sick. Rant over. Please go ahead and go about your normal business. 

[Mr.Pink]

Let me boil it down for you, NO LAST MINUTE APPOINTMENTS. 💋

[Hobby Hobbit -Banned]

I'm sorry, beautiful Calisurfgirl but I'm not sure I'm tracking so here are my thoughts.

The knights boiling it down to "NO LAST MINUTE APPOINTMENTS" got you all fucked up. 

Shoving the mutual requirement of respect and consideration that is also frequently ignored by too many providers aside reveals the elephant in the room. Some of y'all have been taught to expect too much from hobbyists, the relationship with which is or, knighthood aside , should be, more transactional than emotional. Yeah, yeah, yeah feelers but, can you imagine having to walk into a "business", any business, with the expectation the provider's needs come before your own? (Looking around) Aren't I the reason your bell rang??

But no. Like some weird dating or relationship game of Charades, there's this artificially high expectation of respect, personability, consideration, sensitivity, (insert higher level human emotion here) toward providers that doesn't resonate with the business side of this which, at least for the hobbyist, more often than not simply requires receiving the satisfaction, be it giving or receiving, they hope for. Period.

Of course, that one hobbyist's definition of total satisfaction may be one or a combination of a QV/HH/HR/DAY/WEEK long session of DFK, FIV, BBBJ, CIM, Greek...DATY, insert activity here, doesn't mean it's on the menu makes encounters YMMV, a-la-carte, by definition, right?! But in a world where reviews may or may not be useful, the nature of the business not only forbids explicitness in advertising, depending on the provider, the "right" approach may be, "Hi my name is Hobby Hobbit and I work at Acme Products" so "don't ask details" but "give me ample notice"...be ever proper but then, ever bothered, others prefer a short, sweet, ready now approach, only?! And I just spotted another elephant.

Not to judge but, you're OUTCALL only which requires that you are amenable to your client's venue/schedule to satisfy your business objectives. You have no website or other listing to reference, and there is no mention of what the proper approach for you is in your listing. So taken by your beauty, what do you want the fella with the fleeting impulse of a hard dick and a pocket (or two) full of disposable income with a small window to stick it in to do but ask what may actually be that stupid question, simply because the alignment of Venus and Mars is off at the moment? Ask it? Or move on? So many choices, so little time.

Long story short, the importance of clear expectations and the understanding of mutual limitations on both sides cannot be overstated.

Edited October 17, 2023 by Hobby Hobbit

[BuddhistPunk]

 

On 10/11/2023 at 5:42 PM, Audrey Astor said:

 I think sometimes it’s just that newer folks don’t know how to open the ads to read the details of availability etc. I wish we could do a tutorial. 

I wish there was.  I still haven't taken the first step yet.  It can be intimidating.  I believe a lot of newer folks might not understand much about providers.  Logically they have the same commitments as anyone.  Maybe not doing an introduction is simply thinking they are respecting time and getting straight to the point, or don't think the providers wants those details.  Short notice is just an asshole that doesn't respect someone's time (doesn't apply to an already established relationship where that is agreed upon).  I know from my view, there is a lot to take in and the nature of it doesn't make it easy to get good answers.  I know I am concerned with my safety, not offending a provider as well as not wasting their time.  I read the whole ad or website if avail, but there are some that don't give too much info.

[sb1212]

On 10/18/2023 at 1:03 AM, BuddhistPunk said:

 

I wish there was.  I still haven't taken the first step yet.  It can be intimidating.  I believe a lot of newer folks might not understand much about providers.  Logically they have the same commitments as anyone.  Maybe not doing an introduction is simply thinking they are respecting time and getting straight to the point, or don't think the providers wants those details.  Short notice is just an asshole that doesn't respect someone's time (doesn't apply to an already established relationship where that is agreed upon).  I know from my view, there is a lot to take in and the nature of it doesn't make it easy to get good answers.  I know I am concerned with my safety, not offending a provider as well as not wasting their time.  I read the whole ad or website if avail, but there are some that don't give too much info.

Lots of posts out there on how to effectively and efficiently engage with a provider.  Here are some suggestions based on years of successful hobbying:

1. Do your research before reaching out to a companion. Reviews, TOB 411 forum, her website, TER, P411, DM to other hobbyists. Can't find enough data to make you comfortable? Either take a chance or move on. Lots of choices out there. Something for everyone. 

2. Reach out in the manner SHE prefers (email, text, phone). 

3. Follow her screening requirements carefully. Don't want to provide the info she requests? Move on. Don't try to harass her into changing her process for you. 

4. In your first communication, be polite and complete.  "Hi, Bambi - your pics and reviews tell a great story. I am interested in a 90 min incall on Thursday this week at 7:00 PM or 9:00 PM. Friday also works. Here is the screening info you asked for: xxx  xxxxx xxxxx. I have also shared my TOB references with you. Can you please confirm your donation? I look forward to hearing from you! THANKS  - Mike"

5. Follow through.  Don't go through the process unless you are serious about scheduling.

6. Go have fun! Rinse and repeat.

Does this work 100% of the time? No, but damn near. 

 

[Just Plain Joe]

I always try to schedule a few days ahead and that works 99% of the time.  However, there are occasions when I've driven an hour for an appointment only to be cancelled on at the last minute. (No problem, life happens.)  There have been such times when I've tried to find a last-minute replacement using the "Available Now" section of P411.  Unfortunately, I often find that "Available Now" often means "Available in 4 hours".  In other words, there are times when we really do want an appointment ASAP, which on the surface may seem unreasonable.  Once the "launch sequence is activated", we may not be thinking with the right head at that point. 

[BuddhistPunk]

On 10/20/2023 at 8:43 PM, Just Plain Joe said:

On 10/19/2023 at 9:11 PM, sb1212 said:

Lots of posts out there on how to effectively and efficiently engage with a provider.  Here are some suggestions based on years of successful hobbying:

1. Do your research before reaching out to a companion. Reviews, TOB 411 forum, her website, TER, P411, DM to other hobbyists. Can't find enough data to make you comfortable? Either take a chance or move on. Lots of choices out there. Something for everyone. 

2. Reach out in the manner SHE prefers (email, text, phone). 

3. Follow her screening requirements carefully. Don't want to provide the info she requests? Move on. Don't try to harass her into changing her process for you. 

4. In your first communication, be polite and complete.  "Hi, Bambi - your pics and reviews tell a great story. I am interested in a 90 min incall on Thursday this week at 7:00 PM or 9:00 PM. Friday also works. Here is the screening info you asked for: xxx  xxxxx xxxxx. I have also shared my TOB references with you. Can you please confirm your donation? I look forward to hearing from you! THANKS  - Mike"

5. Follow through.  Don't go through the process unless you are serious about scheduling.

6. Go have fun! Rinse and repeat.

Does this work 100% of the time? No, but damn near. 

 

Thanks for the info.  I guess the references are what gets me hung up.  Not sure if p411 is still the best route or not.  Though I don't mind giving info for a screening after I've done my research.

 

Edited October 26, 2023 by BuddhistPunk

[sparkey600]

On 10/17/2023 at 9:45 AM, Hobby Hobbit said:

I'm sorry, beautiful Calisurfgirl but I'm not sure I'm tracking so here are my thoughts.

The knights boiling it down to "NO LAST MINUTE APPOINTMENTS" got you all fucked up. 

Shoving the mutual requirement of respect and consideration that is also frequently ignored by too many providers aside reveals the elephant in the room. Some of y'all have been taught to expect too much from hobbyists, the relationship with which is or, knighthood aside , should be, more transactional than emotional. Yeah, yeah, yeah feelers but, can you imagine having to walk into a "business", any business, with the expectation the provider's needs come before your own? (Looking around) Aren't I the reason your bell rang??

But no. Like some weird dating or relationship game of Charades, there's this artificially high expectation of respect, personability, consideration, sensitivity, (insert higher level human emotion here) toward providers that doesn't resonate with the business side of this which, at least for the hobbyist, more often than not simply requires receiving the satisfaction, be it giving or receiving, they hope for. Period.

Of course, that one hobbyist's definition of total satisfaction may be one or a combination of a QV/HH/HR/DAY/WEEK long session of DFK, FIV, BBBJ, CIM, Greek...DATY, insert activity here, doesn't mean it's on the menu makes encounters YMMV, a-la-carte, by definition, right?! But in a world where reviews may or may not be useful, the nature of the business not only forbids explicitness in advertising, depending on the provider, the "right" approach may be, "Hi my name is Hobby Hobbit and I work at Acme Products" so "don't ask details" but "give me ample notice"...be ever proper but then, ever bothered, others prefer a short, sweet, ready now approach, only?! And I just spotted another elephant.

Not to judge but, you're OUTCALL only which requires that you are amenable to your client's venue/schedule to satisfy your business objectives. You have no website or other listing to reference, and there is no mention of what the proper approach for you is in your listing. So taken by your beauty, what do you want the fella with the fleeting impulse of a hard dick and a pocket (or two) full of disposable income with a small window to stick it in to do but ask what may actually be that stupid question, simply because the alignment of Venus and Mars is off at the moment? Ask it? Or move on? So many choices, so little time.

Long story short, the importance of clear expectations and the understanding of mutual limitations on both sides cannot be overstated.

Does anyone actually read a post this long without nodding off? Me, nope.

[Hobby Hobbit -Banned]

8 hours ago, sparkey600 said:

Does anyone actually read a post this long without nodding off? Me, nope.

Betting you read every comma and period because hater, the Hobbit's surprised you read at all, and doubts you made it past fifth grade. You strike me as a straight up cuck https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/cuck/.

Edited December 10, 2023 by Hobby Hobbit

[Savoir Faire]

7 hours ago, Hobby Hobbit said:

Betting you read every comma and period because hater, the Hobbit's surprised you read at all, and doubts you made it past fifth grade. You strike me as a straight up cuck https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/cuck/.

LOL @ this reminding me of a straight up cuck that use to cook me breakfast while I played with his wife in the bedroom. Thanks for the memory, that was some funny shit...................squeezing syrup and Savior Butter all over her ass for him to clean up......................

[Bit Banger]

On 10/15/2023 at 1:50 AM, sparkey600 said:

Personally, I think it's an over well lack of respect most people have now days. We are no longer in the universe, we are now in the "me niverse" 

…

Then again I get most of it. Kids are staying with their parents well into their 30's. They are coddled "Stay her until you can afford to move out" Really, did anyone of us hear this? Nope, not any way! We got "when are you going to move out?" …. 

Living in the South and largely Mexican culture, I find manners are still in place, thankfully. Having gone to a military academy, I had them forcefully instilled.

My 1st pass through college I shared an ‘on campus’ apartment with my father. When I flunked out, he demanded 1/2 the rent and a bag (brown paper sack) of groceries every week. No free ride.  Shortly thereafter I was wearing Army green.😁

[Bit Banger]

I think two factors are at play here:

1) The hobby has evolved.  When I started most appointments were immediate, either picked up on a street corner or bar, or travel time based on a phone call to an ad in the paper (RMN, Post, Westword, Reader, etc.). Now with Internet booking, we expect advance appointments.

2) We are in a generational transition where the new players are still learning the ropes.

[Hobby Hobbit -Banned]

14 hours ago, Savoir Faire said:

LOL @ this reminding me of a straight up cuck that use to cook me breakfast while I played with his wife in the bedroom. Thanks for the memory, that was some funny shit...................squeezing syrup and Savior Butter all over her ass for him to clean up......................

Was he a french maid, bonnet, butt plug under the thong wearing cuck?! Like Sparkles?!

[Hobby Hobbit -Banned]

On 12/10/2023 at 3:04 PM, Hobby Hobbit said:

Betting you read every comma and period because hater, the Hobbit's surprised you read at all, and doubts you made it past fifth grade. You strike me as a straight up cuck https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/cuck/.

@sparkey600 - I had a hunch about you and guess what?

Not just that.

With the Flesch-Kincaid method being the most commonly used, did you know most newspapers and periodicals are written at the 8th grade level? True story. Yet, follow the link below for an analysis of this post:

On 10/15/2023 at 6:50 AM, sparkey600 said:

Personally, I think it's an over well lack of respect most people have now days. We are no longer in the universe, we are now in the "me niverse" 

Everyone seems to think their wishes should come first, respect and manners come second with these people. Makes me wonder what's going on with society....

Then again I get most of it. Kids are staying with their parents well into their 30's. They are coddled "Stay her until you can afford to move out" Really, did anyone of us hear this? Nope, not any way! We got "when are you going to move out?" To this conversation, I think most people wanting or looking for an ASP are now "spoiled" looking for an instant gratification, rather than a relationship with a caring provider. Most of us a little bit older people were more than glad to move out of our house, so we could be out from under our parent's thumb. Not now. "we cant afford o be on our own" We have car payments, student debt, etc.....The next generation has no manners, has no sense of of self reliance and it makes me sick. Rant over. Please go ahead and go about your normal business. 

https://drive.proton.me/urls/2MK0KQ4TXG#UWENiZ2Wav8X

Not quite there huh?! No wonder you're confused!!

[Savoir Faire]

On 12/11/2023 at 7:04 AM, Hobby Hobbit said:

Was he a french maid, bonnet, butt plug under the thong wearing cuck?! Like Sparkles?!

Negative, he wasn't any of those things. He actually was a 6'4 professional and intelligent CEO who had a beautiful wife and a kink that involved enjoying other men giving it to his wife............................... I do not agree with your opinion of Spark E. Is he sensitive, YES, is he protective of his wife, YES and in my opinion he likes PUSSY as well. I know a lot of CUCKS and in my opinion, he doesn't fit the CUCK description...................

[Hobby Hobbit -Banned]

9 hours ago, Savoir Faire said:

Negative, he wasn't any of those things. He actually was a 6'4 professional and intelligent CEO who had a beautiful wife and a kink that involved enjoying other men giving it to his wife............................... I do not agree with your opinion of Spark E. Is he sensitive, YES, is he protective of his wife, YES and in my opinion he likes PUSSY as well. I know a lot of CUCKS and in my opinion, he doesn't fit the CUCK description...................

Yeah, well. Good for you and Sparkles.

Presumably we are all here for the love of pussy. And what man doesn't protect his wife? What are you referring to?

[Bootsce]

I think the troll wishes he was a cuck. At least that way his wife would be getting some…

More silly BS an half wit. 
 

Step off troll we all know you’re half a man. 
 

Merry Christmas you all I’m off to the Bahamas for a few months!

Looking forward to reading the troll’s impotent ramblings in March

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

I’ve never been given a free ride, either. Once I graduated from college a lifetime ago. I already had my first child the year before graduation. I was living in the four corners area. Life was tranquil, and my mind in a million years would not be thinking about this line of work. Yet, here I am. 😁

I don’t think there’s going to be a way for men to completely understand what we go through with what we do. And what it takes to survive.in this business. I agree respect should be mutual. However, that becomes difficult to understand when one side has not been shown respect often enough in this business. Maybe in your next lifetime, your human soul will desire to become a dainty young intelligent woman to experience a new angle on life?! Also, if you can imagine the most beautiful woman on the board coming back to earth as a total meathead? Possibly then you can understand what we go through and why we conduct ourselves the way we do.

   No,  you don’t need to believe in reincarnation. Yet, for me this belief allows me to see life from all angles. I just thought it might be interesting to consider and think about while trying hard to create greater division in your mind and on here. I rather find common understanding.

[Hobby Hobbit -Banned]

2 hours ago, Kali Sensual Reiki said:

I’ve never been given a free ride, either. Once I graduated from college a lifetime ago. I already had my first child the year before graduation. I was living in the four corners area. Life was tranquil, and my mind in a million years would not be thinking about this line of work. Yet, here I am. 😁

I don’t think there’s going to be a way for men to completely understand what we go through with what we do. And what it takes to survive.in this business. I agree respect should be mutual. However, that becomes difficult to understand when one side has not been shown respect often enough in this business. Maybe in your next lifetime, your human soul will desire to become a dainty young intelligent woman to experience a new angle on life?! Also, if you can imagine the most beautiful woman on the board coming back to earth as a total meathead? Possibly then you can understand what we go through and why we conduct ourselves the way we do.

   No,  you don’t need to believe in reincarnation. Yet, for me this belief allows me to see life from all angles. I just thought it might be interesting to consider and think about while trying hard to create greater division in your mind and on here. I rather find common understanding.

Whose mind is that? Suspecting mine, firstly the chronology of this discussion reveals the great divider firstly. Next, you seem to have particular difficulty grasping rhis - what you think about my perspective is your problem, not mine, so miss me with the unicorns and rainbows bullshit. Depending on the mindset, you're easily just as divisive.

[Imyrhklbry]

Bottom line for the numbnut, meathead, dumbass hobbyists out there, reading this !   Show the ladies gentlemanly respect and follow their rules !!! Very simple!! 

Otherwise use your fist , as majority of non-compliant morons do!! 

[Hobby Hobbit -Banned]

10 hours ago, Bootsce said:

I think the troll wishes he was a cuck. At least that way his wife would be getting some…

More silly BS an half wit. 
 

Step off troll we all know you’re half a man. 
 

Merry Christmas you all I’m off to the Bahamas for a few months!

Looking forward to reading the troll’s impotent ramblings in March

Speaking of bullshit, it's Bootshit! Hey Bootshit!

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

11 hours ago, Bootsce said:

I think the troll wishes he was a cuck. At least that way his wife would be getting some…

More silly BS an half wit. 
 

Step off troll we all know you’re half a man. 
 

Merry Christmas you all I’m off to the Bahamas for a few months!

Looking forward to reading the troll’s impotent ramblings in March

We are all envious of your tropical trip to paradise! Enjoy the beautiful beaches and sunshine for us all stuck in the cold! 

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

On 10/25/2023 at 6:50 PM, BuddhistPunk said:

 

P411 is a great website but definitely not necessary! 

[sparkey600]

On 12/10/2023 at 8:04 AM, Hobby Hobbit said:

Betting you read every comma and period because hater, the Hobbit's surprised you read at all, and doubts you made it past fifth grade. You strike me as a straight up cuck https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/cuck/.

You now sound to me like someone who wants me to explain certain things to you in a way that would mean we would have to meet on a personal basis.

Offering to buy you lunch anywhere you'd like to meet me

Name the place an the time and I will meet you for lunch. 

Offering to meet face to face to put you allegation's to bed. Hit me up! Looking forward to meeting you to put all of you're transgressions about me to bed!

I'm guessing a big fat NO here. So go along Junior, keep selling your BS to anyone that might listen. I'll give you this. If you ever dis my wife or my relationship with her, I will take it personally and you might wish to rethink your foul posts.  
Lunch? I'd love to meet you!

 

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

44 minutes ago, sparkey600 said:

You now sound to me like someone who wants me to explain certain things to you in a way that would mean we would have to meet on a personal basis.

Offering to buy you lunch anywhere you'd like to meet me

Name the place an the time and I will meet you for lunch. 

Offering to meet face to face to put you allegation's to bed. Hit me up! Looking forward to meeting you to put all of you're transgressions about me to bed!

I'm guessing a big fat NO here. So go along Junior, keep selling your BS to anyone that might listen. I'll give you this. If you ever dis my wife or my relationship with her, I will take it personally and you might wish to rethink your foul posts.  
Lunch? I'd love to meet you!

 

Heck if you meet him close to my place? I might want to join in I don’t need lunch. @sparkey600 Just curious!