Calisurfgirl

Established or "seasoned" hobbyists are accustom to a standard of conversation "etiquette" between interested party (them) seeking the company with a provider they have expressed interest in. Respectful hobbyists are aware that most providers are not sitting by the phone already showered, cosmetics applied, perfumed, with legs crossed heels on when they (hobbyists) text, call or email a provider. They understand we (providers) have a plethora of circumstances, situations, variables or in lamiens terms "life" continuously happening as well. Maybe this is because we are a business not a product. Why then the nuance or trend to have hobbyists not all but more than a few. Texting short prompts not inquiring but instead"rates?, deposit?, and there personal needs. Receiving points for punctuation, this being the only positive I can render from above example. Most living in modern society make allowances for everyday introductions. Hello, My name is _______ , etc. Providers are not listed items on a menu "al a carte" to have delivered like an Amazon prime purchase. Each provider has there means of verification which creates independent providers a level of comfort when scheduling with a new hobbyist or an ATF hobbyist , disclosing intimate details is not a minor task for us. It may seem to some hobbyists that providers are being difficult or requesting to much. I ask you then to contemplate for a moment. If I (hobbyist) were receiving inquiries requiring responses about personal and/or intimate details, or were driving to a unfamiliar location (private residence or hotel) to meet a person whom you had never met. What would your requirements be to achieve a required level of security and comfort. Curiosity should not lack anyone's ability to be courteous and respectful.

“The Rose Colored Glasses” I understand the concept with my own contribution to the survival of the fittest or the phrase I have in quotes above with absolute certainty. I may even have the shoe tread left on me from getting walkover. I take accountability for sure. I allowed whatever to happen, happen. What you unlined survival of the fittest. See my exes are doing just that surviving not actual living. There is a reason why even though the lion is consider to be the alpha of all alpha not because they hunt. No, male lions don’t but because they can procreate and create life. Not care for it. If we were to actually live like that of a lion most men wouldn’t survive long enough to have that luscious mane and a pride to look after if we were Lions. You might and a hand full of others . Most women would not be able to either. I am a millennial I think through the day when observing random asinine things my generation does without reason or worry of consequence, pondering are you that person who had their exhausted parent drag them out of the pool while it is lightning or wrangled the metal fork from there small toddler hand while it was approaching the inside of a plugged in toaster. Lol

I guess, actually I am guilty of being a romantic. I now believe that Walt Disney and his “happy ever after” is a recipe for disaster, that all little girls at some point and degree have fantasized about. As adults it is truly rooted within our subconscious as we try to navigate through life. Stumbling into relationships whether they are fleeting or arguably comparable to the NYC marathon. In either instance we fall, believing up until injury that we believe we are well aware and cautious while we trek within new terrain. When the relationship ends we look back and see the entirety the full scope, whether the time you spent with the other person was only seconds, minutes, months and/or years Riddled with numerous warning signs but we all avoid them because of one word… HOPE , hope of achieving that “Happy Ever After”. My question is why do we all believe in Walt Disney scenarios when we stop believing in the tooth fairy, Santa Claus and the Easter bunny? I would love to hear your opinion upon the subject?

To be honest I am my own worst enemy a majority of the time. I do not have easily diagnosed issues that can be with hard work remedied, I am not fighting demons like addiction or daddy issues. I fight against logical reason and the generated, almost constant value that other individuals express. Silence to most is the loudest enemy. Myself, on the other hand find it to be "my happy place". To retreat within the catacombs of my mind is great, unfortunately I am by definition analytical so by comparison my mind works like the game Tetris.

I prefer the word adversary. Adversary comes from Latin advertere, meaning "to turn toward." Because if your my opponent that would state you could possibly be a worthy opponent. At the very least the time required to participate would either entertain or educate me either way I prefer to tackle any given task or person directly, without distraction. Intelligence is a far greater weapon when you find respect not just for the action but also for your competitor.

I would love to draft and outline a probationary format and/or propose some ideas that I would be advantageous to both sides of the "coin". I use that term as an analogy to describe hobbyist and providers. A US quarter has one side with the portrait of our first president, George Washington. Which if it were a coin toss would be recognized as "heads".. The other side of the clad coated, copper and nickel mixed coin is a landscape or image that depicts a staple, commemoration of American history. The opposite side of ridged/grooved edged coin is known to all as "tails". Both are equal except in weight, both a polar, opposite but necessity, indispensable to generate a Quarter. So we all do respect, a provider is not to be viewed or stereotyped as beneath, weaker, subservient too. I ask this following question to persons that contact myself, who are less than cordial. "Do you know the first rule of negotiation"? (I wait for the persons response) Then I ask if they would like to know the answer. The answer is, "Whoever speaks first has the disadvantage". Then I follow up with a final question. "Did I contact you first" ? --------------------------------- (the moment of silence, followed by the vivid realization , OMG the epiphany, ). She, I, softly speak. Thank you, once again for your inquiry. (Now the curtains fall, the room darkens lol, and scene LOL) I provide adequate time for them to absorb what just happened. Lastly state, please call me when you are ready to actively participate/utilize what you had just learned. Intelligence, beauty and my classic Ray-Ban Glasses don't hurt either. Have been told within my career field of study that nothing is sexier.

Thank you, your observation and reply are appreciated. Great minds think alike. Because if the Ritz-Carlton is evaluating set terms, a standard above most it should actuallyprovide services to those whom wish to stay there, seamlessly every time. Continuing with this analogy. The Ritz-Carlton receives their guests without hiccups, the photographs of their rooms are updated, and accurate, they're linen is crisp, clean, and thread count is impeccable. The conversation is intelligent and compliments the ambiance That is why you do not see gangbangers staying at the Ritz-Carlton unless they have a premium recording contract producing platinum albums. In reply to Mr Pink, I stated, "I can't speak for other providers but I will speak for myself". I wish we could play Never Have I Ever. If we could, I would say with confidence never have I ever canceled an appointment when someone was on their way. Never have I ever been sitting in a bathroom flicking a lighter, behaving unstable. Never have I ever disrespected the person that was so interested in scheduling with me. I would not mind rendering compensation to the Ritz-Carlton. I found it ironic and amusing the use of doctor's office anology, most hobbyist the very least those that have either inquired or scheduled with myself know my career path away from this site or hobby. As frustrated as I am, knowing the investment. That hobbys and trends are generally temporary. Provided a ear to ear grin 😁 on my face which is actually me. No need to email Nev from the popular show on MTV, "catfish".

Mr Pink , I always enjoy our banter throughout the course of my attendance and active participation on this board. I applaud you, because at least you are genuine and authentic you don't skate around your own opinion. But both of the analogies was to maybe put in perspective without offending a provider or providers actually or hobbyist, guests that are perusing the site. To accommodate the rules and guidelines that we as Community must follow while on the site. The "hobbyist", have more generosity with what they are allowed to ask and or state within the parameters of the site as we all well know. Even though it's not your exchange of funds that's required on the site that is reserved for the "provider." I'm not going on a rant, or a tangent. I'm just frustrated. Also it is very easy to discern that analogy both of them Priceline would be considered this site lodging would be considered the activities that the site is home too. The hotels are considered to be the providers listing on this site myself included. But as a gentleman the other hobbyist so eloquently stated when replying to this topic if the Ritz-Carlton provides absolute Ritz-Carlton the entire time from the initial contact to the conclusion of that session seamlessly. Meaning the ambiance, the details, the conversation, the companionship, that includes hygiene, Etc. And the photographs like that of Priceline actually 100% render the person on the other side of the door that you are going to see. The reviews may even understate how great of an experience the Ritz-Carlton is. That's what I'm saying. Just because an individual contacts a provider and they say this, " U AVAILABLE, or 🌹 ROSES?" Does not mean that provider or let's go back to the analogy the Ritz-Carlton does not answer the phone or speak to a potential guest in that manner do they. In fact if you were to email the Ritz-Carlton about reservation they would say to you to please call about inquiry they'd have a better gauge or scope of what you would like your stay to be like because they're in the hospitality industry and they want to provide the very best service from start to finish I can't speak for all providers but I could speak for myself. So when you speak to somebody for 2 hours in the phone and engage in conversation with them and they render a time they would like to see you and you both agree upon that and you let them know no deposit required but if you do not show up and or have respect enough to reschedule when you do call you will be charged for the length of that actual appointment and when that person says haha not going to happen it's not okay because a small business of any size or any business for that matter starts with an individual it starts with a person unless providers are not people too do you understand I hope I made that clear without offending anybody or going against guidelines and hurting anybody's feelings because it's honest. The truth is not going to please everyone but it needs to be said and observed, at the very least respected.

Before deciding upon the title of this topic, I had to take several deep meditative breathes in through the nose and slowly exhaling, exiting the mouth. Repeating this several times until I grounded myself so I can respectfully inquire another providers perspective or that of the hobbyist. Question 1: As hobbyists when reaching out to, engaging and exchanging pleasantries, to expect the provider to accommodate the hobbyist because he is compartmentalize or generating unrealistic stereotypes? (Example Below) I will provide an analogy we can all understand to an extent or degree. If you are planning a trip to denver and are looking at accommodations on priceline and/or some other site that generates listing for lodging in the area. You see the Hyatt Regency in DTC with ⭐️⭐️⭐️, then the Motel 6 in lakewood with ⭐️ 1/2 stars, or lastly the Four Seasons Ritz-Carlton with ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ 1/2 is it fair to believe that yes they all provide lodging but is it fair to ask the Ritz-Carlton to accept the Motel 6 denomination. Question 2: Does the hobbyist believe that since he is recognized as the term used here and some other similar sites as "HOBBYIST" that we as providers see this as a hobby and not a means to take care of a plethora of everyday responsibilities like yourself? That the provider is filing a schedule C as an independent contractor or other related title used to describe a brand or business? (EXAMPLE BELOW) If I made an appointment at a trendy hair salon, after researching salons in the area if looked at criteria like who provided the best service that I particularly required , excellent reviews and generated amazing results providing a superb experience at the time of my intinal contact to the completion of appointment. But I as a patron understand that they are limited on time to see a person like additional employment/engagements outside of the salon but as a patron if I book an appointment and then unsuccessfully am unable to go for what ever reason. Do you know what happens? Ask your wife or girlfriend. They charge your for thr service because it is time the preserved for me a a patron and I failed to make it. That's business and they as a business have that right to do so. Because of the listed reasons I wanted them to provide services to my hair. This is why most require deposits because it is not a hobby to the provider. That is why a provider is not a hobbyist. The use and actual definition of either word honesty should not have to be rendered a requirement within TOB backpage, Tryst sites like that i could understand but not here of all places. Right!

Before deciding upon the title of this topic, I had to take several deep meditative breathes in through the nose and slowly exhaling, exiting the mouth. Repeating this several times until I grounded myself so I can respectfully inquire another providers perspective or that of the hobbyist. Question 1: As hobbyists when reaching out to, engaging and exchanging pleasantries, to expect the provider to accommodate the hobbyist because he is compartmentalize or generating unrealistic stereotypes? (Example Below) I will provide an analogy we can all understand to an extent or degree. If you are planning a trip to denver and are looking at accommodations on priceline and/or some other site that generates listing for lodging in the area. You see the Hyatt Regency in DTC with ⭐️⭐️⭐️, then the Motel 6 in lakewood with ⭐️ 1/2 stars, or lastly the Four Seasons Ritz-Carlton with ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ 1/2 is it fair to believe that yes they all provide lodging but is it fair to ask the Ritz-Carlton to accept the Motel 6 denomination. Question 2: Does the hobbyist believe that since he is recognized as the term used here and some other similar sites as "HOBBYIST" that we as providers see this as a hobby and not a means to take care of a plethora of everyday responsibilities like yourself? That the provider is filing a schedule C as an independent contractor or other related title used to describe a brand or business? (EXAMPLE BELOW) If I made an appointment at a trendy hair salon, after researching salons in the area if looked at criteria like who provided the best service that I particularly required , excellent reviews and generated amazing results providing a superb experience at the time of my intinal contact to the completion of appointment. But I as a patron understand that they are limited on time to see a person like additional employment/engagements outside of the salon but as a patron if I book an appointment and then unsuccessfully am unable to go for what ever reason. Do you know what happens? Ask your wife or girlfriend. They charge your for thr service because it is time the preserved for me a a patron and I failed to make it. That's business and they as a business have that right to do so. Because of the listed reasons I wanted them to provide services to my hair. This is why most require deposits because it is not a hobby to the provider. That is why a provider is not a hobbyist. The use and actual definition of either word honesty should not have to be rendered a requirement within TOB backpage, Tryst sites like that i could understand but not here of all places. Right!

I loved humeniplex it is the best board in Southern California.

I am so apologetic, about the situation you placed in by a person whom has zero home training, respect for himself let alone that of another person. Silly me, I believed that we had a least one communal understanding better all across this platform. That there service requested, a service desired to be met, or quintessentially an order to be filled. Some have this crazy concept that just because the provider is an individual that there company, time obtained is a casual act like tinder or bumble. When that concept is absent from actual truth. My dating profile does not have an EIN or has an itemized ledgers exceptions for annual, required tax purposes.

Very informative topic, I couldn't agree more. Interesting for unfortunately a majority of persons whom may or may not be members on this site or others similar, have the impression that all providers are carbon copies of each other. That we as a collective are lying back on pillows throughout the day. Just waiting for the phone to vibrate or ring. Or the latter the hobbyist that presumes to negotiate, providing the narrative and details through the inital text (like we do not have a choice), the absolute worst scenario is to believe that a hobbyist position puts the provider at a disavantage. Well, this maybe redundant for those providers and/or hobbyists having additional private, advanced education. While in the pursuit, initial stages of negotiations, the first person to speak (talk), has already lost. Now this in the space of the site would be when a provider recieves correspondence, inquiry rom the hobbyist. So the advantage, choice to engage will always be contigent upon the provider. Sometimes the conditions, motives an individual has to pursue a path as a provider, is one to compliment the progressive interest alloted to there secondary, advanced education, actual career path. Separate, from the hobby. Duh!!

Notably, we learn that we have 5 senses. Those being.. Taste, Touch, Sight, Sound, Smell. There should actually be an additional sense, that many do not have, "common sense". I have read numerous hobbyist contributions to the forums, regarding this generalize question or topic related question. " Who or where are the providers that do not rush appointments, adhere to the scheduled appointment times, value and respect the hobbyist time". or "I want a provider that wishes to establish chemistry, to mutually feel comfortable since we are about to embark upon intimate discussion, quality contributed to the time and the "taboo" of this particular requested, desired situation." Usually a combination of both, give or take. "WE" do exist! This aggravates me as a provider who encompasses the bounty of their requests. Not all providers are heathens, with the intent to have a turnstile within their confines. So to answer your question hobbyist, like I have stated numerous times within the forum if you are looking to buy an new Audi or better yet a Telsa on Colfax it is not going to happen. Common Sense. I wouldn't want to lose my ability to discern rational and logical thinking. I would want to lose any of the 5 senses listed above , before that happens, God Willing.

It honestly would be based not just on chemistry between myself and the hobbyist but also for me an ATF would have be respectful, not a client that when given the do's and don'ts either disregards or becomes absent minded of the conversation we had prior to meeting. They would have great hygiene, consinious to the intimacy that meeting anyone on or off the site would entail. Attractive to be honest, you can be "blessed" with some horsepower under the hood (if you know what I mean, lol) but look like you rolled out of bed and thought I am going to log on and expect the provider to look like this, provide this for this length, etc. etc. and not even try to meet the expectations you placed on the provider you wish to schedule or engage with. Conversation that is other than provocative is a plus, because a large majority of providers also want to enjoy the time you spend with them as well. With that all being said I have 2 ATF Hobbyist I have seen and would amicably engage with them outside of the nature of this hobby as friends, enjoying a baseball game or casual dinner.