An Actual Connection?!?

[jaski111]

Question to providers... I recently had the most amazing connection.

How often do you have that OMG moment when there is $$$ involved? Just curious as this was not something I was expecting.

Don't get me wrong it is amazing and we are already going to see each other again but unexpected.

If you don't feel like posting here please PM me. Thank you anyone/everyone who chimes in.

[ironman318]

Don’t wish it away, but don’t look at it like it’s forever.

[jaski111]

6 hours ago, ironman318 said:

Don’t wish it away, but don’t look at it like it’s forever.

Don't get me wrong I'm not looking at it like that but it truly took me by surprise.

I've meet some amazing ladies so far and had some amazing experiences but this was something different. Cant even describe it, but unlike my previous encounters it just felt deeper,.  And yes I know a great provider will do that.

But since I am fairly new to this I just wanted to see if and how often people make a deeper connection that is actually mutual.

[Just Jos]

I think I connect with the majority of ppl who come see me. It is our job to find common ground. It is also our job to make this feel like it’s not a service but it is the customers job to remember that it is. Can’t count how many clients I’ve had to fire that I genuinely liked Bc they assumed since we connected, they were entitled to more. Just be careful. It’s a slippery slope. 💋

[Phil-anderer]

1 hour ago, Just Jos said:

I think I connect with the majority of ppl who come see me. It is our job to find common ground. It is also our job to make this feel like it’s not a service but it is the customers job to remember that it is. Can’t count how many clients I’ve had to fire that I genuinely liked Bc they assumed since we connected, they were entitled to more. Just be careful. It’s a slippery slope. 💋

Yes, I think you do as well.  So where will our honeymoon be??  mwahahaha

[Hunter VanDyke]

Speaking for myself, the goal is to make that connection with ALL of my clients. It's why I prefer screening with references, and getting additional information about what you are like.  It's also why I like bios on p411. It's why I choose to see less gentleman, and prefer 90min minimums. It's all about the connection, and making sure we have the highest probability of making a great connection.  

[Bit Banger]

1 hour ago, Hunter VanDyke said:

Speaking for myself, the goal is to make that connection with ALL of my clients. It's why I prefer screening with references, and getting additional information about what you are like.  It's also why I like bios on p411. It's why I choose to see less gentleman, and prefer 90min minimums. It's all about the connection, and making sure we have the highest probability of making a great connection.  

That works both ways!

I’m selective on who I call.  I prefer longer appointments, usually including a meal w/plenty of time for conversation.  If you’re on P411, it’s important that you check my bio.

That elusive connection is sometimes more important to me than the sexual release.  BUT! That does not entitle either of us to extras, though it might incline both of us to less structured options (dinner dates instead of 1hr straight up BCD).

[Hunter VanDyke]

15 minutes ago, Bit Banger said:

That works both ways!

I’m selective on who I call.  I prefer longer appointments, usually including a meal w/plenty of time for conversation.  If you’re on P411, it’s important that you check my bio.

That elusive connection is sometimes more important to me than the sexual release.  BUT! That does not entitle either of us to extras, though it might incline both of us to less structured options (dinner dates instead of 1hr straight up BCD).

Yes, it takes a great client and great provider to go above and beyond for the best chance to make a wonderful connection. 💙💙💙

[jaski111]

13 minutes ago, Bit Banger said:

That works both ways!

I’m selective on who I call.  I prefer longer appointments, usually including a meal w/plenty of time for conversation.  If you’re on P411, it’s important that you check my bio.

That elusive connection is sometimes more important to me than the sexual release.  BUT! That does not entitle either of us to extras, though it might incline both of us to less structured options (dinner dates instead of 1hr straight up BCD).

Totally Agree about being selective. At first I felt like a kid in a candy store and there are SOOO many wonderful types and sizes of candy to choose. :-)

But quickly realized that it was quality that I was craving. That's what make this connection so extra special.

And we did connect through P411 she even mentioned my profile was a big part of the reason she even saw me.

[Bit Banger]

Jaski, only 7 posts but you handled this like an old hand. 👍

[Alex Majors]

If you dig long enough, you might find that rare gem. Everything clicks just right. But just remember "It is a business, doing pleasure with the ladies"  Keep it mutually beneficial and it won't hurt as much, when she disappears off the radar.

[Seeker5280]

I must say that sometimes I fell there is a “connection” during a session.

Thats great for the moment. 
 

After a client leaves,  The reality sets in for both parties.

The “connection” goes away. Period!

 Guys want to hold on to the memory forever. Great, hold on to the memory.

The provider keeps moving forward with their own agenda. 
They may never think of the time we shared. 
 

I understand this!
 

This is not rocket science.

 

[Old_Timer]

When you put two people behind closed doors, anything can happen.

 

[pfunk]

2 hours ago, Old_Timer said:

When you put two people behind closed doors, anything can happen.

I agree. However, I been doing this for more than 35 years, and a real, mutual, connection has only happened once. (The type where we both want to see each other A LOT, regardless of funds). However, I have made lots of friends I like to visit, and who claimed to enjoy my visits (mostly paid). 

[Laci French]

We all are human and that magical connection can happen.  Enjoy every moment and keep it in perspective and it can be a beautiful friendship.

That's the golden stuff😊

[hornyoldtoad]

if you are lucky enough to connect on some level, good on ya!  it makes the experience worth repeating and ultimately so much more fun...

if you don't, its just 3G...

imo...

 

[lustybustygina]

A  connection can go a long ways ,  and the more you meet with the love connection the more you will have a batter connection , I like love when  clients leave and say I will be back and they do the next day or  later that night ,

It's has happen more then a few times , 

[Bravo1]

I think it's great when you are so confortablevwith a provider that it feels special but...   at the end of the day, this is their business.  Respect, professionalism with some mutual fun but I would probably err on the side of not overthinking it or overanalyzing the connection. Enjoy your time together but don't start thinking of it becoming anything more than what it is. 

[Old_Timer]

I think once or twice is all anyone can expect for a unique relationship, given the circumstances -- we're set up to fail.

7 hours ago, pfunk said:

I agree. However, I been doing this for more than 35 years, and a real, mutual, connection has only happened once. (The type where we both want to see each other A LOT, regardless of funds). However, I have made lots of friends I like to visit, and who claimed to enjoy my visits (mostly paid). 

I'm glad for you, as I know what this can mean. And one or two were very special friendships, indeed that taught me much about friendship.¿

And yes, I was almost always the one who paid. Even if I didn't pay to sleep over, I bought dinner and drinks, paid the cab driver, or booked the room and ordered room service. But not always, and that's nice, too. Paying was never an issue; It's what men do. To get treated to a theater ticket, or invited to a mountain condo can feel better than scoring with a civilian.

[jaski111]

Thank you Jus, Hunter, Laci and Gina for your insight! Mad Respect and Mad Love for what you do! Be Safe Ladies!

Thank you everyone else. Really cool to hear everyone's experiences on this matter, not sure what this is or what kind of friendship this can involve into. But I will try to stay grounded . I will just enjoy the ride for whatever and however long this lasts.

~J

[mtnman]

On 4/30/2020 at 9:56 AM, Just Jos said:

 but it is the customers job to remember that it is. Can’t count how many clients I’ve had to fire that I genuinely liked Bc they assumed since we connected, they were entitled to more. Just be careful. It’s a slippery slope. 💋

Excellent, Excellent Post Jos, IMHO.

[Guest]

On 4/29/2020 at 3:48 PM, jaski111 said:

Question to providers... I recently had the most amazing connection.

How often do you have that OMG moment when there is $$$ involved? Just curious as this was not something I was expecting.

Don't get me wrong it is amazing and we are already going to see each other again but unexpected.

If you don't feel like posting here please PM me. Thank you anyone/everyone who chimes in.

You didn’t ask for my opinion and I’m obviously not a provider, but I thought I’d provide a perspective from the other side.  
 

So here it goes...  I genuinely fell in love and am currently I love with a provider.  I’d expect the first response or thought to be, “You’re in idiot, her job is to make you feel that way.”  We, you and I, didn’t expect to feel that way initially, but it happened, so here we are...  What’s happens next is the hard part and it’s going to crush you!  The boundary for us is sort of a moving target, we lay it all out on the line and expect that the feelings will be reciprocated.  At first they might be, but eventually you’re going to cross a boundary.  WHEN, not if, you cross that boundary, you’re going to be shocked at how quickly you’ll be forgotten.  The money train stops for nobody, not me, not you, nobody...  You’re going to wake up in the morning thinking about this person and they aren’t going to be there for you.  You’re going to lay in bed at night wishing they were there with you, but they won’t be.  Someone mentioned a slippery slope and that it is, it’s just far more slippery for you and I than it is for a provider, I think... 😬.  You’re not the first or last to have a connection...  I didn’t think I was capable of caring about someone this way, but I most certainly do and I was and am willing to risk quite a bit to see where it goes, but my fear, and reality, is that the person I feel this way about doesn’t share the same strength of feelings.  OR maybe they do, but I managed to screw it up.  
 

Anyhoo, didn’t mean to make it about me, just wanted to share the perspective from someone dealing with this currently.  
 

I hope it works out for both of us, but you’re going to have to have the fortitude (I didn’t) to know when you say goodbye.  And maybe goodbye isn’t forever, it’s just for now...  And keep your fingers off your phone and resist the urge to text too often, you’re phone is the devil!!!

[Gentleman47[Banned]]

I keep emotions out of it. I'm there to slam ass, go home, and not think about it again until I'm ready to slam ass again.

[Vassago]

I have to disagree. I do not see any realistic connection. It doesn't mean that your feelings aren't real. But it means that it is not realistic to have the kind of connection you are describing with a provider. I see only confusion, transaction and sex. I've learned to eliminate the confusion. I'll save my love for my family.

[Guest]

That moment you wish you didn’t type your first post. 🙄. 

[JRWolfe]

On 4/30/2020 at 9:56 AM, Just Jos said:

I think I connect with the majority of ppl who come see me. It is our job to find common ground. It is also our job to make this feel like it’s not a service but it is the customers job to remember that it is. Can’t count how many clients I’ve had to fire that I genuinely liked Bc they assumed since we connected, they were entitled to more. Just be careful. It’s a slippery slope. 💋

      Agree !  The relationship begins when the door opens and ends when the door closes. Both in this hobby and on porn sets. (from action to cut )  The tricky part is in making the second appointment ,sometimes a lady mistakes a friendly request for a similar appointment and/or as arm candy to an event as the client feeling they are entitled to more...when they aren't.  (example: I've hired arm candy for events,between having real life girlfriends,for decades ,its fun and ends when the evening is over )

With coronavirus making it difficult to make a living. I've reached out to offer ladies some regular work,but only one took me up on it. Putting much needed $$ into someones pocket during these stressful times doesn't mean I expect more, I don't. ( probably true of others ,this virus is a time to help,without strings )

[Just Jos]

@JRWolfe Hmmm sounds like you’re taking my lack of response to your last email a little personally Jr. My post wasn’t about you, however since were here, let’s talk it out. I had a really wonderful time when we met, I think you know that. But since that first meeting you have emailed me about a dozen times just wanting to check in. I’ve engaged in all of these emails minus the last 2 or so, Bc shit or get of the pot. You haven’t tried to set up an appointment w me. Your last email asked if I’d attend a concert/ event with you without any idea of when that might be Bc covid is running everything. And  Personally I’m trying to avoid big crowds/concerts and festivals  until there is a vaccine or we get a handle on this somehow. In fact, I bought tickets for 3 festivals for this summer which have all been canceled. So, I didn’t feel pressed to get back to that email. I’m sorry you thought this was about you. 

Edited May 4, 2020 by Just Jos
Words

[Just Jos]

On 5/3/2020 at 10:23 AM, Shyguy said:

You didn’t ask for my opinion and I’m obviously not a provider, but I thought I’d provide a perspective from the other side.  
 

So here it goes...  I genuinely fell in love and am currently I love with a provider.  I’d expect the first response or thought to be, “You’re in idiot, her job is to make you feel that way.”  We, you and I, didn’t expect to feel that way initially, but it happened, so here we are...  What’s happens next is the hard part and it’s going to crush you!  The boundary for us is sort of a moving target, we lay it all out on the line and expect that the feelings will be reciprocated.  At first they might be, but eventually you’re going to cross a boundary.  WHEN, not if, you cross that boundary, you’re going to be shocked at how quickly you’ll be forgotten.  The money train stops for nobody, not me, not you, nobody...  You’re going to wake up in the morning thinking about this person and they aren’t going to be there for you.  You’re going to lay in bed at night wishing they were there with you, but they won’t be.  Someone mentioned a slippery slope and that it is, it’s just far more slippery for you and I than it is for a provider, I think... 😬.  You’re not the first or last to have a connection...  I didn’t think I was capable of caring about someone this way, but I most certainly do and I was and am willing to risk quite a bit to see where it goes, but my fear, and reality, is that the person I feel this way about doesn’t share the same strength of feelings.  OR maybe they do, but I managed to screw it up.  
 

Anyhoo, didn’t mean to make it about me, just wanted to share the perspective from someone dealing with this currently.  
 

I hope it works out for both of us, but you’re going to have to have the fortitude (I didn’t) to know when you say goodbye.  And maybe goodbye isn’t forever, it’s just for now...  And keep your fingers off your phone and resist the urge to text too often, you’re phone is the devil!!!

This post has me wondering Bc most of my clients are attached... are you currently married shyguy? Are you even available to give love to someone else rn?? Cause I can only speak for me but I don’t want to date a married man unless it’s paid by the hour. 🤷🏽‍♀️ 

[JRWolfe]

8 minutes ago, Just Jos said:

@JRWolfe Hmmm sounds like you’re taking my lack of response to your last email a little personally Jr. My post wasn’t about you

      My response was not about you,it was about someone else entirely. (from last November ) You  just happened to post a subject that has confused me about Denver vs LA girls.

That said,those emails you mentioned were during a time of uncertainty involving my moms health. It was tough determining when to make a second appointment at that time and it was mentioned each time...I've  always considered communication key ,not blowing off any appointments,just that private life happened...You put it out that you would go to an event and I asked you which one you would like to go to. Since then,my mom died,all heck broke (best kept private)..and coronavirus reared its head and EVERY event that I was looking at...CANCLED..so it became a moot point. Right now,as this is typed.Every red carpet event,adult industry convention,concert,cruise etc has been canceled up to and in including January. (I get emailed press releases daily ) .

Due to my frail health ,with Coronavirus out there. Its best not to make appointments at this time. However, I did put it out there that if anyone needs to make money, I have non escort related jobs that I would gladly pay to anyone else that is taking a break and needs ready cash. So far,only one TOB girl and one TOB guy (an electrician ) responded and we wore masks and kept social distancing.

All that said,when things get back to normal.......

[Phil-anderer]

17 minutes ago, Just Jos said:

This post has me wondering Bc most of my clients are attached... are you currently married shyguy? Are you even available to give love to someone else rn?? Cause I can only speak for me but I don’t want to date a married man unless it’s paid by the hour. 🤷🏽‍♀️ 

I'm not attached, either, but I haven't seen anyone since you, I think.  I won't be for a while - not sure what the metric will be for me to see someone (dating or otherwise), but it hasn't happened yet.  I sure wish Covid would calm down.