Posted October 12, 2019 I didnt ghost you, you ghosted me! With technology advancing all the time we humans have gotten away from actually speaking to one another unless we are in person. I have read multiple times as well as heard people IRL talk about being ghosted. Recently, I thought I was being ghosted by everyone but turns out that my network carrier just wasnt letting any of my texts go through, and I'm still having that issue. Anyway the point is, how many of us actually take the time to understand why someone may not be texting us back, rather than just jumping to conclusions that, oh their an asshole, or he or she is just not interested etc. We all have things that happen; our phones are not working, we got busy, we are in the presence of company etc. So my advice to everyone is to try and be patient and do some OPV which means opposite person view. OPV can be helpful in soooo many situations and I intend to practice it more often. Have a fabulous weekend peeps! 12 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 13, 2019 Everyone expects to get instant replays these days. They get upset if you take what they consider too long, to get back. Who here remembers before the time of answering machines. The phone sat out in a family room, kitchen or bedroom. You had a 6 foot cord. If you weren"t home or if you were outside, people just called back. No problem. My sisters used to strech the kitchen phone , which had a 10 cord to another room and close the door. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 13, 2019 I had a experience like this several years ago. My phone died on a Saturday evening and although I went to the cell place on Sunday afternoon, they couldn't do anything till Monday. I had insurance on the thing, so they sent me a new one, which arrived on Wednesday. Once I got it up and running, I already had not so pretty messages from people who I thought were friends. When I explained what had happened, they were all like "Oh Sorry, I thought you were totally ignoring me on purpose" Yeah, ok!!! This was several years ago, so I can imagine it has only gotten worse! Instant acknowledgement or they are pissed!! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 13, 2019 8 hours ago, Crystyna said: With technology advancing all the time we humans have gotten away from actually speaking to one another unless we are in person. Well, not everybody ! I actually HATE texting, there are way fewer typos in talking . Yeah, I email and sometimes check in on my facebook page and private messages . But if I have a phone number ,would rather talk. Obviously business contracts and samples are best emailed...but texted...no thank you. (Probably why I don't have a smart phone ) 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 13, 2019 19 hours ago, Crystyna said: I didnt ghost you, you ghosted me! With technology advancing all the time we humans have gotten away from actually speaking to one another unless we are in person. I have read multiple times as well as heard people IRL talk about being ghosted. Recently, I thought I was being ghosted by everyone but turns out that my network carrier just wasnt letting any of my texts go through, and I'm still having that issue. Anyway the point is, how many of us actually take the time to understand why someone may not be texting us back, rather than just jumping to conclusions that, oh their an asshole, or he or she is just not interested etc. We all have things that happen; our phones are not working, we got busy, we are in the presence of company etc. So my advice to everyone is to try and be patient and do some OPV which means opposite person view. OPV can be helpful in soooo many situations and I intend to practice it more often. Have a fabulous weekend peeps! Many have become so dependent on our phones for a lot of reasons. When they work, I can take it for granted. When they don't work, it sucks (and not in the good way). Patience is important and I need to remember that "instant gratification" is not always required. Heck, I remember rotary dial phones, no voice mail, no call waiting and short cords. Now we walk around, connected to so many things because of technology. But sometimes those same devices can dis-connect us from some important things...like patience, kindness and understanding that relationships are more than just being connected via technology. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 13, 2019 14 hours ago, JRWolfe said: Well, not everybody ! I actually HATE texting, there are way fewer typos in talking . Yeah, I email and sometimes check in on my facebook page and private messages . But if I have a phone number ,would rather talk. Obviously business contracts and samples are best emailed...but texted...no thank you. (Probably why I don't have a smart phone ) 100% agree about talking .. I have every one call and if you can't oh well ! 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 13, 2019 I've done pretty well with texting. Haven't talked to many before an appointment. That being said, 'dead areas' can really be a bitch, which affects calls/texts. OF course... the effort is worth it. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 14, 2019 Talking just give a better feel of who someone is , But that's me 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 14, 2019 7 hours ago, lustybustygina said: 100% agree about talking .. I have every one call and if you can't oh well ! I absolutely dislike texting and it is what everyone else wants to do. Blah, it is a waste because most of the time my work phone is buried in the bottom of my purse. Auto response is sent and I look at my phone hours later when I can. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 14, 2019 (edited) 11 hours ago, Kandi Apple said: I absolutely dislike texting and it is what everyone else wants to do. Blah, it is a waste because most of the time my work phone is buried in the bottom of my purse. Auto response is sent and I look at my phone hours later when I can. Right I have a Auto Response if you text me and I send it out right away & most of time they are TW and don't Follow Through ! I fine when you call, you are more into following up and I get a better feel about you . But A PM or Email is better . Edited October 14, 2019 by lustybustygina 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 14, 2019 Grandkids are like, "phones are for talking? WTF" 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 14, 2019 On the topic of Ghosting, I feel its really common decency and mutual respect these days to *Eventually get back to someone in some form, Texting email calling message in a bottle LOL to explain what happened if plans went south, as long as the person did nothing wrong and really deserves an explanation. I try to make it a point to give everyone an explanation these days, even if its not what they want to hear. Honesty is good too (and I'm not just talking about the hobby). As a professional I think it's important to explain of course. And we're really lucky if someone has the common decency to not "ghost" for us too! In a psychology class I took, it just creates bad feelings for both parties if things go unresolved... 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 14, 2019 Oh yeah, and technology is not reliable. Wish we weren't so connected all the time..... 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 17, 2019 Texting premeet, she asks for a photo then says nothing. How is that good business? 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 17, 2019 On 13.10.2019 at 0:14 AM, Crystyna said: So my advice to everyone is to try and be patient and do some OPV which means opposite person view. OPV can be helpful in soooo many situations and I intend to practice it more often. Have a fabulous weekend peeps! I did just do some OPV - and guess what I came up with? If a person ghosts you, doesn't return your texts, claims family issues, phone died, no cell reception, whatever, that person is essentially telling you one thing: whatever it is you were discussing, planning, just wasn't that important to him/her. I mean, if Keanu Reeves were to text you, you'd fuckin' BUILD a cell tower to get back to him. So, enough with the bullshit excuses, just say you're not interested anymore and all is well. BTW, this is why a smart John has an expiration date built into his text: "If I don't hear back from you by, I'll assume you're no longer interested." 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 17, 2019 (edited) 27 minutes ago, Kishon said: Texting premeet, she asks for a photo then says nothing. How is that good business? You got your answer, she saw your ugly mug, and decided she's no longer interested. Every hooker has her pain point: How badly do I need this money for me to let this fat hairy ogre climb on top of me. Sort of what's going on in a girl's head before doing a scene with Ron Jeremy. Edited November 17, 2019 by 2Big 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 17, 2019 On 14.10.2019 at 6:33 AM, Kandi Apple said: I absolutely dislike texting and it is what everyone else wants to do. For me that's a good way to weed out the geriatrics. Doesn't matter whether it's paid poonani or Tinder - ya gotta be able to text and WhatsApp. I once communicated with this chick on OkCupid. She: I don't have a smart phone. Me: Wuuut??? How am I gonna send you dick pics? Print them out and mail them to you? Next! 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 17, 2019 We live in a society of instant gratification that has been enabled for 20+ years by ever faster technology. Now add in normally horny men, "sperm of the moment" clients, ladies with bills due, and a slow business time and patience often goes out the window. Certainly both innocent things and ghosting happen. One additional contributor is a weird reverse correlation. Technological advancement has greatly increased the speed of contact, but at the same time, legal regression has generally slowed the speed at which people can book and meet........that is certain to tax patience.... 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 17, 2019 (edited) 7 hours ago, Kishon said: Texting premeet, she asks for a photo then says nothing. How is that good business? Just got ghosted last night. Sent a pic like she asked. Made it to the predetermined location and on time. Sent a couple of texts and waited 15 mins. Never texted the room number. She went dark on me. Wasted an hour of my life total but saved my cash. Edited November 17, 2019 by Alex Majors 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 17, 2019 30 minutes ago, Alex Majors said: Just got ghosted last night. Sent a pic like she asked. Made it to the predetermined location and on time. Sent a couple of texts and waited 15 mins. Never texted the room number. She went dark on me. Wasted an hour of my life total but saved my cash. In Denver? The only reason I'm asking your location says KC. btw.....Did you fly the A6? 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 17, 2019 I was in KC. Nothing happening here. So I tag along. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 18, 2019 On 10/14/2019 at 11:15 AM, Leena_rose said: On the topic of Ghosting, I feel its really common decency and mutual respect these days to *Eventually get back to someone in some form, Texting email calling message in a bottle LOL to explain what happened if plans went south, Thank you. Believe it or not some of us dudes are actually concerned for your safety. When communication suddenly just stops for no apparent reason, it's not just the feeling of being rejected that sucks. It's a mixed emotional bag of concern, irritation and sadness. Just, tell me to fuck off and die. I can take it. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 18, 2019 21 hours ago, 2Big said: Every hooker has her pain point: How badly do I need this money for me to let this fat hairy ogre climb on top of me. Sort of what's going on in a girl's head before doing a scene with Ron Jeremy. I resemble that remark. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites