Here is a little hobby etiquette 101 for anyone who wants it. If you're a newbie, you need to read this

[Juanmotai]

Learn the Theory

You're not paying for sex; that's illegal, silly! And you're not "paying" either -- you're merely donatingfor their time and companionship -- that's perfectly legal. And if you two happen to spontaneously, consensually engage in sexual relations or any other activity -- irrespective, incidental, and independent of the initial transaction -- then that's perfectly legal (at least, in theory -- hence, the title). This theory is also the standard by which you evaluate what not to say/ask to a provider, e.g. "Here's my $300... btw, do you carry magnum condoms?" or by which you evaluate when to run, e.g. the provider asks, "Thank you for your payment...would you like me to start by sucking you off?" 

Know the theory and you'll have a solid foundation to be a savvy hobbyist.

Learn the Lexicon

Upon entering the hobby, you need to learn the language. The language is, at least in part, designed to guard both parties from online scrutiny under law enforcement. They're not called 'escorts' or 'prostitutes'; they're called providers. You're not called 'Johnnies', you're called hobbyists. When you write follow-up reviews on the boards (and any hobbyist worth his salt will write a decent review, every time -- it's disrespectful not to, even if you have negative comments), you'll be expected to avoid language whose plain meaning would be interpreted as evidencing illegal conduct. The hobby already has its euphemisms and acronyms in place for most 'situations', so you only need to look them up. Here's a sample lexicon with corresponding plain meaning language:

Bareback: Without a condom.
BBBJ: Bareback Blow Job, oral stimulation of the penis without a condom
BBBJTC: Bareback Blow Job To Completion, oral stimulation of the penis to orgasm without a condom. (May spit or swallow)
Birdwatcher: A provider who swallows, based on the euphemism that she 'watches the Swallows'.
CBJ: CBJ, Covered Blow Job, fellatio with a condom
CG: Cowgirl
CIM: Cum in mouth.
Clockwatcher: A term for a provider who counts the minutes until the session is over. Usually used to describe a provider who rushes and does not enjoy her work.
Completion: Orgasm. e.g. She gave a bareback blowjob to completion.
Cover: A condom
Covered: Various measures, such as the use of condoms or dental dams
DATO: Dining at the O, Anilingus, oral stimulation of the anus
DATY: Dining at the Y, Cunnilingus, oral stimulation of the vulva or clitoris
DFK: Deep French Kissing, kissing with tongue
Donation: Payment to a provider
Walking/Walked the dog: Doggy style
Enhancements: Breast implants
French: Oral sex, on either party
FS: Full Service, Vaginal intercourse to completion
GFE: Girl Friend Experience, A subjective term, but usually used as praise for a very passionate, sensual, non-mechanical experience. Most consider deep french kissing a baseline requirement for GFE.
Greek: Anal Sex
Hobby, The: The patronizing of prostitutes.
Hobbyist: A man who patronizes prostitutes.
Independent, Indie: An escort who works on her own, without an agency affiliation. The escort manages her own calls, bookings, advertising and finances
Interpreter: Condom (e.g. She spoke French without the aid of an interpreter = BBBJ)
Spinner: A very petite provider
TUMA: Tongue up my ass
YMMV: Your Mileage May Vary = Catch all phrase to remind that tastes differ, reviews are inherently subjective, and that providers have good and bad days, thus experiences vary.

Read reviews on your local provider boards, and you'll learn the lexicon. 


Before the Session

1) FFS, don't haggle with the provider on prices.

That is incredibly disrespectful and you'll be very very lucky not to get blacklisted by the provider and other providers. Providers tend to be a very tight-knit community and will alert each other on who to avoid (whether its because you're an assshole, have STIs/STDs, smell bad, or act like five-o) by reference to your name, phone number, email, and appearance. 

2) FFS, don't send dick pics to the provider.

Providers are just as concerned about getting busted as you are; by sending them any kind of lewd communication (whether in text or picture form) in advance, you lose all credibility. Have some fuucking common sense and civility; you're a gentleman and she is a lady -- act like so. 

3) FFS, don't send one-word or vague emails/text

Sending "Hi, I'm all oiled up and reddy 2 go!" is just going to give the provider a headache; she's running a business and doesn't need you wasting her time with hunky dory bullshiit like that. Just state your request and include 1) Your donation amount, 2) Date and time, e.g. "Hi, I've got $300 for you. This Wednesday at 5pm good? Here are my references (links to reviews/provider phone numbers). Thank you!" Providers will love you for keeping it straightforward and simple. 


During the Session

1) Pre-shower is generally standard operating procedure

Any provider worth her salt will require a pre-shower. Many will even join you for a little tease and soapy fun. Some will even wash your angusthoroughly -- I'm talking finger inserted 2/3rds in the way, for maximum freshness so she can tongue-fuuck your angus with reckless abandon. Regardless of how thoroughly you sanitized your balls and angus prior to arriving, take the damn shower -- it's standard procedure.

2) Be a respectful gentleman at all times.

Follow this principle, and you'll always be fine on your end of the bargain.

After the Session

1) Write a follow up review

Providers will always appreciate any feedback, no matter how small or lengthy, no matter how critical or raving. So even if your writing skills are surpassed by 3rd graders, write one anyway. But I will tell you this, providers love hobbyists who write spectacular, entertaining reviews. You can imagine how deeply emotional and uplifting it can be to read a glowing, raving, thorough review of your sexual performance; now imagine the feels of a woman, whose physiology and psychology is designed for maximum emotions, when she reads your reviews. You can begin to see the impact a review can have on your relationship with a provider. 

2) STFU.

You're gonna be basking in all the after-glow of being exploring your wildest fantasies. You're gonna have so much vibrant energy that you'll haveto share it with someone! Don't, unless the other person you're spilling the beans to is also a verified hobbyist. 

[Guest]

1 hour ago, Juanmotai said:

3) FFS, don't send one-word or vague emails/text

Sending "Hi, I'm all oiled up and reddy 2 go!" is just going to give the provider a headache; she's running a business and doesn't need you wasting her time with hunky dory bullshiit like that. Just state your request and include 1) Your donation amount, 2) Date and time, e.g. "Hi, I've got $300 for you. This Wednesday at 5pm good? Here are my references (links to reviews/provider phone numbers). Thank you!" Providers will love you for keeping it straightforward and simple. 

 

If you mention money of any kind I will never see you. 

[Juanmotai]

The example given may not be exactly the way it needs to be said, but not all providers put there rates in their ad. Here, on TOB, almost all ads have rates. But other places, BP for instance, they mostly dont. So at some point somehow you need to ask what a providers rates are. Wouldn't it suck to show up without enough $$$ just because you was afraid to ask?? I ask if I don't know. It used to be part of reviews, but that got taken off. So if one lady refuses to give me her donation amount..... NEXT.. no biggie, I move on. 

[time4fun]

Very good summary of informaiton needed to make fun for everyone.

[Guest]

1 hour ago, Juanmotai said:

The example given may not be exactly the way it needs to be said, but not all providers put there rates in their ad.

This is why clients cant figure wether they doing something wrong or right. What one provider allows another doesn't do. This is why I am very blunt. 

Here, on TOB, almost all ads have rates. But other places, BP for instance, they mostly dont.

your right about that. 

So at some point somehow you need to ask what a providers rates are. Wouldn't it suck to show up without enough $$$ just because you was afraid to ask??

If she doesn't have it in her ad then yes he would. Too risky for me

 

[Laci French]

Thanks for this thread Juan

[Juanmotai]

1 hour ago, Laci French-2940 said:

Thanks for this thread Juan

You're very welcome.  

[Johnboy#1]

4 hours ago, Nikki Holiday said:

If you mention money of any kind I will never see you. 

Even if I ask the question; "For an hour of your time, how many roses (diamonds et. al.)should I bring?

[Wendy Whitney]

The only numbers we want to hear is the time and length of the appt - that's all!

[Juanmotai]

17 minutes ago, Wendy Whitney said:

The only numbers we want to hear is the time and length of the appt - that's all!

Like I stated previously, if a providers rates are posted then it's not mentioned, but if they aren't then iam sure as hell gonna ask. It's up to her to decide whether or not she wants to tell me. If she doesn't, then it's on to the next. No big deal honestly

[gr8owl]

If a lady does not post rates anywhere then she had best be willing to answer a properly phrased question- "what is the rate for an hour of your time?"  There is NO WAY I am setting an appointment and waiting until she is at my door or vice versa  having no idea what amount she is going to ask for or expect.  So .... post rates in ad or be willing to briefly aanswer simple question above.  Or, sorry, will not be seeing me.  I don't haggle or negotiate but I do insist on knowing what her fee is.

[gr8owl]

30 minutes ago, Wendy Whitney said:

The only numbers we want to hear is the time and length of the appt - that's all!

Then you need to post a rate so client does not have to ask.

[Guest]

4 hours ago, Wendy Whitney said:

The only numbers we want to hear is the time and length of the appt - that's all!

This

[Guest]

3 hours ago, gr8owl said:

Then you need to post a rate so client does not have to ask.

Your right

[SultryKitten]

I confirm the rate because nothing is more aggravating than being shorted, or miscommunication over what the rates are. To me, my client and I being on the same page allows us both to know what to expect so we can relax without any issues. They are paying for time and companionship, nothing wrong with that.

Xoxo,

Samantha Sheppard

[Mr.Pink]

[Krystal]

Yes I confirm DONATIONS simply because when you go in to pet smart and donate to the pet foundation they have different donations $1 gets you just can pet food where if you donate $5 you get can pet food and a toy in the just of it a higher donations shouldn't get the same thing as a lower donation.. and those who come properly prepared are rewarded where as being short makes a provider feel low.. so know how to ask or confirm but never nagotiate 

 

[amcbl1]

I've never understood why hobbyists find the need to haggle. The services or time and companionship offered are NOT a flea market, (no pun intended).

[BadBoy]

As with most of these threads, I have no idea what you are all talking about.  I have seen around 100 of our lovely Denver/Boulder ladies over the past six years (thank God P411 keeps track for me), and I have never, ever, had any trouble finding out what a ladies' donation is, and I have never  had to ask.  If the client gets off his ass and looks around, it is always listed in the ad, the P411 profile, the private website, etc.  From there it is simple: you take that amount of money in one pocket and put it somewhere discrete upon arrival, and keep a nice tip (10-25%) in another pocket, which you put out at the end if you had a nice time and want to be welcome on future visits.  I almost always go home with empty pockets and a big smile on my face.  What is the issue?

[4yourcontrol]

As a newbie, this is very helpful! What if you are interested in a certain activity, like strap-on play? Any way to find that out without being sexually suggestive?

 

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

Juan is an awesome guy to know! Have never had him as a client (as of yet). Just think he is very down to earth! Always feel like he is smiling at me while Chatting with him too!Juan my friend! Lots of energy with personal feeling went into what you said. I feel the Juan passion spilling out! 

Kisses;)

[Juanmotai]

6 hours ago, Kali Sensual Reiki said:

Juan is an awesome guy to know! Have never had him as a client (as of yet). Just think he is very down to earth! Always feel like he is smiling at me while Chatting with him too!Juan my friend! Lots of energy with personal feeling went into what you said. I feel the Juan passion spilling out! 

Kisses;)

[2Big]

On 6.10.2016 at 1:36 AM, 4yourcontrol said:

As a newbie, this is very helpful! What if you are interested in a certain activity, like strap-on play? Any way to find that out without being sexually suggestive?

 

ASK!

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

2 hours ago, 2Big said:

ASK!

Don't ask! Please read websites and reviews. It is illegal and dangerous to discuss activities until behind closed doors and in person. Use your head.on your shoulders while asking questions please.

 

 

[Guest]

On 10/5/2016 at 5:12 PM, Badboy said:

As with most of these threads, I have no idea what you are all talking about.  I have seen around 100 of our lovely Denver/Boulder ladies over the past six years (thank God P411 keeps track for me), and I have never, ever, had any trouble finding out what a ladies' donation is, and I have never  had to ask.  If the client gets off his ass and looks around, it is always listed in the ad, the P411 profile, the private website, etc.  From there it is simple: you take that amount of money in one pocket and put it somewhere discrete upon arrival, and keep a nice tip (10-25%) in another pocket, which you put out at the end if you had a nice time and want to be welcome on future visits.  I almost always go home with empty pockets and a big smile on my face.  What is the issue?

This is why I keep telling newbies to get P411 and do their research on each escort. They wanna see. Learn to read the advertising. Bring little extra cash as just incase you won't find yourself in a bad position by chance

Edited October 10, 2016 by Nikki Holiday

[Guest]

19 hours ago, Kali Sensual Reiki said:

Don't ask! Please read websites and reviews. It is illegal and dangerous to discuss activities until behind closed doors and in person. Use your head.on your shoulders while asking questions please.

 

 

This

Btw if you discuss services and rates it happens to be under cover your going to jail. For all you boys who do it. Try it sometime and see where it gets you. 

[2Big]

22 hours ago, Kali Sensual Reiki said:

Don't ask! Please read websites and reviews. It is illegal and dangerous to discuss activities until behind closed doors and in person. Use your head.on your shoulders while asking questions please.

 

 

Dumb

3 hours ago, Nikki Holiday said:

This

Btw if you discuss services and rates it happens to be under cover your going to jail. For all you boys who do it. Try it sometime and see where it gets you. 

and dumberer

[Guest]

Here's a thought, see the girl once, be nice and become someone she would enjoy seeing again. THEN, you can ask all the dirty little questions about what she will or won't do. 

[ironman318]

24 minutes ago, Melissa Sterling said:

Here's a thought, see the girl once, be nice and become someone she would enjoy seeing again. THEN, you can ask all the dirty little questions about what she will or won't do. 

Common sense should always prevail. Thank you Melissa 

[Juanmotai]

I never ask a young lady what she will or won't do unless we are in private and in person, and even then i rarely ask. I prefer to let activities just flow. The only question I ask is what the young ladies time is worth, and I will only ask if it doesn't say in her ad or on her website, if she has one. I think it's fair to know what an hour, of the young ladies time will be.