How do you guys deal with all the cheating and lies?

[macho]

How do you guys deal with all the cheating and lies? This only pertains to cheaters and liars. Like wives and girlfriends or your family.

[FirstTracks]

I forgave all of them a long time ago...

[Dweller201]

How do you guys deal with all the cheating and lies? This only pertains to cheaters and liars. Like wives and girlfriends or your family.

I think lies are caused by oppression.

The person feels like they can't talk to you, but they want to do something and they can't trust to tell you, so their only path to freedom is lying. Thus, you caused the lying, not them.

The same goes for cheating.

There's some crazy people though who are pathological liars and will lie to people who they don't need to, but they are rare.

So, if someone is lying to me, I assume I HAVE set up an environment that had made them feel the need to lie. At that point, I say that to the person and try to set things straight and discipline myself.

[inkspot]

It is kind of like when you are at a party. You see someone who is the life of the party but they are also the most irresponsible person there. You know what they are capable of doing and saying, like lying or cheating. I keep a healthy distance from them knowing what they are capable of doing.

If I find that someone has lied to me, I do not have anything to do with them afterward. The whole truth is not always necessary. Just don't lie to me.

Forgiveness is not part of my nature when it comes to lying.

Cheating is a complex issue. You don't know what caused that person to cheat. I am more tolerant of this issue. If alcohol is a contributing factor, then I have nothing to do with that person. Not because they cheat, but because they do not have the will power to put the bottle down. I have no tolerance for a drunk. They will suck the life out of you.

My circle of friends and family does not include any of the above and I get along quite nicely.

[rckymtn3]

I think lies are caused by oppression.

The person feels like they can't talk to you, but they want to do something and they can't trust to tell you, so their only path to freedom is lying. Thus, you caused the lying, not them.

The same goes for cheating.

There's some crazy people though who are pathological liars and will lie to people who they don't need to, but they are rare.

So, if someone is lying to me, I assume I HAVE set up an environment that had made them feel the need to lie. At that point, I say that to the person and try to set things straight and discipline myself.

Interesting take on it, but I feel the opposite.

Not one of us is a perfect angel.

Short of that, lying is something a person chooses to do. If you feel as if you can't talk to someone honestly, your choices are lie, leave, or speak the truth no matter how tough you think it is. Of the three choices, only one makes you a shitty person.

[fork]

How do you guys deal with all the cheating and lies?

I'm a cheater myself, but not a liar. As you can imagine this combination means I am unsuitable for dating.

No woman, no cry. I do not have to deal with cheaters and liars because I don't date!

[Dweller201]

Interesting take on it, but I feel the opposite.

Not one of us is a perfect angel.

Short of that, lying is something a person chooses to do. If you feel as if you can't talk to someone honestly, your choices are lie, leave, or speak the truth no matter how tough you think it is. Of the three choices, only one makes you a shitty person.

Sometimes people choose to lie, but I think mostly they get pushed in that direction through fear.

For instance, if you're a kid and have crazy parents, what can you do? If you do what they want, you'll go crazy like they are, so you must lie to them until you can get away from them. The same thing if you have parents who want to shut you down and keep you as their proper little slave. You want to do what the other kids are doing, so you lie and do normal things behind your parents' back.

The same thing goes for adult relationships. It would be weird for a person to choose to lie when there is no threat leveled against them. However, as I've said, I know that people still do it because they can't stop lying.

[Guest hgritstoo]

Because I stick to well reviewed ladies, cheating is not an issue. And the only lies I uncovered are "Superman" lies.....like the kind Clark Kent tells to keep his true identity secret.

Not a problem for me.

[Krokus]

How do you guys deal with all the cheating and lies? This only pertains to cheaters and liars. Like wives and girlfriends or your family.

you asking about cheating and liars on an escort board now thats fucking funny

a married man sees an escort what the hell do you call that

a hobbiest is on the board cheating on his wife / girlfriends and if she cheats on him so be it what goes agond comes around

[Ghost_Rider]

How do you guys deal with all the cheating and lies?

One lady at a time.......

[Dweller201]

Because I stick to well reviewed ladies, cheating is not an issue. And the only lies I uncovered are "Superman" lies.....like the kind Clark Kent tells to keep his true identity secret.

Not a problem for me.

I love the Superman thing, it's very true about me.

[Jez UaBriain]

Sometimes people have to learn things the hard way. What if they are not drinkers, then one time they pick up the bottle. Things get out of hand, and they end up regretting the action they take , if they can even remember in the first place. This does not necessarily mean they are bad, or haven't any sense of personal integrity. Life is one big grey area.

I take it on person by person basis. I also have a intolerance for liars, cheats, drunks , and thieves. But there is always a concrete reason lying underneath their trespass. THAT is what determines how I feel about them- good or bad.

[Guest hgritstoo]

One lady at a time.......

Well, OK, Sometimes TWO ladies at a time........

[irisheyes]

I'm pretty cynical, but I believe all people are liars and cheats and if not I'm pretty sure I can make them be depending on what I pose as a personal question or offer to a personal circumstance.

I'm always open to other people sharing their opinions to me regarding this, but since I've already tested mine more than enough times on this journey called life, all while realizing I'm not 100% correct, I'm pretty damn close each and every time not be swayed different.

I just chalk it up to life and human nature depending on what is asked or what the circumstance is.

Ultimately though, I can accept someone who lies and cheats, I know I have and I won't sugarcoat it, but I don't care who they lie to or cheat on, if it directly affects me..........then we have a problem.

It all goes into cost/benefit and pick and choose.

To be honest, I feel a lot more comfortable around others who I know have lied and cheated, or are open about it to me. At least I know in maintaining a friendship just to keep a careful eye. People who I don't know whether they lie or cheat, or have a clean slate, those are the one's I have to keep more of a watchful eye on, it's exhaustive, and it always keeps me guessing. The one's you never saw coming are the worst. Doesn't matter to me whether it's in politics, business, or personal.

[harpo]

All of us will do anything under certain circumstances (unfortunately )I share your opinion....here is an interesting quote !

“Churchill: "Madam, would you sleep with me for five million pounds?" Socialite: "My goodness, Mr. Churchill... Well, I suppose... we would have to discuss terms, of course... "

Churchill: "Would you sleep with me for five pounds?"

Socialite: "Mr. Churchill, what kind of woman do you think I am?!" Churchill: "Madam, we've already established that. Now we are haggling about the price”

I'm pretty cynical, but I believe all people are liars and cheats and if not I'm pretty sure I can make them be depending on what I pose as a personal question or offer to a personal circumstance.

I'm always open to other people sharing their opinions to me regarding this, but since I've already tested mine more than enough times on this journey called life, all while realizing I'm not 100% correct, I'm pretty damn close each and every time not be swayed different.

I just chalk it up to life and human nature depending on what is asked or what the circumstance is.

.

[mustang]

How do you guys deal with all the cheating and lies? This only pertains to cheaters and liars. Like wives and girlfriends or your family.

Are you seeking instruction and technique pointers, .... or are you attempting to be a moral compass for humanity?????

[boink36]

How do you guys deal with all the cheating and lies? This only pertains to cheaters and liars. Like wives and girlfriends or your family.

I took a minute to run this post through the hobby forum post translator.

here is what I got back..............................

"So this is the place where my husband found a great hooker at a good

price?"

[Jez UaBriain]

I'm pretty cynical, but I believe all people are liars and cheats and if not I'm pretty sure I can make them be depending on what I pose as a personal question or offer to a personal circumstance.

I'm always open to other people sharing their opinions to me regarding this, but since I've already tested mine more than enough times on this journey called life, all while realizing I'm not 100% correct, I'm pretty damn close each and every time not be swayed different.

I just chalk it up to life and human nature depending on what is asked or what the circumstance is.

Ultimately though, I can accept someone who lies and cheats, I know I have and I won't sugarcoat it, but I don't care who they lie to or cheat on, if it directly affects me..........then we have a problem.

It all goes into cost/benefit and pick and choose.

To be honest, I feel a lot more comfortable around others who I know have lied and cheated, or are open about it to me. At least I know in maintaining a friendship just to keep a careful eye. People who I don't know whether they lie or cheat, or have a clean slate, those are the one's I have to keep more of a watchful eye on, it's exhaustive, and it always keeps me guessing. The one's you never saw coming are the worst. Doesn't matter to me whether it's in politics, business, or personal.

It's a known fact that ruthlessness is a fast way to get ahead. I don't care for this, and prefer to get ahead with my personal integrity intact . However, some types of lies are more easily acceptable, and don't harm anyone. Such as a "white lie". No one is harmed by it and why we do it it is ? But indeed, every living, breathing, sentient mammal on this rock that we live on has done it at one time or another. The type of lie that bothers me is the type that creates harm to those who are being lied to, or about. Such as a large portion of those who are cops will lie under oath on the court room stand. Or a murderer will lie to protect their own worthless hide. These people in reality can not have a sense of personal integrity that they follow, and are probably somewhere in the realm of sociopathic personality disorders. I think that is a strong possibility.

So is there such a thing as the "white lie type cheater"? Where the guy/ hobbiest does this meet up with a professional woman because his SO does not desire intimacy anymore. Or she has medical issues. But he still feels a deep , abiding love for his spouse. Or there is a medical reason for not having sex. As long as they don't know, no harm done. Marriage stays intact, and life goes on. But what about the cheater who gets sex inside of the SO relationship, and outside of it at the same time. Does this mean he is a pathological liar and/or cheater? Not necessarily, it may be a overly active sex drive, or maybe a sexual disorder, who knows? Some people do have a higher sex drive then others. And we are hard-wired to procreate . At one time that was entirely necessary in order for our species to survive. So maybe it is easy to say, some of us don't fall to far from the tree of life. Thank god for birth control , eh?

But I think what really drives people to stray outside the marital field is boredom; and not necessarily that they are pathological liars, and/or cheaters. And I think the reason many women with hold sex is not to hold an edge over their spouse (as some will say) but because they are- simply put- bored . Bored with the sex between their husband and them. But that is another thread.

But given time, anyone here can come up with the words to support their argumnant , but what matters is the words that they use support their character.

My apology for rambling on and on.

[macho]

Are you seeking instruction and technique pointers, .... or are you attempting to be a moral compass for humanity?????

Sure.

[macho]

It's a known fact that ruthlessness is a fast way to get ahead. I don't care for this, and prefer to get ahead with my personal integrity intact . However, some types of lies are more easily acceptable, and don't harm anyone. Such as a "white lie". No one is harmed by it and why we do it it is ? But indeed, every living, breathing, sentient mammal on this rock that we live on has done it at one time or another. The type of lie that bothers me is the type that creates harm to those who are being lied to, or about. Such as a large portion of those who are cops will lie under oath on the court room stand. Or a murderer will lie to protect their own worthless hide. These people in reality can not have a sense of personal integrity that they follow, and are probably somewhere in the realm of sociopathic personality disorders. I think that is a strong possibility.

So is there such a thing as the "white lie type cheater"? Where the guy/ hobbiest does this meet up with a professional woman because his SO does not desire intimacy anymore. Or she has medical issues. But he still feels a deep , abiding love for his spouse. Or there is a medical reason for not having sex. As long as they don't know, no harm done. Marriage stays intact, and life goes on. But what about the cheater who gets sex inside of the SO relationship, and outside of it at the same time. Does this mean he is a pathological liar and/or cheater? Not necessarily, it may be a overly active sex drive, or maybe a sexual disorder, who knows? Some people do have a higher sex drive then others. And we are hard-wired to procreate . At one time that was entirely necessary in order for our species to survive. So maybe it is easy to say, some of us don't fall to far from the tree of life. Thank god for birth control , eh?

But I think what really drives people to stray outside the marital field is boredom; and not necessarily that they are pathological liars, and/or cheaters. And I think the reason many women with hold sex is not to hold an edge over their spouse (as some will say) but because they are- simply put- bored . Bored with the sex between their husband and them. But that is another thread.

But given time, anyone here can come up with the words to support their argumnant , but what matters is the words that they use support their character.

My apology for rambling on and on.

I think underneath your rambling you made a lot of sense.

[Dweller201]

I think underneath your rambling you made a lot of sense.

That was well written!

[macho]

That was well written!

Thanks dude! It's just the whole lying thing I can't handle about this hobby. I thought you were a d-bag but now compliments will get you everywhere.

[pitbull]

So far, I have not told one lie. I have not volunteered information, but no lies.

[macho]

You guys want to know what's ironic? Yes!!! Well I lie all the time online but in person it's a whole different story. Just saying I wish hobbbing was socially acceptable .

Edited October 6, 2013 by macho
I love you!!

[Vic Kosslovich]

How do I deal with cheaters and liars? I send them to Washington.....

[MAG]

You guys want to know what's ironic? Yes!!! Well I lie all the time online but in person it's a whole different story. Just saying I wish hobbbing was socially acceptable .

You're saying you always tell the truth in your personal life? Bullshit. Nobody is that virtuous.

Online or not - -doesn't matter. People are liars, to varying degrees.

[macho]

You're saying you always tell the truth in your personal life? Bullshit. Nobody is that virtuous.

Online or not - -doesn't matter. People are liars, to varying degrees.

I have no idea what your talking about but I agree.!

[nairobi09]

In the 'real world' of contemporary Amerika lying was almost become a way of life. In

terms of ideology lying is rationalized by the belief that a system in which everybody is only out for themselves somehow works out of the best in some collective sense. I

have (unfortunately) worked with people that lived and breathed this belief system

and have seen how this is reflected in the policies gurgling out of Washington and the resulting mass of marginally unemployed people.

Is this connected to lying in our personal lives? How could it not be?

[Jez UaBriain]

How do I deal with cheaters and liars? I send them to Washington.....

Ditto!!!

And that comment right there ladies and gentlemen- no truer words could be said. Sad but true.

[Pirate]

I don't believe in cheating or lying. Myself and my significant other agreed on an open relationship long before we move in together. She is a very openminded lady who is non-judgemental of sex workers. The first time I saw an escort we did it as a couple. We're not swingers and I rarely date other girls or see escorts, but if I do I know it won't be a problem because she's not the jealous possessive type.