New and lost

[Suasponte]

I guess I should throw it all there and ask for advice. Ive never done any of this before but I want to. I dont have references or a history in the community. Ive tried  doing research and have been given the advice to look for providers who are "welcome to new comers"....Ive seen one or two such posts and no offense to those providers but Im looking for a different kind of experience. I just need some advice on how to get a foot in the door. Im a fairly young professional (37) who woild liken to find something exciting, safe, reliable, and consistent. Any advice would be much appreciated! Thank you in advance for your time!

[pfunk]

8 hours ago, Suasponte said:

Ive tried  doing research and have been given the advice to look for providers who are "welcome to new comers"....Ive seen one or two such posts and no offense to those providers but Im looking for a different kind of experience. I just need some advice on how to get a foot in the door. 

Define "different kind of experience". 

You're going to have to give up personal information, so your potential escort date can vet you.  She needs to feel comfortable that you're not a mentally unstable threat. 

You get your foot in the door by being open, honest, and easy to deal with. Once you've seen someone, who will give you a reference, things become much easier.

[lustybustygina]

Screening is very important for our & your safety , So just do it !!

You will have to give up info , upstanding ladies do screening and being Discreet is very important

( yes it can be done )

 

[gr8owl]

See top of page, right under the TOB logo - there is a row of "boxes".  Go to far right to "search."  Enter "newbie" and select topic as the type of search.  Many prior threads asking this exact question will come up.  Many suggestions, most of them good.

Edited March 25, 2021 by gr8owl

[average1]

17 hours ago, Suasponte said:

I just need some advice on how to get a foot in the door. Im a fairly young professional (37) who woild liken to find something exciting, safe, reliable, and consistent. Any advice would be much appreciated! Thank you in advance for your time!

Research is our friend.  There is a lot of info on a variety of ladies on TOB.  Reviews are helpful to read to get an idea of possibilities.  There are some "newbie" friendly ladies, but be prepared to be screened.  As both @pfunk and @lustybustygina stated, screening is part of the process for safety.  When I got started (and continuing through today) I try to be open to reasonable questions, be clear in my communication with no rude or disrespectful language.  I never ask questions using explicit language.  I want my communication to indicate that I am the type of person who is friendly, reasonable, respectful and someone who sees the lady as a genuine person, not just a commodity or object.  Not wanting to be seen as a "timewaster", I always offer a couple of specific dates/times/duration that would work for me.  Contacting a lady by her stated preference (phone call or text or PM from the board) is important.  Participation on the TOB forums can help people to get to know a bit about you.

Be safe, be respectful of boundaries, be friendly and who knows....you might find something/someone fun who can provide what you are looking for.

[Strange_Ice]

On 3/24/2021 at 11:37 PM, Suasponte said:

I guess I should throw it all there and ask for advice. Ive never done any of this before but I want to. I dont have references or a history in the community. Ive tried  doing research and have been given the advice to look for providers who are "welcome to new comers"....Ive seen one or two such posts and no offense to those providers but Im looking for a different kind of experience. I just need some advice on how to get a foot in the door. Im a fairly young professional (37) who woild liken to find something exciting, safe, reliable, and consistent. Any advice would be much appreciated! Thank you in advance for your time!

In bold.... my suggestion (right or wrong) is that as someone new that I'd trying to get a foot in, you might want to lower some standards and expectations and find those newbie friendly ladies that get as close as possible to what your looking for. Then once you get that foot in you can start narrowing down more specifically what you really want

[lustybustygina]

OP  do your screening on the provider as well  (ie check her out & Google Number email web site reviews & more )

[sb1212]

Welcome to the TOB Superstore! Lots to choose from here. Something for everyone! A couple guidelines:

1. Do your research.  Use the TOB search engine to identify who you want to see, and who might see you (newbie friendly). Look at reviews, profiles and websites to narrow your choices, and to potentially answer basic questions (rates, incall/outcall, rough location, newbie friendly, screening requirements, preferred communication.  etc). Initially lean toward established, local, well reviewed beauties. 

3. Make a choice and connect! Follow her screening requirements. DONT TRY TO NEGOTIATE!. Either accept rates and screening or move on. Be polite, be respectful. You are requesting an intimate date, not ordering a pizza. Initial message should include name, (whatever you want to use), suggested day/time, duration, in/out.  Lots of please and thank you. 

4. Have fun! Lots of it!  Bring a gift!  Ask her if she will provide a reference. 

5. Write a review (unless she prefers that you dont). 

6. Rinse and repeat...

 

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

On 3/25/2021 at 10:39 AM, lustybustygina said:

Screening is very important for our & your safety , So just do it !!

You will have to give up info , upstanding ladies do screening and being Discreet is very important

( yes it can be done )

 

Screening is done differently by each of the compainions! We promise We are only concerned about our safety. So, please be willing to answer a few simple questions.  

Edited April 10, 2021 by Kali Sensual Reiki

[filthytrance]

I’m relatively new and had a hard time figuring it all out when I started too. 
 

As with most things in life, it takes patience and resilience to learn. Perhaps more so in this area because it is not publicly accepted. 
 

Most all the suggestions on here are great, would have saved me a lot of time :). I’ll add a few things:

1- decide on your own boundaries. How will you communicate? What are the non-negotiables to you? What’s your budget? Stick to your boundaries, even when you’re tempted to cross them. You’ll regret it if you cross your own boundaries  

2- TOB, Tryst, and Slyxa (and others, depending on your area) are all great places to find potential providers, but you want to look beyond that. Most of the legit providers will post in some or all of the boards. Most of the established ones will have their own site for information and  booking. Are their messages and photos consistent? 

3- Be patient. It’s worth it. My first experience was pretty bad, but I learned a lot from it. I learned even more from my first great experience. You might not get it right the first time, but learn from it and keep going. 

[nf77]

Just pay yer dues, if you want to see the more choosy providers.  You never know, some of those you think aren't your type may surprise you, keep an open mind.

[Guest]

This is a process. When I first entered, I was intimidated by the screening. Once “they” know you’re not a lunatic, you’ll get references and it will become the wonderful world it is. Also, it takes days to get the attention sometimes. That’s just the deal. I’ve waited for what feels like an eternity, but then it happens and you’re in heaven. Have fun!

[Todoesprivado]

Even if you are looking for a “different kind of experience” I recommend you book with the newbie friendly ladies and once you get a few references then you can be choosy. 

[BigBaldBlk]

What's funny is many gents think ladies who offer 'newbie friendly' are the stepping stones to better providers.  That's not always the case.  To this day, I still see the first lady who gave me my first reference who happened to be 'newbie friendly' (and still is) many years ago. 

To the OP, hopefully you've had an opportunity to spend time with a lovely by now.  If not, I'm not sure what other advice to offer you better than the advice given above by all.

[average1]

8 minutes ago, BigBaldBlk said:

What's funny is many gents think ladies who offer 'newbie friendly' are the stepping stones to better providers.  That's not always the case.  To this day, I still see the first lady who gave me my first reference who happened to be 'newbie friendly' (and still is) many years ago. 

To the OP, hopefully you've had an opportunity to spend time with a lovely by now.  If not, I'm not sure what other advice to offer you better than the advice given above by all.

I agree.  Some of the finest ladies I've seen have been newbie friendly.  And with research, there are some fine times to be had for most everyone.  That is what I like about our community and this hobby.

[zman999]

13 hours ago, BigBaldBlk said:

What's funny is many gents think ladies who offer 'newbie friendly' are the stepping stones to better providers.  That's not always the case.  To this day, I still see the first lady who gave me my first reference who happened to be 'newbie friendly' (and still is) many years ago. 

To the OP, hopefully you've had an opportunity to spend time with a lovely by now.  If not, I'm not sure what other advice to offer you better than the advice given above by all.

Ya I used to actually still see my first lady to ever let me come visit. Never did get a reference here from her but saw her several times a year until she stopped answering messages (think she retired).  

[zman999]

On 4/29/2021 at 10:34 PM, nf77 said:

Just pay yer dues, if you want to see the more choosy providers.  You never know, some of those you think aren't your type may surprise you, keep an open mind.

I would also add, some of the more choosy ones are the ones I've had the least fun experiences with (not bad experiences just not my ATF).   Of course ymmv as with everything.

Also one of the pickiest ones I've ever had kept changing the goal posts on me. First it was do this personal info verification which I did for her newbie verification then she wouldn't book...she said go get 2 tob references which I finally did...but then she said I need 4....so I did...then she changed it again and I never contacted her after that🤣. At the end of the day just be open to different choices and don't get your hopes up for any one lady, remember just like we have free choice to pick who we see, so do they. 😁

[zman999]

Oh and one more tip, be patient. There will be several ladies who just won't even message you back for some reason. I just jinxed myself or something because I'm 0/2 on new ladies this past month. 😂. Can't take it personally, just have to move on and keep trying. Eventually the right connection will happen. 

[ilovewomen]

When contacting a lady, make sure you are following her preferred method of contact, introduce yourself with a couple of sentences, be discreet and respectful.

[zman999]

3 hours ago, ilovewomen said:

When contacting a lady, make sure you are following her preferred method of contact, introduce yourself with a couple of sentences, be discreet and respectful.

Always do every single time. I typically go through TOB and send pm with references shared (yes I read the add and no she has no preference on contact in the post).  My usual first message goes like this:  "Hello xyz, I'm abc nice to meet you.   I was wondering... I've shared my references....let me know if you need anything else....thanks abc". If text is her preference, I send the same message with any other details she may ask for. 

Then 50/50 if I ever hear back or if she ever even reads the message🤣.  Thinking some ladies are just more busy or aren't really taking new clients (new to them not newbies), no matter to each their own. I often just delete the message and move on with my life.  Plenty of amazing ladies out there for me to see. Matter of fact one of my ATF is in town so maybe I'll setup a second meet with her 😍.  

 

Edited August 11, 2021 by zman999

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

14 hours ago, ilovewomen said:

When contacting a lady, make sure you are following her preferred method of contact, introduce yourself with a couple of sentences, be discreet and respectful.

 This is precisely the perfect way to approach me! I always love a great introduction!🥰

[ilovewomen]

On 8/11/2021 at 11:46 AM, zman999 said:

Always do every single time. I typically go through TOB and send pm with references shared (yes I read the add and no she has no preference on contact in the post).  My usual first message goes like this:  "Hello xyz, I'm abc nice to meet you.   I was wondering... I've shared my references....let me know if you need anything else....thanks abc". If text is her preference, I send the same message with any other details she may ask for. 

Then 50/50 if I ever hear back or if she ever even reads the message🤣.  Thinking some ladies are just more busy or aren't really taking new clients (new to them not newbies), no matter to each their own. I often just delete the message and move on with my life.  Plenty of amazing ladies out there for me to see. Matter of fact one of my ATF is in town so maybe I'll setup a second meet with her 😍.  

 

Go for your ATF if she is available.

As for the other ladies not responding, some ladies feel that if they don't respond within a certain time period, they don't respond at all...trying to be discreet. And some don't respond if they aren't interested.

It never hurts to try a second time and maybe say that she can can respond back at her convenience or state what times you aren't available to receive messages. Something like that.

Like you said, there are plenty of lovely ladies out there to meet.

Good luck.

[zman999]

4 hours ago, ilovewomen said:

Go for your ATF if she is available.

As for the other ladies not responding, some ladies feel that if they don't respond within a certain time period, they don't respond at all...trying to be discreet. And some don't respond if they aren't interested.

It never hurts to try a second time and maybe say that she can can respond back at her convenience or state what times you aren't available to receive messages. Something like that.

Like you said, there are plenty of lovely ladies out there to meet.

Good luck.

Oh I already did book with my ATF 😂.  I was only merely posting for the OP to let him know he isn't alone, it happens to all of us. 

At the end of the day everyone is free to choose to respond or not to respond to any particular communications.  

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

On 3/26/2021 at 2:16 PM, Strange_Ice said:

In bold.... my suggestion (right or wrong) is that as someone new that I'd trying to get a foot in, you might want to lower some standards and expectations and find those newbie friendly ladies that get as close as possible to what your looking for. Then once you get that foot in you can start narrowing down more specifically what you really want

“Newbie friendly” doesn't necessarily equate to settling! “Newbie friendly” does not mean steppingstone  stone either! That’s a bunch of bullshit when i hear that! Newbie Friendly means more self-confidence with screening and choosing clientele. Zeroing in on a lady of choice and give your personal info with grace and less bullshit please! 

[Imyrhklbry]

On 8/11/2021 at 11:02 PM, Kali Sensual Reiki said:

 This is precisely the perfect way to approach me! I always love a great introduction!🥰

Enjoy how we connected! 🥰 Just through another forum topic and private messages.. we clicked immediately! And have been "clicking" ever since ! 🥰😍🥰👅👅💪👅💪👅💋