Let's stir the pot

[mj76]

1 hour ago, SpiceInCo said:

I'm talking on the long term client  spectrum.  Not on hey this is out first visit type thing.  When I was with my ex husband there were common denominations between the clients and  myself that we were experiencing together like, lack luster sex life, no lovey  dovey, divorce etc.  This wasn't meant as in you pour your heart to someone you've only  seen a few times lol. Sorry for not saying it that way the first time 

For me it doesn't matter how long I have know the provider or how many times I have seen her I don't want to talk about relationships. I want to leave the real world behind for an hour and be with a lady I don't have a chance with in the real world. During that time I want to avoid any depressing subjects. I'm happy to talk about any subject that is positive.

[Lucy Kitten]

34 minutes ago, gr8owl said:

Back up a few squares.  My first post - "If I become aware ................"  No I do not ask, but if it somehow comes to my attention that she has an SO and that the SO is not aware and good with it, I am gone.  Her business is her business, but mine is mine.  No harm no foul, but gone.

I was just curious when you said it was your right to choose to engage just made me wonder if you asked those sorts of questions and at what point does the topic come up?

[Guest]

Well, I am married. and everything Pfunk said is spot on. As a matter of fact, a couple of the guys who have replied in this thread have met him and several others as well.. My very first client ever and my husband are flipping like best buddies now. Yeah sometimes it gets weird. The bottom line is this, he knows what I do, he is fine with it. It is business and he is actually happy when I have a "good" day full of fun because a certain guy made my toes curl. I will talk about him if asked but otherwise i do not. Like Pfunk and his lady, we work. He is not jealous. He knows I am not out there looking for the next best thing.  .

[Bit Banger]

40 minutes ago, Melissa Sterling said:

... He knows I am not out there looking for the next best thing.  .

I think ^^this^^ is key. For some it works. Others? Not so much. 

[Vegas Jen-5884]

On 2/26/2016 at 5:24 AM, SpiceInCo said:

This was the reason I brought this up.  On the other board I used to be on there is a discussion going on exactly like this.  2 providers admitted to being married and the men jumped on them.  It really baffled me since so many clients are married.  Seemed a little hypocritical. 

I was going to reference that exact discussion but you beat me to it, lol. I don't think I could even finish reading that thread over there. The hypocrisy was just too much... Views out west tend to be a little more fair and rational overall. Toto, we aren't in the bible belt anymore, lol... Welcome :-)

[sparkey600]

On 2/26/2016 at 8:26 PM, gr8owl said:

Bitch about your SO and i am gone, not to return.  Don't need to hear that drama.

I'm with you bro!

[abigailfox]

I would say a good 90% of my clients are single. As I have said many a time before....I don't do the double life well...and I am not a cheater by nature. I am actually extremely loyal, almost to a fault. To each their own. I do this mostly for fun, second for money. I have met some wonderful people in this business, maybe partially because of my "attitude" which those who have actually met me can testify to. I rarely if ever nowadays run across men I would consider resentful towards females, or those who want to bitch. So....maybe that is successful marketing, or maybe like attracts like Either way it works for me. I am not a square, and if it works for you to be married and provide, it does...all I am saying is that is not something I could handle. Would be super silly of me to judge anyone.

[Just Plain Joe]

I recall one young lady who I'd seen several times before, so I knew she was married.  One session she opened the door with her wedding ring still on.  Didn't bother me at all--in fact it kind of turned me on thinking about it.  I've since added "playing with a woman while her SO watches" to my bucket list. 

[Mustang87]

I don't think you would routinely know if a provider is married.  You would, of course, is she is wearing a ring, but short of that, how would you know? I don't see any reason for a YL to advertise the fact.  If I was seeing a lady who was married I would want to be assured that the husband is aware and consents, for obvious reasons.

[Guest]

1 hour ago, Mustang87 said:

I don't think you would routinely know if a provider is married.  You would, of course, is she is wearing a ring, but short of that, how would you know? I don't see any reason for a YL to advertise the fact.  If I was seeing a lady who was married I would want to be assured that the husband is aware and consents, for obvious reasons.

Hold up, wait a minute. Should ASPs have the fellas bring approval letters from their SO? 

[Guest]

4 hours ago, Mustang87 said:

If I was seeing a lady who was married I would want to be assured that the husband is aware and consents, for obvious reasons.

While this would be considered a providers personal life, I understand your reasoning behind this. 

[Guest]

20 minutes ago, Nikki Holiday said:

While this would be considered a providers personal life, I understand your reasoning behind this. 

Unless it is volunteered, certain information is not the important.  The only thing that matters is the would you like to neeked with me for $xxx!  If not, OK let's move on...

[jj254-1]

I'm used to open or polyamorous relationships. Jealous is a weird thing to me. I just like to play. Most grown ups do. Why lock folks down to one partner?

[Bit Banger]

I'm waiting for the polyamorous to demand the same rights the homoamorous are starting to get (marriage, etc.)

 

[Mustang87]

22 hours ago, Leigh5280 said:

Hold up, wait a minute. Should ASPs have the fellas bring approval letters from their SO? 

Good Point.  Let me explain where I was coming from.  I've seen a number of ladies hosting out of their homes.  If there happened to be a husband living who was not aware what was going on while he was at work...well, you can see the concern.  But short of something like that, I don't think the ladies have any more obligation then theguys to reveal details of their personal lives.

[jj254-1]

17 hours ago, Bit Banger said:

I'm waiting for the polyamorous to demand the same rights the homoamorous are starting to get (marriage, etc.)

 

They might. It'd be hard to manage stuff like custody in a divorce. Rest would be easy. Most folks I know who dig polyamorous lifestyles aren't big on marriage anyway though. 

[Bit Banger]

15 minutes ago, jj254 said:

They might. It'd be hard to manage stuff like custody in a divorce. Rest would be easy. Most folks I know who dig polyamorous lifestyles aren't big on marriage anyway though. 

I was thinking of the legal benefits (taxes, insurance, estates, medical powers, etc.) of marriage.   The kind of stuff homosexuals fought so hard to acquire. The business side of marriage, if you will. Yes, some of them can be addressed with other legal instruments, most of the time but not always. Custody would still be with whoever had the more suitable, stable environment for the dependents.

I have long said that the state should not be involved in marriage. Leave that to religion. I'm also a proponent of a simple tax code. Add all the income for a family unit, subtract a personal deduction for each member of that unit, tax that amount at what ever rate is deemed appropriate (progressive or flat).  No deductions for interest, for donations, for medical, the list goes on. If we went with a flat tax, I would even say eliminate special treatment for capital gains as the tax averages out over the period the investment was held. This doesn't work for progressive rates because of the bracket jump when gains are realized. 

[jj254-1]

1 hour ago, Bit Banger said:

I was thinking of the legal benefits (taxes, insurance, estates, medical powers, etc.) of marriage.   The kind of stuff homosexuals fought so hard to acquire. The business side of marriage, if you will. Yes, some of them can be addressed with other legal instruments, most of the time but not always. Custody would still be with whoever had the more suitable, stable environment for the dependents.

I have long said that the state should not be involved in marriage. Leave that to religion. I'm also a proponent of a simple tax code. Add all the income for a family unit, subtract a personal deduction for each member of that unit, tax that amount at what ever rate is deemed appropriate (progressive or flat).  No deductions for interest, for donations, for medical, the list goes on. If we went with a flat tax, I would even say eliminate special treatment for capital gains as the tax averages out over the period the investment was held. This doesn't work for progressive rates because of the bracket jump when gains are realized. 

Marriage is a contract. State should respond that way.  

Flat tax is regressive. Badly. 15% income loss hurts less @ 100k than @25k. Been a few places. Did a few things. Everyone wants the same thing. Food, house, not to be murdered. Kinda pyscho such a rich country is cool with hungry, homeless, and murdered. 

Capital gains is set up to encourage long term investment. Helps stop volatile crashes. Supposedly. Rate is low on gains. How high can it go and not destroy retirement?

[Bit Banger]

Yes, marriage is a contract, and as such should not have religious restrictions (man&woman, only 2 people, etc) placed upon it by the State. But marriage is also a rite in many religions, and was so before the existence of the State. My problem is that many people conflate the two and want to force their belief system on others. Leave marriage as a religious rite (based on seniority). If you wish to register your family contract with the State, apply for a civil union contract (not a marriage license). Yes, it's semantics, but lots of folks (both L & R) get bent out of shape over the wording.

"Render unto Caesar that which is Caesar's", "Separation of church & state" and all that. 

 

As an aside, I wonder how many Islamic families in the US are polygamous, as permitted by their faith. I think I've seen a few in restaurants around town. 

[Buddy Glass]

Everyone's here for a reason, and everyone here is hiding it from someone. It's poor form to ask why and who. 

[jhooker]

I know a SP who is married, every time I come over its like I'm a back door man, her home is decorated with pictures of them, wedding pics by the bed as we fuck. I asked her about it she said he wasn't privy to her side job, but that they had an open marriage. OK by me. But one time I was about to use the master bath and she quickly diverted me to the bath across the hall. I had the feeling that maybe we were not alone, but it didn't creep me out, I just hoped I put on a good enough show. 

[Guest]

That would be outright creepy!!!!

[ChicaChaser]

Yeah real creepy! 

[amcbl1]

One of my ATF's was married and yes her husband knew of her participation in the hobby. It never bothered me in the least. If he was cool with it, so was I. I've come to find out that she has been recently divorced so maybe it did bother him more than he let on. However, many things can interrupt a marriage, and her engaging in the hobby may have had nothing to do with the separation.