Weekend nookie?

[Guest]

I would like to ask my ATF to go on a weekend with me and while I know she can spare the time and we can agree on an overall price for the weekend, what I am a little squeemish about discussing is the amount of playtime to expect. Obviously, I want alot, but I certainly do not want her to feel uncomfortable ( as if a weekend with me isn't uncomfortable enough ). I would aslo like things to kind of flow naturally and discussing this seems like it would be kinda awkward. Any advise from those more experienced with this kind of thing?

[MAG]

I would like to ask my ATF to go on a weekend with me and while I know she can spare the time and we can agree on an overall price for the weekend, what I am a little squeemish about discussing is the amount of playtime to expect. Obviously, I want alot, but I certainly do not want her to feel uncomfortable ( as if a weekend with me isn't uncomfortable enough ). I would aslo like things to kind of flow naturally and discussing this seems like it would be kinda awkward. Any advise from those more experienced with this kind of thing?

Good gawd - get a girlfriend, it would be a lot easier and a lot cheaper.

[snip - intent to antagonize/bickering bait]

Edited August 13, 2014 by Mace

[Guest Mr.Bubble]

I would like to ask my ATF to go on a weekend with me and while I know she can spare the time and we can agree on an overall price for the weekend, what I am a little squeemish about discussing is the amount of playtime to expect. Obviously, I want alot, but I certainly do not want her to feel uncomfortable ( as if a weekend with me isn't uncomfortable enough ). I would aslo like things to kind of flow naturally and discussing this seems like it would be kinda awkward. Any advise from those more experienced with this kind of thing?

There once was a man from Racine,

Who invented a fucking machine.......

......which a provider most definitely is not.

If she's really your atf, you've already seen her numerous times. You should be able to discuss this. Tell her your expectations. She may accept them or may not.....in which case she'll make a counter proposal.

Please consider her needs as well. Yes, she's coming to see you to gratify you sexually, but even racehorses have to eat, sleep, and pee. No one wants to have someone pounding them 24/7.

I suggest you discuss it. Be reasonable. Ask her about sleeping arrangements ( I find sleeping to be more intimate than sex.....and prefer to sleep alone) and what kinds of foods she likes. What are you going to do during down time together? She may need time alone to rest, check her emails, or (in my case) laugh quietly without hurting your feelings.

If you treat her like a guest rather than a hooker, you'll both have a much better time.

[Paul Pudenda]

My ATF was no longer my ATF after a weekend excursion. Worst of all, we tried it twice!

[pitbull]

Man, just let it flow. If you focus on having a good time with her, you'll get nookie at night, in the morning, and probably a nooner at least one of the days. I think three times a day is definitely expected, and she probably knows that. Have fun.

[Guest]

As a provider, my recommendation to anyone considering a weekend is to hire someone who enjoys doing GFE, first of all. Is that something your ATF does, or is she more of a 3G provider?

If you're going to spend an entire weekend with someone, treat her like you would treat a girlfriend who you were spending a weekend with. If your relationship is naturally hot and heavy already, then expecting to spend a lot of time in a bed may not be an unrealistic expectation. But don't push it. Remember that things can happen- she might suddenly become sick or otherwise feel unwell. She might not be as young as she used to be and is only capable of doing it so many times. You can talk about it ahead of time, and maybe even agree on some basic expectations- but please respect her needs if anything changes.

[pitbull]

As a provider, my recommendation to anyone considering a weekend is to hire someone who enjoys doing GFE, first of all. Is that something your ATF does, or is she more of a 3G provider?

If you're going to spend an entire weekend with someone, treat her like you would treat a girlfriend who you were spending a weekend with. If your relationship is naturally hot and heavy already, then expecting to spend a lot of time in a bed may not be an unrealistic expectation. But don't push it. Remember that things can happen- she might suddenly become sick or otherwise feel unwell. She might not be as young as she used to be and is only capable of doing it so many times. You can talk about it ahead of time, and maybe even agree on some basic expectations- but please respect her needs if anything changes.

Good advice. However, I don't think sex expectations are precisely the same as a girlfriend. Frankly, the sexpectations are quite a bit higher, because you don't pay your girlfriend an enormous amount of money to spend two days together. Hookers are there because they put out in spades. That may sound crass, but that's the way many of us look at the profession. Girlfriends and wives are great, but providers provide even when they are not totally into it.

[Lucy Kitten]

Good advice. However, I don't think sex expectations are precisely the same as a girlfriend. Frankly, the sexpectations are quite a bit higher, because you don't pay your girlfriend an enormous amount of money to spend two days together. Hookers are there because they put out in spades. That may sound crass, but that's the way many of us look at the profession. Girlfriends and wives are great, but providers provide even when they are not totally into it.

We don't put out in spades and I personally never "provide" when I am not feeling it. Money given is for time and companionship not fuck fests. It sounds crass because it is.

I have now done many weekend visits, albeit mostly with the same person but the focus was never non-stop fucking it's about spending time with someone you actually can tolerate for 48+ hours.

I don't think most guys think the same way you do. Most realize that we are only human and can only do so much in a day.

[MAG]

We don't put out in spades and I personally never "provide" when I am not feeling it. Money given is for time and companionship not fuck fests. It sounds crass because it is.

I have now done many weekend visits, albeit mostly with the same person but the focus was never non-stop fucking it's about spending time with someone you actually can tolerate for 48+ hours.

I don't think most guys think the same way you do. Most realize that we are only human and can only do so much in a day.

There's a huge difference between "putting out in spades" and "non stop fucking". Not sure how you made that leap.

"Money given is for time and companionship" -- that's a distinction hookers use in their ads, mostly to deflect attention from LE. I believe most guys DO think as pit described (excluding your assumptions). We don't buy into that "time & companionship" bullshit. If we pay a hooker a huge fee for a whole weekend, we're expecting to get seriously laid. Not necessarily non-stop, but definitely more than with an SO.

By the way, "fuck fest" was your phrase, not his.

[pfunk]

We don't buy into that "time & companionship" bullshit. If we pay a hooker a huge fee for a whole weekend, we're expecting to get seriously laid.

Who is this "we", you speak of? It's certainly not me, nor most guys, I've met, who participate in this.

Every guy is different, and that's why a lot of advice is cautionary. Details like sleeping arrangements, sexual frequency, food likes and dislikes, entertainment options, etc, etc, should be discussed before hand. Especially if you feel like you're "paying a huge fee". Avoid disappointment.

Also, for some guys, getting "seriously laid" would be twice in a day, for other guys, it's ten times. Get it clear in advance.

To the OP - discuss it with your provider. Thoroughly. Good luck!

[MrReindeer-9515]

Who is this "we", you speak of? It's certainly not me, nor most guys, I've met, who participate in this.

Every guy is different, and that's why a lot of advice is cautionary. Details like sleeping arrangements, sexual frequency, food likes and dislikes, entertainment options, etc, etc, should be discussed before hand. Especially if you feel like you're "paying a huge fee". Avoid disappointment.

Also, for some guys, getting "seriously laid" would be twice in a day, for other guys, it's ten times. Get it clear in advance.

To the OP - discuss it with your provider. Thoroughly. Good luck!

The "we" seems to be a couple of misinformed neophytes that would like to apply their fucked up opinions to all participants.

In my experience, extended dates represent the "time and companionship" proviso, even more than the more standard one hour experience. I'm not buying a sex slave to pose face down/ass up for 48 hours, lest the urge strike me that I must fuck again.

As Luce(and others) said:for me it's more about spending a great deal of intimate, but not necessarily constantly sexual time with someone.

Edited August 17, 2014 by MrReindeer
Science! Punctuation, and spacing.

[NaughtyNiceGuy]

I would think what a hookers weekend rate is would determine what her expectations of playtime would be. But why would anyone want to spend a weekend with a hooker?

[gr8owl]

I would think what a hookers weekend rate is would determine what her expectations of playtime would be. But why would anyone want to spend a weekend with a hooker?

I have had the pleasure of knowing more than one that has wit, charm, intelligence, wonderful sense of humor and in general were a delightful kick in the ass to talk to and spend time with. Add to that they could and would at times screw my brains out. So why would I spend a weekend with one? Cause I could not afford a whole week!

By all means if you are into vapid and brainless but smoking hot babes for 30 minutes or less at a time and consider them somehow inferior, then by all means stay away from the weekend thing. Each to their own - there is a market for both and "providers" for both.

[inkspot]

You want to know what that empty feeling is?

Spend a weekend with a hooker and pretend that she is your girlfriend. When time is up on her clock, watch as she says "see ya" as the door hits you in the ass as you are leaving.

I do not buy into the quaint idea of paying for time and companionship either.

With the exception of Luce and Pfunk, I think most would agree with Pitt in his view of spending a weekend with a paid companion.

Do it if you must. Others have advised not to.

[Guest]

Let's keep in mind that some girlfriends and SOs are different than others. When I am in the early, passionate throes of a new relationship, I will likely "put out" quite a bit. Gosh, I hate even using the term put out, because that makes it sound like it's a favor I'm doing for the guy. It's not. It's a favor I do for myself. I. Enjoy. Sex. Some women do, even ones who aren't providers.

When I say I'm providing a girlfriend experience, I don't mean the sort of experience where you sit around the house and bicker and watch TV. I mean the most awesome girlfriend you've ever had. Or at least ranking up there. My time and companionship are worth a lot more than just getting your rocks off. Those who fail to understand that concept are probably not the sort of people who should be spending 48 hours with me.

[NaughtyNiceGuy]

I have spent extended periods of time with several hookers but off the clock as friends not as hooker and John.

[pitbull]

It's fascinating to find words twisted into pretzels even when they are WRITTEN DOWN. I write that expectations for sex are "quite a bit higher" with a paid weekend hooker than with an SO. This is somehow a controversial statement?

Then Luce makes the jump to "Fuck Fest" and Reindeer makes the jump to 48-hour sex slave, or words to that effect. It's a textbook example of the strawman logical fallacy, and av8r rightly points this out.

Luce says she "never provides when she is not feeling it." I'll take her at her word, but that is quite a bit different than most of us. I don't feel like selling widgets every day, but I go out and do it every day for money. I don't have the luxury of only working when I "feel it."

I would venture to guess that most hookers do not necessarily feel like fucking four strangers in a day, no matter how high the sex drive. They do it for money. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. I respect hookers the same as I respect all people who work for a living. As for not necessarily "working" when you feel like it, the same ethos applies to a weekend appointment. The sucking and fucking needs to be a priority, and I suspect that is the case for the majority of men who would attempt a weekend appt. I say it probably applies to "most" men, definitely not all.

Sorry, but I can get plenty of companionship, conversation, and actual "love" (how quaint) from my SO. She has a master's degree in English literature and is a fascinating woman -- and red hot in bed on a quarterly basis. Yes, I want a "connection" with a provider whenever possible, but I want that connection only because it makes the other stuff better. And I would not be there but for the "other stuff."

Inkspot hits the mark when he reminds us that when that weekend ends, the hooker is gone and she would have never ever even considered spending time with you but not for the cash. And yeah, the time and companionship bullshit, well, you can save that for somewhere else, but it has no room on TOB.

[MAG]

It's fascinating to find words twisted into pretzels even when they are WRITTEN DOWN. I write that expectations for sex are "quite a bit higher" with a paid weekend hooker than with an SO. This is somehow a controversial statement?

Then Luce makes the jump to "Fuck Fest" and Reindeer makes the jump to 48-hour sex slave, or words to that effect. It's a textbook example of the strawman logical fallacy, and av8r rightly points this out.

Luce says she "never provides when she is not feeling it." I'll take her at her word, but that is quite a bit different than most of us. I don't feel like selling widgets every day, but I go out and do it every day for money. I don't have the luxury of only working when I "feel it."

I would venture to guess that most hookers do not necessarily feel like fucking four strangers in a day, no matter how high the sex drive. They do it for money. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. I respect hookers the same as I respect all people who work for a living. As for not necessarily "working" when you feel like it, the same ethos applies to a weekend appointment. The sucking and fucking needs to be a priority, and I suspect that is the case for the majority of men who would attempt a weekend appt. I say it probably applies to "most" men, definitely not all.

Sorry, but I can get plenty of companionship, conversation, and actual "love" (how quaint) from my SO. She has a master's degree in English literature and is a fascinating woman -- and red hot in bed on a quarterly basis. Yes, I want a "connection" with a provider whenever possible, but I want that connection only because it makes the other stuff better. And I would not be there but for the "other stuff."

Inkspot hits the mark when he reminds us that when that weekend ends, the hooker is gone and she would have never ever even considered spending time with you but not for the cash. And yeah, the time and companionship bullshit, well, you can save that for somewhere else, but it has no room on TOB.

Well stated. Much more eloquent than I.

[parkercole]

I travel allot throughout the u.s. when traveling I'll have days of downtime. i have no issues booking a lady for a 24, 48, or 72 hour date. especially if she is a verified local favorite. I am lucky to have had many positive and amazing experiences! i can say the probability of my success with longer dates is doing research. board persona, reviews, menus, and communication with them gives me great insight of how the chemistry may play out.

all i can recommend is if you have a great rapport with your atf. feel free to ask the questions your curious about. and if the chemistry is already present. usually personal private time just happens naturally!

you have a better read of her and you than we know. so hopefully you'll be a great judge if you should go forward with her on a weekend get away......

[Bit Banger]

I've done a far amount of "extended" visits lately. They do NOT include wall-to-wall sex. As others have stated they are truly about spending time with someone with whom you enjoy spending time. Dinner, movies, museums, etc. are all on the agenda.

[pitbull]

I've done a far amount of "extended" visits lately. They do NOT include wall-to-wall sex. As others have stated they are truly about spending time with someone with whom you enjoy spending time. Dinner, movies, museums, etc. are all on the agenda.

Fair enough, Bit. I am baffled by the idea of an extended visit, but to each his own. However, let's just say that at the end of your date, you make your move and she says, "I have a headache" or simply turns the other way. Now let's say the same thing happens in the morning, and the following night. Do you let this just roll off your back, or do you think, "Hmmm. She is not doing her JOB." I suspect you might feel a bit cheated. And here we have the gigantic difference between an SO on a typical weekend and a "working" woman on a "working" weekend. And make no mistake, as congenial as the relationship may be, it is a "working" weekend.

[MAG]

as congenial as the relationship may be, it is a "working" weekend.

Yep, this statement is EXACTLY on point. If I'm paying a hooker, I'm not paying her to go to museums with me. She's there for one primary purpose, otherwise she wouldn't be called a "hooker".

Others have said that they pay a hooker to leave, as much as for any other reason. There's some truth to that, which makes me wonder why the hell anyone would want a whole weekend with one -- especially when she brings the attitude of "time & companionship only".

SMH.

[Lucy Kitten]

Yep, this statement is EXACTLY on point. If I'm paying a hooker, I'm not paying her to go to museums with me. She's there for one primary purpose, otherwise she wouldn't be called a "hooker".

Others have said that they pay a hooker to leave, as much as for any other reason. There's some truth to that, which makes me wonder why the hell anyone would want a whole weekend with one -- especially when she brings the attitude of "time & companionship only".

SMH.

Has it been a while since you have really trolled the board?? Tricks are for kids, at least that's what I have always heard.

Maybe you're not paying hookers to go to museums but plenty of escorts get those sorts of invitations. I have been paid to go to museums, movies, dinners, hikes and weekend travel. None of those gents had ridiculous expectations of their "hooker".

Here's the deal we offer a product, you can buy if you like it or you can move on if it's not for you. Stop with the expectation bullshit.

[Lucy Kitten]

'

It's fascinating to find words twisted into pretzels even when they are WRITTEN DOWN. I write that expectations for sex are "quite a bit higher" with a paid weekend hooker than with an SO. This is somehow a controversial statement?

Disagreement is not controversy. Maybe the guy that uses the word hooker so freely shouldn't be so bothered by someone possibly misconstruing his point. No one said controversy, maybe you shouldn't twist words.

Then Luce makes the jump to "Fuck Fest" and Reindeer makes the jump to 48-hour sex slave, or words to that effect. It's a textbook example of the strawman logical fallacy, and av8r rightly points this out.

Please explain then what putting out in spades means.

Luce says she "never provides when she is not feeling it." I'll take her at her word, but that is quite a bit different than most of us. I don't feel like selling widgets every day, but I go out and do it every day for money. I don't have the luxury of only working when I "feel it."

It is fucking amazing being able to do what I want when I want. It is different than a regular real world job so accept it. Suck dick for money and then we can compare professions, maybe then you can understand why we have the choices that we have.

I would venture to guess that most hookers do not necessarily feel like fucking four strangers in a day, no matter how high the sex drive. They do it for money. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. I respect hookers the same as I respect all people who work for a living. As for not necessarily "working" when you feel like it, the same ethos applies to a weekend appointment. The sucking and fucking needs to be a priority, and I suspect that is the case for the majority of men who would attempt a weekend appt. I say it probably applies to "most" men, definitely not all.

Keeping my date entertained is priority, not sucking and fucking. You have had Bit Banger and myself share our personal extended visit experiences and you totally overlook it. The majority of men that want a weekend date are seeking more than just lots of booty. Most of us are professional enough to no accept weekend long dates with someone we don't get along with to avoid that not wanting to work feeling.

Sorry, but I can get plenty of companionship, conversation, and actual "love" (how quaint) from my SO. She has a master's degree in English literature and is a fascinating woman -- and red hot in bed on a quarterly basis. Yes, I want a "connection" with a provider whenever possible, but I want that connection only because it makes the other stuff better. And I would not be there but for the "other stuff."

I think you're letting your personal experience blur the reality. Many of these men are not lacking just sex but also the companionship they desire from their SO hence all the guys that want the connection.

Inkspot hits the mark when he reminds us that when that weekend ends, the hooker is gone and she would have never ever even considered spending time with you but not for the cash. And yeah, the time and companionship bullshit, well, you can save that for somewhere else, but it has no room on TOB.

The provider has no control over your perceptions of the situation. If you want to believe that she is only there for the money it becomes really difficult to get you to believe otherwise. The majority of us quite enjoy what we do and would never commit to a weekend with someone we don't have a good rapport with. When the weekend is over we leave because it's the agreement, if there is a feeling of emptiness after it's a personal problem.

[pitbull]

That is all well and good, but when the museum date is over, along with the "companionship," and it's time to go to bed, any "lady of the evening" (hooker, courtesan, ASP, Geisha) knows what is expected of her.

My clients expect me to have good customer service and close the deal. I may play golf with them, go to lunch with them, but in the end they expect the service for which they have paid. Anything less is a ripoff.

[EuropeanMonger]

.

[pitbull]

Interesting perspective, AuroraMike. You acknowledge that a lack of a certain amount of sex would make you feel "cheated," and you acknowledge that two or three times a day was normal in such a situation. You also acknowledge that it's a business transaction. That all sounds perfectly reasonable, as well as the observation that this is not selling widgets. All agreed.

Again, I can't fathom going on a trip with a "provider," because I could never get past the fact that she is being paid to be there (something that does not bother me in the context of a one-hour tryst, and I accept that might be hypocritical). Others can get past that, but I could not. To each his own. Thanks for the interesting perspective, AuroraMike. Much appreciated.

One last question, Mike: Do you suspect that your companion on those trips ever had sex with you when she was not "in the mood"? If so, did that bother you? Or did you merely think, 'Well, it's part of her job to please me even when she is not 100% into it.' Please don't think I'm giving my blessings to any kind of "force" at all. I'm just talking about her giving you a maintenance blow job when she would instead rather read a book or lay by the pool.

I'm not passing judgment on you or her. I'm just curious.

[EuropeanMonger]

.

[Audrey Astor]

Fair enough, Bit. I am baffled by the idea of an extended visit, but to each his own. However, let's just say that at the end of your date, you make your move and she says, "I have a headache" or simply turns the other way. Now let's say the same thing happens in the morning, and the following night. Do you let this just roll off your back, or do you think, "Hmmm. She is not doing her JOB." I suspect you might feel a bit cheated. And here we have the gigantic difference between an SO on a typical weekend and a "working" woman on a "working" weekend. And make no mistake, as congenial as the relationship may be, it is a "working" weekend.

I think the caveat for you Pitbull, is that you do have that companion that you love and enjoy at home. You will tell anyone that will listen how much you love her, and what a great lady she is. The only thing missing is the SEX. That is not the case for some of these guys. Let's face it, it gets lonely always going home to an empty home, and companionship is nice. And.... a good portion of us ladies are educated, well versed, well rounded, tolerant of different types of people, compassionate, and easy to get along with. I am hearing some of these guys say that is what they are missing.... someone fun to do some things with, and have some awesome intimacy. You're just one of the lucky ones.

[Guest]

Holly is correct, as someone who had many multihours, and yes SHOCKER, a few with no sex involved, those men do exist. It is more common than people think. I made some good friends and enjoyed spending time on and off the clock with them.

I would only do an overnight with someone I got along with well, and had met prior. Usually they were dinner and a concert, and the dates just kind of flowed...I never felt pressure and always enjoyed myself with these gentlemen. Different people enjoy different things, and some men truly enjoy the intimacy and company of an attractive, intelligent woman in addition to the sexual aspect...