Am I wrong for denying?

[MsLeilaLovely]

Earlier I was trying to set an appointment, the man seemed nice enough but hits me with my pet peeve! He doesnt know how long he wants to stay and will decide when he gets here, anywhere from 45min to two hours. Which to me is is usually a sign he's going to go for the shorter session and wants priority because he "might" stay longer.
Get me?
Then i check out stats hes only been a member for a month, on the Site he's on and has given one review which wasn't the greatest. I know here on this site I don't have any reviews yet, as I am somewhat new to TOB but I surely am a seasoned provider [Snip}. So I felt I knew what to expect. I chose to not meet considering the circumstances. 
Am i wrong for denying this client? & If so, please let me know your opinion, ladies & gents!
Xoxo
Ms. Lovely

Edited March 29, 2016 by Kaduk
Font size and removed all tags (advertising)

[Guest]

It's your life, your body, and your business.  YOU get to decide what types of clients you want to see.  Sort of like your version of the "No shirt, no shoes, no service" sign you see at restaurants.

My personal feeling is the was probably a flake, but maybe just a newbie that didn't understand.  Try telling your lawyer to set aside two hours of his money-earning time, but you may only pay for 45 minutes.  Ha!

Now, having said that, there is a right way for the guy to do this if he has cash for a 2 hour appointment, but is truly afraid you may not click when you meet.  Schedule for 45, and if a goddess opens the door, ask at that time if you can instead pay for a 2 hour.  But you have to accept the risk that she may be busy and will have to turn you down.

[inkspot]

I would mention that your appointments are scheduled by the hour.  If he is uncertain, give him the choice of a 1 hr or 2 hr appointment.  Which do you choose?

If that does not work, then tell him to take a hike.

By the way,  large font appears that you are yelling.

[daaacz]

You're 100% right.  If you're not comfortable, move on.  Stay happy and stay safe.  There are many more guys out there who will respect your time. I'm sure I've raised providers' hackles in the past by saying something dumb.  It happens. If you can, just let us down easy. Maybe we'll be back once we've learned a thing or two.

Edited March 28, 2016 by daaacz
Details

[Lucy Kitten]

 

It's your life, your body, and your business.  YOU get to decide what types of clients you want to see.  Sort of like your version of the "No shirt, no shoes, no service" sign you see at restaurants.

My personal feeling is the was probably a flake, but maybe just a newbie that didn't understand.  Try telling your lawyer to set aside two hours of his money-earning time, but you may only pay for 45 minutes.  Ha!

Now, having said that, there is a right way for the guy to do this if he has cash for a 2 hour appointment, but is truly afraid you may not click when you meet.  Schedule for 45, and if a goddess opens the door, ask at that time if you can instead pay for a 2 hour.  But you have to accept the risk that she may be busy and will have to turn you down.

Newbies are the best. Real newbs not those that fake it so they can get away with BS.

I would have turned him down too. My least favorite kind of time waster, the I will decide in person if I want to or not. Next please. The right way to book a two hour appointment is to book two hours and pay for it. I will not let anyone decide once they're at my incall whether or not I am worth it. I have a life, some self esteem, and a schedule. Not clicking is a risk that is taken when meeting someone new. There are no test drives.

 

[Guest]

 

The right way to book a two hour appointment is to book two hours and pay for it. 

 

Luce, I expressed myself poorly, and I agree with your statement 100%

However, if the guy is just too cheap to do this, it is best to go with the "wow, you are even more awesome than I anticipated" approach rather than letting her know up front that you are a cheap-ass.

 

Personally, I would never do this.  However, there was one lady I exchanged emails with before our first date who came off as so much fun, that I asked if an increase in session length was possible ever before we met.

[Buddy Glass]

 

Luce, I expressed myself poorly, and I agree with your statement 100%

However, if the guy is just too cheap to do this, it is best to go with the "wow, you are even more awesome than I anticipated" approach rather than letting her know up front that you are a cheap-ass.

 

Personally, I would never do this.  However, there was one lady I exchanged emails with before our first date who came off as so much fun, that I asked if an increase in session length was possible ever before we met.

For the OP, it's never wrong to turn down an appointment. Any reason or no reason. It doesn't matter. Dudes are no more entitled to a session than a provider is entitled to a client. For the "test drive" Lucy is talking about, well, that's why many providers offer a half hour. Try out the experience, see if you click, and if you like it, you come back again another time.  It keeps everyone on the same page.

And you expressed yourself fine before. Everyone can always ask for what they want. That doesn't mean they'll get it, but they can ask. When I'm not sure about a girl, I book a half, have my little "test drive", and if it goes well, I book again for longer. That way, even if I had the time of my life, if she didn't enjoy it, she can decline to reschedule. 

[Lucy Kitten]

 

For the OP, it's never wrong to turn down an appointment. Any reason or no reason. It doesn't matter. Dudes are no more entitled to a session than a provider is entitled to a client. For the "test drive" Lucy is talking about, well, that's why many providers offer a half hour. Try out the experience, see if you click, and if you like it, you come back again another time.  It keeps everyone on the same page.

And you expressed yourself fine before. Everyone can always ask for what they want. That doesn't mean they'll get it, but they can ask. When I'm not sure about a girl, I book a half, have my little "test drive", and if it goes well, I book again for longer. That way, even if I had the time of my life, if she didn't enjoy it, she can decline to reschedule. 

Booking again is one thing. Test driving and taking 45 minutes of an appointment to decide the length of appointment you want to book is another. You are conflating two different scenarios. The OP and resulting comments were about a client not deciding until the session how much time he wants to spend. I am very aware of why ladies offer half hours. But the client of the OP doesn't seem to.

Did you read the OP or just want to disagree? Deciding the length of the session during the session is bad manners and guys really shouldn't ask for that kind of thing. You're not a service provider, take it from an actual provider what good policy is. There are limits to asking for what you want,  wanting to decide during the session how much time you want to book is outside of those limits.

 

 

 

[Guest]

This is really simple, if he cant commit to "What day, what time, how long he would like to book you for?"

Never let any client take up you time like this. Booking a maybe is NO NO. When someone else will book you.  

Its your pussy, its your time, you make the rules. 

Edited March 29, 2016 by Nikki Holiday

[Buddy Glass]

 

Booking again is one thing. Test driving and taking 45 minutes of an appointment to decide the length of appointment you want to book is another. You are conflating two different scenarios. The OP and resulting comments were about a client not deciding until the session how much time he wants to spend. I am very aware of why ladies offer half hours. But the client of the OP doesn't seem to.

Did you read the OP or just want to disagree? Deciding the length of the session during the session is bad manners and guys really shouldn't ask for that kind of thing. You're not a service provider, take it from an actual provider what good policy is. There are limits to asking for what you want,  wanting to decide during the session how much time you want to book is outside of those limits.

 

 

 

I mean, you have my whole post quoted, so I know it's there in front of you while typing. The first line of the post shows me agreeing with the OP. The rest of the post agrees with Laplace, saying people can ask for whatever and noting there's no guarantee they'll get it. I finish the post explaining (rather redundantly) that the 30 minute booking is the "test drive". The problem you have with my post is all in your head.  

"Did you read the OP or just want to disagree?"

The irony...

[jhooker]

As in all commerce there are always those people who think their money is hyper valuable and your product barely worth a look, and they are doing you a favor and you should give them a "deal". Fuck them. You set your own value. Especially in your business, it's your body. There is more to being a good client than money, there is hygene, cleanliness, manners, personality, respect, etc....if you feel like a guy is short on any of these it's your well being my dear, you decide and don't even think twice.

[Lucy Kitten]

 

I mean, you have my whole post quoted, so I know it's there in front of you while typing. The first line of the post shows me agreeing with the OP. The rest of the post agrees with Laplace, saying people can ask for whatever and noting there's no guarantee they'll get it. I finish the post explaining (rather redundantly) that the 30 minute booking is the "test drive". The problem you have with my post is all in your head.  

"Did you read the OP or just want to disagree?"

The irony...

What does booking a half hour have to do with a dude who wants to pick his session length during the appointment? Oh that was your interpretation of "test drive" even though I was pretty clearly referring to something else. If you commit to the session, the time and pay the money it's not really a test drive the details of the purchase were previously negotiated. A test drive would be he guy that wants to play with the toys before committing to the rate. Your idea of test drive is different than mine. You mentioned be by name and then continued on with your definition of test drive, that's disagreement albeit passive.

Dudes can think all they want about what they think is acceptable to ask but it doesn't make it right. I will say for the third time that asking if you can pick the session length during the session is unacceptable. If you have no filters then you can ask for whatever but if you have a little common sense some things you know to just not ask. And questions that include such disregard for a providers schedule and her personally are at the top of the list of things not to ask.

[SultryKitten]

This is kind of why I got rid of the lesser packages...mainly because it just added a lot of confusion, and I got tired of having to explain the different packages. Also, I was dealing with guys stating the same thing you are dealing with. 

You have to look at your business as" time and money". When you give a set time with a set price, that is what it is...no more, no less; not earlier or later. The reason is because if you give an inch, whether they intentionally mean to or not, they take a mile. We can all have fun during said time, but it still comes down to that they paid for an hour, not less not more. I also follow this: when I say 1PM, I am ready at 1PM. Now, I do understand that there is traffic, phone issues, etc. Those situations, I want to be kept informed of what is going on, and I do the same. Even though I keep a decent window clear for each client, I still have a personal life that I don't like to conflict with this side of my life. I am up front with my clients about it, and I respect theirs as well.

I don't feel you are in the wrong, I would have made that decision too, but we all conduct our businesses in our own way and have to do what is best for our situation. Do what feels right to you. :-)

xoxo,

Samantha Sheppard

[41SM]

On 3/28/2016 at 9:09 AM, MsLeilaLovely said:

Earlier I was trying to set an appointment, the man seemed nice enough but hits me with my pet peeve! He doesnt know how long he wants to stay and will decide when he gets here, anywhere from 45min to two hours. Which to me is is usually a sign he's going to go for the shorter session and wants priority because he "might" stay longer.
Get me?
Then i check out stats hes only been a member for a month, on the Site he's on and has given one review which wasn't the greatest. I know here on this site I don't have any reviews yet, as I am somewhat new to TOB but I surely am a seasoned provider [Snip}. So I felt I knew what to expect. I chose to not meet considering the circumstances. 
Am i wrong for denying this client? & If so, please let me know your opinion, ladies & gents!

Xoxo
Ms. Lovely

This gentlemen sounds like an extremely perspicacious individual and his indecisive behavior should be lauded, not maligned, since it's a tacit compliment . The lad obviously finds you to be ravishing but is reticent to commit to a prolonged appointment since he suspects your pictures might be too good to be true.

He's probably thinking something like the following "Golly gee wilikers! This is a beauteous, confident African American woman who looks like the Walking Dead actress Sonequa Martin! Unfortunately this young black stallion doesn't have any reviews on TOB. How can I possibly be sure that she's legit? Once I get to the Four Seasons instead of seeing a lady that looks like Sonequa Martin I might see some big old bitch that looks like Precious or Oprah. I don't want no hoe that looks like Oprah sucking my sword! I never got a boner while watching the god damn Oprah Winfrey show! My dick is burning up with jungle fever but I don't want no courtesan that looks like Precious being the one that helps my Excalibur sweat out its fever.  Hooking up with a bitch as big as Precious could harm my greater penile health. My johnson ain't equipped to handle that big of a load. I don't want an elephant jumping on my snake. Before I commit two hours to this chocolate wonderland I want to make sure this feisty panther isn't punking people with fake photos. If I get in there and this bitch looks like Whoopi Goldberg I'll let her give my shaft a little shine then politely leave after 45 minutes. If this Afro Aphrodite actually does look like Sonequa then I'm going to say "Thank you Jesus" and my God shit is going to be of the chain for two hours!" 

You're a  seasoned provider but you're a stranger in Colorado. This fellow might have been burned in the past by miscreants who used false pictures and he just wants to make sure that you are who you say you are. I say you see this fine fellow and fulfill his Walking Dead sexual fantasy.  

 

[Paul Pudenda]

No, you're not wrong.  He sounds like a bit of a pin head.  Besides knowing the services a client seeks, he should at least know how long he wants to stay.  I usually set a first appointment for a half-hour to determine "compatibility".  If things go well, I'll ask if the lady is free for another half.  If not, no harm/no foul, and I'll schedule an hour next time.  If yes, this is the beginning of a beautiful thing.

Edited March 30, 2016 by Paul Pudenda

[gr8owl]

So ...... he wants to reserve two whole hours of your time but may bail after 45 and expect you to be good with the insult that you aren't worth staying for and accept pay for only the 45 minutes even though you are out two hours??   Place him immediately on the flaming dip shit, no way in hell ever schedule list and move on.  Sounds like someone you would not want to see.

As others have said, not being sure is understandable.  Simple - schedule half the time you usually would prefer, go, try to enjoy, pay the lady and return for more if you like.  But for the love  of whatever you hold dear, show some frickin' consideration and respect.

[ajot]

On 3/28/2016 at 9:09 AM, MsLeilaLovely said:

Earlier I was trying to set an appointment, the man seemed nice enough but hits me with my pet peeve! He doesnt know how long he wants to stay and will decide when he gets here, anywhere from 45min to two hours. Which to me is is usually a sign he's going to go for the shorter session and wants priority because he "might" stay longer.
Get me?
Then i check out stats hes only been a member for a month, on the Site he's on and has given one review which wasn't the greatest. I know here on this site I don't have any reviews yet, as I am somewhat new to TOB but I surely am a seasoned provider [Snip}. So I felt I knew what to expect. I chose to not meet considering the circumstances. 
Am i wrong for denying this client? & If so, please let me know your opinion, ladies & gents!
Xoxo
Ms. Lovely

You are not wrong to reject anything that seems sketchy. Certainly fine to say you only have time for exact appointments, which time would you like.

On the other hand, if you have open schedules and the guy seems more legit, you might consider it. I have thought before, and tried again the "I would like an hour but might like to be able to go 90 min if you happen to have a day/time where that would work." Most providers say "would you like 60 or 90, pick." There have been a time or two when I asked for 30 then 60 if we click... And each time I left at the lesser time because they were HORRIBLE. The others that told me to pick an exact were very worth it. Then there are the annoying times when you don't ask for the option cause they are likely to turn you down - and the longer time would have been great!

So really it's just all over the place and you're right to stick to your gut feeling. Especially with your example I won't say you were wrong even if you possibly lost out on a great 2 hour appointment.

[Guest]

Not  wrong at all. I would have done the same thing. Some men need to realize that being accepted for a visit is a privilege and not an obligation. 

[Guest]

4 minutes ago, Leigh5280 said:

Not  wrong at all. I would have done the same thing. Some men need to realize that being accepted for a visit is a privilege and not an obligation. 

At first glance, a lot of guys would consider this response "uppity."

However, the choosier providers, in my experience, tend to provide better quality service because they limit their clientel to gentlemen with whom they expect compatibility.

If a provider tells you "no," she may be doing you a favor.  Not because you are bad, or she is bad, but because she has picked up on things that did not work well for her in the past.

One of those "things" may be guys that don't know what they want.

[BadBoy]

Oh, so we find that 41SM, in addition to being a dolt, is a racist.  Sometimes I just sign on to give negative reputation points, like today.

[Guest]

There's a less than okay number of guys who are just pulling crap that lets us know exactly how unimportant our time is compared to theirs, and I'm having to turn down people who are trying to jerk me around too.  Like...Really? Cancel on me last minute, and then act all uncomfortable and call me a loose cannon because I'm not too excited to let you tell me to just be available from 12-6 in case you feel like doing what you said you would? 

Just do what's right for you, and for me it's to not be mistreated by people who think that little of my time.

Edited March 31, 2016 by B_randy
Screwed up

[Bit Banger]

11 minutes ago, B_randy said:

There's a less than okay number of guys who are just pulling crap that lets us know exactly how unimportant our time is compared to theirs, and I'm having to turn down people who are trying to jerk me around too.  Like...Really? Cancel on me last minute, and then act all uncomfortable and call me a loose cannon because I'm not too excited to let you tell me to just be available from 12-6 in case you feel like doing what you said you would? 

Just do what's right for you, and for me it's to not be mistreated by people who think that little of my time.

Hey, Randy, what's your problem being available from 12-6?

Are you sure this isn't his problem. Can he afford that service?

6hrs X $y/HR= $????  Sounds like payday to me. 😜

[Western ~P]

MsLL, I would have told him 'go play with somebody else' CLICK!