Posted February 12, 2015 I think that the screening part of the hobby has always been the most difficult task at hand. So guys I would like to here from you what you deem appropriate for the verification steps that a provider should take. If you feel that there shouldn't be any at all why or why not. I have always thought the oh I need to be discrete comment interesting because if you don't do your home work on your provider and who you are see it will only be a matter of time before your name comes up outta the hat. I think it only works if we all work together. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 I think one reference should be sufficient. If you're able to confirm that the lone reference is indeed a provider that has seen the client, what more do you need to know? Asking for my real name and place of employment is an absolute deal breaker. I've encountered providers who mandate that because they see the client at their home. That's understandable, but that's not for me. In the end, I think everyone has taken a leap of faith at some point. Clients have seen providers with no reviews, and providers have seen clients without checking references or even asking for them. It makes the world go round, otherwise you'd run out of both clients and providers. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 I actually get a little concerned if a provider DOESN'T ask me any screening questions. Makes me wonder, "LE"? And then you have the girls that ask if I am LE. Like LE would say. 'Well gee you figured me out, guess I'll move on". I like if they ask for my P411 credentials. That helps me feel like they are being careful about who they see. And they know I am legit. Or maybe they ask if I am a T.O.B. member. I can then tell them to research my reviews. What I don't like so much is having her ask for references of ladies I have seen. What if the lady(s) don't remember me or can't be reached or don't want to be bothered? I agree Yesenia, guys do your homework on the providers. Read their ads carefully for screening requirements. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 I like if they ask for my P411 credentials. That helps me feel like they are being careful about who they see. This bothers me. If they are on p411, I will send a request through there and they can get my credentials that way. But I never just give my credentials out. Especially if I don't know if they are on there. I don't need somebody running around with that info that isn't on p411. And if they are on there, sending a request lets them know that is actually who I am. That being said, that is why I am in p411. So screening is easy, for both parties. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 "If they are on p411, I will send a request through there and they can get my credentials that way" I don't know HOW many times I have sent a request directly thru P411 and gotten NO response! "But I never just give my credentials out. Especially if I don't know if they are on there" "I don't need somebody running around with that info that isn't on p411." And the only way I give out that info is IF the lady IS a P411 member! 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 I think that the screening part of the hobby has always been the most difficult task at hand. So guys I would like to here from you what you deem appropriate for the verification steps that a provider should take. If you feel that there shouldn't be any at all why or why not. I have always thought the oh I need to be discrete comment interesting because if you don't do your home work on your provider and who you are see it will only be a matter of time before your name comes up outta the hat. I think it only works if we all work together. Hobby name. Hobby email. Hobby phone number. References. P411 account. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 " I don't know HOW many times I have sent a request directly thru P411 and gotten NO response! I will send a request through P411, then call/email through their other contact means mentioning I sent the message. If they don't respond that way, move on the the next lady. To many "fine, upstanding" "providers" that have outed a guy for BS reasons. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 Hobby name. Yes, but not the same as my board or review personality, which can lead to drama. Hobby email. Yes. My preferred method of contact. Not tied to my board personality. Hobby phone number. Yes References.Yes, but ONLY when seeing a non-P411 listed lady, which I rarely do. P411 account.Yes. Contact by email first to introduce myself, followed by a formal date request through P411for my bonafides. Boink has it right, but I'm a little more cautious since being burned. If this is not good enough, I apologize for taking up the ladies time and move on. Question back to the lovely Yesenia: When contacted thru P411, why don't the ladies avail themselves of the wealth of info I've posted about myself? About half of the ladies I contact this way just see my 25+ ok listing and say yes without ever checking my profile. A quarter say yes after looking at my profile. Interestingly, the remaing quarter not only examine my profile, but screen deeply enough to find my blacklisting. Half of those contact me for an explanation, and agree to see me upon getting it. The other half just never respond again. I've never failed to get an ok from a lady I've seen, including the little lady who put me on the list. It would seem that some ladies screening process is producing false negatives. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 Here is my question, you guys don't want to give personal info because of certain ladies and their indiscretions so why are ladies supposed to rely on other ladies for references? If you don't trust them why should we? 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 Here is my question, you guys don't want to give personal info because of certain ladies and their indiscretions so why are ladies supposed to rely on other ladies for references? If you don't trust them why should we? Good question. There must be some ladies you trust. Surely you would accept references from them? I'm just guessing, but having a good peer-to-peer relationships with other members of your provider community would seem to be very important. If you poisoned that relationship in any way, I can see where it would make using references much more difficult and dangerous. Ultimately, everyone must do what they need to feel safe. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 I have always found the LE question amusing. LE is trained to lie. They can lie to you, but if you lie to them it is a crime. That said, I have no problem with the question. Maybe it is possible to detect LE in some cases by a reaction to the question. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 Hobby name. Hobby email. Hobby phone number. References. P411 account. This. But I don't use a fake name, nor do I have a separate phone number. I'll never give out my last name, address, or employment info. It's NEVER been an issue. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 I think that the screening part of the hobby has always been the most difficult task at hand. So guys I would like to here from you what you deem appropriate for the verification steps that a provider should take. If you feel that there shouldn't be any at all why or why not. I have always thought the oh I need to be discrete comment interesting because if you don't do your home work on your provider and who you are see it will only be a matter of time before your name comes up outta the hat. I think it only works if we all work together. Screening is a pain in my ass. And, frankly, it's almost never worth it to me to bother with someone who needs it. I avoid all providers who need heavy screening (e.g., drivers license, business card, Facebook page, p411 account (which I don't have and which I am not going to get)). I don't even contact those providers. Saves us both some time. Occasionally, a provider comes along who looks sufficiently awesome to me that I will try and work with her on whatever *light* screening requirements will suffice for both of us. That usually means me emailing her names and phone numbers of 2 or 3 past providers. Even that is more work than I want to do, and so I really only bother when the lady in question is someone I just really, really want to see. Now, to be clear. I think each provider has a 100% right to require any and all screening that she needs to feel comfortable in this crazy business. If you need it, you have every right to ask. But I, for one, won't be calling you. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 I think that the screening part of the hobby has always been the most difficult task at hand. So guys I would like to here from you what you deem appropriate for the verification steps that a provider should take. If you feel that there shouldn't be any at all why or why not...I think it only works if we all work togetherThere is no right or wrong way for ladies to screen, however, guys will either accept a ladies screening method and provide info, or get pissy and move on. This may not be popular amongst the hard legs, but I think it's up to us gents to make sure the lady feels comfortable in whatever method she chooses to screen if they truly want to see her. If she's requiring more info what guys feel comfortable providing, they will move along. As far as multiple handles on TOB/Reviews and other boards, I just don't get it with the drama comments. If you're worried about retaliation of a bad review...don't review her! If you're worried that she will share your info with many others...don't see her. There is some give and take but if a lady or gent doesn't feel comfortable in seeing each other...DON'T SEE EACH OTHER!!! 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 I've hobbied hundreds of times over the last few years and rarely get asked screening questions. When I bring up the subject I tell them my TOB handle and say they can contact any of the ladies I have reviewed for a reference. I've never been denied an appointment for lack of screening info. I've never been asked my last name or where I worked or for any other information along those lines. I don't have a p411 account. I always initiate appointments over the phone so I guess I have an honest voice on the phone. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 If you are going to post on Backpage and you do, you need to do a lite screening and not the inspections and background checks 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 12, 2015 mehhh. screening is just a part of this gig. it sucks for me when I travel throughout most of the year and come back home with great time lapses between ladies. then it becomes difficult when I want to see a new lady. but I get it. I also screen on my end as well. when going to another city I have to see if the lady has reviews and a hospitable history. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 13, 2015 do what you need to do to hobby safe - bottom line... I like screening - when done right - with hobby handle and hobby phone and hobby email, and pm and etc... these boards can help providers entertain safe dates... I have had providers ask me for home address, another phone number and or email and an office address - which I declined and moved on... When I want to see a courtesan her I read her reviews and often times will pm another member who has been around for enough reviews to do my own check up - I would expect the ladies to do the same... 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 13, 2015 +1 Laplace, I agree I think the ladies should take the time to read about the gentleman's likes and dislikes. If contacted thru P411 as long as they have the number of okays that I require then that is good for me. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 13, 2015 Wow Pejo good luck to you I hope it all ends well. Sufficiently awesome now thats a statement hmmm makes no sense 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 13, 2015 Wow Pejo good luck to you I hope it all ends well. Sufficiently awesome now thats a statement hmmm makes no sense Wow. Thanks. Yes, things have been ending quite well. Happily, even. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 13, 2015 I think one reference should be sufficient. If you're able to confirm that the lone reference is indeed a provider that has seen the client, what more do you need to know? Some providers give bad references on purpose just so you can book anyone else. Now your stuck seeing the same girl. Not by your choice. This one reference is bad idea. Asking for my real name and place of employment is an absolute deal breaker. I've encountered providers who mandate that because they see the client at their home. That's understandable, but that's not for me. Good don't give out your information. In the end, I think everyone has taken a leap of faith at some point. Clients have seen providers with no reviews, and providers have seen clients without checking references or even asking for them. It makes the world go round, otherwise you'd run out of both clients and providers.This is true 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 14, 2015 There is also the old adage, "You get what you 'pay' for." Not all payment is in coin-of-the-realm. If you don't want to provide a bunch of information, try Colfax. You might be able to get your willie wet w/o providing your SSN. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 14, 2015 I think that the screening part of the hobby has always been the most difficult task at hand. So guys I would like to here from you what you deem appropriate for the verification steps that a provider should take. If you feel that there shouldn't be any at all why or why not. I have always thought the oh I need to be discrete comment interesting because if you don't do your home work on your provider and who you are see it will only be a matter of time before your name comes up outta the hat. I think it only works if we all work together. I'm an open book. If I have read reviews and decided to contact you, I've already made the decision that I trust you. At that point I'll tell a provider as much as they would like to know. I've emailed a pic of my driver's license before. If you think about it, either party could make trouble for the other if they chose too. But there's little motivation for that. If I have any sense that you might, you'll never hear from me in the first place. However, I do ask that they not contract my employer. If you have my name, it's pretty easy to verify what I do for a living. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 14, 2015 When I started doing this (1980s), you had to give a home phone number, address, and full name, to most escorts (long before the internet existed). Otherwise, you weren't even gonna find out what part of town she was in. Some even required a paycheck stub. These days, I understand being more cautious. But if she asks you a question that you don't want to answer, tell her. If it's a deal breaker, for either party, move on. Lastly, don't get huffy on the phone; that's sure not gonna convince her to to see you. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 14, 2015 Sorry, but no way am I going to get a p411 too much personal info exposed. Also, I would not mind giving refs, but way too much drama between providers. Too many,clIcks going on, it is not all professional. And providers come and go pretty quickly. Bottom line is if the say more than one ref I do not call. Usually it us not a great time anyway. And, if they want refs they should state that in the add , not after someone calls. They have my phone number and name along with how I act in the on the phone. If that is not enough, then oh well. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 15, 2015 P411 creeps me out too. If that's a deal breaker for someone, so be it. I have no idea who I'm sending that information to. An individual that I can research and feel good about is one thing. But something that big sure smells like a target to me. If LE wanted to round up a load of people, seems like they'd be getting whatever they need to demand info from P411. I know one name they won't find if they do. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 15, 2015 I'm an open book. If I have read reviews and decided to contact you, I've already made the decision that I trust you. At that point I'll tell a provider as much as they would like to know. I've emailed a pic of my driver's license before. If you think about it, either party could make trouble for the other if they chose too. But there's little motivation for that. If I have any sense that you might, you'll never hear from me in the first place. However, I do ask that they not contract my employer. If you have my name, it's pretty easy to verify what I do for a living. I highly encourage you to keep doing this as often as you can! sooner or later your tragedy will be another shining example I use when I tell guys to never give out their personal information for any reason. the other new guys in the hobby who learn from your mistake will definitely appreciate your sacrifice. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 15, 2015 Meh. We'll see. I don't get out much. I guarantee if you took a poll of the providers here, the consensus would be "Who's that guy?" It's not like I'm sharing this stuff with a lot of people. And I trust the ones I do. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 15, 2015 Meh. We'll see. I don't get out much. I guarantee if you took a poll of the providers here, the consensus would be "Who's that guy?" It's not like I'm sharing this stuff with a lot of people. And I trust the ones I do. Me. I'm that guy. And all I did was post something the lady didn't like. Listen to Boink. He knows. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
