Posted July 1, 2019 Hello TOB .. Ladies, Gentleman. I like to consider myself professional and discrete using good business practices, big on privacy and discretion.!!!!!! I have met a lot of great people and TOB helped me to grow. So excuse me for taking so long to get to the point I was hoping someone could give me some advice on how to deal with the issue of BLACKMAIL . Was dating someone who got to know me on a very personal level., (m so naive) once I was ready to move on the person began to blackmail me threatening to send pictures of my ads to my Job and my leasing office for my apartment, the threats got worse and I got tired of it so I obtained a restraining order., I even moved across town. Now that I am no longer playing his game by his rules he has decided to try his best to sabotage me., Posting fake ads on low budget sites spreading crazy rumors.. even hacking into my email account and obtaining my contacts and contacting people at random saying awful things that I don't even want to repeat. Now with all that being said I would like to apologize deeply for anyone that may have been affected by this. Also please know that I have taken extreme preventive measures to ensure that all information remains completely confidential. Now with that being said what can I do to fix the situation and gain back peoples trust; Anyone.... any advice? I've worked hard just to have it taken away by false information. THIS ISN'T JUST EMBARRASSING BUT ITS DEVASTATING AS WELL!!!!!! 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 1, 2019 I have seen you in the past I look forward to linking up again sometime soon! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 1, 2019 (edited) Woman: reaches out for advice on a personal and trying situation that threatens her safety and sense of well-being along with her family, friends and contacts. Internet Guy: Responds with single sentence invitation/hope to reconnect with Boner needs. ??? No, serious Lexx, that sucks... I'd lock down your internet security, glad that you moved...and refer to any issues he breaks with the restraining order. ....and most of all....keep yourself Safe. Sometimes rebranding might be in order if you can't disappear for a while. But Stay Safe. Too many providers that i've known or known of that have dealt with some horrible and sometimes potentially dangerous stuff.. My heart goes out to all. Edited July 1, 2019 by MelindaMadison spelling 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 1, 2019 Melinda: I think Stang was just trying to say the guys in springs know her well and will not let some ass wipe stop them from seeing her. Could be wrong. Lexx: keep your head up, do not give in to any demand, do report threats and illegal activities against you to le. You have a bunch of great reviews and a good reputation. Perhaps a dear asshole letter from an attorney. One asshole trying to ruin it will not succeed. Please share liberally via pm with the ladies here as to who this jackass is. Ladies may have much better suggestions for dealing with him. I am sorry this is happening to you and wish you the best. 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 1, 2019 1 hour ago, gr8owl said: Please share liberally via pm with the ladies here as to who this jackass is. Ladies may have much better suggestions for dealing with him. I am sorry this is happening to you and wish you the best. The guy is obviously not sane. He is trying to ruin someone else's life. Unfortunately, he'll probably need to be arrested, and jailed. That may not even stop him. He's clearly obsessed. Lexxx, if I can help, I'd be happy to. I suspect lot's of guys would. I'm glad you're reaching out! 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 1, 2019 (edited) 14 hours ago, Lexxx said: Hello TOB .. Ladies, Gentleman. I like to consider myself professional and discrete using good business practices, big on privacy and discretion.!!!!!! I have met a lot of great people and TOB helped me to grow. So excuse me for taking so long to get to the point I was hoping someone could give me some advice on how to deal with the issue of BLACKMAIL . Was dating someone who got to know me on a very personal level., (m so naive) once I was ready to move on the person began to blackmail me threatening to send pictures of my ads to my Job and my leasing office for my apartment, the threats got worse and I got tired of it so I obtained a restraining order., I even moved across town. Now that I am no longer playing his game by his rules he has decided to try his best to sabotage me., Posting fake ads on low budget sites spreading crazy rumors.. even hacking into my email account and obtaining my contacts and contacting people at random saying awful things that I don't even want to repeat. Now with all that being said I would like to apologize deeply for anyone that may have been affected by this. Also please know that I have taken extreme preventive measures to ensure that all information remains completely confidential. Now with that being said what can I do to fix the situation and gain back peoples trust; Anyone.... any advice? I've worked hard just to have it taken away by false information. THIS ISN'T JUST EMBARRASSING BUT ITS DEVASTATING AS WELL!!!!!! Lexxx, so sorry this is happening to you. Not sure what advice to give other than keep any texts or emails that you could use, should you have to go the legal route. Maybe an attorney could give legal advice that could help keep you safe. I'm glad you are reaching out, because having someone(s) to talk to about this can be helpful. This kind of criminal attack can have so many ramifications and repercussions...financially, with your housing situation and emotionally. I hope you are able to get the range of help you deserve and come out of this on the other side in an okay way...with your head up and your life back so somewhat normal. Whatever you do, take care of yourself and let others help. Things like this make me feel both angry and sad because they should never happen to anyone, especially someone who is part of our community. Edited July 1, 2019 by average1 Change some wording. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 2, 2019 Lexxx, I'm sorry you are going through this. It can feel so isolating, but just know of all the providers I've met, all but one has a simiar story to share. Always think of the worst possible scenarios and have a plan in place, so if something does happen you are as prepared as possible to handle it. Changing location was a smart choice, also changing your number and keeping it private would be another wise choice. I switched my email to protonmail an encrypted email, and it allows me to block IP addresses as well. I also ignore any messages that are not strictly professional, so if you're getting threatening/harassing msgs, I ignore them, and move on to the next msg. It's as easy as swatting away a fly. I give them zero thought or power in my life. Fires need oxygen to grow. Give him none. We learn lessons the hard way sometimes, but we do learn them, and grow from them. Feel free to reach out. I don't know what I would have done without my girls here. They listened ro me freakout, cry, yell, whatever, but they were there, and I got through it, and they got through theirs to when it happened to them. You will too. Sending you lots of love and hugs and support Lexxx. 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 2, 2019 7 minutes ago, Hunter VanDyke said: . I also ignore any messages that are not strictly professional, so if you're getting threatening/harassing msgs, I ignore them, and move on to the next msg. It's as easy as swatting away a fly. I give them zero thought or power in my life. This is the only portion of Hunter’s advice with which I’d disagree. Save all those nasty messages to a safe place. They may give you ammunition & power should things take a legal route. Sorry this happened to you. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 2, 2019 1 minute ago, Bit Banger said: This is the only portion of Hunter’s advice with which I’d disagree. Save all those nasty messages to a safe place. They may give you ammunition & power should things take a legal route. Sorry this happened to you. Ignoring doesn't mean deleting, it just means go to the next msg in your inbox. The msg is still there. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 2, 2019 10 minutes ago, Hunter VanDyke said: Ignoring doesn't mean deleting, it just means go to the next msg in your inbox. The msg is still there. OK. It’s so tempting to delete them as one moves on. I just wanted to caution against that. Not letting them get under your skin, while difficult, is the right course. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 2, 2019 51 minutes ago, Hunter VanDyke said: Lexxx, I'm sorry you are going through this. It can feel so isolating, but just know of all the providers I've met, all but one has a simiar story to share. Always think of the worst possible scenarios and have a plan in place, so if something does happen you are as prepared as possible to handle it. Changing location was a smart choice, also changing your number and keeping it private would be another wise choice. I switched my email to protonmail an encrypted email, and it allows me to block IP addresses as well. I also ignore any messages that are not strictly professional, so if you're getting threatening/harassing msgs, I ignore them, and move on to the next msg. It's as easy as swatting away a fly. I give them zero thought or power in my life. Fires need oxygen to grow. Give him none. We learn lessons the hard way sometimes, but we do learn them, and grow from them. Feel free to reach out. I don't know what I would have done without my girls here. They listened ro me freakout, cry, yell, whatever, but they were there, and I got through it, and they got through theirs to when it happened to them. You will too. Sending you lots of love and hugs and support Lexxx. Well said, Hunter! Well said....and Lexxx, I’m truly sorry this has happened to you... some fucking guys just piss me off the way they treat ladies... the same should be done to them... or worse 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 2, 2019 Situations like this I hear just sometimes remind me of several years back when I pulled up to my mothers home I saw the sonofabitch she was dating yelling at her and he forcefully went at her... I had to be held back.... 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 2, 2019 Reading back on my response I realize it was not sympathetic! So I apologize! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 2, 2019 How does that old saying go about blackmail? "You can only ever rent silence, not buy it?" In Denver many years ago, there was a court case about an outed sex worker who sued the person who leaked the info to work, friends, and family, and if I remember right she won big bucks. Ahh here it is, 1.7 million dollars awarded. https://denver.cbslocal.com/2017/05/12/invasion-of-privacy-escort/ . Maybe even sending this asshole the link to the story might be enough to get him to shut up and let it go. 6 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
