Security

[Mchave45]

So I've been having an odd experience today, trying to communicate with a provider. Let me start by saying I respect privacy and safety in the utmost. I'm not so much whining, as trying to fully understand.

A provider is in town that I missed the last time she was here. I saw an opportunity to try to set up a time to see her and sent her an email. Unwittingly I sent it from a email address that isn't the same as on my p411. I honestly never even thought about it. All of my email addies are very similar (probably not the greatest idea for security, fixing that now) so it is very easy to confuse them, plus no one else has ever had an issue if I emailed from a different account.

So I receive a rather terse reply saying that I need to send an email from the same as on p411, and that I'm coming across as suspicious. This is after trading texts and sending a PM on on p411 as well just giving aheads up that I sent an email (I guess I believe in redundancy in the communication front).

Okay, I think, no problem. I set up my p411 a few years ago and honestly didn't think to check what email I used when I set it up. So send a new email from what I think is the correct addy. I get another reply saying that this is also the wrong email, and that I'm really not looking good. Another strike and I'm out.

Like I said I completely understand the need for safety. However in my mind I haven't done anything to be suspicious about. Sure the emails isn't whats on p411, but how else would I be able to send her a pm on p411 if I wasn't me? Isn't that the point of the damn site? It verifies you, not to mention I'm not some damn newbie. I have a dozen okays from reputable women on there.

I guess I'm just curious if this is a common occurrence? In my years of hobby-ing I haven't been held to this much suspicion since I was a newbie.

[crazyb]

This is interesting to me, last week I sent a text to a provider to a provider that I was interested in seeing. Only to get back a text calling me an Officer and telling me she would not see me. As I tried to give her references she was polite but very suspicious of me because we were unable to set up an appointment over a year ago.

I guess there's no being able change some people's minds

[boink36]

So I've been having an odd experience today, trying to communicate with a provider. Let me start by saying I respect privacy and safety in the utmost. I'm not so much whining, as trying to fully understand.

A provider is in town that I missed the last time she was here. I saw an opportunity to try to set up a time to see her and sent her an email. Unwittingly I sent it from a email address that isn't the same as on my p411. I honestly never even thought about it. All of my email addies are very similar (probably not the greatest idea for security, fixing that now) so it is very easy to confuse them, plus no one else has ever had an issue if I emailed from a different account.

So I receive a rather terse reply saying that I need to send an email from the same as on p411, and that I'm coming across as suspicious. This is after trading texts and sending a PM on on p411 as well just giving aheads up that I sent an email (I guess I believe in redundancy in the communication front).

Okay, I think, no problem. I set up my p411 a few years ago and honestly didn't think to check what email I used when I set it up. So send a new email from what I think is the correct addy. I get another reply saying that this is also the wrong email, and that I'm really not looking good. Another strike and I'm out.

I would say two strikes and she is out. call another provider who wants the business. if she has this kind of attitude now, what attitude will she have when she opens the door? there is no shortage of providers who will see a P411 guy with several ok's.

[Guest]

I feel your pain. I have lots of P411 Okays and I've been a member for several years. Still some folks are antsy and ask for more verification. I guess some LE folks are spending the money to become members of P411 and trolling (and I mean troll in the unkindest way).

I guess we have to be careful, too. When some asks me if I'm LE, I typically answer: "Absolutely not in any way, shape, or form! Are you?" That usually gets a giggle and relaxed conversation follows.

[Guest]

Oh Boink, you reminded me of a weird encounter regarding attitude when opening the door:

In my early hobby days I used to travel a lot. One night I invited a sweet, young thing to my hotel room. When she arrived I was surprised to see a stunning blonde. (I know, only in your dreams.) She recited some LE-avoidance questions and I provided the text-book answers.

We got comfortable and then, out of the blue, she ask me what was in my suitcase. My answer wasn't good enough so I opened it to show her it was empty and had no hidden compartments. She then asked if she could look around the room. I said: "Sure... and don't forget to look in the closet." Well, being a wise-ass is not the best thing to do with a young, inexperienced, nervous lady. She put on a few clothes and checked out the room.

By then the magic was gone. She was on edge and, frankly, I was too. She was so stunning that I didn't want to give up on her. So I said: "Look, this isn't working for either of us. Could you come back tomorrow night and we'll start all over?" She agreed and, to my utter astonishment, she did return. The closet door and my suitcase were open. She had a good belly laugh and we had a wonderful time.

[pfunk]

I guess I'm just curious if this is a common occurrence? In my years of hobby-ing I haven't been held to this much suspicion since I was a newbie.

I can't tell you whether it's a common occurrence. It's never happened to me. I will suggest this:

If she's on P411, start with an appointment request from P411, and call letting her know you sent one. Then communicate via P411, or a method (phone, email) connected to P411, only.

Using two email addresses, and not the one connected to P411, would look funny to me, especially after the P411 PM. Just looks odd.

That's my opinion. Good Luck!

[Yogi]

I recently ran into a provider who wasn't satisfied with my Okay's on P411. She said they were out-of-date and they were. So I asked a few providers to re-Okay me, which they did. But, this wasn't satisfactory & she wanted a work number for more screening -- which of course means real name.

So, I declined. It is obviously up to her to screen to her comfort level and more power to her. But, from my point of view, all I could see that her having my personal information was as a time bomb.

While there is that small first time thrill of "Who's behind Door #1," that is where I want to leave those kinds of thrills -- there are other better experiences to focus on.

I guess at the end of the day this is still an endeavor with a lot of risk and not terribly great ways to mitigate it. She wants a greater feeling of safety but at the expense of my comfort level. So, it didn't work out. Everyone moves along.

I can't tell you whether it's a common occurrence. It's never happened to me. I will suggest this:

If she's on P411, start with an appointment request from P411, and call letting her know you sent one. Then communicate via P411, or a method (phone, email) connected to P411, only.

Using two email addresses, and not the one connected to P411, would look funny to me, especially after the P411 PM. Just looks odd.

That's my opinion. Good Luck!

[MAG]

Everyone moves along.

Exactly.

Never let a hooker criticize you for not being willing to pass this kind of screening. If she does, just say "I'll show you mine if you show me yours."

Ultimately, it's your money. Take it elsewhere.

[Guest]

This is interesting to me, last week I sent a text to a provider to a provider that I was interested in seeing. Only to get back a text calling me an Officer and telling me she would not see me. As I tried to give her references she was polite but very suspicious of me because we were unable to set up an appointment over a year ago.

I guess there's no being able change some people's minds

This sounds like something I would do to you.

If you contact me and ask about rates or services. Instead of blacklisting you, I will automatically assume you are law enforcement or that you have been busted and now been compromised. With the intention of trying to bust me. Also sending a text message is a legal document. Then what I do is give you a referral to TOB, so the uneducated can educate themselves on hiring hookers the right way. I do this incase your not vice.

[Jez UaBriain]

[/sizeThis is a good thread to have. Let me start off with this.

It is human nature to be nervous when meeting someone for the first time. Compound that with most meetings being in hotels, and the fact that you are about to get naked with a complete stranger?. It is easy to be a little on edge. Let?s face it, most of my clients know far more about me, then I do them.

Personally, I could really care less about your real life identity. What I do care about is my freedom, my personal resume (no prostitution charges against my good name). And that you like to fuck, suck as much as I do. So if you are asked what you do for a living, I would think you could answer pretty quickly and easily. Phone conversations we listen carefully. If there is a lot of back ground noise my hoe-dar is going to be alerted.

]

[Guest]

I recently ran into a provider who wasn't satisfied with my Okay's on P411. She said they were out-of-date and they were. So I asked a few providers to re-Okay me, which they did. But, this wasn't satisfactory & she wanted a work number for more screening -- which of course means real name.

So, I declined. It is obviously up to her to screen to her comfort level and more power to her. But, from my point of view, all I could see that her having my personal information was as a time bomb.

Based on my personal experience, and other clients right here on TOB who have been outed at there job and to there wife... DONT EVER TELL ANY HOOKER WHERE YOU WORK.

Move to the next hooker in line! There are many hookers right here who don't even screen and will take a risk and see anyone. You can use her as a reference.

I would be suspicious, you got your ok's updated, and you got p411, You had p411 for long time and she still wants to know your job...WTF is her intentions with your job? Now that is my thinking. WOW just WOW. I say NEXT....

[Guest]

Exactly. Never let a hooker criticize you for not being willing to pass this kind of screening. If she does, just say "I'll show you mine if you show me yours." Ultimately, it's your money. Take it elsewhere.

Yeah, if she wants your real information, tell her you want know hers first. Start screening her ass. Lets see how she likes it. Booking a hooker... This is not an application for getting married. We are not entitled to know jack shit about your personal life.

[irun9grls]

a lot of girls have joined for free many other boards that are closed membership boards(like p411,) that if you wanted to spend all that membership money to join them (over 6k at last count) and send them pms from all of them at the same time that would be convincing to any provider that if your that much of a hobbyist to troll the boards and spend that much money on all those sites as a member.

as a matter of fact I know a lot of providers that ask if your a member of the other boards and ask to prove it if you say yes.!

[Guest Shauna_Styles]

P411 is a screening tool. One of many a lady should use when deciding to see a gentleman. Just because a guy has been 'verified' on P411 doesn't mean he's safe to see or that he's not LE.

Just ask the 22 providers who were busted via a sting set up through P411.

A guy may be 'verified' through a 3rd party sight but might have reports on an escort only site for shorting the donation, no call/no show, being a stalker etc. Maybe this provider has had similar issues with guys trying to pull a fast one.

You don't know how many times I have received emails or texts from guys claiming to be P411 members but they aren't or their membership expired.

Screening services a multitude of services...to weed out time wasters, LE and dangerous clients. It also gives the provider an idea of what the client will be like. If he is not willing to submit to screening or tries to work his way around it, then he is showing me that he is not respectful of my boundaries. I do not want to a man who can't respect my boundaries.

I may be an escort but I still have the right to be safe.

Also, you want your provider to feel safe and comfortable so as to have the best session possible.

If you have a problem with a providers screening process, then move on to another because there are plenty of men who will submit to screening even if it is strict. There are some providers who ask for employment information. Not to blackmail you, but as a way to verify that you are who you say you are and aren't going to rape/rob/murder us. If you are seeing a legit provider who has an outstanding reputation then there should be no problem. A lady who values her clients and her business is not going to risk her livelihood to blackmail a john. This is were research of reviews etc comes in when seeing a provider

Quite frankly, as a client I would be very leery of any girl who doesn't do some type of screening, that's just asking for something bad to happen.

Bottom line I'm sharing my body with you, the least you can do is submit to screening.

[BigBaldBlk]

...I saw an opportunity to try to set up a time to see her and sent her an email. Unwittingly I sent it from a email address that isn't the same as on my p411. I honestly never even thought about it. All of my email addies are very similar (probably not the greatest idea for security, fixing that now) so it is very easy to confuse them, plus no one else has ever had an issue if I emailed from a different account.

So I receive a rather terse reply saying that I need to send an email from the same as on p411, and that I'm coming across as suspicious. This is after trading texts and sending a PM on on p411 as well just giving aheads up that I sent an email (I guess I believe in redundancy in the communication front)... I guess I'm just curious if this is a common occurrence? In my years of hobby-ing I haven't been held to this much suspicion since I was a newbie.

Mchave, I had the same situation happen to me and made a lady feel uncomfortable with sending an email from a secondary account. I'll disagree with PFunk on having multiple accounts as a bad thing, as I went from AOL to Yahoo and Google with the same handle. I think it's good.

I fell on the sword and sent the info she requested from my P411 and accompanying email account to P411. She didn't feel comfortable for the time scheduled but did say let's try it again. The second time I scheduled from my P411 and email, she gave a BS reason (to me), so I just smiled, took it with a grain of salt, learned from this and vowed I wouldn't see her under any circumstance.

It's really up to us gents to make ladies feel comfortable and if we don't, she has a right to squawk. It's a two-way street, so if you don't feel comfortable providing above and beyond info she' maybe requesting, my suggestion is to move on, or wait until another lady you want to see visits your way. Either way, good luck!

[Mchave45]

I wan't to clear something up, if I wan't clear. I'm not criticizing her security or her precautions. I am all for them. No one should feel uncomfortable in these situations, kinda ruins the vibe, eh? I get where she was coming from, but I didn't like being treated like I was some creeper. There is all ready a lot of stigma attached to this hobby.

I guess I was just kind of put off by the tone and perceived treatment. And to be honest I think, with a few days in hindsight, I was probably more embarrassed that I messed up twice on such a stupid thing to mess up on.

I do agree that sometimes the flow of info can seem one sided, but that thought has to be tempered with the fact that these women have their faces out there and we don't.

[Gizzicka Dior]

P411 is a screening tool. One of many a lady should use when deciding to see a gentleman. Just because a guy has been 'verified' on P411 doesn't mean he's safe to see or that he's not LE.

Just ask the 22 providers who were busted via a sting set up through P411.

A guy may be 'verified' through a 3rd party sight but might have reports on an escort only site for shorting the donation, no call/no show, being a stalker etc. Maybe this provider has had similar issues with guys trying to pull a fast one.

You don't know how many times I have received emails or texts from guys claiming to be P411 members but they aren't or their membership expired.

Screening services a multitude of services...to weed out time wasters, LE and dangerous clients. It also gives the provider an idea of what the client will be like. If he is not willing to submit to screening or tries to work his way around it, then he is showing me that he is not respectful of my boundaries. I do not want to a man who can't respect my boundaries.

I may be an escort but I still have the right to be safe.

Also, you want your provider to feel safe and comfortable so as to have the best session possible.

If you have a problem with a providers screening process, then move on to another because there are plenty of men who will submit to screening even if it is strict. There are some providers who ask for employment information. Not to blackmail you, but as a way to verify that you are who you say you are and aren't going to rape/rob/murder us. If you are seeing a legit provider who has an outstanding reputation then there should be no problem. A lady who values her clients and her business is not going to risk her livelihood to blackmail a john. This is were research of reviews etc comes in when seeing a provider

Quite frankly, as a client I would be very leery of any girl who doesn't do some type of screening, that's just asking for something bad to happen.

Bottom line I'm sharing my body with you, the least you can do is submit to screening.

ditto

after one bad situation that JUST happened to me in az with a "p411" member i am VERY nervous about who can get through, so my screening has gotten a little tougher for MY SAFETY, yes LE is a big concern but in that situation it was THE LEAST of my worries.

There are tons of reasons why we have to take extra precautions... and I am happy and blessed I was smart enough and quick enough to swindle myself out of that situation safe and sound..... a lot of ladies are not always that lucky.....

[frankenthaler91]

All a guy needs to do is look at the NBL website for any State. See how many real names may be listed in the open. What happens when a "well reviewed" provider decides to "black list" you for having bad breath or maybe you became a little funky on the long drive to her? Then someone does an internet search of your name. BAM, there you are, on a escorts registry.

Use your big head a little. Don't give more than you are comfortable with. And if she doesn't like what you give, move along.

[irun9grls]

this may be a situation unique to Denver.theres a whole world of cities and boards in the world..to confine yourself to Colorado is a mistake.keep looking

[LadyInWaiting]

This is interesting to me, last week I sent a text to a provider to a provider that I was interested in seeing. Only to get back a text calling me an Officer and telling me she would not see me. As I tried to give her references she was polite but very suspicious of me because we were unable to set up an appointment over a year ago.

I guess there's no being able change some people's minds

There has to be a reason for this response. The mention of services or donation would be my guess. Your "no being able to change some people's minds" translates into I did not respect her refusal to see me and kept texting her even after she was polite to me. Sounds like she went with her instinct and there was a very good reason for this not just the fact you where unable to set an appointment a year ago. I'm sure there is more to the story they you have stated and have chosen to omit to avoid a unanimous she was right response.

To the OP how was the lady to know that your p411 account had not been compromised my advice as it has been said would be stick with the information that is contained in your p411 account. p411 is very clear to the fact it is a screening tool it doesn't mean you are entitled to an appointment. You really can not be upset with the provider in the least for your choice to use an email that was not listed on your p411 account.

[LadyInWaiting]

To the OP p411 is a screening tool only. The use of an email different from the one listed on your P411 account might not be no big deal in your eyes. In the provider's eyes it raised a flag because normally gentlemen contact from the email listed on their account also the number if listed on their account.

CrazyB

There has to be more to the times you contacted the provider other then what you have shared. A provider is not going to think that you are LEO just because you couldn't schedule a time. The mention of explicit services or donations is a huge reason for this. Is that what happened when you contacted this provider?

You say she was polite in calling you an officer and saying she would not see you so it escapes me as to why you would persist in as you admitted trying to change her mind?

Shouldn't a provider's refusal to see someone be respected just as gentlemen want the fact of what they are and are not willing to provide for screening be respected?

As for NBL sites while I do not agree with them being public for the reasons of ladies safety first and gentlemen's privacy second they are reviews. Gentlemen have no issues writing reviews to inform other gentlemen of a provider. BL sites and references are informing other providers of a gentleman.

This is suppose to be fun for all party's involved if it's not then maybe it's not for you. The comfort of one is not more important for one side then the other. Respect should be shown on both sides. Boundaries should be respect by both sides as well.

[irun9grls]

well mchave its not you because many newbees don't know this fact.

I see the same girls regularly.after about 2-3 years im told by these girls and others they aquire "regulars"guys who come back and see them once a week,month,year..they make up up to half to 3/4 of their biz!they don't have to advertise as much exct..then when you come along and make a mistake with emails or the first time you don't jump thru their hoops they could care less..they have more then enough biz to keep them busy with regulars..so don't feel bad...just do exzactly what they say and youll have no problems!!!