Would ya? Wouldn't ya?

[pfunk]

This is an anonymous poll. Just curious whether most posters care.

If you knew a girl was bare-backing clients, would it affect whether you might visit her?

[lilithia]

I have a SO and I bareback with him does that count. You have a SO does that count. These polls are so stupid.

lilithia

[The Oxymoron]

99.9% of our community is barebacking someone, and I highly doubt that someone is much "safer" that your average client or provider.

If you care about mitigating your risks in this department, ALL contacts should be treated as though they are engaging in high-risk sex on a regular basis. The reality is that most are, so conduct yourself accordingly.

[Guest]

99.9% of our community is barebacking someone, and I highly doubt that someone is much "safer" that your average client or provider.

But it is much safer than a girl that's offering bareback as a service (which is not your average provider). I'm pretty sure that's what the original poster is referring to. Girls offering bareback as a service.

If I were a client and I saw a girl offering the service I would run for the hills!

[fork]

I always play it safe, but I don't want to be tempted by these sirens. I want to live. So I tend to avoid these girls.

It is surprisingly common with the lower-cost BP girls. I guess they don't give a shit whether they live or die. I sometimes neglect to review a girl who offers it, with the hope that they move on.

[BigBaldBlk]

I have a SO and I bareback with him does that count. You have a SO does that count. These polls are so stupid.

lilithia

If one BB's with their SO, I don't think that is too bad as long as they are exclusive with each other in BB activities. However, if the SO is BB with others in-and-out of the community, I would want to know and I would stay away from said lady!

[The Oxymoron]

I don't condone unprotected sex in the community, and I wouldn't be engaging in BBBJ either, if I were still a provider. That's why I retired from providing, I wasn't willing to start taking that risk and BBBJ became the norm very quickly.

Having unprotected sex with a client is not any riskier than having unprotected sex with any other person who engages in high-risk sexual behavior.

Many of the providers' S.O.'s are neither faithful nor low-risk.... many of my S.O.'s were neither faithful nor low-risk. In fact, my husband (happily married for many years) could be stepping out on me, I really don't know for sure that he's not. I still BB with him though, but I am fully aware of the risk I am taking.

I don't like seeing people, especially providers, pulling the wool over their own eyes. Convincing themselves that BBBJ with clients is okay, BB with boyfriends (who are often former clients) is okay, but BB with clients is completely crazy.

It's all crazy, it's all a risk... and it's up to the individual to decide what is best for themselves.

All unprotected contact is risky to one degree or another, and the vast majority of people in this industry are engaging in high-risk behaviors, whether we want to accept that fact or not.

Pointing the finger at someone else and the activities they engage in can be fun and a little uplifting (I guess), but it's really no one's business what another person does behind closed doors. At least, that's how I see the world.

[lilithia]

OK so a provider can perform BBBJ and that is fine in fact if a provider does not offer BBBJ a good portion of clients will not see a provider nor will he be a repeat client. I agree with oxy we providers take too much risk for very little. So any provider who offers BBBJ don't give a shit whether we live or die because oral cancer his been on the rise for a long time.

But lets make this clear there are many women and men who have never been a hooker or john who are diseased.

So this is not about hooker vs a non-hooker john vs a non john. This is about anyone, everyone who engages in high risk sexual behavior.

Edited May 8, 2014 by lilithia
spellling

[fork]

OK so a provider can perform BBBJ and that is fine in fact if a provider does not offer BBBJ a good portion of clients will not see a provider nor will he be a repeat client. I agree with oxy we providers take too much risk for very little. So any provider who offers BBBJ don't give a shit whether we live or die because oral cancer his been on the rise for a long time.

I don't know the odds of contracting HPV, or the chance of getting oral cancer, or the rate of problems from the cancer, so perhaps I'm talking out my ass here. But such cancer has never risen to the crisis level that HIV has, so I'm confident in saying that this is less risky than unprotected vaginal or anal sex. Much less, I believe.

But lets make this clear there are many women and men who have never been a hooker or john who are diseased.

So this is not about hooker vs a non-hooker john vs a non john. This is about anyone, everyone who engages in high risk sexual behavior.

Absolutely correct.

[lilithia]

Ok since you admitted you have no idea about oral cancer let me say this the chance of getting HPV and HSV is much greater than getting HIV. The point being it does no good for a provider to use a condom with FS and not when she is doing BBBJ.. Our mouths are just as much at risk as is our VJ yet we don't think twice about that. So all though we have protected our VJ our mouths are full of disease.

makes no sense on either part.

Lilithia

[The Oxymoron]

This is about anyone, everyone who engages in high risk sexual behavior.

Exactly. We all engage in high risk behaviors and should protect ourselves in the manner that works best for us.

So all though we have protected our VJ our mouths are full of disease.

Well, I wouldn't quite say that!

However, the tissue in a person's mouth is very similar to the tissue in someone's vagina. In my mind, it's not a risk that I am not comfortable with. Although, as I said I am comfortable taking the risk of BB with my husband, who isn't necessarily the "faithful" type.

If other people are comfortable taking the risk of BBBJ, or even kissing (I don't want ANY communicable disease, thanks), that's fine with me. I do my very best not to look down on them, or to think that I'm in any way better than anyone else, because they are willing to take more risk in this hobby than I am.

It's hard though, it took me a lot of years to get over it. And in getting over it, I also got over being the least bit concerned about ANY activity, that ANY adult chooses to do in the privacy of their bedrooms. Including BBFS.

Whether it's hobby related or not, it's none of my business and not for me to judge.

As a side note: please know that if a provider came to me asking how to deal with protecting herself while in the hobby, I would tell her to treat every casual contact (in and out side of the hobby) as though she knew that they had a communicable disease. The reality is, some people do.... and you will not be able to figure out who they are.

[MAG]

and you will not be able to figure out who they are.

Bingo. Wrap that rascal, period.

[fork]

Ok since you admitted you have no idea about oral cancer let me say this the chance of getting HPV and HSV is much greater than getting HIV.

That's not the whole story. What matters it the risk of getting HPV combined with the risk of getting cancer from that virus combined with the risk of the cancer causing actual symptoms or harm (before you die of other causes or get treatment).

I do not see entire countries in oral cancer crisis, like I do with HIV in Africa. So I conclude that this risk is much less likely to cause a problem.

The point being it does no good for a provider to use a condom with FS and not when she is doing BBBJ.. Our mouths are just as much at risk as is our VJ yet we don't think twice about that. So all though we have protected our VJ our mouths are full of disease.

makes no sense on either part.

Everyone makes their own decisions, of course.

[fork]

It's hard though, it took me a lot of years to get over it. And in getting over it, I also got over being the least bit concerned about ANY activity, that ANY adult chooses to do in the privacy of their bedrooms. Including BBFS.

Why then is BBFS not on the list of "activities enjoyed" that providers can list on P411?

Not that I'm pushing for you to include it. I'm just saying, this isn't consistent with you being unconcerned.

[The Oxymoron]

Why then is BBFS not on the list of "activities enjoyed" that providers can list on P411?

Not that I'm pushing for you to include it. I'm just saying, this isn't consistent with you being unconcerned.

The reason is because I only have limited time and energy to devote to talking people down off the ledge. It's a term that causes nothing but drama, and I already deal with more than my share of stupidity every day.

Life is short, and if anything or anyone gives me a headache, they/it are not welcome in my world. That term is simply one of those things that would have people contacting me, freaking out, every few minutes.

Even if my personal opinion is that people should learn to mind their own business and start realizing that this is all one huge risk around here, I'm not willing to have this debate every day. I'm already exhausted!

Hopefully that makes sense, in some kind of round about way.

[MAG]

The reason is because I only have limited time and energy to devote to talking people down off the ledge. It's a term that causes nothing but drama, and I already deal with more than my share of stupidity every day.

Life is short, and if anything or anyone gives me a headache, they/it are not welcome in my world. That term is simply one of those things that would have people contacting me, freaking out, every few minutes.

I participate on another site, where the main forum is a hybrid of discussion & reviews. Johns talk about BBFS all the time. In fact, when word gets out that it's being offered by someone, these guys turn into panting dogs trying to find out more info so they can line up at her door. It's amazing.

The mod of that forum is kept very busy trying to mediate the drama that ensues. It'd be much easier to simply create a new "forbidden topic" rule and be done with it.

[fork]

That makes sense, thanks.

[boink36]

I participate on another site, where the main forum is a hybrid of discussion & reviews. Johns talk about BBFS all the time. In fact, when word gets out that it's being offered by someone, these guys turn into panting dogs trying to find out more info so they can line up at her door. It's amazing.

The mod of that forum is kept very busy trying to mediate the drama that ensues. It'd be much easier to simply create a new "forbidden topic" rule and be done with it.

That's crazy, I wouldn't do BB with my wife when I was married I'm sure not going to do it in the hobby.

[gr8owl]

If you knew a girl was bare-backing clients, would it affect whether you might visit her?

Depends. If I knew she did BBBJ at least on a YMMV basis - much more likely to see. If she proudly advertised BBFS, so obviously makes habit of - nah, not be seeing me!

I am well aware there are risks to both - but at different levels. I can be 100% safe by giving up sex altogether. I can be 100% sexually happy by fucking any willing and reasonably attractive lady BB everything, but almost 100% certain to get something nasty. It is plain and simple an individual risk analysis of where I am comfortable in between the two extremes. Some risk for some reward is necessary to really live, which I choose to do and I just plain like BBBJ and DATY too damn much.

And lastly, call me crazy but BBFS can be one of those reserved activities as enhancers for special people/relationships. But that may be just me.

[2Big]

Wait, What? Folks in this community are barebacking it?????

[Jez UaBriain]

I wilkl say bthat we whoi do this are much more cautious about this. And married men are about the safest creatures because they do not want to take anything home to the so. Some of you guys like to talk to0 other providers about providers. And this is mentioned frequently. My thought is this- I think a few of you will say this to see if we will. So , I have lately started to ask the same thing of you. Sort of a trick question, and my own research on the subject. Maybe thats wrong of me to trck you into an answer, but it is what it is. And you will wear a condom with me. Irregardless of your answer.

The beauty of it is- I've never had a std, and I am not about to end that track record now

[Shackleford]

If you knew a girl was bare-backing clients, would it affect whether you might visit her?

I find it amazing how many people in this thread (so far) have committed the same fallacy in their argument. Just because she may offer the service does not mean you have to partake. Granted, the poll does take that into account with the "No, I play safe, so it doesn't matter" option.

What if she offered it, but with an upcharge of $10 billion? Then technically she "offers" it, but it would be extremely unlikely that anyone would have actually taken the offer. Does that make her "safer"/"less risky"?