Newbie 101

[Buddy Glass]

Hi Newbie. Welcome to the hobby. Let's get you started.

There are a few things to understand first, so let's get those out of the way. You are not entitled to see anyone, and you are not required to see anyone. This is a luxury experience on both sides, and everyone involved is allowed to be picky. Also understand that, when conducted certain ways, this experience may violate local laws. Arrest isn't the goal of this experience, so there are a multitude of methods to help mitigate that. We don't speak of money, and we don't speak of specific activities when we set up appointments. There are other inherent risks. On the client side, these can range from a lackluster meeting to a full rip off. On the provider side, they will be concerned about safety and well being. It's important to respect that. 

Starting out

So how do you, Mr. Newbie, get started? You have options! One highly recommended option is to join p411. This helps to establish you as ok (but it isn't the end all be all of verification). After joining, fill out your profile, including your preferences. Many providers will look at that to see if you're a match. As an alternative to p411, you can try visiting providers who are 'newbie friendly', several of which advertise here. Understand the providers will screen you, and each has their own method that works for them. On this site you'll see considerable debate over those, but remember, regardless of your opinion, her method of screening belongs to her and no amount of begging, screaming, or berating is going to convince her to change it. So don't waste anyone's time with doing that. Decide whether to provide what she asks for, or politely decline and move on.

How to choose a provider

Read through her ads, look at her pictures, and very importantly, read her reviews. This will tell you several things- rates, activities she's likely comfortable with, and whether she's legit. Understand that with every activity is an unwritten rule- YMMV. Just because she participated in an activity with one guy doesn't mean she's comfortable doing that with you. However, being polite will go a long way to making her comfortable to explore activities with you. When reading a review, open Urban Dictionary to look up terms and acronyms you don't understand. Read through all of her reviews. The more reviews she has, the less likely you are to encounter something bad, like a rip off or a badge. It's not fool proof, and there will always be risk. If you need 100% certainty before booking, you're going to have a very long wait. Everything we do here though helps to mitigate risk. 

The Appointment

Show up on time. Being there 5-10 minutes early and sending a text is a great way to avoid complications. Be clean, or if that's not possible due to work, let the provider know ahead of time you'll need a shower on arrival. Often times, they'll join you in there! Be sure to account for shower time when you book. If your shower takes 20 minutes, you'll only have 10 left on that half hour appointment. Leave the donation somewhere easy for her to see, of your own volition. Don't make her ask. That's terrible form. And make sure it's the correct amount ahead of time. I've only heard once about a guy asking for change. That's just awkward for everyone. Tipping is up to you. The ladies enjoy it, and it does leave a favorable impression of you, but it isn't mandatory. Finish on time. Many providers will work until you're finished, but no one enjoys mandatory overtime. Know yourself, too. If you're one and done, don't try to force two rounds. If you can easily achieve two rounds, ask her if that's an option when the first round is complete. That sort of thing is a perk, not a requirement, and should still be finished within the original time booked. 

References

You don't have any. Not yet. After visiting a provider, you can ask her if she is reference friendly. A word of mouth reference is tricky at best, and somewhat unreliable. P411 has an OK system in which a provider can mark your profile to basically say you had a session with her and didn't rip her off. ToB has a similar OK system as well. These OKs are persistent, and last much longer than a provider's memory of you, which makes them more valuable than word of mouth references. Again, it's not fool proof, and doesn't totally eliminate risk to either side, but it's a powerful mitigating force. Usually providers will want at least 2 references if they're not newbie friendly. 

Personal Info

Some providers will ask you to provide your personal info. Although this causes significant debate in the forums, ultimately it's your choice whether to do so. If you choose not to, be polite about it. Understand that declining means you probably won't see her. If you ever happen to come into possession of a provider's personal info, delete it, forget it, and don't be a dick with it. Outing ANYONE is a hardcore dick move. 

Privacy

A few things you can consider to maintain your privacy are getting an entirely separate email address as well as an entirely separate phone. Burner phones, the cheap prepaid ones you can pick up at Walmart, won't link back easily to you (though they won't really hide you from LE). There are also aps available to download to do the same thing. These are primarily to shield your name from caller id and internet searches.  Some providers won't see you if you use an ap or burner phone. It's your decision whether to move on or use your 'real' phone. Whatever the choice, be polite about it. If you choose to use your regular phone, you should know that the Facebook ap (among others) will harvest the phone numbers in your list. This can lead to provider's profiles popping up on your recommend friends list. 

General Advice

Read these forums. There's a ton of information here on making the experience better for everyone. Be patient. Sometimes providers run late. Someday you'll be running late. And, sometimes you won't be able to see the provider you really want at the time you really want. It's OK to wait. Book another time, or another provider. There is plenty to go around for everyone. And last, feel free to post your questions. If you're not an asshole with your question, people are generally happy to help. 

[Cecilia]

Excellent! Thank you for this, I'm sure I will refer newbies to this in the future.

One suggestion....

*Read her ad/profile for her preferred method of contact. ;-)

Edited July 9, 2016 by Cecilia

[jj254-1]

Good guide. Should keep this link for new folks. 

[Cecilia]

I am being inundated with newbies this week, and have shared this link a dozen times so far. Ugh.

Thanks for the playbook!

[Guest]

1 hour ago, Cecilia said:

I am being inundated with newbies this week, and have shared this link a dozen times so far. Ugh.

Thanks for the playbook!

Those Noobs are getting a great intro to the hobby if you're their guide!

I hope they're showing you mucho appreciation for being their intro.

[Cecilia]

7 minutes ago, MrBigShot said:

Those Noobs are getting a great intro to the hobby if you're their guide!

I hope they're showing you mucho appreciation for being their intro.

Aww shucks, I just love the way you stroke my ego. Now come over and let me return the favor!

[wglide2003]

Very good advise, well written. I wish it  was available when I started.

[tony964321]

Thank you so much. I appreciate the help.

[Buddy Glass]

I'm glad it's been useful. Hope it makes the plunge easier for the new people out there. 

[DRSinker]

This is indeed helpful, thank you for sharing  -

I have a nooberiffic question and it would seem this is the appropriate place for it. Thus far I have only made appointments with providers who clearly advertise the donation expectation. It's nice to have rates well-defined and of course aids in the selection process and overall preparedness. A sensitive topic no doubt, I've been reluctant to contact any provider so far who does not define the donation request, and prefer to check out the P411 or website (for a variety of obvious reasons), but this also leads to many missed opportunities.

So.. in the instance this information is not provided in the TOB Ad / BP post, etc.. what's the appropriate approach? I would think the simple answer would be to just inquire by phone, but couldn't that lead to a faux pas?  Thanks in advance.

 

[Bit Banger]

IMHO, if she is unwilling to post rates (for time) AND unwilling to discuss them - PASS!

[pfunk]

1 hour ago, Bit Banger said:

IMHO, if she is unwilling to post rates (for time) AND unwilling to discuss them - PASS!

I totally agree!  ^^^^ (what are we supposed to do, guess?)

For DrSinker,  I suggest calling and asking - "what is your usual donation for 30 minutes, or 1 hour?"      If that upsets her, move on. 

Edited July 22, 2016 by pfunk

[DRSinker]

Makes sense, thank you gents. I figured it was probably as obvious as that, but nonetheless can't help but think perhaps I was missing something key here. Appreciate the input!

[Kaduk]

20 minutes ago, DRSinker said:

Makes sense, thank you gents. I figured it was probably as obvious as that, but nonetheless can't help but think perhaps I was missing something key here. Appreciate the input!

If its for an unknown provider, you have done your research & feel comfortable with going through with the session, about all you can ask is;

1. How much for the hour
2. Are your pictures accurate
3. Will you stay for the entire hour 

There was a post from awhile back where the member stated when an Advertised rate was not shown & not wanted to be given out. That member would show up with 250 in his pocket the provider never questioned the amount with the session going nicely.....

[Buddy Glass]

8 hours ago, DRSinker said:

Makes sense, thank you gents. I figured it was probably as obvious as that, but nonetheless can't help but think perhaps I was missing something key here. Appreciate the input!

It's not that you can never, ever ask, but it's pretty situational, and not something I'd recommend to a newbie. When you've become comfortable enough with doing your research to make sure she's legit, and she doesn't have any rates posted, well, it's the only way you'll find out. But brand new people can walk into a whole world of problems doing that without putting in the research ahead of time.