Bad Dinner Dates :(

[Guest]

I have a client I have been seeing for almost 2 years. The perfect English gentleman in every way, up until now.

We schedule a dinner date for our most recent meeting. It was a restaurant close to his hotel, and we were to meet there. A nice place that I have been to before. It is an hour drive for me to get there. I arrive 15 minutes early. He informs me he will be late. He was an hour late.

I order a coffee and an appetizer. I know he will show up, I am not worried. The waitress is checking on me and providing great service while I wait.

When he texts, I ask if he would like me to order him a drink. They have a nice beer and wine selection. He says no.

He finally arrives and starts to look through the menu. He is not liking a single thing on the menu, and decides he wants Indian food. Okay, I point out we are not in area of town with too many options, but there is a nice family owned place close by. He says lets go there, in a huff. He says, I will pay the bill.

At this point I begin to worry he will not tip the waitress accordingly for occupying her table for an hour. I tell him I will handle it and meet him at the other restaurant. I apologize to the waitress and tip her for her time.

We arrive at the new place. He begins complaining they do not have a classic Indian dish, how dare they. He then asks the waitress for it. She politely says, it is not on the menu. He is becoming more agitated and rude. Then he ask for a beer. They don't have liquor there, he is upset. I point out the other place did. He settles on something. Then mocks to me how the waitress must be deaf, she didn't understand him.

No I said, her English is bad, and it is not in her control what is on the menu. We are on the outskirts of town. You will not find things on the menu here, you can find in the city. ( I am trying to keep my cool) She brings the bill and there are a couple of plates on the table. He says, that is unacceptable to bring the bill before clearing the plates. I am now hitting a level of WTF dude. He completely has this girl nervous and scared.

We leave, and he says, I am sorry I am a picky eater.

My response was, apparently! I am surprised you like to eat my pussy! I then inform him that I was a food server for 8 years, and it is a hard job. She didn't deserve that. He says, next time we will just order in pizza. Are you ever going to see me again?

I said, yes I will see you again, but I will never go to a restaurant with you again!

I have seen a few posts on TOB, concerning clients taking escorts into public. How they are not sure how we will act in public. I will tell you how we will act...polite and courteous. I held this man in a ranking of one of my better clients until today. I am so disappointed. I am embarrassed by his behavior.

Do any other providers have stories like this?

 

[Guest]

Did he give a reason for his obvious bad mood?  It sounds like, at some point, he was aware enough of your feelings to recognize that he'd screwed up.  

A cautionary tale for all gentlemen: in truth we are always on trial.  Take care unless you are weighed in the balances and found wanting.

"You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him."

Goethe

[Bit Banger]

Did he give a reason for his obvious bad mood?  It sounds like, at some point, he was aware enough of your feelings to recognize that he'd screwed up.  

A cautionary tale for all gentlemen: in truth we are always on trial.  ...

Or for why he was late? The two may very well be linked. His mind may have been dealing with whatever detained him. 

Hopefully you improved his day. :)

[abigailfox]

Unfortunately, yes. I share your pain. I've had a similar experience. I too worked as a server for a bit right out of high school and later as a chef. I discussed the rudeness factor once with a few people, and we came to the conclusion that it is just in the nature of some people to complain and generally act negative all the time...they're unhappy and look for others to direct their misery onto.

I am impressed you kept your cool, my tolerance is low for such outright rude and disrespectful behavior by a grown man. Just because you are in a bad mood does not mean you have to act an ass towards others. There is a difference between a picky eater and being rude. Using it as an excuse for his behavior is just silly. He should own up to it, apologize to the waitress and pull up his big boy panties. Hopefully he has learned from this situation and will examine and adjust his behavior accordingly. Good luck to you I wish you no more repeats of this situation, it is quite an agonizing position to be in.

[Guest]

I discussed the rudeness factor once with a few people, and we came to the conclusion that it is just in the nature of some people to complain and generally act negative all the time...they're unhappy and look for others to direct their misery onto.

Some people are just miserable. It's great if you can avoid them. But that's really hard to do when your job is trying to bring a little joy to people, some of whom are miserable. Whether that means giving them a great meal, or a memorable hour of fun. It'd be a lot easier if everyone remembered that none of this really matters, life is just a ride, and the ride is so much better if you just enjoy it along with everyone else.

Paraphrasing Bill Hicks there. If you want some insight, google "Bill Hicks It's just a ride".

[Guest]

I get where you are going with this Bit Banger. In the 2 years I have known him, he is always tired and frustrated. He has a demanding job. I can empathize, trust me. Remember... Escorts are the lion tamers of men. We are here to help the tired, hungry, and frustrated.

The first part of all of our visits are letting him defuse from the work day. I also had no problem with him being late, after 2 years that is bound to happen. I offered to order for him and have the food waiting. I also offered to take it to go and meet him at the hotel. He was 100% assured I was not upset. I even reassured him in between restaurants. About a year ago, we went for coffee. I noticed then he was a bit short with the staff. I wrote it off then as him being tired.

I am going with Laplace on this one. This was more of an attitude of "You are the help, be gone with you."

"You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him."

Goethe

I am still so sad he treated that waitress that way, she was nothing but sweet.

[BadBoy]

My dad was a much more successful person than I, and at one point in time he owned several businesses and had over 800 employees, and he liked to dine out.  He never said anything to me about this issue, but he taught by example: he always treated waitresses (as well as cabbies, doormen, maids, and any other service people), like they were the center of his world.  He didn't just treat them as equals, he treated them as important people he had the brief privilege of meeting -and he wasn't acting, he really felt that way.  Always "please" "thank you" and more than once: "you seem to be having a bad day, can we help?"  He also way overtipped.  Interestingly, he treated his employees the same way.  When he died everyone at the funeral (hundreds) said "he was the classiest guy I ever met."  I think part of it came from being born in a tar-paper shack with no indoor plumbing, part of it came from working in a coal mine from age 12 to 19 (until the Army draft changed his life). I try to follow in his footsteps, but he is just plain too classy to keep up with.  I do, however, try to treat everyone with respect, and think people who abuse waitresses are low-life slobs.  Thanks, dad.

[Kaduk]

I have a client I have been seeing for almost 2 years. The perfect English gentleman in every way, up until now.

We schedule a dinner date for our most recent meeting. It was a restaurant close to his hotel, and we were to meet there. A nice place that I have been to before. It is an hour drive for me to get there. I arrive 15 minutes early. He informs me he will be late. He was an hour late.

I order a coffee and an appetizer. I know he will show up, I am not worried. The waitress is checking on me and providing great service while I wait.

When he texts, I ask if he would like me to order him a drink. They have a nice beer and wine selection. He says no.

He finally arrives and starts to look through the menu. He is not liking a single thing on the menu, and decides he wants Indian food. Okay, I point out we are not in area of town with too many options, but there is a nice family owned place close by. He says lets go there, in a huff. He says, I will pay the bill.

At this point I begin to worry he will not tip the waitress accordingly for occupying her table for an hour. I tell him I will handle it and meet him at the other restaurant. I apologize to the waitress and tip her for her time.

We arrive at the new place. He begins complaining they do not have a classic Indian dish, how dare they. He then asks the waitress for it. She politely says, it is not on the menu. He is becoming more agitated and rude. Then he ask for a beer. They don't have liquor there, he is upset. I point out the other place did. He settles on something. Then mocks to me how the waitress must be deaf, she didn't understand him.

We leave, and he says, I am sorry I am a picky eater.

My response was, apparently! I am surprised you like to eat my pussy! I then inform him that I was a food server for 8 years, and it is a hard job. She didn't deserve that. He says, next time we will just order in pizza. Are you ever going to see me again?

I said, yes I will see you again, but I will never go to a restaurant with you again!

I have seen a few posts on TOB, concerning clients taking escorts into public. How they are not sure how we will act in public. I will tell you how we will act...polite and courteous. I held this man in a ranking of one of my better clients until today. I am so disappointed. I am embarrassed by his behavior.

Do any other providers have stories like this?

 

The Big bang theory Scene: The Cheesecake Factory

Penny: Hey. So you guys ready to order?

Sheldon: Since we come in every Tuesday night at six o’clock and order the same exact thing, and it’s now six oh eight, I believe your question not only answers itself but also stands alongside such other nonsensical queries as who let the dogs out? and, uh, How are they hanging?

Penny: Okay. So, the usual, with extra spit on Sheldon’s hamburger.

Amy: Penny, a moment? Do you have plans this weekend?

Penny: Oh, gee, Amy, I’m sorry, I’m actually pretty busy this weekend.

Sheldon: Probably serving food that was ordered today.

(edited out superfluous content)

Penny: Boy, this is great. I haven’t had a vacation in ages.

Sheldon: In order to take a vacation, one first has to work.

Penny: You know, for a smart guy, you really seem to have a hard time grasping the concept, don’t piss off the people who handle the things you eat.

Amy: That does seem to be a valid principle.

Sheldon: I trust Penny will adhere to the Official California Restaurant Workers’ Solemn Oath of Ethics and Cleanliness.”

Amy: I don’t believe there’s any such thing.

Edited September 24, 2015 by Kaduk

[Guest]

 

We leave, and he says, I am sorry I am a picky eater.

 

I had a paid dining companion once that sent back three drinks, two appetizers, the soup and her entree. Absolutely nothing could be done to satisfy this girl. And this was at a really wonderful restaurant with some of the best food I had ever tasted. She behaved like a spoiled child, rude and entitled, and embarrassed me greatly. At the end of the meal, I paid her for her time, paid for the session we did not complete, put her in a cab and sent her away. I had seen this woman several times before but it turned out that compatibility in the bedroom did not equate to compatibility in the dining room. 

[gr8owl]

  I do, however, try to treat everyone with respect,   

As should we all.  First because it is the right thing to do, and making someone else feel good just makes me feel better too.  But if that is not good enough - "what goes around comes around"  Specifically, never piss off the person who:

folds your parachute

prepares, handles and serves your food out of sight

is your dentist - power tools inside your mouth, duh

is a doc checking your prostate - hey, maybe it takes four fingers instead of one

has your sensitive parts inside her mouth

is giving you a shave with a straight razor

knows where the land mines are

is your nurse and can make those needles pretty painless ..... or NOT

I am sure there are others.

[mtnman2000]

Some people think they are more impressive by being a jackass.  Or by being vague.

[lowboy]

My dad was a much more successful person than I, and at one point in time he owned several businesses and had over 800 employees, and he liked to dine out.  He never said anything to me about this issue, but he taught by example: he always treated waitresses (as well as cabbies, doormen, maids, and any other service people), like they were the center of his world.  He didn't just treat them as equals, he treated them as important people he had the brief privilege of meeting -and he wasn't acting, he really felt that way.  Always "please" "thank you" and more than once: "you seem to be having a bad day, can we help?"  He also way overtipped.  Interestingly, he treated his employees the same way.  When he died everyone at the funeral (hundreds) said "he was the classiest guy I ever met."  I think part of it came from being born in a tar-paper shack with no indoor plumbing, part of it came from working in a coal mine from age 12 to 19 (until the Army draft changed his life). I try to follow in his footsteps, but he is just plain too classy to keep up with.  I do, however, try to treat everyone with respect, and think people who abuse waitresses are low-life slobs.  Thanks, dad.

This. From my (thankfully short) time in a call center, I learned that treating people nicely wasn't hard and it usually made their and your day better. I also learned that there are some people that you just can't please no matter how hard you try. So I try to be the good diner, joking with the waiter or waitress, saying please and thank you. Most of the time it works and I can tell they appreciate it. The few times it doesn't.......well I won't let one bad instance keep me from coming back. But since I tip for service they may not like what I leave on the table.