Posted December 16, 2018 I am new to TOB, but not totally new to the Hobby. That said my past encounters have been in EU(Switzerland/Germany) so references were not required. I am curious what to expect for screening if no references are provided and how to best build confidence with ladies that I am genuine and reliable. It seems providing employment reference is common - I don't love this but would be willing to do so to build provide references. Any other things I can/should do? Should I register at p411? I have seen a few ladies that meetup for coffee first which would be fine but I tend to have sporadic availability and ideally would like to try to line something up for later in the week (Wednesday or Thursday). 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted December 18, 2018 On 12/15/2018 at 11:59 PM, glassonion said: I am new to TOB, but not totally new to the Hobby. That said my past encounters have been in EU(Switzerland/Germany) so references were not required. I am curious what to expect for screening if no references are provided and how to best build confidence with ladies that I am genuine and reliable. It seems providing employment reference is common - I don't love this but would be willing to do so to build provide references. Any other things I can/should do? Should I register at p411? I have seen a few ladies that meetup for coffee first which would be fine but I tend to have sporadic availability and ideally would like to try to line something up for later in the week (Wednesday or Thursday). Look for newbie friendly ladies, there are several on the board. Do your research and find some nice ladies. Go through whatever screening they ask and you are comfortable with. When you meet a lady offer a nice review and ask her if she'd be a reference. Get a few references and then your good to go, Bob's your uncle. This is how I started out, brand new met a few newbie friendlies got some references and now I can see most anyone, so long as they take tob references, Which is fine since to don't participate when traveling. Now the ladies who gave me a shot have become some of my favs. Good luck. But also be patient, plan and get screened in advance and then have fun 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted December 18, 2018 Many of us are newbie friendly. Read ads but more importantly- read a lady's website. You really can't ask about what to expect for screening...as business models and standards vary widely as hair color and body types in this industry. What use to be more segmented pre-internet (street workers/call girl by the hour workers and escort/courtesan types) are all more lumped together and can be super confusing for a newbie.... Sometimes finding an experience low drama newbie friendly lady is the best. Asking questions involving real name or work info is not to be prying or for nefarious purposes and every lady has their reason. Some just screen that way 'cause they see others screening that way and may not know the particular dynamics of why...and you will find those who take higher risks and will see you with hardly any info (but there's a drawback to that also..) A savvy companion will be able to lead you through comfortably...just be honest and sweet and forthcoming and explain your situation....we deal with an onslaught of creepy types (you have no idea! ) so that will put you ahead of the pack. Me, personally, I ask questions that make sure that the person is who they say they are and not one to cause me harm or entrapment...but also to ensure that they are not a family member, co-worker, husband of a friend or co-worker or someone I'd have to deal with awkwardly in my real life or business. So i screen for not only safety...but for discretion of both parties. There's too much hub bub and paranoia on both sides about screening and what a lady would do with your info...and it gets a bit ridiculous on " what to do" and "what not to do"... IMO. Most of the drama issues that we hear about truly comes down to choosing wrongly or taking unnecessary risks (ie: the "hot girl with zero info" and "take one for the team" crowd or even worst...someone started dating a provider/client and it got complicated then all shit hit the fan type things) Us ladies take care of the good guys...simply be one of them.. Have fun! 6 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted December 18, 2018 To simplify: It's often as easy to find a lady that interests you (before spending hours trying to find a "newbie friendly" in ads or website) and do this: 1. Introduce Yourself...and a bit about you. (and no..this "John. clean. 5'8" is not an intro) and state "I am new (or relatively new) at this so bear with me if I clunk through your protocol, but could you guide me in what you need from me to feel comfortable meeting me? I am seeking (time and date) to meet you" THAT SIMPLE....allow the lady to guide you... 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted December 18, 2018 2 hours ago, MelindaMadison said: THAT SIMPLE....allow the lady to guide you... Always good advice! 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted December 20, 2018 Thanks for the advice everyone. I am impressed with the ease of the process and efficacy. I have reached out to a few and all exchanges have been reasonable and comfortable. I was surprised this wasn't an existing topic, but I see now it's a short lived problem. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
