Carleeblissful

I find it rather comical when guys send below-the-waist photos and think it a proper introduction. The average non-provider woman on the internet has seen her fair share of those unsolicited photos. Just imagine how many we’ve seen 😂 a proper “Hi, my name is ______ and I would like to meet with you. Here’s a little about me that doesn’t include info about my third leg…” is truly superior.

I personally ask for ONE of the following: - 2 references of previous providers you’ve seen, however you choose to provide them (TER, P411, TOB, etc.). - A LinkedIn account with over 100 connections and a selfie that matches. For this one, ladies - I highly recommend learning how to check the metadata of a photo, which can be done right on your phone. Metadata will tell you the date, time, and location where the photo was taken. You can PM me if you want a little tech lesson! - A photo of ID (optional to send with the physical address obstructed) and a matching selfie. (Again, metadata is your friend.) - A deposit.

Well, you can at my place, if the inspiration strikes. 😂

You sound like a dream! I wouldn’t necessarily want to ride in someone else’s vehicle for a first meeting (though after getting to know you, it is a different story) just because I need to have control over my transportation for safety reasons, but the rest of this all sounds like exactly what we providers hope for when we are asked for an outcall meeting.

For my item on the list about instructions to the incall location, I meant to say “if you feel unsafe,” not “if you feel safe.” Obviously there is no reason to text the provider to cancel if you feel safe 😅😂 oops, it’s past my bedtime.

It’s very interesting to read these replies from both a providers’ perspective and the hobbyists’. It is completely understandable that we would all have our share of concerns and lists of non-negotiables. I am an experienced provider and I do find parts of this particular response rather…odd. Though, I do agree - spending money on providers of a certain caliber is certainly the way to go. 1. Websites: I do personally think they are necessary, as it demonstrates that a provider understands that she is a brand and a business. Any service provider in any regular industry should have one. From a provider’s perspective, it’s a great way to give all of the necessary information without awkward text or email exchanges where people are uncomfortable asking about this that and the other. It is also a great way to showcase what you offer as a provider. 2. Reviews: I haven’t used TER since I lived in Portland back in 2016 or so, so I can’t really speak to this (perhaps I should make more of an effort on that one). But I have found that it is notoriously difficult for clients to review here on TOB. Every client I’ve had recently since returning from my 3 year hiatus has had their reviews denied due to “lack of details” multiple times. I don’t want to trouble anyone with that, so I’ve stopped mentioning that I’d appreciate reviews altogether. There was a time when I exclusively told clients NOT to review because, back in the day, reviews were a surefire way for LE to get firsthand accounts of exactly what services you provide. 3. Teaser videos: As a provider for nearly a decade, I’ve never even heard of this being a thing. No provider whose website I’ve ever visited has this feature…maybe you’ll find something like that on an OnlyFans, if they have one. This seems redundant and…weird. Some providers would even call this a “freebie” of sorts…I don’t know. Don’t expect this. 4. High-end hotels are great, but I personally have worked hard to have a private, homey, and comfortable incall for clients who choose to come and see me. I will admit, when I do go to hotels to provide incalls while touring, yes - they are high-end. But I love my comfy home, and my clients do too. I’d say a lot of this kind of thinking from a hobbyist’s perspective is valid, but mostly redundant for those of us who provide bespoke services at a lower volume. I think it all comes down to what kind of provider you want to see. Here are some tips from an experienced provider’s perspective that answer your original question: - The provider should have a website. Yes, I do agree with this. Especially if you are seeking a provider who takes herself and her clientele seriously, and cares about her business. - No interaction should include deliberate, obvious mentions of exactly what you will be doing when you meet, especially when followed by questions about what exactly YOU want to do with her/to her/etc. A little bit of moody, flirty talk is always fun, but direct and deliberate questions about explicit activities from either provider or hobbyist’s side points to LE. Red flag. - An established provider likely will not give you exact directions to her incall until you are on the way to your meeting. Even then, you may be directed to park in a certain area and await further instruction. This is normal, and gives you plenty of time to look around should you want to check for potential LE or undercover in the area. If you feel safe, simply text the provider and cancel the appointment. Your concern for your safety is just as valid as ours. - In terms of provider incalls, if you truly are seeing a provider of a certain caliber it is likely that the incall location will be a safe neighborhood in a more private and secluded location. There are exceptions to this, but the majority of those of us who have been in this hobby for long enough and prefer seeing clients in an incall environment take our safety (and yours) very seriously, and thus select locations accordingly. - Most seasoned providers provide both incalls and outcalls. When you come to my home, I make the rules, and I have certain preferences to keep us both safe and comfortable. When I come to your home, I expect nothing less than for you to have the same. Boundaries on either side are non-negotiable, and any provider who presses those boundaries for you in any way before your meeting warrants a cancellation. - Always trust your gut feelings and your intuition. If something feels off, it probably is. Happy hobbying!

Any ladies on outcall are more than welcome to text me as well!

The schedule of the average provider is unpredictable and sporadic. Many of us have other obligations (school, work, etc.) that make it difficult to be available “now.” I’ll admit, it does irk me when clients reach out with requests for “now,” as I require a bit of time to primp and prep to provide the best experience. Personally, I prefer clients who book a day ahead of time, however I do know that many clients like to fly by the seat of their pants and reach out when the inspiration strikes. I do try to accommodate these requests when possible, but I teach yoga and often sub in for other teachers, so it can be a challenge. In terms of when to move on, it is you (the client) who is making the booking request. I personally do not find it rude at all when I am unable to respond in time and a client simply says “sorry, I have booked with another provider!” If you have a specific timeframe in mind and you don’t hear back, it is perfectly okay to move on whenever you like. In terms of flat out not getting a response from providers at all, I always suggest that you pay a bit of attention to the way you initiate contact. I prioritize gentlemen who introduce themselves and indicate their desired meeting time. I am offering a very personal service and “are you available?” with no other context simply feels too transactional for me. Gentlemen who introduce themselves get a response, even when I’m busy. As for those who do not, I get back to them when I am finally freed up. Be polite and cordial, and you’ll likely get more responses from providers. Keep in mind we are always busy with something or other, and our time is valuable (both to us, and to you ). If you don’t hear back, just move on. Most of us are (unfortunately) rather used to responding to inquiries and not hearing anything further. A simple “maybe next time!” may go a long way with someone you really want to see in the future. Happy hobbying!

I think this is where most hobbyists don’t quite understand the trade from the provider’s perspective. At a most basic level, the value of a McLaren is much higher than that of a BMW. That being said, the value of a Ferrari is arguably higher than both, perhaps even due to branding alone. Ferrari doesn’t care about the economy, and they don’t care whether customers who don’t suit their standards choose their brand. Ferrari cares about the quality of their clientele, and they provide both quality products and quality customer service accordingly. Ferrari goes so far as to send cease and desist letters to Ferrari owners who modify their vehicles in a way that is not consistent with their desired branding. It’s the same concept applied by Hermes, where only loyal customers of a certain caliber can purchase Birkin bags. Like it or not, providers provide you with a luxury service. Even in luxury goods, there are tiers of both service and quality. Purchase prices reflect that.

I totally agree with the upkeep! That’s part of why I went darker 😣 I’m a natural strawberry blonde. It’s light brown, but almost red - I hate it. My roots as a blonde grew out looking so weird because I always preferred a more platinum color. Oh, well - I’m happy with it and I guess that’s all that really matters. I hope you’ve been having a good summer so far!

I hate this, honestly. From my perspective, the provider is providing a service, and just like any other service provider, she is able to set her rates as she sees fit. A little bit of education for you lovely gentlemen: A provider typically sets her rates based on the following very basic factors... 1. The current economic market. 2. Desired volume. 3. Required income. I even have a little equation for you. P=DV/RI×E Where... P is price per service that is being calculated. DV represents the desired volume. RI represents the required income of the provider. E is an economic adjustment factor (a multiplier that adjusts the price based on the current economic state, where a positive economy is a positive integer, and a negative number is a negative integer. In addition to the basic factors, we have to understand that a person who is providing a very personal and individualized service is not properly represented by an equation. Additional factors to consider may be... 1. The level of the provider's experience. 2. The "goods and services" she must pay for that can be otherwise considered "business expenses" (hair, nails, outfits, travel, etc.). 3. Investment on previous education. Some providers have formal certifications in massage, BDSM, somatic sexology, and the like. Apart from hobby-specific education, some providers have masters degrees that make them more appealing to high-end clients. 4. The provider's own unique perspective on themselves and their value on a psychological level. 5. The provider's own experiences and preferences for clients who can afford one rate vs. clients who can't. Bottom line - providers set their rates according to logical, service-based premises, combined with their own adjustments as a real human being with specific traits and experiences. I won't bore you with anymore educational materials, but please - do refer to this formula if anyones' rates are confusing to you, and if you can't afford it, move on. (Footnote: I have had a couple of people from this board who consistently reach out to me time and time again to "offer" their own price for my services. It makes you look incompetent, disrespectful, and broke...respectfully.)

I'm just curious from other ladies' perspectives here. I recently dyed my hair black from blonde and I've definitely noticed a change in my clientele. Most actually really seemed to prefer the blonde and I am saddened by this because the black hair looks really, really good on me. I had black hair back when I was a provider in Portland, OR, but was only ever into FBSM and Nuru. Maybe clients have different preferences in that space, maybe it's just been slow for me lately, I don't know. I definitely need to do an updated photoshoot. What have you ladies experienced with this?

I use Tryst and get a lot of great clients from it. However, the only primary reason I DO use it is because it’s easier to find traveling clients or clients in other cities who look at Denver ads. Lots of them don’t seem to know about TOB at all.

I have, and he’s still a nuisance, but he’s MY nuisance 🥰

I personally get a lot of website traffic from Tryst, and tons of OnlyFans subs, but every single one of my most enjoyable, respectful, and reliable clients have come from TOB. It’s a quantity vs. quality thing, in my experience.