Experience Description: News Flash! Birdman takes one for the team: Normally you know Birdman rarely complains and would rather say nothing than say something derogatory about a provider. Everybody can have a bad day. But a ripoff is another story. I was lucky I was not turned to ice. Unfortunately, the Birdman had a royal MCKENSIE turd drop from the sky onto his watchful eye-squawk! There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all. I asked for hh and she said that 120turds is the price for her precious time. Ok, off to the cheapest hotel in town 34$/night. It's her kind of place...it get's better: She's late you better wait as she ends her stop-over in COS from Dallas on here grand road trip from Cincinnati. Can't stay in one place too long got to keep mov'in and keep the fresh suckers coming...next state..next town...go..go..go. Oh, sorry, You can't do that you only paid for hh for 120 so the claim of "NO RUSHING, NO GAMES" just got repealed. Oh yeah "she has shrunk too" as the long legs she claims became fat and stubby along with everything else. Don't expect truth here--this girl is pass'in through so she can say anything she wants. No worries about reviews--here today gone tomorrow. See-ya later "nitz". You can't do this and can't do that. For a fatgirl her /hr must be in high demand in Dallas but good luck in the springs. Birdman struck a fine "bargain". I'll tell you that! That 200 kisses in COS surely gets you a pleasant beautiful classy lady here. Not so in Dallas as this "fly by night" provider can attest. The event is scheduled for 30min but our premadonna has other ideas. Time to start harping...let's go! It goes like this: Start your engines at the 3G MCKENZIE International Raceway, Vroom Vroom, ready set go....hurry up, hurry up, she yells... now passing the 1 min mark, can't yoou do this any faster, can't do that shreeks "MCKENZIE-not", Oh yeah, hurry up, my girlfriend is waiting. We pass the 2 min mark...flip over...oh yeah oh yeah do it do it she fakes. She is her own biggest fan. What's wrong can't you go faster. Step on it as 3min mile goes by. Up on 5 min's hurry hurry...time is money..someone else is going to show up and pound on the door---QWIIIIIK!, Oh no..go...go go-boy..get going there boy. Hey you are soft, what's the matter? Does that happen often? Ok, watch this. Ok, I'll flip you over and let's just get this over. Wow! Birdman is in and out in under 5 minutes and "WINS" the race. The crowd roars---cheers, hurry! Birdman has dropped the nut into a greed pit. Ta DA! Happy days are here again. MCKENZIE ,the frenzy, has done it again waiving the checkered flag. Now MCKENZIE says with a grin: get the Flock out of here! So finished, I smelled the stale air and couldn't wait to see my colorado sky and clean puffy clouds that I love so much. This reminds me of George Bernanos: The horrors which we have seen, and the still greater horrors we shall presently see, are not signs that rebels, insubordinate, untamable people are increasing in number throughout the world, but rather that there is a constant increase in the number of obedient, docile people. Hey, suckers and sheep go get her, this black diamond of coal, It's ok Birdman can take it....but why not make a game out of whining--it can be fun so let's go: Also: Indifference is the strongest force in the universe. It makes everything it touches meaningless. Love and hate don't stand a chance against it. The Ice Queen--Bravo MCKENZIE, can turn everything she touches to stone! MCKENZIE sighs, (as in: "A deep and prolonged audible inspiration or respiration of air, as when fatigued or grieved; the act of sighing." or "I could drive the boat with my sighs." --MCKENZIE). Naturally, when it comes to hobby-ing, we feckless traveling providers in Texas are accustomed to discerning that fine hair's-breadth worth of difference that makes one hopeless dipstick hobbyist slightly less awful than the other. But it does raise the question: Why bother to worry about reputation? Her hypocrisy know no bounds. Oh, it's just that there are so many cities for gypsies to find suckers. There's always south of the border as well--o-Lay! Better get to it, there's no time to waste. The MCKENZIE Motto: "Life in Dallas, Texas, taught me two things: One is that God loves you and you're going to burn in hell. The other is that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on earth and you should save it for someone you can take quickly to the cleaners." Great job MCKENZIE--way to set your standard! What class is that? we'll it's MCKENZIE! I leave you with this sweet reminder: "Greed is a fat demon with a small mouth and whatever you feed it is never enough." Oink-the short low gruff noise of the kind made by hogs Birdman never liked hogs but does regrettably accept their right to exist. Birdman has had the best and the worst in this adventure so I can truly know appreciation--thanks MCKENZIE for the lesson! Birdman out.

Experience Description: Not quite GFE but still very pleasant session with a few rules limitations but overall very accommodating and responsive. A few activities are off limits due concerns for safety TF, no lk, and no DATY (begging helps). I never had a GF who would not like DATY--very vocal and genuine overall. A great experience and the real deal although she seems new to this. She should know most hobbyests know not to ask or mention certain practical matters just wait and let it happen. She is the real deal but needs just a little more time to get used to how things work. Thanks Misty for a great time.