Favorite Little Johnny joke!

[johnnybgood]

The kids filed into class Monday morning. They were all very excited.  Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on salesmanship.

Little Sally led off.  "I sold Girl Scout cookies and I made $30" she said proudly.  "My sales approach was to appeal to the customer's civil spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success"

  "Very good", said the teacher.

  Little Debbie was next.  "I sold magazines," she said.  "I made $45 and I explained to everyone that magazines would keep them up on current events."

  "Very good, Debbie", said the teacher.

Eventually, it was Little Johnny's turn.  The teacher held her breath.  Little Johnny walked to the front of the classroom and dumped a box full of cash on the teacher's desk.

"$2,467,” he said.

"$2,467!" cried the teacher, "What in the world were you selling?"

"Toothbrushes", said Little Johnny.

"Toothbrushes", echoed the teacher.  "How could you possibly sell enough tooth brushes to make that much money?" 

"I found the busiest corner in town", said Little Johnny.  "I set up a Dip & Chip stand and I gave everybody who walked by a free sample."  They all said the same thing; "Hey, this tastes like dog poo!"  I would say, "It is dog poo.  Wanna buy a toothbrush?"

 "I used the Bernie Sanders method of giving you some crap, dressing it up so it looks good, telling you it's free, and then making you pay to get the bad taste out of your mouth."

[Riverboy]

The teacher asked the class to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence. Julie raised her hand and said, We went to my Uncles farm and the animals fascinated us. The teacher said, that's great but I wanted the word fascinate.  Robby was next and stated, Our family went to the space museum and it was fascinating. Once again the teacher expressed she wanted the word fascinate. No one else was raising their hand except little Johnny in the  back of the room. The teacher was weary of little Johnny as she had been burnt before. Finally she decided he couldn't possibly embarrass her with the word fascinate, so she called on him. Johnny stood up and said, I have a aunt who has a bright red blouse with 10 buttons. But her tits are so big she can only fascinate!!!