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About dando.shaft

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  1. Thanks for all the responses. (And sorry for the lack of paragraphs it was fairly late at night when I wrote that!) It's been more than a week since she's tried to contact me. No further emails, no further Facebook messages (I can see 5 'hidden' ones but that count isn't going up), no mail at my PO Box. I pray she gave up and found someone else. I'm sorry she needs money but she's not my responsibility. As for screening and cam models - one reason why I turned to that is the lack of options here, even expanding my horizons to a few hours away, was coming up empty. Plus I know what the girl looks like if she's a cam model - a lot of providers don't show face pictures for privacy reasons and you just have to hope and pray the face is as nice as the figure.... While not on a top tier site, she was verified and had reviews on Escort Monkey. And one mentioned experience... from Google I have an online history of a year and a half of nearly daily posts on STG.... she definitely has the experience! I've been burned too too many times (the worst by two civvy women) and I know when it's time to stop pulling the lever on the slot machine because the payout isn't going to come - when I see the pattern, I end it or ghost, which is what I tried to do here. I moved away from Denver 4 years ago so TOB ladies unfortunately are not an option unless I fly one here to me.... which I DID use to do about 10 years ago when I lived in Denver with cam models .....I do have frequent flier miles I can use.... as others have pointed out in my other thread, it could be cheaper to go to Eastern Europe. I've decided for now to do nothing. If somehow she continues to threaten, I may let her know what I do know about her. She will bring herself down as well if she tries to do that to me. But as said before, desperate people do desperate things and make choices regardless of the potential consequences because they see it as their only way out. I also see this as a sign from the Universe to just stop seeking companionship from sw and sugar babies and hopefully find someone in real life, as the Universe just seems to be cock-blocking me. I am hoping the Golden Bachelor will have women more age appropriate for me to think about dating again, as I understand so so many don't and won't. I pray the reason all this didn't work out with the sw and the 2 civvy women, pray she shows up soon! And friends, if you ever go to Pittsburgh, don't see a 24 year old chubby white girl who is named Pebbles Marie, or Arielle.
  2. The End of Escorting?

    Interesting my other post seems to have resurrected this old thread. And my situation has gotten even worse since I wrote that. My father passed so travel became more practical, but everyone I have tried to connect with in the last year or so either flaked, ghosted me, tried to scam, or just wanted too much money - one cam girl wanted $2400 for a 3 hour dinner and fun meet. Now she was hot enough to be worth it but as I wasn't so into her that I would pay that much, I passed. And now I found one who I did make a booking, but then cancelled, and now she's threatening to expose me and/or get me arrested and/or come her and get her revenge on me (see other post). Looks like my only hope is a trip to Eastern Europe after re-reading all the initial replies to my post - I know a few men in my online business group who appear to have very young Filipina wives.... but I'm just not attracted to Asians, especially darker skinned ones as you'd have in that part of the world.
  3. Met her on a webcam site.... she let me know upfront she did meets and was in the same state as I was in....we had a skype date and made arrangements to meet when I was in her city for a medical appointment (which happened to be last week) so general activities and a price were agreed to. So.... there's the evidence. But she did not respect boundaries and started asking for money for more skype dates, upfront money for our date, emergencies, etc. I told her I cancelled my appointment and wasn't ready to see her at this time (she offered to travel here, about 4 hours away) due to still having feelings for someone else I was involved with (which is partly true - and I guess that was my big mistake). She got very upset said she was counting on this money, next day asked for a cancellation fee, which was a week before when we were supposed to meet. She was out nothing but her time, and in fact by this time she had gotten nearly $500 from me for various things, and I realized even if I kept our date she was likely to not even show up. She then kept texting, calling, harassing, more emergencies, needing more money, kept calling from different numbers so blocking was no good, as I was trying desperately to ghost her. She finally said she was going to get a PI after me, so I changed my phone and cancelled my cashapp, which means I had to deny her last money request. She knew my name and number (which I understand a lot of escorts now want for screening anyway) so was able to find my online business entry and my post office. She also found my Facebook. Basically threatened to expose me to everyone in the world and now claims to be a minor even before she said 24 and her court records say she's 24. (She's stupid enough to use her real name too even though she's been on STG for a year and a half!). I found out three days after I met her online she was arrested for a M1 Misdemeanor which explains her desperation. And desperate people do desperate things. I have heard no more from her since Wednesday night (although have unread Facebook messages). And, although I found her on a cam site, she does have an entry on Erotic Monkey with two reviews..... Needless to say I am done with this lifestyle. Everyone I have attempted to meet in the last year has turned out to be a flake or scammer or really only wants to do OF, or wants four figures to meet..... I've likely had my last real life sex (versus virtual) as my dating pool at 64 is non-existant. But this isn't worth it. My tastes are too niche anyway (white chubby/BBW/SSBBW 30-50) and I've become more particular myself as I am now retired....why pay a lot of money to see someone I'm not really attracted to just to have some companionship? Yes I realize my attitude isn't helping....also been romance scammed by two women I met online who weren't sex workers..... I miss how things used to be years ago. I had so much fun in Denver and Houston and even in Oklahoma when I lived there. I have a lot of good memories at least.
  4. If anyone has gone through this, I'd appreciate a private message. I'm trying to get some legal counsel and not coming up with much other than "We can't help you until you are actually charged with something". Also want to know if I can do anything to protect myself otherwise, like a protective order, as I fear she will find where I live and show up at my house. I even sent her a cancellation fee at her request (which was a travel situation and I cancelled a week in advance) and she's still coming after me.
  5. The End of Escorting?

    Average1, it doesn't seem to be letting me reply without showing a dozen posts, but yeah it seems like I am going to have to figure out a trip somewhere (I'm in northcentral PA now but spent 8 years in Denver in the 2010's, which is how I know about this board). Thanks for your input!
  6. The End of Escorting?

    Travel is an issue because I moved from Denver to take care of my father after my mother died. He's a fall risk so can't be left alone for the time it would take to travel to say Philadelphia, see someone, drive back.... let alone to another continent. If I were to do sex tourism it would have to be European. I'm not attracted to Asian women at all. I prefer 30-50 chubby to SSBBW Caucasians. I've seen lots of gorgeous camgirls from Russia, Romania, Ukraine, etc. Not sure I want the headache of a wife - I did check out a site supposedly with Eastern European women but nearly all were young and slender. Maybe after my father passes I can take a vacation......
  7. The End of Escorting?

    Unfortunately I moved from Denver two and a half years ago to take care of my father in PA after my mother died, which makes travel difficult as he really can't be left alone for long periods of time as he is a fall risk. I'm two hours from any decent size city and three hours from a major metro. As to the pedophile comment, maybe in this community men like me are valued but in the vanilla world, from the research I have read and my experience on dating apps, even most 50-55 yo women would consider me too old to date. I'm cursed by my preferences too....I'm told I am out of my league because I prefer curvy to SSBBW build, 35-50, and Caucasian. Millions of soccers moms out there who fit that but not a lot in the sex work pool. One reason why I was so into cam sites because there are quite a few women like that online. I often wondered why more escorts don't cam. Seems it would be a great way to find someone who would be into you and willing to pay for travel etc. In the 15 or so years on cam sites I only ever met one and I did fly her from Boston to Denver to see me. Thanks for your input and encouragement Audrey!
  8. The End of Escorting?

    I know I live in a remote area where the only 'option' is STG but it seems it's getting harder to find a woman who is willing to do in person sex work. OF and cam sites make it possible for women to make money without ever having to touch a man. 10 years ago I had success meeting cam models but now all will just pretend to want to meet and then just rip you off. The sugar baby sites are full of women who see Tiktok videos claiming they can find lonely men who will pay for a virtual and/or platonic relationship. The other aspect of sugaring is that one is seeking more of a relationship than hourly dates, but most of these girls already have husbands or significant others, which makes that less likely as well. Then there is the deposit scam, even after eliminating obvious fake pics, language problems, weird text characters, I still got scammed 7 times out of 7 this year for women who wanted deposits then either sent me to vacant homes or to hotels where they would demand even more money to let me in (I left at that point). At 62 my real life dating options are limited - the 35-45ish women I prefer mostly view me like a pedophile because I'm old enough to be their father, and women my age just aren't attractive to me, most don't even want to have sex or date, and the ones who do are cougars chasing younger men. Hence escorting (when I lived in cities like Denver and Houston) and sugaring to meet my companionship needs but that's even becoming very difficult. Finding someone in a major city (I can't even get on P411 because while 'retired' I do not draw SS yet so they can't verify me) and flying them here is a cost-prohibitive option. I guess my sex life is over.
  9. Finding a provider in a small metro

    I've been on one of them in the past and it's useless for Pennsylvania; even the major metros have no more than a few posts a month.
  10. Finding a provider in a small metro

    I think so, but that is not at all the experience I seek. I want GFE not AMP.
  11. Finding a provider in a small metro

    What's so annoying is years ago, yes, I was in major metros, but had no trouble finding company, and I can only think of twice when the escort experience was not great, one was a girl who did a huge upsell but I did eventually get what I wanted from her, and another stole my wallet ("I can't find my phone") in Bakersfield CA. The great times, low triple digits.
  12. Finding a provider in a small metro

    I had thought of the gentlemens' club too (we have one very strange club here), but might be a big investment in lap dances to gather intel. that idea is shotdown here by the closing all indoor dining and clubs starting tomorrow.
  13. Finding a provider in a small metro

    Yeah its stg. As stated travel nearly impossible due to my father being a fall risk. I could get a home health aide for the weekend but that'd be a significant cost too. You'd be looking at well over a stack when you summed everything up.
  14. Finding a provider in a small metro

    I almost did that the other night while on my way to another dead end. Cute pregnant girl exactly my type in the cstore. I did strike up a conversation with her and afterwards should have just said 'Would you like a sugar daddy for Christmas?". I don't meet in the wild - in the last 30 years have dated exactly two women I met that way. All else been online sites and escorts and strippers. We have one strip club here and it's kind of a joke. And in general, other than the dive clubs, 90% of the strippers aren't my type - you do get a few that are 'thicker than a snicker'. Bringing someone in, would be very expensive - I've did it before when I lived in Denver. I am actually preferring a sugar arrangement to escorting but until I find one and I mentally recover from the last two disasters it'd be nice to find someone dependable to see a few times a month. The card idea is interesting. Thanks! Dando
  15. I used to live in the Denver metro and used to see & date ASP's/sugar babies/strippers for many years there and in my work. I stopped about five years ago due to mental health reasons. I've moved back to a small town in Pennsylvania (100k metro) to take care of my father. I had two sugar relationships which ended badly (one was actually an escort which is one reason why it ended) but now just wanting any kind of companionship and coming up empty. There has to be some kind of escort underground - my ex used social media and had many many offers, she told me she double and triple booked and always required a deposit. And there are dozens of gas trucks at all the hotels so someone's got to be taking care of these guys. But the sites I know of have virtually nothing here and I'm at least an hour and a half away from a decent metro and Philly is a few hours away. And SESTA has made things many times harder. I'm also cursed in my preferences are 30-45ish, curvy/plump/mom bod/bbw and caucasian. Travel is impossible due to my father and COVID. What I am finding is the scammers are very very good, especially since the deposit thing reduces escort seeking to a 50-100$ scratch off hoping you get lucky. I'm 0 for 6 so far and losing LOTS of money I'd rather spend on a real woman. (My budget is not that large as I'm 61 and retired). Last night I paid the deposit and got sent to a vacant house. Other than just forgetting about ever having sex again, is there any advice on how to find happiness in this life? Vanilla dating just doesnt work for me and I don't meet people organically going the escort route is really my only hope for companionship. Thanks, Dando