In response to the gun violence topic...

[TrystinTrimble]

I have been following one providers topic she posted about gun violence and school shootings...This one to be exact. It is a tough subject, and the main reason why I've recently turned back to slam poetry. The neutrality I held towards a lot of the issues in the world is now impossible, and it needs to be channeled into something that isn't...all the nastiness we see in most comment sections. To y'all and only y'all, Just want to say...

Thank you for your post. The reason we are all reading it sucks. The replies are all rich in content, All personal to the person who wrote the reply. All from the left and the right and in between. None of the discussion has geared towards the hobby we all came here to enjoy, and it is still not a shitpost. And everyone is being respectful while baring their soul on this hot button issue. So thanks for this post!

This site, this community that made TOB come to exist, it's all kinds of a good thing to me individually. Whether we all like each other or not, and whether we agree on things all the time or not, the people who contribute and keep it all alive and well, you all matter and man, y'all have some serious brains! Before I came here, I belonged to a city and hobby board that was all drama, all punters talking about providers like we are nothing but commodities and like we are here solely to please and appease a bunch of predatory, shallow, and boorish men. Reviews were written to entertain the men and were quick to tear the women down and make us feel insignificant and ugly. One thumbs down from the wrong man was the end for so many ladies then...and the most respected of those hobbyists were whoever had the longest list Of women seen, and who was able to trick or cheat us the most; and that was it. And being a provider in that city was pretty disenfranchising. Plenty of you ladies know what I'm talking about, and while I've certainly met a few assholes here in Denver, they are so few and far between once we get together and talk on TOB. Fact is, a-holes are in all cities but they seem to be scarce where we all write each other.

     I cannot say enough how much I value this little world we have.  I would love to see it more like this out in the physical world And on way more forums. Here, ladies have a voice, and the gentlemen (at least in these discussions) are a cut above the rest as far as hobbying goes. The mods are great and sometimes "hard on us" but they are FAIR. For the most part, folks I've worked with in CO are amazing! A couple of y'all are truly some of the best people I ever met. Some are not my type of snack, and some aren't into me either.   But...

ALL OF YALL MAKE THIS DIFFICULT OCCUPATION I CHOSE INTO A CAREER. Where I once felt isolation and shame, I now have a support system. Colleagues. Friends. Peers. Connections. Safety. Cameraderie. Stability. All of the things the judgey people in the world try to say we don't deserve, we have it and they can't take it all away at this point.  Many years ago, it was fairly common for icky "johns" to justify their flat out garbage by laughing and telling a provider that she should "get a real job" if she wants to be treated like a human being at all. Called us things like "hooktards" and worse. Swapped notes on how to stealth us, secretly record us or get out of paying up. I saw ladies get doxxed while mods did nothing. And those people had the balls to call US the lowlifes. Most of you ladies have seen that grossness at some point especially if you aren't from here originally. It was normal. We didn't matter. 
      We had no recourse. None. Screening was not a thing. Not every lady has survived that cycle of oppression. Some left. Some died. Some did time at some point like me, just cause someone wanted to get a lil revenge.  Some were shrouded in shame and secrecy until they went nuts. The soul tax used to be sky high, and some of us ran out of soul. I was going to, and instead I moved to Denver...
   
An industry that those guys don't want to accept and used to prey on as they wish, is self regulating in Colorado. Those beastly kerb krawling guys, are conspicuously absent on this board. The providers here do their best and get to have self esteem and we network. We pay taxes and have credit scores. We take less abuse and know we deserve love and respect.
     Those nasty ones who said "get a real job, haha" probably did not forsee us dying on this hill and kicking them down off it. Now we have real jobs. We set our salary and haggling is not so common. To them a real job was one where We worked many hours a week, worked for a crappy wage that Would never be enough, And kept us apart from our families and friends most of the time. Thanks to this board and all y'all, I do work hard, And it's not always easy but I have my own shelter, time to be a mom, and I'm not on food stamps. I will almost definitely age out of this before a guy throws me in a ditch. With any luck, I will look good doing it the whole way. This move I made, that thousand miles I ran to come here, probably saved my life in the end. A lot of old thought patterns and unhelpful personality traits are way better now. I've watched myself ditch a lot of negativity and I bitch much less. Not perfect, but just a lot of improvement. 
 

     There is still a seedy underbelly in our world, human trafficking is real and pimps still pop up in their silly hats for sure. We still have less recourse as victims than non sex workers do; and those bad guys still exist. The worst of it is so far in my past that I almost forget about it sometimes. here I sit in my 20th year of providing, there's so much to do to make things better as a whole but it really has come along way since I started. My hope for 20 years from now is that every city has a net work as good as our city does, That every abusive trafficker has run out of people to exploit and has been run out of town. That survival work and street walking and dead hooker jokes are unheard of. Where every woman who does this has a real job and not just some lucky handfuls here and there. Where discussions like the one I referred to in the beginning of this post are every day and brimming with insight. We disagree but we don't spread hate and isms and silence others just to swing our egos the hardest. With any luck, The girls that do grow up to do this won't have to fight and claw their way up to be treated like...people. It's never gonna "be abolished" and it's not a scourge. Some people will end up filling our spots down the road and they should not be automatically written off as people who threw their life away. I know I didn't. I already see it on this board, and along with strong and intelligent women I see some really terrific and neat men who make it possible. We are, as much as we can be; with it in terms of forward thinking. The hate is the poison and respectful "safe" spaces like TOB are one of hopefully many antidotes.
 

   If we can talk straight up about all of this tough stuff, Then the people spreading hate can do it too, ya know; the ones that don't come round here much anymore.  I don't know about y'all, I'm so ready to see them get with the times. Its high time they stop using ugly slurs and calling it a joke when it fails to land. I know a joke when I see one and that stuff ain't funny. We can have "god given rights" without disregarding human rights of anyone who isn't just like us, and without extinguishing the children who deserve to grow up.  They can quit their shit and guns can be interesting tools instead of a constant threat to humanity.  Politics could one day be less inflammatory and more of a jumping off point for healthy debates.  Women named Karen can maybe just be Karen and not slang for a female who stands up for herself in any manner.  Karen should not have to stfu or be made to feel too demanding Because she asked for fully cooked chicken at lunch.  Our kids should enjoy the basic amenity of going to school without being shot at and should get to go home every single day. Sex work IS work. Lives Matter. Children ARE THE FUTURE! A world that is not a war zone is not too much to fight for. They fucking deserve that if nothing else. We all do. 
 

    A hater once told ME to get a real job. So I made one, and I couldn't have done it without all you fine people. I love the great minds, the stuff we talk about, and the community we have built despite all the resistance.  Y'all are something I am thankful for, and I would like to think that intelligence will multiply and prevail in the end, and that all of the vitriol and  attacks on the beautiful things in the world will be replaced with the respect and acceptance all of you have shown me the past ten years. Every nice thing that you as individuals say do and gift out in the world adds up. Things have been real crazy lately but I hope none of you give up, much like you inspire me not to.

All my life, I have heard in the midst of a hostile environment; that one annoying ass person who would pipe in among exchanging of mean words and "jokes" with "CANT WE ALL JUST GET ALONG?!" You know what I'm saying. There's one in every office or classroom. On here, among US...we do just that. And we do it without ignoring conflict or gate keeping. It's not super simple, but we manage and I think this calls for a pat on all your backs. 
 

Thanks for being the place where I belong, and for everything y'all bring to the table. It's all valuable and all part of the solution.