This is from a guy that spent a lot of years as a DJ working in strip clubs
A lot of people think that it is easer to get the drive through window chick at the fast food place your going to hit after the strip club then the girl you just saw naked. NOT TRUE!!!! In this entry I will let you in on the secrets of getting that dream stripper you always wanted.
This is not an instant thing, I DO NOT promote using any kind of date rape drug or drugs of any kind. That’s cheating!!! Besides, the dancers can’t leave the club without a male staff escort so how the hell would you get them out of the club? Don’t try it, you’ll just end up getting arrested, or getting the crap kicked out of you. Other things to avoid, this is very important and I know these things because I worked in a strip club for over 10 years and have heard all the complaints from the dancers about the customers.
#1-DON’T BE A CHEAPSCATE. If you want to spend any time with the girls, you will have to spend money!!!! Not a lot at first and truthfully some dancers you won’t need to spend any but this is not for those guys that have “the look” is it. Buy her at least one drink and make sure to tip her on stage. If the dancer feels she will make money with you or you will at least get her drunk, you already have a better chance then all the other guys in the club.
#2-DO NOT CRY ON HER SHOULDER. This is her job, she should be the one complaining about shit to YOU, not the other way around. The more you listen the better chance you have of getting to know her. Trust me, the more drinks she has in her the more she will bitch, so refer back to #1
#3-TOUCHING YOU GOOD, TOUCHING HER BAD. When she feels comfortable with you she will start touching you. Not grabbing your dick or some shit like that, but arms, legs ect… This is not an invite for you to start grabbing her tits, but if she tries to hold your hand go for it. Your that much closer.
#4-DON’T EXPECT IT TO HAPPEN ON THE FIRST VISIT. Remember, she is there to make money. It may take a few trips to the club before she really opens up to you and decides that she would rather hang out and get drunk with you than deal with the other customers. At this point, you may be only committed to buying her drinks rather that have to tip her, if so you have done a good job!!!
#5-DON’T BE A STALKER. While I say that it will take a few trips to the club, I don’t mean everyday. At this point your not the cool guy she looks forward to seeing, but the creepy guy who has no life who she would rather avoid. You would not be the first stalker and definitely not the last.
And finally #6 DON’T GO TOO FAR OVER YOUR HEAD. Let’s be honest, if you shoot for the stars your just going to miss or ending up spending a butt load of money and a dancer that is way out of you league. Simple formula, if you’re a 5 on a scale from one to ten go for a 5,6 or 7. If you’re a 2 or 3, well… find the club in your town where strippers go to die (or the scankist club in town) and try there. But no more than 2 notches is pretty fail proof. Stay away from the most expensive club in town. These women are total bitches and are there looking for the millionaire sugar daddy’s, so unless your one of them, stay away. Your trying to get laid not married.
Ok so now you know what not to do so here is what you should do. These are some pretty easy tasks and after you read this you will think to yourself well DUH…….
#1- GET A JOB AT A STRIP CLUB. This is the easiest way to nail a stripper, period!!!!!!! DJ’s and Bartenders have the best chance because they interact with the girls the most but, bouncers and bar staff will get the trickle down effect. If you work there long enough, you have a chance of getting a lot more than one, trust me on this!!!! OK, no time for that then…..
#2- BE YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Most strippers don’t care if you’re a superhero or make ten million dollars a year (if you do then what the hell are you doing in a strip club). Outside of the club these are very normal girls for the most part, yes you have your drug infested dancers but they really are few and far between. They do laundry, go to the grocery store and pay bills just like the rest of us. They usually don’t lead any kind of extraordinary lives so you don’t have to either.
#3- DON’T LIE!!!!!!!!!!! Listen, if your going to end taking her home some night, don’t make up stuff about yourself, she will easily find out soon enough that you full of shit!
#4- MAKE HER LAUGH A LOT. Most strippers I know, as stated before, live very normal lives. If she can come to work, hang out with you and laugh her ass off and get drunk all at the same time, you might as well already be fucking her right there and then.
#5- DAY SHIFT-KIDS NIGHT SHIFT-NO KIDS. Keep this in mind for when you decided to try this. If you can deal with the single mom day shift is for you. If not, go at night.
#6- AVOID WEEKENDS. The less people in the club the better chance you have, simple math.
#7- BREAKFAST IS GOOD!!!!!! If all is going well then you will inevitability be asked if you would like to go to breakfast after the club closes. It will usually be with more dancers from the club. This is your time to shine. If you can make sure none of the other dancer think you weird or creepy and you make everyone at the table fell comfortable around you most likely your in!!! Congrats!!!! But, if all you get at the end of the meal is a hug and an “I’ll see you next time,” you have been firmly planted in the FRIENDS ZONE. Move on, really I’m not kidding, don’t even try. You’re her friend, either deal with it or spend a lot more money trying to convince her otherwise. MOVE ON!!!!!!
#8- LEAVE YOUR EMOTIONS AT THE DOOR. Your trying to get laid. Trust me, getting emotionally involved is a BAD idea. Don’t be a dick, but don’t get to close, enough said.
And finally!!!
#9- 3 MONTHS TOPS - Ok, so you end up dating or fucking a stripper, which you will if you follow my rules. Three months is about as long as you will hold on to her because that’s about all the attention span she has. If you part ways, DO NOT immediately go back to the same club and try to get another one. The rumors about you are nasty!!!!! Stay away from that one for awhile.
This will work 98% of the time if you are calm cool and collected. Don’t rush and it will happen….. a lot.
