Posted April 20, 2020 (edited) this week. But I took him for granted, wasn't vigilant enough, missed the signs and now he is gone forever. Suicide is the leading cause of death among kids his age in Colorado, and it is only getting worse. I've read a couple of places that everyone knows someone who is at risk. That doesn't mean they will do it, it means they are at risk. I'm attaching a couple of articles and I'm asking that everyone read them and to take some action. Please find that person who is in you life and get involved. Make sure they know someone cares and make sure they have something to look forward to. Believe me, the grief and guilt that comes from inaction is not something you want to try and live with. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/health-issues/conditions/emotional-problems/Pages/Ten-Things-Parents-Can-Do-to-Prevent-Suicide.aspx https://psychologybenefits.org/2013/09/23/prevent-teen-suicide/ https://intermountainhealthcare.org/blogs/topics/live-well/2018/01/it-takes-a-whole-community-to-help-prevent-teen-suicide/ The loss is final and the devastation is complete. They say the worst pain imaginable is the loss of a child, and they are correct. They say time heals wounds, but it has been over five months now and there has been no healing. I didn't know it was possible to hurt this much and for this long, and don't want anyone on here to ever have to live through this. And they won't if I have anything to say about it. I didn't do what was necessary to save him and I have to try and find a way live with that, but you still can. I know I'm not the only person on this board to have to live with the loss of a child, but it would give me a little bit of peace to think there is a chance I could be the last. Edited April 20, 2020 by Mustang87 18 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 20, 2020 I'm sorry for your loss. I hope one day you'll find some peace and forgive yourself, though it wasn't a choice you made, just one someone else made that you'll have to live with. Thanks for sharing your story, as one who's family has battled depression, I made sure to council my own son early in his life and it seems to have made a difference. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 20, 2020 A permanent solution for a temporary problem! @Mustang87 thank you for sharing your story and I too hope others find solace in your words and sites posted! 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 20, 2020 Mustang, so sorry for your loss. It is a terrible thing. A parent should never, ever have to bury a child. Both of my younger brothers committed suicide. One on our Grandmothers birthday and the other on a Christmas morning. We never saw any warning signs. Thank you for sharing this intimate, private time in your life with us. And thank you for sharing the links to the sites. Hopefully even one life can be saved from this I am so sorry you have had to deal with that pain. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 20, 2020 @Mustang87, I am so very sorry.👼 I can not begin to imagine your pain, or any pain as deep. Nothing is ever the same... premature deaths are especially difficult, and pain ridden. I hope you have a good support system. This really is a form of trauma. If you ever want to talk, I’m here.♥️🙏 This is a good message as it seems we do have an epidemic with our younger generation. Thank you for the reminders to be aware, vigilant, and most of all to take action. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 20, 2020 (edited) Mustang, please accept my deepest sympathies. Yes, it hurts to lose a child; it’s a pain that never quite goes away (lost my first born 40some years ago). Bystanders never understand suicide. It’s such a personal burden. Depression can reach unfathomable depths. I remember a time when my long term goal was to see the next day’s sunset. Don’t let your loss drag you down that dark path. Reach out - you are not alone. Edited April 20, 2020 by Bit Banger 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 20, 2020 " Love what you have before life teaches you to love what you have lost " Im so sorry for your loss...... I could never imagine going thru what you have been thru. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 20, 2020 @Mustang87 I salute your courage in posting this to help others, friend. Nothing compares to the loss of a child but I hope the pain at least dulls a bit over time 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 21, 2020 My best friend lost her daughter in Jan from a drug over does , seeing her pain is so hard as my friends feel she missed the signs Mustang sorry for your family's loss .. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 21, 2020 Mustang, I can't imagine how much this hurts. How miserable. I'm very sorry. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 21, 2020 My deepest condolences on your loss. I hope that you find strength in love ones and family to help you through this awful tragedy. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 21, 2020 My prayers are for you and your family tonight. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 21, 2020 I am so sorry for your loss of your precious son may he rest in peace. My thoughts are with you during the difficult time hang in there. You know if you EVER need anything I am here for you. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 21, 2020 On 4/20/2020 at 11:06 AM, Mustang87 said: I know I'm not the only person on this board to have to live with the loss of a child, but it would give me a little bit of peace to think there is a chance I could be the last. My friends and family members that I have confidence and confided in have gone through similar at risk situations have said the same thing to me in times of need, which was, try to not beat yourself up from the decisions made as you hoped you done what was needed at the time. I wish you well and sorry for your loss. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 21, 2020 11 hours ago, Mustang87 said: this week. But I took him for granted, wasn't vigilant enough, missed the signs and now he is gone forever. Suicide is the leading cause of death among kids his age in Colorado, and it is only getting worse. I've read a couple of places that everyone knows someone who is at risk. That doesn't mean they will do it, it means they are at risk. I'm attaching a couple of articles and I'm asking that everyone read them and to take some action. Please find that person who is in you life and get involved. Make sure they know someone cares and make sure they have something to look forward to. Believe me, the grief and guilt that comes from inaction is not something you want to try and live with. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/health-issues/conditions/emotional-problems/Pages/Ten-Things-Parents-Can-Do-to-Prevent-Suicide.aspx https://psychologybenefits.org/2013/09/23/prevent-teen-suicide/ https://intermountainhealthcare.org/blogs/topics/live-well/2018/01/it-takes-a-whole-community-to-help-prevent-teen-suicide/ The loss is final and the devastation is complete. They say the worst pain imaginable is the loss of a child, and they are correct. They say time heals wounds, but it has been over five months now and there has been no healing. I didn't know it was possible to hurt this much and for this long, and don't want anyone on here to ever have to live through this. And they won't if I have anything to say about it. I didn't do what was necessary to save him and I have to try and find a way live with that, but you still can. I know I'm not the only person on this board to have to live with the loss of a child, but it would give me a little bit of peace to think there is a chance I could be the last. First of all let me say I'm so very sorry for your loss. I for one can't believe what you are going through. I wish I had all the answers to all the HARD questions, but I do not. All I can offer is my sad consonances. Once again, I'm so very sorry for your loss. Makes me so sad also. Peace to you and your family, I know that might feel hollow. But I wish you and yours the best. Peace to your broken heart. Please don't blame yourself for this tragic turn of advents..It was beyond your control. Peace to you.... 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 21, 2020 My mom and her brother were real close. We spend holidays together we went on vacations together. That all changed when I was 17. My cousin took his own life at 15. My uncle became withdrawn and we only really talked to my aunt after that. Their other son moved to another state next year when her turned 18. That one incident changed both our families and it never recovered. My uncle was devastated by this and died about 10 years after that. I am sure his depression led to his early death. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 21, 2020 ❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️ there are no words for such a pain of losing a child. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2020 On 4/20/2020 at 0:12 PM, Bit Banger said: Mustang, please accept my deepest sympathies. Yes, it hurts to lose a child; it’s a pain that never quite goes away (lost my first born 40some years ago. Mustang, sincere condolences on your loss. As with you and Bit Banger,I too lost a child.My only son was murdered at age 5 and he would be in his 30s today. Its a pain that resurfaces when one least expects it. Thoughtless school bullying causes many teenagers to take their own life.Had a heart to heart talk with my next door neighbors eighteen year old this week, (he does yard work for me ) when he said the best part of coronavirus was not having to endure being picked on and expressed wanting an end to life. hopefully,he is now talked out of it. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2020 Mustang, I am so sorry for your loss. Something like this can feel overwhelming. Though I don't have children, I have had some clients and some very close friends die by suicide. And, to be honest, I've had suicidal thoughts in the past. Having someone to talk to, or just someone to listen without judgement is so important. Nothing can eliminate the feelings of grief and loss, but know that you don't have to feel them by yourself. I appreciate your genuine, heartfelt post and know you are not alone. The responses to your post show that this community can be so caring and compassionate. Take care of yourself. Grieve fully. The feelings of loss and grief are part of what makes us human. We are connected by our losses, not just by our gains. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 29, 2020 On 4/21/2020 at 8:13 AM, valconxen said: My mom and her brother were real close. We spend holidays together we went on vacations together. That all changed when I was 17. My cousin took his own life at 15. My uncle became withdrawn and we only really talked to my aunt after that. Their other son moved to another state next year when her turned 18. That one incident changed both our families and it never recovered. My uncle was devastated by this and died about 10 years after that. I am sure his depression led to his early death. This actually a very big concern of mine. I've never been the most social person as it is, and it's harder and harder and to be around people. To make things worse I find that sometimes people avoid me these days because they don't know what to say to me. I don't think I will end up like your uncle, and I'm really trying not to, but I think it helps to be aware of those types of pit falls. Thanks for sharing that story with me, and all of us. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 29, 2020 On 4/22/2020 at 8:22 AM, JRWolfe said: Mustang, sincere condolences on your loss. As with you and Bit Banger,I too lost a child.My only son was murdered at age 5 and he would be in his 30s today. Its a pain that resurfaces when one least expects it. Thoughtless school bullying causes many teenagers to take their own life.Had a heart to heart talk with my next door neighbors eighteen year old this week, (he does yard work for me ) when he said the best part of coronavirus was not having to endure being picked on and expressed wanting an end to life. hopefully,he is now talked out of it. I'm so happy to read this and think it is great that you took the time to talk to a teen that was in your life that might be in jeopardy. Those types of interactions can literally save lives. Bullying wasn't the issue with my son, but I know it is for many and is such and awful and thoughtless thing. Thank you for sharing this with everyone. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 29, 2020 @Mustang87. just seeing your child fall and get hurt or fall sick hurts as fuck deep inside. Only a parent would know the feeling especially if the relationship is stronger than just being a parent. Losing your child must feel horrible ... i bet the world will never be the same. My "sorry for your loss" won't change shit. I am glad you are man enough to talk about it. ... I ve seen your posts and maybe even we exchanged pms but never thought who is the person behind it ... FUCK THE WORLD AND FUCK WHO EVER, GOD, IS NOT BEING FAIR TO ALL HUMANS 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 30, 2020 On 4/20/2020 at 11:06 AM, Mustang87 said: this week. But I took him for granted, wasn't vigilant enough, missed the signs and now he is gone forever. Suicide is the leading cause of death among kids his age in Colorado, and it is only getting worse. I've read a couple of places that everyone knows someone who is at risk. That doesn't mean they will do it, it means they are at risk. I'm attaching a couple of articles and I'm asking that everyone read them and to take some action. Please find that person who is in you life and get involved. Make sure they know someone cares and make sure they have something to look forward to. Believe me, the grief and guilt that comes from inaction is not something you want to try and live with. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/health-issues/conditions/emotional-problems/Pages/Ten-Things-Parents-Can-Do-to-Prevent-Suicide.aspx https://psychologybenefits.org/2013/09/23/prevent-teen-suicide/ https://intermountainhealthcare.org/blogs/topics/live-well/2018/01/it-takes-a-whole-community-to-help-prevent-teen-suicide/ The loss is final and the devastation is complete. They say the worst pain imaginable is the loss of a child, and they are correct. They say time heals wounds, but it has been over five months now and there has been no healing. I didn't know it was possible to hurt this much and for this long, and don't want anyone on here to ever have to live through this. And they won't if I have anything to say about it. I didn't do what was necessary to save him and I have to try and find a way live with that, but you still can. I know I'm not the only person on this board to have to live with the loss of a child, but it would give me a little bit of peace to think there is a chance I could be the last. You have become such a special person to me and I feel so incredibly blessed to know you. My heart hurts for you and this sucks. It never gets better and you just learn to live a different happy. God bless you sweet man and I absolutely adore you and will keep checking in with you🙏❤ Life will go on and you will find the beauty to reach out to touch. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 30, 2020 I don't know what to say that hasn't already been said. You have a family that's still here and we are all here ANYTIME you need ANYTHING ❤️ you don't have to go through this alone. I have a feeling that the way the world is right now, suicide is going to be something that we hear a lot more about.... 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 30, 2020 My deepest condolences I can’t imagine how that feels, I don’t know how I could even go on after something like that. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted August 20, 2022 (edited) It’s been a while since you made this post. Sending my spiritual comfort Reiki prayers to.you and all that have been a part of your son’s life. Edited August 20, 2022 by Kali Sensual Reiki 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted August 21, 2022 Sorry for your loss. Wish there was something I could say or do to ease your pain but that wouldn't help much. As long as you keep him in your heart, there will always be a piece of him at your side. 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted August 23, 2022 On 8/19/2022 at 10:33 PM, Kali Sensual Reiki said: It’s been a while since you made this post. Sending my spiritual comfort Reiki prayers to.you and all that have been a part of your son’s life. On 8/20/2022 at 7:03 PM, tide32 said: Sorry for your loss. Wish there was something I could say or do to ease your pain but that wouldn't help much. As long as you keep him in your heart, there will always be a piece of him at your side. Thank you for your kind thoughts and prayers. Also, please keep in mind that, unfortunately, I'm not the only member of this community to have suffered such a loss. Please keep those soles in your thoughts and prayers as well. And more importantly please reach out to people you know who might be in trouble. Especially ones you've not heard from in a while. Don't accept "I'm fine" as an answer. Please trust me when I say that the ones who are truly in trouble, are the ones least likely to seek, or ever accept help. Don't wait until it is too late to finally recognize the signs that were clearly there all along. 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted August 24, 2022 7 hours ago, Mustang87 said: Thank you for your kind thoughts and prayers. Also, please keep in mind that, unfortunately, I'm not the only member of this community to have suffered such a loss. Please keep those soles in your thoughts and prayers as well. And more importantly please reach out to people you know who might be in trouble. Especially ones you've not heard from in a while. Don't accept "I'm fine" as an answer. Please trust me when I say that the ones who are truly in trouble, are the ones least likely to seek, or ever accept help. Don't wait until it is too late to finally recognize the signs that were clearly there all along. @Mustang87 you are more then correct I have you and a special lady also a part of this website are in a reiki Jar I will continue to pray. If anyone else is in need of blessing and prayers? Please get in touch with me by text or PM. I will be more than happy to send comfort and healing. Living with serious bought a of depression, health related, you name it. I am reiki ❤️ just don’t give up your western meds without talking to your medical doctor first. I am Level 3 teacher of three different understandings of reiki. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
