Posted January 8, 2019 (edited) First, let state how deeply grateful I am for this hobby, for the exceptional ladies who define the finest levels of companionship, for the review process and the community. For the intelligent, interesting, compassionate ladies who love what they do. O' the misery from which we gents are spared thanks to this hidden oasis of pleasure. Having dabbled on one of those dating sites with some intermittent successes, my activity these past couple months have been a tad more concentrated than usual, only because there have been some promising nibbles (so to speak) which failed to pan out. One thing that I often wonder is, do I unconsciously project a certain aloofness to the civilian dating populace from my inadequately concealed confidence? Maybe I unknowingly & unintentionally project the impression that vastly exquisite pleasures can still be mine (as long as I remain courteous, do my research, follow the rules, etc...), thus branding myself within that other group of companionship seekers? I don't know. There have been a handful of success stories over the years for me, a few ladies with whom I have remained friends to this day. Anyway, the following situations have presented themselves in my most recent extracurricular experimentation: 1. Decent looking lady, cool tatts on her titties quickly throws me her number and we are off and texting, getting acquainted. She understandably wishes to "take her time" prior to getting intimate, even hints that "maybe" more pics might be available on request. Too soon for me to ask. In regard to meeting, I respond that I am patient... without revealing exactly WHY I can be patient. There appeared to be some promising potential here. The following day, I receive some curt messages in a mildly accusatory tone, I gathered, because my dating profile showed a green light indicating that I had been online after she had already provided her number to me. After pointing out that she herself had to have also been on the site in order to see my online status, I added that she was now beginning to come across to me as "insecure, manipulative and frankly, just a little bit off." That ended that. 2. Second mature lady from Greely: "Denver is just too far for a relationship, sorry. Best of luck in your search." Biting my tongue (or fingers) I refrained from responding that a mere 60 minute drive - mine, not hers - shouldn't be an impediment to dating. When I was 23, my girlfriend attended UNC and every weekend we were up there screwing like rabbits in her dorm. 3. The most recent exchange, perhaps the most universal example is this one: After some nice messaging back and forth over several days: "So, what are you looking for? I am tired of guys who just want to be fwb. I am really ready for a relationship..." Did not hear back after giving my opinion: that a deep and lasting relationship is a divine gift. Sometimes it is not in the cards for everyone. And (in my opinion) it is placing the cart before the horse for one to have a plan for a serious relationship without yet having met the other person; that only face to face meetings can reveal its potential. Not a popular response. Sorry. 4. Most typical is the ghosting phenomenon. Not the paranormal kind. This is where things are progressing well and then all communication ends suddenly. I will not send another message in this situation. No big deal. Why? Because pleasure, regardless, awaits me. Thank you... ❤❤❤ and thank you. -RJ Edited January 8, 2019 by Robert Johnson 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 8, 2019 I have learned that foreplay starts with the first words out of my mouth.. If I say the wrong thing in the morning, it will be a lonely night. I learned that foreplay is an all day thing and starts the moment I wake up. I spent more night alone that I can count. You have the same issues. It is not so much what you say, but how you say it. Telling someone that they are coming across as "insecure, manipulative and frankly, just a little bit off" is the same as telling her that she mentally deranged and overall crazy.. That is not what she wants to hear and no surprise to learn that she moved on. When you say .."it is placing the cart before the horse for one to have a plan for a serious relationship..." the gal hears, that you may or may not be looking for a long term serious relationship. It comes across as you are just string her along in hope for sex. She moves on. You can say the same thing in a soft more carrying way. You could have said that you where looking forward to meeting her in person and if you two where made for each other it would be a divine gift and one you would embrace and cherished everyday of your life. Overall, I found the less I say the better.. the less chance I have in saying the wrong thing. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 8, 2019 Jeeze, having been married for the past 30 years I was spared this crap. Why in hell would you want to text a bunch back and forth "getting to know each other?" before you even lock eyes, much less lips. Is this the only way people date these days? Can't you still join mutual-interest clubs (hiking, biking, birding, fishing, etc.) to meet folks? I, for one, could never bring myself to try this "online dating" crap. Seems like you would have a better chance of falling in love with a working girl as your soul mate (and enjoy the search a hell of a lot more). I did think it would be cool to date Chelsea from Match.com, but I have noticed that she has been single and using the same pictures for about four years, probably fake too: 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 8, 2019 15 minutes ago, BadBoy said: I did think it would be cool to date Chelsea from Match.com, but I have noticed that she has been single and using the same pictures for about four years, probably fake too: I see she has a twin sister named Courtney https://ispot.tv/a/diqQ 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 8, 2019 (edited) That's right, it's Courtney. No wonder I had such a difficult time finding her photo on Google! Edited January 8, 2019 by BadBoy 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 9, 2019 If you are looking to start a family...by all means find a long term civilian partner. If not, do yourself a huge solid and stick with the hourly sporting ladies. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 9, 2019 Yep, a lot less brain damage and no future divorce in site. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 9, 2019 The sad truth is any lady over 20 ish is looking for the same thing. Hasn't changed since the beginning of time. A strong mate that can look after her. Just like the animal planet the only female that doesn't is a praying mantis. Kinda like a sporting lady with only one agenda. And after 45 they have usually heard and seen enough bs that they are cautious and a little jaded. But keep looking because there always is that diamond out there. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 9, 2019 Also I have found that if you and she develop a "regular" relationship you can have a companion you can converse with and she will let you blow of steam for the price of a an hour. Much cheaper that supporting another much less the costs associatedwith divorce. C 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 9, 2019 I'm with ColoradoBadBoy there also. It seems like we have taken our search for connection and even finding a mate in life to shopping "Amazon Prime style" in our jammies from the comfort of our home (or for some guys...their Mom's basements ) ....and then...when it doesn't yield the results or connection that we wish ...it becomes about the people and disappointment vs the medium (ie: Internet) used to try to find the human connection... IF i was looking (and I'm not - my sexy gent clients and career and pastimes take up so much time) ... I would Never ever go internet dating again. You'll find me in a hiking/mountain climbing/flyfishing/running or enjoying nature type club...and let what happens happens as i look into someone's eyes and probably tease the crap out of them. Call me Old-School but we struggle with that also in escort/companion world. It use to be more of a gent introducing himself and requesting a paid date...turned into "sending appt request form" , acronym hunters , one-liners, "hey", "u up?" .. and ordering a woman like a pizza.... Everything has become too big of a "business" Personal Connection should not become extinct. Some of us are truly working on preserving the viewpoint. As for women in their 40's...yes...we've seen a world of BS...but many still are incredibly optimistic and happy by being uber selective with our company (and not wasting time with those incompatible)...whether in escort world or "RL" world. I intend to be a woman well into my 90's with a sly smirk on my face, sexy stories in my heart and a fond memory of the men I've enjoyed....albeit by the hour, 90min or overnight... Play Nicely all! xoxo 11 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 13, 2019 Anyone over 40 who can't find a suitable relationship is either a true introvert, is socially defective, or has unrealistic standards. For me it's (D) all of the above. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 13, 2019 Part of me wishes I had gotten to experience the online dating world and who knows, maybe one day I will. Married 20+ years I still find it entertaining to chat up an attractive woman and mildly flirt with her and the fact that I don't push for it to go beyond that I guess is what makes me relaxed. I know it's not going anywhere so the pressure is off and she's not waiting for the uncomfortable proposition moment so she's more relaxed too. I miss dating and meeting women for the first time, the curiosities about one another. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 13, 2019 34 minutes ago, fork said: Anyone over 40 who can't find a suitable relationship is either a true introvert, is socially defective, or has unrealistic standards. For me it's (D) all of the above. Refreshing to hear you admit it instead of blaming your lack of success on the women. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 13, 2019 1 hour ago, fork said: Anyone over 40 who can't find a suitable relationship is either a true introvert, is socially defective, or has unrealistic standards. For me it's (D) all of the above. You too? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 14, 2019 On 1/8/2019 at 1:48 PM, Robert Johnson said: First, let state how deeply grateful I am for this hobby, for the exceptional ladies who define the finest levels of companionship, for the review process and the community. For the intelligent, interesting, compassionate ladies who love what they do. O' the misery from which we gents are spared thanks to this hidden oasis of pleasure. Having dabbled on one of those dating sites with some intermittent successes, my activity these past couple months have been a tad more concentrated than usual, only because there have been some promising nibbles (so to speak) which failed to pan out. One thing that I often wonder is, do I unconsciously project a certain aloofness to the civilian dating populace from my inadequately concealed confidence? Maybe I unknowingly & unintentionally project the impression that vastly exquisite pleasures can still be mine (as long as I remain courteous, do my research, follow the rules, etc...), thus branding myself within that other group of companionship seekers? I don't know. There have been a handful of success stories over the years for me, a few ladies with whom I have remained friends to this day. Anyway, the following situations have presented themselves in my most recent extracurricular experimentation: 1. Decent looking lady, cool tatts on her titties quickly throws me her number and we are off and texting, getting acquainted. She understandably wishes to "take her time" prior to getting intimate, even hints that "maybe" more pics might be available on request. Too soon for me to ask. In regard to meeting, I respond that I am patient... without revealing exactly WHY I can be patient. There appeared to be some promising potential here. The following day, I receive some curt messages in a mildly accusatory tone, I gathered, because my dating profile showed a green light indicating that I had been online after she had already provided her number to me. After pointing out that she herself had to have also been on the site in order to see my online status, I added that she was now beginning to come across to me as "insecure, manipulative and frankly, just a little bit off." That ended that. 2. Second mature lady from Greely: "Denver is just too far for a relationship, sorry. Best of luck in your search." Biting my tongue (or fingers) I refrained from responding that a mere 60 minute drive - mine, not hers - shouldn't be an impediment to dating. When I was 23, my girlfriend attended UNC and every weekend we were up there screwing like rabbits in her dorm. 3. The most recent exchange, perhaps the most universal example is this one: After some nice messaging back and forth over several days: "So, what are you looking for? I am tired of guys who just want to be fwb. I am really ready for a relationship..." Did not hear back after giving my opinion: that a deep and lasting relationship is a divine gift. Sometimes it is not in the cards for everyone. And (in my opinion) it is placing the cart before the horse for one to have a plan for a serious relationship without yet having met the other person; that only face to face meetings can reveal its potential. Not a popular response. Sorry. 4. Most typical is the ghosting phenomenon. Not the paranormal kind. This is where things are progressing well and then all communication ends suddenly. I will not send another message in this situation. No big deal. Why? Because pleasure, regardless, awaits me. Thank you... ❤❤❤ and thank you. -RJ Make a profile of a woman. Use pics on the internet. It took 10 seconds to get a waterfall of dick pics emailed to me. I wish I could say I was shocked. To the guy on YouTube who said forget online dating. Work on yourself. I salute you. You will find far better options in real life if you throw yourself out there rather than behind a keyboard. Unfortunately it also mostly comes with the usual baggage. On that point, I think we can agree. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 16, 2019 On 1/14/2019 at 1:02 PM, Vassago said: Make a profile of a woman. Use pics on the internet. It took 10 seconds to get a waterfall of dick pics emailed to me. I wish I could say I was shocked. To the guy on YouTube who said forget online dating. Work on yourself. I salute you. You will find far better options in real life if you throw yourself out there rather than behind a keyboard. Unfortunately it also mostly comes with the usual baggage. On that point, I think we can agree. Sound words from all. I received a taste of my own medicine in that a lady whom I felt that I truly resonated with and thus was fastly becoming e-smitten (did I just coin another phrase?) seemed to be constantly on the dating site herself, making improvements to her self description and shifting her pics to what I presume to be marketing herself, which is her absolute right & privilege as a random stranger to me and one who has access to the internet. Recognizing that I had been simply playing out a scenario inside my head - a recipe for failure - I politely canceled our upcoming Sunday brunch citing work pressures, an excuse that is more true than not. Sometimes you just have to stop. And when something has worked for a long time (i.e., paid companionship), you must not stop. For the record, & this might surprise certain folks as the OP of this thread, I actually do get out from behind the computer & i-phone & do so quite regularly. I am a musician who performs in Denver and all along the Front Range with a small amount of travel within no less than 6 different local music projects. You'd think this would be conducive to meeting a good lady; it is really not. But that could be my fault. Playing in a band worked its magic in this area while I was a young man in my 20's but that is no longer true. I feel that I have made a wise decision. -RJ 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 16, 2019 You should have skipped the meeting at the Crossroads too. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 16, 2019 3 hours ago, BadBoy said: You should have skipped the meeting at the Crossroads too. But the only reason I've been showing up is because the devil really wants his guitar lessons. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 23, 2019 Update: The lady whom I canceled on texted me and then left a VM expressing her desire to reschedule. We did later meet - she is a gorgeous, sexy, 61 year-old grandmother and widow (2 years). She came to see the final set of a musical performance of mine after her shift as a nurse. She enjoyed herself. At her request the next week, we watched the lunar eclipse separately from our own residences. During the text exchanges I was sending her pictures taken from my phone of the progression of the eclipse. It was a bonding moment & she told me that this will signify a "new beginning" and that it was nice for us to start a relationship with "magic on our side." Nice. Fast forward - during another evening of texting, this cutie asked whether I preferred "shaved or natural". My response was demure and vague. "When a woman takes my breath away, she can self groom in any manner she likes." I think I did well. We will meet again for breakfast today. We already have a date planned for Saturday but she felt that Saturday seemed "too far off." At brunch I will provide her with a slip of paper with not 2, but five (5) grooming styles in order of my personal preference. This in no was contradicts my original response. I will start, "I took the liberty of making out a list of feminine self grooming techniques that I enjoy in order of preference - there are at least five..." 1. Clean shaven 2. Clean shaven with 3 to 4 days stubble 3. Landing strip 4. Trimmed 5. Au Naturale This should make an impression on her. I am also bringing another list of my BJ conclusion preferences along with a third list that relates to one general item on the BJ conclusion list. I would share but I feel that this information may be too risqué for this venue. 😉 I may be outta here for a while. -RJ 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 23, 2019 1 hour ago, Robert Johnson said: .... I will start, "I took the liberty of making out a list of feminine self grooming techniques that I enjoy in order of preference - there are at least five..." 1. Clean shaven 2. Clean shaven with 3 to 4 days stubble 3. Landing strip 4. Trimmed 5. Au Naturale This should make an impression on her. ... I would move #2 to #4, possibly to #5. ☹️ I’m more into texture than visuals. Good luck 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 23, 2019 This has been informative. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 24, 2019 12 hours ago, Robert Johnson said: At brunch I will provide her with a slip of paper with not 2, but five (5) grooming styles in order of my personal preference. This in no was contradicts my original response. I'm thinking that's not going to go over well ... we are waiting for the status report Your text message answer was a good one, leave it at that! 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 24, 2019 2 minutes ago, fork said: I'm thinking that's not going to go over well ... we are waiting for the status report Your text message answer was a good one, leave it at that! I agree. Leave it at that and let things naturally progress. Providing lists seems a little overboard. If anything just talk naturally if the topic comes up. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 24, 2019 35 minutes ago, fork said: I'm thinking that's not going to go over well ... 32 minutes ago, K2dnvrfun said: I agree. Leave it at that Awwwwee come on guys. I just got back from the store with plenty of popcorn. This was sounding like fun ...... in a disaster written all over it sort of way 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 24, 2019 Well, the lunch went well. She found my list charming. However, the night before, this woman admitted to me that she was "batshit crazy" (her own words). I just can't seem to get a break here! LOL. 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 24, 2019 6 hours ago, Robert Johnson said: Well, the lunch went well. She found my list charming. However, the night before, this woman admitted to me that she was "batshit crazy" (her own words). I just can't seem to get a break here! LOL. Sounds like she is a perfectly average female what's the problem? 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 24, 2019 There’s bat shit crazy and then there is BAT SHIT CRAZY 😱. Which one is she? 0 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 24, 2019 How hot is she, cause the amount of crazy you can handle is inversely proportional to how hot she is 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted January 24, 2019 9 minutes ago, K2dnvrfun said: How hot is she, cause the amount of crazy you can handle is inversely proportional to how hot she is I can relate. I am 62 though, and this lady might just make a good BSC sub. 😁 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
