Calisurfgirl

Perception

56 posts in this topic

So granted when you are a provider and stumble into a session with someone that you would date? It sucks, that is for sure. Realistically this is not “Pretty Woman”. A business tycoon is not going to storm my condo. LOL. Is it possible? Not the movie scene but an actual possibility of a relationship. If this was Vegas I would bet on the house for sure. 

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1 hour ago, Calisurfgirl said:

So granted when you are a provider and stumble into a session with someone that you would date? It sucks, that is for sure. Realistically this is not “Pretty Woman”. A business tycoon is not going to storm my condo. LOL. Is it possible? Not the movie scene but an actual possibility of a relationship. If this was Vegas I would bet on the house for sure. 

Keep your eye on the target, stay the course. ;)

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Very true, have continuously done so. Many sacrifices have been made through the rigorous matriculation attending medical school. 

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30 minutes ago, stevie-2249 said:

probably isn’t gonna work out unless you stop providing but for short term, maybe

Nobody likes him. :cool:            :P

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1 minute ago, tide32 said:

Nobody likes him. :cool:            :P

I love my Stevie

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It would take a very secure and open minded man to be able to handle it. And also a very mature and compassionate one to not judge💕but we’re all going through our own processes & maybe it’s a little far fetched fantasy that may or may not lead to a road of drama😑Shall we all just marry our best girlfriends? 😂😂Hey they’d be cool with it Haha.  Best to not have expectations everrrrr especially in this business as the independent type but stranger things have happened! Hell I’d be happy to have more *friends* that we’re cool with it. Im rooting for you Calisurfgirl~ 💋

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You'll read stories here on the Board of people--providers and clients--who have done so. Some successfully, others not. (I tried it once and it didn't last--not from lack of love). I'm not sure which odds are lesser: finding a client who is genuinely okay with dating and even becoming emotionally involved with a provider who continues to provide; or the provider changing her vocation/profession (if providing is her main source of income) to make room for that new relationship...

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Hey, Stevie , I think tide meant that tongue in cheek. I wouldn’t waste much time analyzing it. I think your all right even if I disagree with you on some viewpoints. ☘️

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5 hours ago, stevie-2249 said:

Wtf 😳

I'm just messing with you Stevie. :P

Or am I. B) Only the shadow knows. :rolleyes:

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5 hours ago, mountainrider33 said:

The provider I was seeing gave me a very worried look when I told them how many providers I'd seen in the last 4 months.

Déjà vu. :huh:

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9 hours ago, mountainrider33 said:

The provider I was seeing gave me a very worried look when I told them how many providers I'd seen in the last 4 months.

Was she worried because you were seeing too many, or too few?

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I always go in with the assumption that my play mate is married, or is single and does not want complications. That is the case for my 2 ATF's. Our time is wonderful, then we go home. 

I have tried the dating thing... we're still good friends, but briscorp and Stevie are correct IMO.

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13 hours ago, Calisurfgirl said:

So granted when you are a provider and stumble into a session with someone that you would date? It sucks, that is for sure. Realistically this is not “Pretty Woman”. A business tycoon is not going to storm my condo. LOL. Is it possible? Not the movie scene but an actual possibility of a relationship. If this was Vegas I would bet on the house for sure. 

I love this post, because it communicates so much on so many levels.  First, thanks CSG, for sharing with us and asking an interesting question.  I'm not going to answer the question, since I have no insights, but what I found really interesting is the fact that CSG is sharing with us how incredibly rare it is to be visited by a gentleman she would ever even actually consider dating.  It's a bit of a cold slap, but appreciated none the less, because we gentlemen need the gentle reminder from time to time that it is all just an illusion, which doesn't make it less enjoyable, but it is important to recognize that it is, after all, usually just an illusion.

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As usual, Saint Joni had it pretty close to right:

Moons and Junes and Ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way you feel
As every fairy tale comes real
I've looked at love that way

But now it's just another show
You leave 'em laughing when you go
And if you care, don't let them know
Don't give yourself away

I've looked at love from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
It's love's illusions I recall
I really don't know love at all

"Both Sides Now," Joni Mitchell

 

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Anything is possible, you have adult entertainment actors who are married while their partners continue to work.  It just has to involve a lot of communication and honesty about feelings and expectations. 

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16 minutes ago, Bravo1 said:

Anything is possible, you have adult entertainment actors who are married while their partners continue to work.  It just has to involve a lot of communication and honesty about feelings and expectations

^ this ^

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6 minutes ago, mountainrider33 said:

Too many.  She looked at me like I might have an issue, even though it was 15 in 4 months

That’s less than one per week. In these parts, cowboy, that makes you nearly celibate 😉

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7 minutes ago, mountainrider33 said:

Too many.  She looked at me like I might have an issue, even though it was 15 in 4 months

Damn if that is the case, I quess 9 in 5 days means I have a real problem then. Tide32 is right, i am a slut.🤫🤫

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3 minutes ago, goodguy69 said:

Damn if that is the case, I quess 9 in 5 days means I have a real problem then. Tide32 is right, i am a slut.🤫🤫

Ding, ding, ding! We have a new mar-ho-thon champion! Nine visits in five days! We have a new King Slut! Long live the King.

Edited by BadBoy
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2 hours ago, mountainrider33 said:

I told her the most I've seen is 4 in a week and I swear she was thinking I'm a sex addict or at least that's how she looked at me

Really? I'm an everydayer. To me that just shows that you can keep up. She should have appreciated your endurance and enthusiasm. :D

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3 hours ago, mountainrider33 said:

I told her the most I've seen is 4 in a week and I swear she was thinking I'm a sex addict or at least that's how she looked at me

She don't want to give up that much free sex!

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It does happen. I loved, and lived with, an escort for about 8 years. The last two years we were together, she changed careers, and started a regular job, which she is extremely good at. We drifted apart (large age difference / career changes for us both), and she fell in love with another. (I'm very happy for her!)

Why she ever fell for me, I'll never know (not an adonis, nor wealthy)! Wonderful memories, though! :)

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Cal Surf Girl;

When I worked the graveyard shift at a hotel on Colorado Blvd, occasionally a working gal would come into the hotel. On her way out, she would always stop by the front desk where I was working to chat for a few minutes. The shift was mostly balancing the books, working alone during the night hours so the company was very welcomed. I enjoyed our conversations. She had a warm personality, she was kind and caring. I wanted to see more of her but as a possible friend. I wanted to ask her out but didn't want her to think I was asking to be a client and I didn't want her to think I was looking for anything for free. I was a bit shy and I never asked her out and I lost that opportunity for ever.

If she would have said to me, "If you where to ask me on an old fashion date where we get to know each other, you take me home and walk me to the door, give me a timid kiss good night before we go our own ways, I would be inclined to accept", my life might be different today.

It can be just as hard for him to ask you out on a date as you are finding it to ask him. If it is important to you, I would suggest finding a way to let him know you might be interested in his friendship.

Good Luck

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It's most certainly a long shot that a relationship coming from hobbying is going to work out in the long run but that's mostly true of any relationship honestly.

Of 5 relationships I've been an outside observer on:

1 tanked but due to outside circumstances and the provider had retired for two years so I would say not the issue. Married.

1 is struggling very hard from a multitude of issues this being one but not the biggest. Married.

1 is actually one of the strangest marriages I've seen and there's no issue with continued service. They're legit happy and great parents to boot. Married.

1 is toast ATM but was rocky as a quarry and really should have been over long before but did ultimately die from an ultimatum and he was left behind. Honestly no great loss to her. Not married.

The last is dying a painfully slow death and as far as I can tell every damn thing is a problem for them. Continued service seems to rank somewhere around not doing a fair share of dishes in terms of drama so I don't think we can fairly blame the hobby; I think they just don't know how to throw in the towel. Engaged sadly.

Looking at it actually the success rate is still about the same as vmy friends who met SO in more traditional settings. I know 2 who're happily married, about 6 who haven't dated a single person for more than a month within a two year span, and 2 who had long term relationships crumble in that time. So IDK relationships are hard no matter what so honestly I say go for it; better to try and fail than live a life of regrets. And looking at this I would say don't get too chummy with me because man that's a horrible success rate no matter how you slice it.

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On 11/11/2018 at 4:33 PM, goodguy69 said:

Damn if that is the case, I quess 9 in 5 days means I have a real problem then. Tide32 is right, i am a slut.🤫🤫

Sluts are under appreciated! I like to think of it as scientific studies. You love science...biology is a science...how each woman feels is different, come up with a good hypothesis and boom! No longer a slut, but a researcher! 

To the OP...you never know what can happen. Out of all the guys I’ve seen in 18 years, only one made me rethink life. Turns out, he’s the love of my life. Wasn’t looking for him, in fact I was married. We spent 10 mos talking long distance, building the most beautiful friendship...then I blew up my whole life and moved to NC to start my life over with my love. It’s going perfectly and we had a looooong talk about me and my line of work. He only cared if I’m safe. He doesn’t want details. As a former hobbyist, he realizes that I provide a service, it’s business and at the end of the day I come home to him. 

Heres the thing we discovered...people aren’t meant to be monogamous. It’s a lie and we end up getting hurt. We tell each other if we have a date. Of course I have the ability to make him forget his name so he isn’t looking for a date yet. But, when he does, I’ll be fine with it. It’s just sex!!!! 

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