Mustang87

Screening Question

39 posts in this topic

I have been screened dozens of times by ladies both on and off this site.  Most of the times I've given the information they've requested and a handful of times I've declined and moved on.  I think that is pretty common.  Then this morning this happened.  I've made an appointment for tomorrow with a lady I've seen before. All communication with her is via email.  I saw her this past summer, she screened me, we met and had a great time, I reviewed her and she gave me a reference.  I got an email from her today confirming the appointment, but then asking be to let her know the make, model, year and color of the car I will be arriving in.  My first thought was, no big deal, I've seen her before and I know she is legit.  If having that information makes her feel more comfortable, then what's the harm?  But the more I think about it, the more it is starting to bother me.  Isn't the fact that we've seen each other, and she gave me a reference, more important then any screening information I could provide at this point?  Am I being paranoid, or is there reason for concern here?  The lady is a member of this board and may see this thread.  And no, I've not yet provided the new information. 

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Provider's and Hobbyists are a quirky bunch! Lol. I love this group! Did you ask her this very same thing, so she can give you her explaination?

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A lot of ladies on this board have someone else at the keyboard managing their profile. I've encountered the same thing and that is usually the case, if they start doing things themselves, or if they get someone else to do it for them it may lead to some additional screening. It's like when I enter all my info on an automated system, then the live rep asks me repeat everything again...annoying yes, managable, also yes. 

Edited by ZHTR
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Please don’t give out that information.  I honestly cannot think of a reason it would be beneficial for “screening” purposes.  

 

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I've never requested that kind of info, but I know a lot of girls do. They want to see you pull up, and see that it is actually you in the car, especially before they have you come up. Make model and color don't seem unreasonable, considering we are giving you our EXACT location. The provider can answer this question much better than any of us though. A healthy amount of paranoia is normal. 

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16 minutes ago, Laci French said:

Please don’t give out that information.  I honestly cannot think of a reason it would be beneficial for “screening” purposes.  

 

I don't see anything wrong with her asking for this info.  She isn't asking for his plate number.  She isn't asking for his driver's license.  She simply wants to know what kind of car he will be arriving in.  Maybe she has had some strange things happen lately  (guys getting her address but then not showing up - or maybe she has a stalker she is trying to avoid)  So she wants to know what this guy will be arriving in.  Logical.  No biggie IMO.    Providers have different comfort zones; different screening methods, etc.   

Edited by Danielle Rae
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Don't overthink it. Just ask her why. (could be something as simple as unlocking a door or propping open a  door when you arrive ) to something more ominous as eliminating Someone Else showing up at her incall vs You and she is in a position to view the parking lot to see if it IS you...(as in a couple of guys sharing a profile/ email etc - ....yes..it has happened. (ugh) 

Could be any number of reasons not totally alarm-worthy at all. Ask Her. (and you say you already know she is legit and you have seen her before.so that should not be a concern..) 

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It sounds like it hasn’t been that long since the two of you have seen each other.

With all communication by email and this question being asked “by Her”, you have no way of knowing if you are actually communicating with her or someone else.

Before answering her question, ask her a question about you that only she would know the answer to and not someone pretending to be her.

Otherwise I’d suggest moving on and not scheduling.

 

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I just pulled the plug.  Your are supposed to be excited when arriving at an appointment, not nervous. I just didn't feel comfortable.  For what it is worth, I feel awful about it. I really liked her.

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There could be many reasons, some good and some perhaps just bad advice on how to screen. 😎 Or as Melinda noted burned by an asshat "loaning" his handle and references to a buddy. It happens. I would ask her, express how it made me uncomfortable, stress how would really like to see her again ...... see what she says.

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6 hours ago, Mustang87 said:

I have been screened dozens of times by ladies both on and off this site.  Most of the times I've given the information they've requested and a handful of times I've declined and moved on.  I think that is pretty common.  Then this morning this happened.  I've made an appointment for tomorrow with a lady I've seen before. All communication with her is via email.  I saw her this past summer, she screened me, we met and had a great time, I reviewed her and she gave me a reference.  I got an email from her today confirming the appointment, but then asking be to let her know the make, model, year and color of the car I will be arriving in.  My first thought was, no big deal, I've seen her before and I know she is legit.  If having that information makes her feel more comfortable, then what's the harm?  But the more I think about it, the more it is starting to bother me.  Isn't the fact that we've seen each other, and she gave me a reference, more important then any screening information I could provide at this point?  Am I being paranoid, or is there reason for concern here?  The lady is a member of this board and may see this thread.  And no, I've not yet provided the new information. 

If your spidey senses are tingling best to follow your own instincts. If it is something fishy, all this advice, no one here would have to face the consequences you would have too. 

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32 minutes ago, geecue2 said:

If your spidey senses are tingling best to follow your own instincts. If it is something fishy, all this advice, no one here would have to face the consequences you would have too. 

+1 on this.

I also find myself wondering how many of the providers who are telling you it's not a big deal, are going to pay your expenses and legal fees if it turns out to be a big deal. :confused:

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3 hours ago, mountainrider33 said:

  You're assuming that the motive is innocent. 

  It's better be safe than sorry, especially in this hobby.  

If I assumed the motive was innocent I would have said "I am sure it is harmless and no problem.  Full speed ahead"  If I assumed the motive was despicable I would have said "Whoa.  Something wrong, don't go"  I assumed nothing other than there is SOME reason for asking him for the info, and that I personally would ask her directly - why??.  I would like to think that direct communication lets me much better decide the lay of the land - good or bad. I am a big fan of communication.

Yes, absolutely agree, everyone needs to follow their own gut and it is of course better to be safe than sorry were those the only two choices.  But to be completely safe of all danger requires celibacy and I refuse that option lol. 

Lastly, all I said was "there could be many reasons".  I am not going to list them for her or anyone else to use for jacked up reasons.

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8 hours ago, Danielle Rae said:

I don't see anything wrong with her asking for this info.  She isn't asking for his plate number.  She isn't asking for his driver's license.  She simply wants to know what kind of car he will be arriving in.  Maybe she has had some strange things happen lately  (guys getting her address but then not showing up - or maybe she has a stalker she is trying to avoid)  So she wants to know what this guy will be arriving in.  Logical.  No biggie IMO.    Providers have different comfort zones; different screening methods, etc.   

Your comment reminds me of a question I have everytime I see it.  Why do people feel like they need to hide their license plate number?  What can someone do with just seeing your plate?  Like when people are selling a car and they blur the plate or put their finger in front of the plate to block it.  There are thousands of plates out there you can see everyday so I just don't understand what the paranoia is related to concealing plates. 

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I would be a little skeptical of providing that info also.  Is it being provided so people watching out for you know when you have arrived?

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2 hours ago, Bravo1 said:

Your comment reminds me of a question I have everytime I see it.  Why do people feel like they need to hide their license plate number?  What can someone do with just seeing your plate?  Like when people are selling a car and they blur the plate or put their finger in front of the plate to block it.  There are thousands of plates out there you can see everyday so I just don't understand what the paranoia is related to concealing plates. 

I’ve tried researching this topic before. I think it was a, someone did it first and then other people did it too. So people do it now only because they’ve seen other people do it. But there’s no real reason to hide it in a photo. 

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5 hours ago, boink36 said:

+1 on this.

I also find myself wondering how many of the providers who are telling you it's not a big deal, are going to pay your expenses and legal fees if it turns out to be a big deal. :confused:

 

5 hours ago, gr8owl said:

If I assumed the motive was innocent I would have said "I am sure it is harmless and no problem.  Full speed ahead"  If I assumed the motive was despicable I would have said "Whoa.  Something wrong, don't go"  I assumed nothing other than there is SOME reason for asking him for the info, and that I personally would ask her directly - why??.  I would like to think that direct communication lets me much better decide the lay of the land - good or bad. I am a big fan of communication.

Yes, absolutely agree, everyone needs to follow their own gut and it is of course better to be safe than sorry were those the only two choices.  But to be completely safe of all danger requires celibacy and I refuse that option lol. 

Lastly, all I said was "there could be many reasons".  I am not going to list them for her or anyone else to use for jacked up reasons.

I was merely saying that there could be logical reasons why she was wanting to see what type of car  he would be arriving in.  The bottom line is we are all taking "risks" in this hobby and for that reason, we all need to respect the fact that not everyone is going to have the same screening methods, comfort levels, etc. etc.  But to blatantly say "Oh absolutely not - don't give her that info because there is no good reason for her to be asking for it!" is not cool IMO.  We don't know the specifics of the situation (i.e, is he arriving at her private incall; is it a hotel; has he had trouble speaking to her directly leading him to question whether or not it is really her etc etc.) Frankly, it would seem to me that if he already knows this provider and has met with her on prior occasions - the most logical thing to do would be to communicate directly with her about it!  

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On 10/17/2018 at 1:02 PM, Laci French said:

Please don’t give out that information.  I honestly cannot think of a reason it would be beneficial for “screening” purposes.  

 

Exactly Why I have started using UBER , Train and parking half a block away if need be. Last summer a first time client took a snap shot of my plates from his Home security camera ( I parked in his driveway) and thought it funny to Send it to me with All my damn Info two days later.. 😡😡

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6 minutes ago, Chrissy said:

Exactly Why I have started using UBER , Train and parking half a block away if need be. Last summer a first time client took a snap shot of my plates from his Home security camera ( I parked in his driveway) and thought it funny to Send it to me with All my damn Info two days later.. 😡😡

What an asshat

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43 minutes ago, Chrissy said:

Exactly Why I have started using UBER , Train and parking half a block away if need be. Last summer a first time client took a snap shot of my plates from his Home security camera ( I parked in his driveway) and thought it funny to Send it to me with All my damn Info two days later.. 😡😡

 

36 minutes ago, goodguy69 said:

What an asshat

If you mean name etc. based upon running your plates, asshat is the least of the problem.  Contrary to urban legend, very few can run plates any more. Mainly LE. 

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I know of ladies who watch you drive up and check you out as you are heading to their incall. I have never had a problem but on one occasion at the end of our time together the lady stated she watched me when I arrived at the hotel. She confessed that she said that  'I sure hope that's him'.

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On 10/17/2018 at 1:02 PM, Laci French said:

Please don’t give out that information.  I honestly cannot think of a reason it would be beneficial for “screening” purposes.  

 

I agree with Lacy do not give out further information especially since you have seen her before and obviously you had a great time together.. I am curious to think why she would need that information if you are meeting her at her private residence or in a lobby. If it was due to a parking conflict she would have just simply stated that if you are driving please park here or where ever she would not need to know further information about the details of your vehicle description. 

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38 minutes ago, wglide2003 said:

I know of ladies who watch you drive up and check you out as you are heading to their incall. I have never had a problem but on one occasion at the end of our time together the lady stated she watched me when I arrived at the hotel. She confessed that she said that  'I sure hope that's him'.

Nice Bonus! She likes the glide in your stride Brother!

Edited by LightningP
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On 10/17/2018 at 0:58 PM, ZHTR said:

A lot of ladies on this board have someone else at the keyboard managing their profile. I've encountered the same thing and that is usually the case, if they start doing things themselves, or if they get someone else to do it for them it may lead to some additional screening. It's like when I enter all my info on an automated system, then the live rep asks me repeat everything again...annoying yes, managable, also yes. 

I'm sorry it really bothers me no one has addressed this. NONE of us have a secondary person managing our profiles. I manage everything myself. Having another person mange stuff takes away from the experience and cost US MONEY. Agencies may run girls, but no independent girl will allow another to be in charge of her potential earnings. 

 

If it bothered you she asked for that you could have brought it up that you've seen her and don't understand the need for additional info. Car information isn't really cause for alarm. I do respect you concern & think you choosing to pass is a very wise decision. Most of all THANK YOU SO MUCH for being WILLING to be Screened. many many thank yous and bows. lol 

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42 minutes ago, wglide2003 said:

I know of ladies who watch you drive up and check you out as you are heading to their incall. I have never had a problem but on one occasion at the end of our time together the lady stated she watched me when I arrived at the hotel. She confessed that she said that  'I sure hope that's him'.

I truly hope you took that as a compliment. I always get super excited if the client is a looker ;) like omg it's my lucky day. Kudos to you ;) 

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1 hour ago, Dani Panti said:

I'm sorry it really bothers me no one has addressed this. NONE of us have a secondary person managing our profiles. I manage everything myself. Having another person mange stuff takes away from the experience and cost US MONEY. Agencies may run girls, but no independent girl will allow another to be in charge of her potential earnings. 

 

If it bothered you she asked for that you could have brought it up that you've seen her and don't understand the need for additional info. Car information isn't really cause for alarm. I do respect you concern & think you choosing to pass is a very wise decision. Most of all THANK YOU SO MUCH for being WILLING to be Screened. many many thank yous and bows. lol 

None? how could you possibly know that?

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On 10/17/2018 at 1:28 PM, mountainrider33 said:

+1  There is zero reason to give that information, especially with someone you've seen before.  The first thing that went through my head was, only the cops would like to know which car you're pulling up in.

My thoughts too

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1 hour ago, Dani Panti said:

I'm sorry it really bothers me no one has addressed this. NONE of us have a secondary person managing our profiles. I manage everything myself. Having another person mange stuff takes away from the experience and cost US MONEY. Agencies may run girls, but no independent girl will allow another to be in charge of her potential earnings. 

 

If it bothered you she asked for that you could have brought it up that you've seen her and don't understand the need for additional info. Car information isn't really cause for alarm. I do respect you concern & think you choosing to pass is a very wise decision. Most of all THANK YOU SO MUCH for being WILLING to be Screened. many many thank yous and bows. lol 

lot's of ladies have a secondary person managing their profile.  Some ladies even have "managers".

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Lots of interesting, opposing viewpoints here.  

In general, I don't see any issue with knowing color/make/model, especially for a private incall, or hotel with exterior entrance to the room.  It's completely reasonable to me that her looking out the window for cars that pull up would be a sensible safety measure that I would understand.  In many ways, especially for a new contact, that would be better than the "send me a selfie."

Now, were you to meet at an indoor entrance or larger hotel, I see less use for that being reasonable or useful.

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