Just Another Guy

Disappointment

32 posts in this topic

Had a situation with a provider over the weekend that was disappointing. On Saturday night set up a time on Sunday to in-call meet a visiting provider (excellent reviews, with just one NCNS, for which she provided an explanatory rebuttal). The following morning, texted the provider about a half hour before our appointment time to find out where to meet. No reply. No reply 15 minutes later, or at the time of the appointment, and no replies to a couple of texts after the appointment time (maybe a previous appointment ran over?  I was trying to be flexible).  Long story short, was completely ghosted by the provider. No explanation, no apology. 

I don't want this to follow the track of some other threads here. I'm not bashing providers, or even this provider.  It was just a huge disappointment to have set a time to meet the provider and then have it all fall apart and without explanation.  And, to be fair, it's just as bad if guys do it to providers, so guys, be on your best behavior with the ladies, and be considerate of their time.

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Sorry, this happened to you. I know guys give providers a few days to see if they contact them, with an apology and explanation...hopefully she will reach out to you, and make things right with you. NCNS and last minute cancellations suck on both sides. I hope you dust yourself off, pick another lady, and try again. 😘

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Actually,you should write a NCNS review.Be interesting to see what her rebuttal excuse is. Hunter is right, NCNS sucks on both sides of this hobby.

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47 minutes ago, JRWolfe said:

Actually,you should write a NCNS review.Be interesting to see what her rebuttal excuse is. Hunter is right, NCNS sucks on both sides of this hobby.

I did, but the mods rejected it since we didn't have a meeting place set. They say it's a "time waster" but not a "NCNS". 

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Very unfortunate this happened to you.

You can’t name her in the forums as that would be outing.

As far as I’m concerned, Hunter and JR are correct and a review SHOULD be allowed to be written.

For the mods, according to Just Another Guy, a time was set and he attempted to contact her to find the location.  Many ladies don’t give a location until it almost the  appointment time.  In my opinion, this qualifies as a NCNS.

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6 minutes ago, ilovewomen said:

  Many ladies don’t give a location until it almost the  appointment time.  In my opinion, this qualifies as a NCNS.

   That has been a fact for decades. Before cell phones,gents were instructed to go to  a  specific pay phone ,about 15 minutes before an appointment, to get the exact location for fun.

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I’m sorry that happened and there is no reason a simple message cannot be sent to cancel.  

I hope you find more reliable ladies and all of your encounters moving forward are awesome!

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I fully understand the OP's Disappointment and Frustration.  This should be an NCNS review as the meeting factors had been agreed to by both parties.  To me this is more about the lack of the civil courtesy of simple communications.   I understand the life happens.  Things come up that weren't expected.  But a simple message would certainly be polite.  Even if it is "Hey my sister from the planet Zorgon just landed and I have to pick her up, can we get together later?" would at least show some class.  Sure we know it is BS but at least it would be courteous by acknowledging the situation.  Even after the fact would be the right thing to do and possibly lead to a later meeting and salvage the reputation.  I haven't been around long but have experienced the ghosting and NCNS garbage.  

Another instance of Preaching to the choir here.  The people that need to read this and think about it never will.

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1 hour ago, JRWolfe said:

   That has been a fact for decades. Before cell phones,gents were instructed to go to  a  specific pay phone ,about 15 minutes before an appointment, to get the exact location for fun.

So true.  I remember having to make 3 calls from 3 different places from a lady I contacted from the Oyster.  I should have told her no after the second call.  I should have told her no when I arrived and saw what she looked like.

Back then, we all TOFTT occasionally.

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I'm fine with not being able to post a NCNS for this.  After some reflection on this situation, that's not the best thing to do, and my goal was more to just vent a bit about being disappointed and not about causing trouble for the lady.

Thanks for the support!

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Sorry to hear this happened to you. But look on the bright side you didn’t get ripped off and you still have the available cash. That being said, sounds like it’s time for you to hit the listing section and have fun picking a new lady! I wish you the best in your search.

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3 hours ago, JRWolfe said:

   That has been a fact for decades. Before cell phones,gents were instructed to go to  a  specific pay phone ,about 15 minutes before an appointment, to get the exact location for fun.

Oh I miss those days!! Made Incall soooo much easier :)

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Same here, a couple of weeks ago I was coming from CS and saw a well reviewed provider doing in calls on DTC so I contact her and we agreed on time for meeting since I did not have a location I pulled over on Dry Creek and waited for almos 30 mins I have not hear from her up to this date. On the mean time I meet a couple of lovely ladies 😀😀😀

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I guess I'm a little confused as to why this isn't a NCNS. For a majority of my visits with new gentlemen, I don't give out my exact location until they are on their way, or in the basic area (cross streets) I have given them. That by no means suggests we don't have an actual date set. If we both have an understanding we are meeting at a specific time, and in a general location, and he goes silent 15 or 30 mins before we're suppose to meet, I consider that to be a NCNS. Am I missing something here? I feel like there is some information we're missing here. If not, I see a way for a lot of providers to get away NCNS's. 🤔

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1 hour ago, Hunter VanDyke said:

I guess I'm a little confused as to why this isn't a NCNS. For a majority of my visits with new gentlemen, I don't give out my exact location until they are on their way, or in the basic area (cross streets) I have given them. That by no means suggests we don't have an actual date set. If we both have an understanding we are meeting at a specific time, and in a general location, and he goes silent 15 or 30 mins before we're suppose to meet, I consider that to be a NCNS. Am I missing something here? I feel like there is some information we're missing here. If not, I see a way for a lot of providers to get away NCNS's. 🤔

I agree with you that this should be an NCNS, but the mod's disagree.  If the shoe was on the other foot and we made the appointment, and I never contacted her for the location, and we failed to meet, that would be an NCNS on my part.

I referred back to the text messages when I made the original post so I could make sure I had the timeline correct. 

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And if it was me...WE ALL KNOW THE REVIEW WOULD BE POSTED IMMEDIATELY!! It sucks to see other's get away with so much these days!!

To the OP sorry your time was wasted!!

 

 

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This really sucks when it happens especially if you don't have a plan B in place.  I had two providers flake this weekend.  One we set the date but I could not commit to the exact time till the morning of. I can not see that at a NCNS but she just ghosted me.  Luckily some one was available and I had a great time.  Another provider happen to show in the listing texted and she responded promptly a couple of times the stopped to find out she fell asleep.  No worries! An hour or so later she texted back lets meet but when I responded for an address and exact time she just flat out ghosted me.  Saw her listing pop up several hours later. I just don't know why some of these YL do this.  Again no worries I will find someone who will want to spend time with me later this week.  It seems to happen more when I set up dates in advance instead of short notice.  The good thing there are lots of great women on this board and while it is a bummer being let down you can find someone that really wants to see you. 

Happy and safe hobbying

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15 hours ago, JRWolfe said:

Actually,you should write a NCNS review.Be interesting to see what her rebuttal excuse is. Hunter is right, NCNS sucks on both sides of this hobby.

+1. 

One of the board's primary purposes is to help people make smarter safer choices.  This information is very helpful.  

My recommendation based on historical data:  Give it 24-48 hours in case she reaches out to you with a valid explanation and a reschedule opportunity.  Then no harm no foul, and write a review of your time together.  We are all human and life does happen...

If your still hearing crickets after that 24-48 hours, a NC/NS review is a very insightful piece of info...

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10 hours ago, JRWolfe said:

   That has been a fact for decades. Before cell phones,gents were instructed to go to  a  specific pay phone ,about 15 minutes before an appointment, to get the exact location for fun.

I remember those days.  Should have known I was hooked on this hobby when I knew where certain pay phones were located in a certain part of (a different) city.  So when asked to call from the pay phone on the corner of "x" and "y", I would say, "Oh, you mean the phone near the parking lot at "Z" store."  

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6 hours ago, SabrinaLynn aka KatieCreme said:

And if it was me...WE ALL KNOW THE REVIEW WOULD BE POSTED IMMEDIATELY!! It sucks to see other's get away with so much these days!!

To the OP sorry your time was wasted!!

 

 

Having read that other thread, IF it were you, I would give you wide latitude and the benefit of the doubt. 

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9 hours ago, Hunter VanDyke said:

If we both have an understanding we are meeting at a specific time, and in a general location, and he goes silent 15 or 30 mins before we're suppose to meet, I consider that to be a NCNS.

  BEFORE you're supposed to meet ??   Hey, some people do not like to talk on the phone while driving to a location. Now if he remains silent 15 or 30 minutes AFTER the time you are supposed to meet...that would be a NCNS.

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On 9/10/2018 at 9:57 PM, Just Another Guy said:

Had a situation with a provider over the weekend that was disappointing. On Saturday night set up a time on Sunday to in-call meet a visiting provider (excellent reviews, with just one NCNS, for which she provided an explanatory rebuttal). The following morning, texted the provider about a half hour before our appointment time to find out where to meet. No reply. No reply 15 minutes later, or at the time of the appointment, and no replies to a couple of texts after the appointment time (maybe a previous appointment ran over?  I was trying to be flexible).  Long story short, was completely ghosted by the provider. No explanation, no apology. 

I don't want this to follow the track of some other threads here. I'm not bashing providers, or even this provider.  It was just a huge disappointment to have set a time to meet the provider and then have it all fall apart and without explanation.  And, to be fair, it's just as bad if guys do it to providers, so guys, be on your best behavior with the ladies, and be considerate of their time.

Sadly this is a growing trend in the industry. Chat up, flirt and then disappear. So frustrating. 

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On 9/10/2018 at 9:57 PM, Just Another Guy said:

Had a situation with a provider over the weekend that was disappointing. On Saturday night set up a time on Sunday to in-call meet a visiting provider (excellent reviews, with just one NCNS, for which she provided an explanatory rebuttal). The following morning, texted the provider about a half hour before our appointment time to find out where to meet. No reply. No reply 15 minutes later, or at the time of the appointment, and no replies to a couple of texts after the appointment time (maybe a previous appointment ran over?  I was trying to be flexible).  Long story short, was completely ghosted by the provider. No explanation, no apology. 

I don't want this to follow the track of some other threads here. I'm not bashing providers, or even this provider.  It was just a huge disappointment to have set a time to meet the provider and then have it all fall apart and without explanation.  And, to be fair, it's just as bad if guys do it to providers, so guys, be on your best behavior with the ladies, and be considerate of their time.

JAG I am sorry for your disappointment, it does suck when that happens and believe me, some of us have been there before. I can see why the MODS didn't approve your request. Technically, there was no CONFIRMATION from what it looks like to me. Maybe she over slept, had some type of emergency or was too tipsy/high to remember. I do agree that a PROFESSIONAL should have given you an EXPLANATION but as you can see, PROFESSIONALISM is not always what you get in this BUSINESS. I am not trying to be funny but at least you didn't spend time/money going to the location and being GHOSTED or sitting in the parking lot. For me, I hate to write NEGATIVE REVIEWS, so if a lady gets one from me, 9 times out of 10 she is going to get one from someone else as well. Hopefully, she reads the forum and reaches out to you, if not, the best way to get over this slight disappointment is to IMMEDIATELY LOL go see a REGULAR or someone brand new..........

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6 hours ago, Savoir Faire said:

... Hopefully, she reads the forum and reaches out to you, ..........

More likely to change her name & post a new listing. 😟

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6 hours ago, Savoir Faire said:

Technically, there was no CONFIRMATION from what it looks like to me. 

I disagree...everything was confirmed except the location (and I understand why that's a last minute detail). I agree that there may have been some unforeseen circumstances, but as you said a PROFESSIONAL would've reached out by now.

I've moved on and life is good...  :)

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Late to the thread here, but with most of the ladies I have contacted ahead of time (I prefer at least a day or two out) I have NO appointment unless and until I confirm the morning of and she responds to similarly confirm.  In other words, no appointment, no NCNS, no review.  Now if she confirms and gives a general location and then ghosts you before giving address ..... yep, review.  JMHO

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6 minutes ago, gr8owl said:

Late to the thread here, but with most of the ladies I have contacted ahead of time (I prefer at least a day or two out) I have NO appointment unless and until I confirm the morning of and she responds to similarly confirm.  In other words, no appointment, no NCNS, no review.  Now if she confirms and gives a general location and then ghosts you before giving address ..... yep, review.  JMHO

It appears I'm on the outside of the norm yet again. Although a morning confirmation on both sides is nice, it is not required for me. I book appts weeks in advance sometimes,  and if we have an appt set, it's set as far as I'm concerned, unless one of us cancels or reschedules.  Thank you for clarifying why this wasn't a NCNS for a review. I didnt know a morning confirmation was required. 

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4 minutes ago, Hunter VanDyke said:

It appears I'm on the outside of the norm yet again. Although a morning confirmation on both sides is nice, it is not required for me. I book appts weeks in advance sometimes,  and if we have an appt set, it's set as far as I'm concerned, unless one of us cancels or reschedules.  Thank you for clarifying why this wasn't a NCNS for a review. I didnt know a morning confirmation was required. 

I do not know if there is a "norm".  Whatever works for you is your ideal!  I was just relating what I am used to, and that I always confirm the morning of.  Works well for me. ;)

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