Infatuation…

[Laci French]

27 minutes ago, lintlizard said:

This rings so true for me.  For me there is something painful about being alone - I mean REALLY SOLO in life, and I find myself resorting to this "transaction" all too often to avoid that discomfort.  The sad part for me is when I know in my heart that someone I desire won't give me the time of day unless I pay them to.... 

I'm genuinely curious about the ladies' motivations - sure there's the obvious money factor, but what's underneath that...?  What is it that makes you open up for any guy with money?  Are you looking for a momentary connection?  Do you feel loneliness at the end of the day...?

That’s when we phone a friend and have selfish sex😂

[Femboy286510]

I also feel that some guys can get confused becsuse like I said some of them are really good actors and don't realize the nice, sweet, girl impression they are getting could all just be an act. I had no idea the lady I first saw as a provider, the sweet innocent girl I thought (looks can be deceiving) actually would have turned out to have anger issues and be the first person to ever punch me in my face! (In a non-kinky way lol)

Edited July 1, 2018 by Femboy286510

[Guest]

25 minutes ago, lintlizard said:

I'm genuinely curious about the ladies' motivations - sure there's the obvious money factor, but what's underneath that...?  What is it that makes you open up for any guy with money?  Are you looking for a momentary connection?  Do you feel loneliness at the end of the day...?

 

 

19 hours ago, fishndude57 said:

…mostly I think for us dudes. Can it happen? Has it happened to you? I know for a fact it has to me. How do we handle it? I mean this is an atmosphere where we’re able to gain satisfaction, but how is that defined? For me at least, it cannot just be a physical thing. For 2Big…who cares. But if I cannot have at least a thought process, why fuckin bother. I’ve fallen hard for 2x now. One I stay in touch with, one who cares. I’m learning how to control, not my emotions, but my thought process. We are all people, we are all people, it can be hard, because there can be sincere exchanges over time between all. Does there have to be a deviation, or can we remain friends. I’m gonna wish the latter. I so want it to be the latter…or was it all just a fuckin waste of time. Personally, I put a lot of energy into this, so I really hope not…Peace

 

I have met some of the most beautiful ladies on here! I know I have Rep, for being the TOFTT guy! I do really try to relate to all  the ladies on a personal level. Sometimes, my most enjoyable visits are with those that I have a good discussion with, before and/or after a visit.  The thing is, there are several ladies I absolutely LOVE! I've told them so! They've told me so too! Not like a LOVE I would pursue beyond this hobby. Especially because of age differences!  But one in particular, I am literally in love with! But age! AND she has told me she loves me! I've seen her twice! So she's not playing me! I don't support her or fund her in anyway! But if she lived closer, DAYUM! That would be interesting!

I know it happens! There are some outstanding Ladies and Gentlemen  here! How could it not happen! 

AND there are the ladies that KNOW what you want to hear. So you'll keep coming back. Done there Been that!

What guys have to do is recognize the difference! If she texts, messages you just to say hello, to keep in touch,and maybe asks your advice on something, yeah she likes you and respects your advice! But LOVE? Maybe, Maybe not. Can a client/provider affair last? Can you live with HER seeing other clients? Can she live with you seeing other providers!

I'll tell you! Some providers, I've seen once, I sill like them as friends. I might not ever see them again as a provider.

I try to keep things separate. It can be hard! Keep perspective! If you fall in love that would be so beautiful! If not, realize who you both are! But stay friends!

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

13 hours ago, 2Big said:

Nope. Never. It's a paid transaction, and once the services have been rendered, thanks, and close the door on your way out. 

Think about it: you're "infatuated" by a girl who runs around with stale lube in her snatch, driving a car from appointment to appointment littered with McD's French Fries wrappers.

Defiantly not Keto friendly. However I am sure gets love

[Cecilia]

6 hours ago, jj254-1 said:

I'm in the hobby because I honestly don't want what comes along with a relationship. I enjoy time alone. I enjoy the freedom to come and go as I please, with not obligations to other people. I don't want to explain why I took off for a few days, or worse, get permission for it. People get clingy and jealous in 'real world' relationships. A provider doesn't expect me to call her before I go to bed after we've met a few times. 

 

This is me to a tee. I am too free-spirited to answer to another adult for my actions and choices.

[jj254-1]

55 minutes ago, Cecilia said:

This is me to a tee. I am too free-spirited to answer to another adult for my actions and choices.

To quote Friends via the wonderful Lacy French: You're my lobster. 

[adventurous14]

In my limited view, infatuation isn’t much different from addiction. Not ultimately helpful to either parties involved... 

[Audrey Astor]

7 hours ago, lintlizard said:

I'm genuinely curious about the ladies' motivations - sure there's the obvious money factor, but what's underneath that...?  What is it that makes you open up for any guy with money?  Are you looking for a momentary connection?  Do you feel loneliness at the end of the day...?

I don't know if this is snarky or genuine... Of course some of us get lonely. We're human. I'm not sure where you reside, but I am in Denver. $100k a year only allows for a modest living, nothing extravagant or fancy. Most of us don't have husbands bringing home a 6 figure salary, so yes part of it is money. The other aspect is that most of us are "caretakers", we enjoy what we do, which is not just physical, but we play many roles (psychologist, friend, lover, confidant). Another factor for me is that I want to live my life. I don't want to work 12 hour days for the man. I want to be with my family and friends. If I feel like taking the day off, I do. If I'm sick, I don't feel guilty. This job has allowed me to care for ailing family, to attend school functions, to have friendly dinners and outings with lonely clients, to participate in many fun adventures where I can actually be present in the moment. 

[Cecilia]

1 hour ago, jj254-1 said:

To quote Friends via the wonderful Lacy French: You're my lobster. 

Aww, I love Friends, and Laci too.

I'll be your lobster!  -  "You can actually see old lobster couples, walking around their tank, you know, holding claws."

[Skylighter]

22 hours ago, 2Big said:

Nope. Never. It's a paid transaction, and once the services have been rendered, thanks, and close the door on your way out. 

Think about it: you're "infatuated" by a girl who runs around with stale lube in her snatch, driving a car from appointment to appointment littered with McD's French Fries wrappers.

How do YOU, know it's stale ?

And, if it is, you should probably up your standards    

[Guest]

9 hours ago, Audrey Astor said:

I don't know if this is snarky or genuine... Of course some of us get lonely. We're human. I'm not sure where you reside, but I am in Denver. $100k a year only allows for a modest living, nothing extravagant or fancy. Most of us don't have husbands bringing home a 6 figure salary, so yes part of it is money. The other aspect is that most of us are "caretakers", we enjoy what we do, which is not just physical, but we play many roles (psychologist, friend, lover, confidant). Another factor for me is that I want to live my life. I don't want to work 12 hour days for the man. I want to be with my family and friends. If I feel like taking the day off, I do. If I'm sick, I don't feel guilty. This job has allowed me to care for ailing family, to attend school functions, to have friendly dinners and outings with lonely clients, to participate in many fun adventures where I can actually be present in the moment. 

You bring up such a very good point Miss Audrey . And that is that providers are only human too. And as such, are subject to the same feelings and emotions as anyone else. So I know there are some providers that genuinely care for some of their clients. Just because they are in the profession they are in doesn’t mean they are incapable of feeling love, friendship, loneliness and happiness and all the other feelings too. I do know some of these providers would rather have a traditional profession. Some not. Some have chemical problems and this supports that for them. I believe some providers pretend to care for a gentleman so he’ll keep coming back. It’s all part of the fantasy. 

[lintlizard]

9 hours ago, Audrey Astor said:

I don't know if this is snarky or genuine...

I am totally sincere.  I'm truly curious what the motivations are that drive men to pay for, and women to accept money for the most intimate connection that people can have....

Thanks for your response Audrey.

Edited July 2, 2018 by lintlizard
unnecessary proposition

[Femboy286510]

5 hours ago, lintlizard said:

I am totally sincere.  I'm truly curious what the motivations are that drive men to pay for, and women to accept money for the most intimate connection that people can have....

Thanks for your response Audrey.

That’s not easy to answer. Everybody has their own circumstances that brings them to where they are in life. I’m sure for most it’s money, it’s a job. It’s not always an intimate connection, that only happens if it’s genuine. Otherwise it’s just a service. Money I’m sure is the biggest factor. Majority of the women in this biz prob don’t have a higher education so what else do you expect them to do? Work for $12/hr? I’m sure many have kids, how else can they afford to support themselves and live a reasonable lifestyle? There aren’t many other options, that can bring you this kind of fast money. 

Edited July 2, 2018 by Femboy286510

[eatu55]

3 minutes ago, Femboy286510 said:

That’s not easy to answer. Everybody has their own circumstances that brings them to where they are in life. I’m sure for most it’s money, it’s a job. It’s not always an intimate connection, that only happens if it’s genuine. Otherwise it’s just a service. Money I’m sure is the biggest factor. Majority of the women in this biz prob don’t have a higher education so what else do you expect them to do? Work for $12/hr? I’m sure many have kids, how else can they afford to support themselves and live a reasonable lifestyle? There aren’t many other options, that can bring you this kind of fast money. 

^^THAT^^ is a horrible generalization and the exact opposite of what I have experienced. I don't have hundreds of data points, but more than 10 and a significant majority are highly educated. Honestly, most of the providers I know are doing multiple things and are low volume. They are not living hand to mouth as you suggest.

[Femboy286510]

2 minutes ago, eatu55 said:

^^THAT^^ is a horrible generalization and the exact opposite of what I have experienced. I don't have hundreds of data points, but more than 10 and a significant majority are highly educated. Honestly, most of the providers I know are doing multiple things and are low volume. They are not living hand to mouth as you suggest.

By higher education you mean, “college graduated” ? You’re saying in your experience majority of the women you have seen are college graduated and have degrees? That’s what I meant by higher education. 

[eatu55]

Exactly. More than a few with multiple advanced degrees.

[Femboy286510]

7 minutes ago, eatu55 said:

^^THAT^^ is a horrible generalization and the exact opposite of what I have experienced. I don't have hundreds of data points, but more than 10 and a significant majority are highly educated. Honestly, most of the providers I know are doing multiple things and are low volume. They are not living hand to mouth as you suggest.

Highly educated? Or college graduated? I’m talking about a degree. Not just being highly educated in general. 

I never said anybody was living hand to mouth. My point was most prob don’t have a college degree so they would likely not qualify for more than an entry level paid job. Ie: without a college degree it would be difficult to find a $100k salary job therefore turning to this profession in order to be able to make the same quick money without a college degree. 

[eatu55]

15 minutes ago, Femboy286510 said:

That’s not easy to answer. Everybody has their own circumstances that brings them to where they are in life. I’m sure for most it’s money, it’s a job. It’s not always an intimate connection, that only happens if it’s genuine. Otherwise it’s just a service. Money I’m sure is the biggest factor. Majority of the women in this biz prob don’t have a higher education so what else do you expect them to do? Work for $12/hr? I’m sure many have kids, how else can they afford to support themselves and live a reasonable lifestyle? There aren’t many other options, that can bring you this kind of fast money. 

You should probably stick to what motivates you in your circumstances rather than projecting some mythology onto the ladies.

[Femboy286510]

3 minutes ago, eatu55 said:

You should probably stick to what motivates you in your circumstances rather than projecting some mythology onto the ladies.

Sorry if I upset you 

[Femboy286510]

6 minutes ago, eatu55 said:

Exactly. More than a few with multiple advanced degrees.

Hey that’s awesome then. I’ll admit when I’m wrong. 

[eatu55]

11 minutes ago, Femboy286510 said:

Hey that’s awesome then. I’ll admit when I’m wrong. 

Thanks. I probably have a bit of a thin skin on the topic of categorizing people and assuming their motives. Gotta at least see their shoes before you can walk a mile in them.

[Femboy286510]

11 minutes ago, eatu55 said:

Gotta at least see their shoes before you can walk a mile in them.

I’m only going by my own personal experience. I married a provider. I know what goes on behind the scenes more than your average client. I have met many of my ex-wife’s provider friends. I’m sorry to say none of them had bio chem degrees. 

Apparently you know all the providers with PhDs. My experience was different. My intention wasn’t to generalize or categorize and apologize if I did. My point was trying to answer the question “what motivates women in this hobby” You decided to cherry pick a statement and turn it against me. I even said PROB (probably) I wasn’t even making it out to be a concrete statement. Sounds like you’re taking it personally. I’m sure the ladies will do just fine without you having to swoop in and “white knight” to their defense. 

Edited July 2, 2018 by Femboy286510

[eatu55]

Clearly we share different experiences. Kinda proves my point.

You are correct the ladies will do just fine without any of us (individually). There has always been and always will be a huge diversity in the provider and client communities so generalizations beyond, "money is exchanged," are fruitless speculation.

[Violet Lovely]

14 minutes ago, Femboy286510 said:

I’m only going by my own personal experience. I married a provider. I know what goes on behind the scenes more than your average client. I have met many of my ex-wife’s provider friends. I’m sorry to say none of them had bio chem degrees. 

Apparently you know all the providers with PhDs. My experience was different. My intention wasn’t to generalize or categorize and apologize if I did. My point was trying to answer the question “what motivates women in this hobby” You decided to cherry pick a statement and turn it against me. I even said PROB (probably) I wasn’t even making it out to be a concrete statement. Sounds like you’re taking it personally. I’m sure the ladies will do just fine without you having to swoop in and “white knight” to their defense. 

Well, you f***ing did. And I hope more women see how you've put our your true colors out here after being here for just 3 days. Gooooood f***ing luck! I mean that insincerely, don't bother responding.

 

Heed or don't: sit back and STFU and learn before getting back to the keyboard.

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

59 minutes ago, Femboy286510 said:

That’s not easy to answer. Everybody has their own circumstances that brings them to where they are in life. I’m sure for most it’s money, it’s a job. It’s not always an intimate connection, that only happens if it’s genuine. Otherwise it’s just a service. Money I’m sure is the biggest factor. Majority of the women in this biz prob don’t have a higher education so what else do you expect them to do? Work for $12/hr? I’m sure many have kids, how else can they afford to support themselves and live a reasonable lifestyle? There aren’t many other options, that can bring you this kind of fast money. 

i have a BA as well as training and education in many forms of Eastern Arts. As for my lady friends? Many of them are highly educated and it really bothers me that someone from out of no place could say that the ladies are this or that! You are in no position to make any sort of statement! Honestly, I don’t have anymore wall coverage to hang more of my documents. Obviously you know nothing about us incredibly smart and beautiful ladies that all in one way or another are very educated! 

[Laci French]

27 minutes ago, Femboy286510 said:

I’m only going by my own personal experience. I married a provider. I know what goes on behind the scenes more than your average client. I have met many of my ex-wife’s provider friends. I’m sorry to say none of them had bio chem degrees. 

Apparently you know all the providers with PhDs. My experience was different. My intention wasn’t to generalize or categorize and apologize if I did. My point was trying to answer the question “what motivates women in this hobby” You decided to cherry pick a statement and turn it against me. I even said PROB (probably) I wasn’t even making it out to be a concrete statement. Sounds like you’re taking it personally. I’m sure the ladies will do just fine without you having to swoop in and “white knight” to their defense. 

I don’t think he was white knighting to our defense,  simply him being a REAL MAN, a gentleman.  

 

[fishndude57]

Femboy, once again I create a thread that has some positive feedback, why the fuck you gotta fuck it up. So tired of fanboy's Jeez!

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

4 minutes ago, fishndude57 said:

Femboy, once again I create a thread that has some positive feedback, why the fuck you gotta fuck it up. So tired of fanboy's Jeez!

I thought

the very same thing too Fishndude57

why must this guy come on TOB and work on mudding the waters? We all have been through enough already! Please stop with the insults Femboy. You need to find another hobby please. 

 

Edited July 2, 2018 by Kali Sensual Reiki

[Laci French]

Someone, somewhere needs to change their panties because I’m smelling jaded asshole. 

[ilovewomen]

On 7/1/2018 at 3:43 AM, 2Big said:

Nope. Never. It's a paid transaction, and once the services have been rendered, thanks, and close the door on your way out. 

Think about it: you're "infatuated" by a girl who runs around with stale lube in her snatch, driving a car from appointment to appointment littered with McD's French Fries wrappers.

Leave it to 2Big to bring a touch of class to the forums....Not