CallieVane

A Screening Conundrum

75 posts in this topic

I live about 1/2 of the year in the US and 1/2 of the year in a country where the hobby is not illegal, or at least, nobody is afraid of LE. Man! what a blessing! LOL

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 6/12/2018 at 5:06 PM, CallieVane said:

Within the past few days I've noticed an odd trend of gentleman refusing to screen until I produce them with a list of rates and or services. The issue is I don't provide those until said gentleman have passed screening, that way I'm able to open more about myself. To the beautiful providers of this amazing site, how would you handle this situation? To the gentleman of this wonderful site, am I being unreasonable? I'm usually met with complete vitriol from the gentleman's part when this happens that results in me having to block them. Any help on this subject would be appreciated. Thank you! :) 

It's about safety and if they refuse to answer screening questions, move on. Sadly this seems to happen more and more right now and it's hard to understand why so many ignore screening and focus on their demands. 

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
31 minutes ago, Zelda Runner said:

It's about safety and if they refuse to answer screening questions, move on. Sadly this seems to happen more and more right now and it's hard to understand why so many ignore screening and focus on their demands. 

I don't get it. Why would a gentleman want to be with a lady who doesn't feel safe and secure with him? 

2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, eatu55 said:

I don't get it. Why would a gentleman want to be with a lady who doesn't feel safe and secure with him? 

Great question but some of the requests that come through ignore screening questions and just make requests. Red flag for sure. It's all about trust, safety and comfort for a stellar, fun time! 

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, eatu55 said:

I don't get it. Why would a gentleman want to be with a lady who doesn't feel safe and secure with him? 

I'm with you on this one.  For the encounter to be fun for me, both parties have to feel safe.  Unless it's a 3-some, then all 3 parties have to feel safe.  ;)

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 6/12/2018 at 9:05 PM, JoDoe27 said:

 

So really if anyone were to actively read this board and take any advice you’ll overwhelmingly seeing “don’t give out personal info” more than anything else. Which, again, should anyone actively read and heed could cause problems when it comes to screening. 

 

So, this is a real problem. It’s been many years since I’ve seen a provider.  Without P411 it’s a bigger issue.  Does anyone, providers or clients, have some guidelines about how a provider can feel safe taking a client without giving out personal info?

I have a provider that is asking for either my TOB profile with references (I have no references at this time). Otherwise I need to provide her with a linked in profile, a work ID or other ID.  

I’d rather not give out my personal info. Any one have any suggestions on how a provider can now screen a client comfortably without personal details?

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
21 hours ago, wun2play said:

So, this is a real problem. It’s been many years since I’ve seen a provider.  Without P411 it’s a bigger issue.  Does anyone, providers or clients, have some guidelines about how a provider can feel safe taking a client without giving out personal info?

I have a provider that is asking for either my TOB profile with references (I have no references at this time). Otherwise I need to provide her with a linked in profile, a work ID or other ID.  

I’d rather not give out my personal info. Any one have any suggestions on how a provider can now screen a client comfortably without personal details?

You'll have to look into newbie friendly providers.  They will most likely want to talk on the phone with you for a bit, or something like that.  All in all, its a matter of risk.  Your risk and theirs.  By refusing to give out personal info, you are pushing all the risk on her. 

Here's the thing to think about though:  CEOs, lawyers, politicians, clergy, they all agree to screening at some point.  So how do you manage your side of the risk?  If you agree to screening, make it with someone well reviewed and respected.  They get that way by their discretion.  When they get your screening info, for example LinkedIn, they're not going to be your buddy on it.  They check to make sure that you have a profile with history, that isn't brand new (like a cop sting would be).  Other screening might be just sending an email from your work email address.  All they care about is making sure you're not LEO or someone who might have been featured on Unsolved Murders.

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
17 hours ago, FuriousWeasel said:

how do you manage your side of the risk?  If you agree to screening, make it with someone well reviewed and respected.  They get that way by their discretion.  When they get your screening info, for example LinkedIn, they're not going to be your buddy on it.  They check to make sure that you have a profile with history, that isn't brand new (like a cop sting would be).  

That’s good advice there, thanks.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have a question regarding this general thread (please be kind, I am a somewhat newbie):  As most of my gentlemen friends are more mature, the majority are married, recently divorced/widowed, etc. and new to being a hobbyist.  For them to give out any information whatsoever, other than their name, makes them shy away.  If they have never reached out to a provider before they are anxious about it.  As older gentlemen that are secure and many are very successful, it is a tough time getting just a little info from them.

 I had a conversation about this a few weeks back, but am still struggling with how to obtain information if they are older and new.  There are not a lot of mature providers, and they normally don't want to see someone 30 years younger then they are.   Just curious on how this is handled on any level.

 Any help would be appreciated.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
18 minutes ago, Nina Faulkner said:

I have a question regarding this general thread (please be kind, I am a somewhat newbie):  As most of my gentlemen friends are more mature, the majority are married, recently divorced/widowed, etc. and new to being a hobbyist.  For them to give out any information whatsoever, other than their name, makes them shy away.  If they have never reached out to a provider before they are anxious about it.  As older gentlemen that are secure and many are very successful, it is a tough time getting just a little info from them.

 I had a conversation about this a few weeks back, but am still struggling with how to obtain information if they are older and new.  There are not a lot of mature providers, and they normally don't want to see someone 30 years younger then they are.   Just curious on how this is handled on any level.

 Any help would be appreciated.

Hi beautiful!  Great to see you posting on the board. 

My advice is since you are new to this that you do not see newbies.  Only see gentlemen with references from reputable ladies. 

The risks are high for newbie friendly ladies and the ones that are successful have been in the business a long time. 

Take care, stay safe and prosper!

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
20 hours ago, FuriousWeasel said:

You'll have to look into newbie friendly providers.  They will most likely want to talk on the phone with you for a bit, or something like that.  All in all, its a matter of risk.  Your risk and theirs.  By refusing to give out personal info, you are pushing all the risk on her. 

Here's the thing to think about though:  CEOs, lawyers, politicians, clergy, they all agree to screening at some point.  So how do you manage your side of the risk?  If you agree to screening, make it with someone well reviewed and respected.  They get that way by their discretion.  When they get your screening info, for example LinkedIn, they're not going to be your buddy on it.  They check to make sure that you have a profile with history, that isn't brand new (like a cop sting would be).  Other screening might be just sending an email from your work email address.  All they care about is making sure you're not LEO or someone who might have been featured on Unsolved Murders.

While all of the above can be done and still be a sting, the work email is a great way (and one I didn't think about) to screen.  Although these can also be forged, it at least gives a starting point I think.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, Nina Faulkner said:

While all of the above can be done and still be a sting, the work email is a great way (and one I didn't think about) to screen.  Although these can also be forged, it at least gives a starting point I think.

One thing to remember about the police is, they're not going to put more effort than is needed.  They're not going to go through a ton of work to forge emails/social media history, when they could just put an ad out with some hot girls pictures on it and get 20 guys.  Or just act like a client and call 15 girls to see if they can get a no-screen outcall to a hotel room by the airport.  It's relatively not much work and then they get to say to the media:

"Woo hoo we got 35 arrests in a sex trafficking sting."

<lots of fluff in a press release then way down at the bottom:>

"None of those arrested are actual traffickers or victims."

 

Anyway, yeah, work email works well.  The guy just needs to send something from jim@abc-company.com to you saying something innocuous.  When you get the email to your gmail for example, it will do spam checks to make sure the mail did originate on the abc-company.com mail servers and aren't forged.

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, Nina Faulkner said:

I have a question regarding this general thread (please be kind, I am a somewhat newbie):  As most of my gentlemen friends are more mature, the majority are married, recently divorced/widowed, etc. and new to being a hobbyist.  For them to give out any information whatsoever, other than their name, makes them shy away.  If they have never reached out to a provider before they are anxious about it.  As older gentlemen that are secure and many are very successful, it is a tough time getting just a little info from them.

 I had a conversation about this a few weeks back, but am still struggling with how to obtain information if they are older and new.  There are not a lot of mature providers, and they normally don't want to see someone 30 years younger then they are.   Just curious on how this is handled on any level.

 Any help would be appreciated.

Have them come to a forum such as here, and just read for a while.  Spend a week or two.  They'll learn more about everything, get viewpoints on things, learn lingo, all that.  Then tell them to not be afraid to ask a few questions.  Have them PM some of us to ask questions they might not feel comfortable asking.

People get comfortable with things through education.  Coming to a site like this and learning is a good education.  Many of us here are in the same role in life as they are, and we've learned.

2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
22 minutes ago, FuriousWeasel said:

Have them come to a forum such as here, and just read for a while.  Spend a week or two.  They'll learn more about everything, get viewpoints on things, learn lingo, all that.  Then tell them to not be afraid to ask a few questions.  Have them PM some of us to ask questions they might not feel comfortable asking.

People get comfortable with things through education.  Coming to a site like this and learning is a good education.  Many of us here are in the same role in life as they are, and we've learned.

This really is fantastic advice. 

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, FuriousWeasel said:

Have them come to a forum such as here, and just read for a while.  Spend a week or two.  They'll learn more about everything, get viewpoints on things, learn lingo, all that.  Then tell them to not be afraid to ask a few questions.  Have them PM some of us to ask questions they might not feel comfortable asking.

People get comfortable with things through education.  Coming to a site like this and learning is a good education.  Many of us here are in the same role in life as they are, and we've learned.

I'm pretty sure some of us are in the age range that Nina prefers and some were new fairly recently. You can tell who's who, pretty easily watching the regular traffic. I agree with FW, that most of us a probably pretty approachable. 

I've had a few unsolicited PMs in the past couple weeks. I hope I gave useful information. Understand that some of us do have day jobs and though it may seem like we live here, circumstances can make getting back seem slow. It's definitely not like IMing a buddy you've known for years, but it shouldn't be scary.

Hobby on!

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now