Bora Bora

Wise words for the average guy!

24 posts in this topic

Probably this idea has already been mentioned here, but I just remembered that some time ago I was talking with a lady about the physical appearance and sexual performance of her clients. 

She said something like this:

"A client have to remember that a provider most probably has met with men that are:  (choose) uglier or fatter or with a smaller penis or worse in bed than him, BUT... most probably she also has seen men much more handsome or athletic or better endowed or better in bed... than him"

Wise words for the average guys in any of the above mentioned characteristics!!

Edited by Bora Bora
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LOL WTF you trying to make me feel bad for. You talk to my latest date or what? 

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Interesting you bring this up BB, similar thoughts run through my head from time to time when enjoying some company. 

I'm curious to know if similar thoughts/conversation have ruined someone's date right in the middle of the action?

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28 minutes ago, BallR said:

Interesting you bring this up BB, similar thoughts run through my head from time to time when enjoying some company. 

I'm curious to know if similar thoughts/conversation have ruined someone's date right in the middle of the action?

It occurs to me that many of the gentlemen here cause unnecessary problems for themselves by engaging in a certain inappropriate activity:

Thinking.

You guys think too damned much - half the time I am imagining the guys constructing spreadsheets to analyze the encounters and their expectations.  Dudes, this is an adrenaline sport, you should stop thinking and let the little guy drive for a change.

The absolute last things I am thinking about by the time we hit the sheets include:

- What she thinks of other guys, and how I compare (who gives a shit?)

- Whether she is a few years older than her photos (is she naked?  If so, who gives a shit how old she is ?)

- How much I paid for time and companionship.

- What list of acronyms some other guy was able to "achieve."

- The fact that I can't read any reviews on her.

What I am thinking about by the time we hit the sheets:

- How she smells, tastes, feels, tastes, sounds, tastes, kisses, tastes .....

- What seems to be working in the foreplay department.

- What she seems to want to try in the foreplay department.

- Is the little guy ready for full-on action yet?

Etc.

Now it may seem to you that I am simply a slutty moron who simply surrenders himself to the moment and gets completely absorbed in the flow of the bodies without any meaningful thoughts or preconceived expectations of what might happen.

You would be correct.

But, I am an extremely happy and satisfied  slutty moron who on hundreds of wonderful occasions has simply surrendered himself to the moment and gets completely absorbed in the flow of the bodies without any meaningful thoughts or preconceived expectations of what might happen.

If you are not happy in the sport, you might try stopping with all the thinking (after you have completed the extremely thorough and thoughtful screening, of course).

If you are already happy and satisfied - "nevermind."

 

Edited by BadBoy
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35 minutes ago, Audrey Astor said:

Most of those things don’t matter to us. I’d rather see a chubby guy with a fun attitude that loves to kiss than a hot guy with a crappy attitude who can’t be pleased.:P:P:P

That is so good to hear.  I do believe I would be at the top of your list.......:):):);)

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36 minutes ago, Audrey Astor said:

 I’d rather see a chubby guy with a fun attitude that loves to kiss than a hot guy with a crappy attitude who can’t be pleased.

This.

I have always gone into an appointment with a new for me lady with the attitude of go with the flow, have fun. Lady nice to me, I will reciprocate, as I know I'm not god's gift. Guy will score more brownie points being a polite nice guy vs trying to be be end all and or PIA. Lady more relaxed around you, more fun.

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1 hour ago, Audrey Astor said:

Most of those things don’t matter to us. I’d rather see a chubby guy with a fun attitude that loves to kiss than a hot guy with a crappy attitude who can’t be pleased.:P:P:P

Same with me Audrey! For most of us ladies it is less about the performance, package, looks. More about how we were treated! The connection is and has always been most important to all the ladies😘

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Being newer and ever so human with all of the baggage that can bring, I admit I think about my shortcomings quite often.  It is during the cold light of day that these thoughts arise for me.  Did she laugh her arse off after I left? Is she thinking that my next call is definitely going to voicemail? And it gets uglier, dark space inside my head somedays......   BUT in the moment every lady that I have been honored to share time with has made sure it is just about us and been completely accepting of myself and my faults.  At least none have screamed and run into the night,  yet.....  Reality check though.  There will always be somebody better looking, better shape, larger, thicker, thinner, shorter, better technique with this or that.  That is just reality.  Personally when my mind starts down the dark road I just laugh it off and remind myself that DAMN That Was Fun!!!!

I do wonder if the ladies ever wander down this road??  The same issues that can be worrisome for clients can also cross the line....  If it does ladies, Knock it off!!  Works for me.

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All of you men are beautifully perfect just the way you are. 

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2 hours ago, Audrey Astor said:

Most of those things don’t matter to us. I’d rather see a chubby guy with a fun attitude that loves to kiss than a hot guy with a crappy attitude who can’t be pleased.:P:P:P

Glad to hear that Audrey! My momma always said "Attitude is everything,  choose a good one and have fun!" 😉

Edited by Funl0veR
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18 minutes ago, Laci French said:

All of you men are beautifully perfect just the way you are. 

Ummm. Sorry but you left the wo off.....

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2 hours ago, Audrey Astor said:

Most of those things don’t matter to us. I’d rather see a chubby guy with a fun attitude that loves to kiss than a hot guy with a crappy attitude who can’t be pleased.:P:P:P

YES 😍😍😍

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30 minutes ago, BeenHereDoingThis said:

Being newer and ever so human with all of the baggage that can bring, I admit I think about my shortcomings quite often.  It is during the cold light of day that these thoughts arise for me.  Did she laugh her arse off after I left? Is she thinking that my next call is definitely going to voicemail? And it gets uglier, dark space inside my head somedays......   BUT in the moment every lady that I have been honored to share time with has made sure it is just about us and been completely accepting of myself and my faults.  At least none have screamed and run into the night,  yet.....  Reality check though.  There will always be somebody better looking, better shape, larger, thicker, thinner, shorter, better technique with this or that.  That is just reality.  Personally when my mind starts down the dark road I just laugh it off and remind myself that DAMN That Was Fun!!!!

I do wonder if the ladies ever wander down this road??  The same issues that can be worrisome for clients can also cross the line....  If it does ladies, Knock it off!!  Works for me.

When you ask if you wonder if any of the ladies wonder down this road?

If you are talking about feeling like we are being unfairly judged by our  looks, personality, anything of this nature? Hell yes!!! All the time. I miss my reviews. Also, I believe that the ladies have come to understand and accept that is a highly superficial realm we work in. I often laugh at myself too! I look for reason to be proud of myself in life. I have a happy full life outside of being a provider. When given or hearing a negative remark either in my office (RW ) job or with this world. I will question it within my head, talk to a close friend. Furthermore, I will often  look for  an opportunity to work on myself and meditate  if I am at lost for how to change? Meditation is the best policy if I am totally lost. It is totally human nature to question yourself and if you are doing things right! I get this totally. Nobody is exempt! 

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Kali, exactly my point.  We are all human and sometimes thoughts pop up, here and in the RW, although this topic was about the Hobby the same can be said about the Real World as well if not more.  Can I do that? Was that complaint fair? 

One thought for the ladies.  Speaking for myself. Your "perceived flaws" are sometimes the very thing that makes you so attractive to me!!!!  JMHO

BHDT punching out!

 

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47 minutes ago, BeenHereDoingThis said:

Kali, exactly my point.  We are all human and sometimes thoughts pop up, here and in the RW, although this topic was about the Hobby the same can be said about the Real World as well if not more.  Can I do that? Was that complaint fair? 

One thought for the ladies.  Speaking for myself. Your "perceived flaws" are sometimes the very thing that makes you so attractive to me!!!!  JMHO

BHDT punching out!

 

You say it far better Beenhere! 

Should have read through what I said before I pushed the send button! Damn! Oh well! 

It is also very normal to act or leap before you seriously look at the bigger picture. Sometimes I jump fast before I have take time out to really look at all issues. Then I am left needing to apologize or explain myself. Life is just that way! Thank you for being my friend 💋thank you all!

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4 hours ago, Audrey Astor said:

Most of those things don’t matter to us. I’d rather see a chubby guy with a fun attitude that loves to kiss...

I resemble that remark!!!!  :D

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4 hours ago, BadBoy said:

Now it may seem to you that I am simply a slutty moron who simply surrenders himself to the moment and gets completely absorbed in the flow of the bodies without any meaningful thoughts or preconceived expectations of what might happen.

You would be correct.

I just think we all are different, some people think more, some people think less, some people don't think :D

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13 hours ago, Bora Bora said:

Probably this idea has already been mentioned here, but I just remembered that some time ago I was talking with a lady about the physical appearance and sexual performance of her clients. 

She said something like this:

"A client have to remember that a provider most probably has met with men that are:  (choose) uglier or fatter or with a smaller penis or worse in bed than him, BUT... most probably she also has seen men much more handsome or athletic or better endowed or better in bed... than him"

Wise words for the average guys in any of the above mentioned characteristics!!

I consider myself an average guy, so I realize both sides of her comment.  Glad to hear from so many ladies that "average" is okay.  I used to be very self conscious as I got older....got heavier, shrank a bit (and I was already short) and other physical things changed...and not for the better.  What I have tried to keep the same, or maybe even grow a bit, is that I try to treat the ladies (and all people I meet) with respect and dignity.  I also try to be real, take things lightly, have a sense of humor (though it may be kind of corny) and try to make a connection with the person I am with.  No porn star or movie star here.  Just an "ordinary average guy" who enjoys the hobby and meeting a variety of ladies for some fun.  Just my Saturday morning musings while I get ready to do some responsible chores !!  

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27 minutes ago, average1 said:

I consider myself an average guy, so I realize both sides of her comment.  Glad to hear from so many ladies that "average" is okay.  I used to be very self conscious as I got older....got heavier, shrank a bit (and I was already short) and other physical things changed...and not for the better.  What I have tried to keep the same, or maybe even grow a bit, is that I try to treat the ladies (and all people I meet) with respect and dignity.  I also try to be real, take things lightly, have a sense of humor (though it may be kind of corny) and try to make a connection with the person I am with.  No porn star or movie star here.  Just an "ordinary average guy" who enjoys the hobby and meeting a variety of ladies for some fun.  Just my Saturday morning musings while I get ready to do some responsible chores !!  

Wise words as well!

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11 hours ago, Laci French said:

 

11 hours ago, Laci French said:

All of you men are beautifully perfect just the way you are. 

As with all of you ladies each of you is perfect in your own way. Enjoying the company of those you are with is the most important thing you have fun when you make your partner have fun I believe that's what it's all about. Fretting over what might be perceived as an imperfection or failing is not the way to have fun. Simply enjoy life and enjoy those you're with

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20 hours ago, BadBoy said:

It occurs to me that many of the gentlemen here cause unnecessary problems for themselves by engaging in a certain inappropriate activity:

Thinking.

You guys think too damned much - half the time I am imagining the guys constructing spreadsheets to analyze the encounters and their expectations.  Dudes, this is an adrenaline sport, you should stop thinking and let the little guy drive for a change.

The absolute last things I am thinking about by the time we hit the sheets include:

- What she thinks of other guys, and how I compare (who gives a shit?)

- Whether she is a few years older than her photos (is she naked?  If so, who gives a shit how old she is ?)

- How much I paid for time and companionship.

- What list of acronyms some other guy was able to "achieve."

- The fact that I can't read any reviews on her.

What I am thinking about by the time we hit the sheets:

- How she smells, tastes, feels, tastes, sounds, tastes, kisses, tastes .....

- What seems to be working in the foreplay department.

- What she seems to want to try in the foreplay department.

- Is the little guy ready for full-on action yet?

Etc.

Now it may seem to you that I am simply a slutty moron who simply surrenders himself to the moment and gets completely absorbed in the flow of the bodies without any meaningful thoughts or preconceived expectations of what might happen.

You would be correct.

But, I am an extremely happy and satisfied  slutty moron who on hundreds of wonderful occasions has simply surrendered himself to the moment and gets completely absorbed in the flow of the bodies without any meaningful thoughts or preconceived expectations of what might happen.

If you are not happy in the sport, you might try stopping with all the thinking (after you have completed the extremely thorough and thoughtful screening, of course).

If you are already happy and satisfied - "nevermind."

 

I agree. The appointment is the ritual. There is no place for thinking there. That should have been done already. You walk into the ritual chamber nakedly naive, with the acceptance that you have prepared as much as should be appropriate for the occasion. You will get the planning wrong sometimes. Yet, while you are armed with only the rawness of yourself, you come prepared to explore the total moment. Adorn yourself with absence and find joy.

Salute, good soldier. Your are going places many folk will never travel. 

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1 hour ago, Vassago said:

I agree. The appointment is the ritual. There is no place for thinking there. That should have been done already. You walk into the ritual chamber nakedly naive, with the acceptance that you have prepared as much as should be appropriate for the occasion. You will get the planning wrong sometimes. Yet, while you are armed with only the rawness of yourself, you come prepared to explore the total moment. Adorn yourself with absence and find joy.

Salute, good soldier. Your are going places many folk will never travel. 

That is so true and I’m pretty excited to be able to fully understand your post.  

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