Audrey Astor

Seriously? Guys what do you think?

51 posts in this topic

So, I just received a PM from a longstanding member that I have never met, screened or had a conversation. He asked, my cross streets, and then asked if I offer unsafe services that should never be requested. I normally ignore this type of thing, however since he was a longtime member, I was quite shocked and had to reply advising that he was totally crossing the lines, and should Pre-screen, not ask for unsafe stuff etc. He writes back wishing me good luck with my rules, restrictions and lecturing other guys. :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

So.... Guys what do you think???

We have discussed how to contact the ladies, what is appropriate, where to visit in Denver, and where to eat in Denver over and over. The board is getting cluttered. It would be nice to have a some stickies with this kind of stuff. :)

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21 minutes ago, Audrey Astor said:

So, I just received a PM from a longstanding member that I have never met, screened or had a conversation. He asked, my cross streets, and then asked if I offer unsafe services that should never be requested. I normally ignore this type of thing, however since he was a longtime member, I was quite shocked and had to reply advising that he was totally crossing the lines, and should Pre-screen, not ask for unsafe stuff etc. He writes back wishing me good luck with my rules, restrictions and lecturing other guys. :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

So.... Guys what do you think???

We have discussed how to contact the ladies, what is appropriate, where to visit in Denver, and where to eat in Denver over and over. The board is getting cluttered. It would be nice to have a some stickies with this kind of stuff. :)

I’m shocked that he would ask you such stupid questions considering he was a long standing member and should know the etiquette. I wonder how he could be so successful with the ladies on this board in the past if he was that intrusive. I feel you did the right thing in this case. I would wish him good luck as well because it sounds like he will need it  and also tell him “Bye Felicia”.

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Wow, what a dummass, tell him to meet you at our shooting range lol. I could see it from a refugee but not a long standing member. Report him to the mods and P411. Need to put a stop to this person. 

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We need many stickies, but nobody would read them😂😂

Appears this morning that reading the shorter listings is too much for some😕  Think today is a perfect day to make snow angels

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3 minutes ago, Laci French said:

PM all the ladies and we will place him on our DNS list. 💥 💥 

Yes!!!

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Once again it appears that stupidity ignorance and just plain Bad Manners run rampant in the world you should never be subjected to this kind of harassment stay as strong resilient and beautiful as you are hold your ground

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There are several long time ass hat members right here in River City.  (I know .... shock and amazement, the crowd gasps). They usually reserve this type of behavior for new, young and inexperienced ladies that they think can be intimidated by dangling reviews, threatening bad reviews, etc.  In the current climate some believe ladies are more desperate and that they can get away with this shit with more experienced ladies too.  Just add to "oh hell no' list, share the listing with friends privately and move on.  Do not dignify with a response.

Related: has FOSTA, etc. taken down BL sites too or are they still up?

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The scary thing is that as a longstanding member he may have had some success with this approach in the past. :o  

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Audrey, so sorry this happened to you.  It sucks that someone who is a long standing member of our community exercised such poor judgment and behavior.  With the recent changes, apparently some people have an overblown sense of entitlement.  I always hope each of us are treated with respect, like real people, and I mean this for both sides of our hobby.  Don't let this ruin your day.  You handled it in the best way possible.  I'm not sure stickies would help.  I think there is a chance that the people who should read them won't.  But who knows, I've been wrong many, many, many times...and that is just in the last day or two.  Wishing you a satisfying Saturday.  ;)

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1 hour ago, Audrey Astor said:

He writes back wishing me good luck with my rules, restrictions and lecturing other guys. :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

You really never know what a person is like behind their anonymous persona. Guessing lots of guys are thinking the ladies are all desperate and willing to do anything for a buck.

1 hour ago, Laci French said:

We need many stickies, but nobody would read them😂😂

How true.

44 minutes ago, Mustang87 said:

The scary thing is that as a longstanding member he may have had some success with this approach in the past. :o  

I have brought this up in the past, anytime the unsafe services topic pops up. Never know who, client or provider, is indulging in such things. People might talk a good talk, but behind closed doors... 

Only you (general you) can control your level of safety.

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1 hour ago, Audrey Astor said:

So, I just received a PM from a longstanding member that I have never met, screened or had a conversation. He asked, my cross streets, and then asked if I offer unsafe services that should never be requested. I normally ignore this type of thing, however since he was a longtime member, I was quite shocked and had to reply advising that he was totally crossing the lines, and should Pre-screen, not ask for unsafe stuff etc. He writes back wishing me good luck with my rules, restrictions and lecturing other guys. :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

So.... Guys what do you think???

We have discussed how to contact the ladies, what is appropriate, where to visit in Denver, and where to eat in Denver over and over. The board is getting cluttered. It would be nice to have a some stickies with this kind of stuff. :)

I don't know what the guys think, but as a provider, I've always said it doesn't matter how many posts or reviews a member has...screen, screen, screen! Get references! And ladies please be honest. I know some providers will only say he's ok, safe, or fine, and thats your choice, and I appreciate you for even giving that much. But for me, that alone will never be enough, coupled with another provider reference or multiple references, yes, that does help. I'll take as much info as I can get. Just because a client has been a member for a long time doesn't mean squat in my book. When I started out, I was treated very poorly by someone who was a well known reviewer. I learned my lesson quick, and won't make that mistake again. Good girl Audrey for this post. It's important to talk about these things.  Just like we dont want providers out there treating our gents poorly, we dont want good girls having bad experiences in the hobby either, or thinking they have to cut corners for anyone. Thanks for sharing your experience. 

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1 hour ago, Laci French said:

PM all the ladies and we will place him on our DNS list. 💥 💥 

Yep!

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1 hour ago, PieluvinTexan said:

I’m shocked that he would ask you such stupid questions considering he was a long standing member and should know the etiquette. I wonder how he could be so successful with the ladies on this board in the past if he was that intrusive. I feel you did the right thing in this case. I would wish him good luck as well because it sounds like he will need it  and also tell him “Bye Felicia”.

There are members who think the rules dont apply to them, or they should be able to bypass screening, because they have established a rep on the board. Providers will not go wrong sticking to their tried and true screening methods. 

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1 hour ago, gr8owl said:

There are several long time ass hat members right here in River City.  (I know .... shock and amazement, the crowd gasps). They usually reserve this type of behavior for new, young and inexperienced ladies that they think can be intimidated by dangling reviews, threatening bad reviews, etc.  In the current climate some believe ladies are more desperate and that they can get away with this shit with more experienced ladies too.  Just add to "oh hell no' list, share the listing with friends privately and move on.  Do not dignify with a response.

Related: has FOSTA, etc. taken down BL sites too or are they still up?

This guy gets it ^^^ I'm honestly shocked he came at Audrey this way. If he can behave this way to her, a veteran, you can only imagine how he behaves with a newbie provider. 

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Audrey, it sounds like he lost his fucking mind.

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Audrey,

His behavior and inquiry is way out of line for anyone, let alone a long standing member.

Definitely let all the ladies know who he is and place him on any black posts that exist.

Block him as well.

 

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After reading the PM, this one needs a life time ban.   We should have a way to report, and delete...

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He would keep coming back like a bad hangover and pulling his same *#%!  

Best we know his handle and just avoid. 

Ladies, those snow angels I spoke of have worked wonders for my psyche today. 

Gentleman, don’t be a doofus when speaking to us ladies. A little respect goes a looong way!  

 

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1 hour ago, Laci French said:

He would keep coming back like a bad hangover and pulling his same *#%!  

Best we know his handle and just avoid. 

Ladies, those snow angels I spoke of have worked wonders for my psyche today. 

Gentleman, don’t be a doofus when speaking to us ladies. A little respect goes a looong way!  

 

Snow angels? Got pictures?

Sorry kind of off the thread 

 

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As part of screening have any of you ladies ever met a potential in public prior to agreeing to an appointment.  No, I'm not talking about a date, just a quick meeting to assess compatibility and normalcy?  I sort of work in sales and I do that regularly to find out if this is someone who is on the same page as me and find out if we will work well together.  Usually at Starbucks, and YES I order a drink so I don't get arrested.

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Since you asked the question,  the answer is I have no clue what he was thinking. Maybe he figured it was desperate times or he is not going to hobby on ToB much longer. Either way send the info to the other ladies and hope it keeps all of you safe.

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Only a few Guys left that are decent I decided to leave I'm just spinning my wheels and spending my savings

Edited by Chloeblue83
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Can't think that would be something that should tolerated in any way.

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11 minutes ago, Chloeblue83 said:

Only a few Guys left that are decent I decided to leave I'm just spinning my wheels and spending my savings

I'm so sad to hear this. I'm sorry sweetheart. This kind of shit sucks, and really pisses me off.

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5 hours ago, Hunter VanDyke said:

I don't know what the guys think, but as a provider, I've always said it doesn't matter how many posts or reviews a member has...screen, screen, screen! Get references! And ladies please be honest. I know some providers will only say he's ok, safe, or fine, and thats your choice, and I appreciate you for even giving that much. But for me, that alone will never be enough, coupled with another provider reference or multiple references, yes, that does help. I'll take as much info as I can get. Just because a client has been a member for a long time doesn't mean squat in my book. When I started out, I was treated very poorly by someone who was a well known reviewer. I learned my lesson quick, and won't make that mistake again. Good girl Audrey for this post. It's important to talk about these things.  Just like we dont want providers out there treating our gents poorly, we dont want good girls having bad experiences in the hobby either, or thinking they have to cut corners for anyone. Thanks for sharing your experience. 

This is why I like to give more of a description and if it has been more than a few months  since I've seen him? I definitely need the client to contact me prior to contacting the new provider. Because one thing I will never do is give out a Fake OK on a Client.  What is ok for me sometimes is not ok for another too. We must take all of that into consideration. So, yes please understand how important giving a description  to another provider can be. Also, How unacceptable it is for someone to ask suck questions of a provider. and yes I get those questions too, but never from a TOB member. NEVER!!!  I look at this way, what is not being said about the client is even more scary to me and NOTHING goes on said! 

  Also, If this guy so boldly asked you such questions and he is from TOB and has reviews? Just imagine how he behaves in private. These girls need to seriously be careful! Let's continue to watch out for each other please. 

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9 hours ago, Audrey Astor said:

So.... Guys what do you think???

 

Thank you for posting this, and PMing the other ladies. IMO providers should be warned about this guy as thoroughly as possible.  

Standing Ovation Clap GIF

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6 hours ago, Raine-7379 said:

After reading the PM, this one needs a life time ban.   We should have a way to report, and delete...

There is a "report" link in every private message.

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4 minutes ago, boink36 said:

There is a "report" link in every private message.

Well would ya look at that! There sure is! Thanks boink! 

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“Something is rotten in the state of Denmark”

Seriously though, why wouldn’t this be a private discussion with the moderators?

I’m sorry this happened. Ghouls feed after war, but making this a public service announcement seems odd to me.

Don’t get me wrong, I believe you. Just find the post .... Giles Corey like.

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