False References

[boink36]

On 9/27/2017 at 2:35 PM, Kali Sensual Reiki said:

The only answer I needed from O was either this or lets talk some time and find out if our styles mesh well? Very simple!

OK - OK, I give, I will do doubles with you but only if my name is first in the ad. 

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

14 minutes ago, boink36 said:

OK - OK, I give, I will do doubles with you but only if my name is first in the ad. 

Boink all the TOB ladies would be insanely jelious of me!!!😱😱

[Yorick]

I thought "boink Kali" was already an option?

[Laci French]

Too funny!

[Mr.Pink]

On 7/27/2017 at 6:47 AM, SultryKitten said:

They are worthless if you haven't had an ok in over 6 months because guys tend to think that because they have over 40 oks they are fine when in reality we have had cases where guys have that many, and they turn around and get violent(among other things). If you want to use P411 and use it as a reference tool, you need to keep it current by not being lazy and thinnking that your past is going to get you through the door.

I understand that some of you find an ATF, and that is ok...have her give out a reference if you are feeling a certain "itch" she can't scratch, but if you found one on P411 and still seeing her, ask her to update the ok...they tend to be more than happy to do that.

xoxo,

Samantha Sheppard

sometimes guys take a break.....then all of a sudden they turn into a raging psycho cause you wont see them?

[SultryKitten]

9 minutes ago, Mr.Pink said:

sometimes guys take a break.....then all of a sudden they turn into a raging psycho cause you wont see them?

Well, I did see a guy for about 14 years of my career who a couple of years ago started pushing my boundaries until I finally quit seeing him. About a month ago, someone notified me of a rapist on the sex offender list and it was him with a real name that he never used with me.  So yeah, call me paranoid, but I will keep my insanely crazy rules to protect myself and other ladies that work this industry.

xoxo,

Samantha Sheppard

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

4 hours ago, SultryKitten said:

Well, I did see a guy for about 14 years of my career who a couple of years ago started pushing my boundaries until I finally quit seeing him. About a month ago, someone notified me of a rapist on the sex offender list and it was him with a real name that he never used with me.  So yeah, call me paranoid, but I will keep my insanely crazy rules to protect myself and other ladies that work this industry.

xoxo,

Samantha Sheppard

Samantha, 

 That is so scary... When you feel as though your boundaries are being pushed It is time to shut the door on the relationship you have with that individual. I too have done the very same with a couple. Ran out of my house from a stalker in the past. He was looking in my windows. There is just too many things that can go wrong within our line of work. 

9 hours ago, Yorick said:

I thought "boink Kali" was already an option?en

Why yes it is! As long as the behavior is fun and nobody gets too crazy...well then again, I might enjoy a bit of mayhem within reason Yorick! 

Been so sucked into the old TV show "Kung Fu" lately!  I thinking I am starting to look a bit like Master PO and  you  just might find me in Chinatown.

Love Eastern thinking and don't give a rats ass if  the show is a little hokey. Kung Fu is awesome!!! 

[Bit Banger]

11 minutes ago, Kali Sensual Reiki said:

Samantha, 

 That is so scary... When you feel as though your boundaries are being pushed It is time to shut the door on the relationship you have with that individual. I too have done the very same with a couple. Ran out of my house from a stalker in the past. He was looking in my windows. There is just too many things that can go wrong within our line of work. 

Why yes it is! As long as the behavior is fun and nobody gets too crazy...well then again, I might enjoy a bit of mayhem within reason Yorick! 

Been so sucked into the old TV show "Kung Fu" lately!  I thinking I am starting to look a bit like Master PO and  you  just might find me in Chinatown.

Love Eastern thinking and don't give a rats ass if  the show is a little hokey. Kung Fu is awesome!!! 

Check out "Kung Fu - The Legend Continues" when you finish with the original series. 

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

13 minutes ago, Bit Banger said:

Check out "Kung Fu - The Legend Continues" when you finish with the original series. 

Already have the CD's  ready to go next! Comfort shows for me Bit! I am just about there now! Taking my time. Do you believe that Cain is really his dad? Just something that I keep thinking about as I watch the shows, kind of like past lives recycling.  I know i am driving my friends crazy. Because lately this is all I have been talking about for the last couple of months. Reiki is a form of Martial arts. I love Qigong, fluid movement. Hell I live my life in meditative state.

 Sorry I am off topic. 

 

 

13 minutes ago, Bit Banger said:

Check out "Kung Fu - The Legend Continues" when you finish with the original series. 

 

[Bit Banger]

6 minutes ago, Kali Sensual Reiki said:

... Do you believe that Cain is really his dad? . 

Having watched the show for several years - Yes. 

I also found this to be one of the best TV show re-boots ever.  They reference the old show, and even weave it into the future, w/o jumping the shark. 

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

4 hours ago, Bit Banger said:

Having watched the show for several years - Yes. 

I also found this to be one of the best TV show re-boots ever.  They reference the old show, and even weave it into the future, w/o jumping the shark. 

 Not sleeping much. Thank you for that conformation.

The mental references back and forth of applying the past  in refrence to what currently going on within any particular situation (in the moment). Love how one problem may relate to something from the past that he learned.   Because it requires deeper meditation and the ability to be active in the moment enough to  slow down that of thought process in the human mind. While most of us tend yo lose focus do to fear or anger. He is able to flow through the problem like it is water. Totally unruffled.

Passiveness within the moment=meditation 

Stand still long enough and the world will come to you. -Kung Fu

Well for what it is worth this is why I love this show. 

 

 

[Bit Banger]

Oops! Sorry, Kali, perhaps I should have given you a Spoiler Alert because that question provides the tension for much of the first season. 

[SultryKitten]

8 hours ago, Kali Sensual Reiki said:

 Not sleeping much. Thank you for that conformation.

The mental references back and forth of applying the past  in refrence to what currently going on within any particular situation (in the moment). Love how one problem may relate to something from the past that he learned.   Because it requires deeper meditation and the ability to be active in the moment enough to  slow down that of thought process in the human mind. While most of us tend yo lose focus do to fear or anger. He is able to flow through the problem like it is water. Totally unruffled.

Passiveness within the moment=meditation 

Stand still long enough and the world will come to you. -Kung Fu

Well for what it is worth this is why I love this show. 

 

 

I need to watch this...these kind of things I love! 

xoxo,

Samantha Sheppard

[Boredandhorny]

I’m fairly new to all of this, however the first couple ladies I tried to see were not newbie friendly. The ladies I was able to meet with without references were kind enough to accept my provider reference request.  Now I’m thinking the reference verification should be easy, but it’s still not easy. The last provider that I shared my references with made some calls but my references didn’t remember who I was so I was turned down for her services. 

So I guess what I’m really asking is what good does it do to ask for and receive references?  If they approved my reference request 2 months ago but don’t remember the details then it’s worthless. 

What do I need to do ladies?

[Admiral C]

On 9/30/2017 at 8:54 PM, Bit Banger said:

Check out "Kung Fu - The Legend Continues" when you finish with the original series. 

Absolutely the BEST theme music ever....IMHO of course....

 

[Mr.Pink]

i thought master kan was the best.

 

[Mr.Pink]

for the ladies:

 

[Audrey Astor]

9 hours ago, Boredandhorny said:

I’m fairly new to all of this, however the first couple ladies I tried to see were not newbie friendly. The ladies I was able to meet with without references were kind enough to accept my provider reference request.  Now I’m thinking the reference verification should be easy, but it’s still not easy. The last provider that I shared my references with made some calls but my references didn’t remember who I was so I was turned down for her services. 

So I guess what I’m really asking is what good does it do to ask for and receive references?  If they approved my reference request 2 months ago but don’t remember the details then it’s worthless. 

What do I need to do ladies?

You might ask the guys who they see that have always answered requests for references for them. There are some ladies who require references, but then refuse to give them in return (this is an ongoing subject). If you go this route, you will also want the lady to be newbie friendly. Newbie friendly does usually require giving up some RW information. Don't expect to be able to call using a fake persona and VOIP number (that has been a real issue as well).

The other option may be to join P411. Then your references/oks are directly on your profile. 

I feel bad for the real guys/ the honest guys who think they are going to have a reference only to be pussy blocked.

Good luck.

[Gemma Chang]

On 7/26/2017 at 8:49 PM, Lucy Kitten said:

Since despite all these current issues references still seem to be preferred so maybe it's time someone takes a different approach. Instead of just a simple OK maybe we should review our clients with a little bit more detail. Just a few sentences on behavior, timeliness, hygiene, quirks etc. If we took five minutes to jot down a note on our clients we save ourselves tons of time on references. Often the hardest part of references is actually getting them, some don't respond, some are just rude and some take forever. But if we write down those details then they're there for everyone to see when then need to see them. Like blacklists but not.

I also like the idea of being able to gush about good clients. I like giving my awesome clients good references. I am happy for other ladies when these great guys choose to see them because I am pretty certain they're going to have a good time. I think a whitelist also encourages ladies to play a little bit more fair and lessen tension. There's no refusing references to ladies you don't like, night owls can get the info they need, short notice appointments are made easier. I know that everyone has their own way of doing things but if reference protocol was a bit more standard it would be much easier.

 

I remember reading, when I first began to screen for myself outside of an agency, that references were meant to tell you a bit about what to expect from the client. Comparable to a friend setting you up with a guy or girls talking boys. So far, all of the okays I've received from providers here in CO have been along the lines of "yup he's fine" and that's all she wrote. I've gotten a lot more detail in references from reaching out to providers in other states. I understand how competition can get the best of us, but shouldn't we be sticking together to keep one another safe? 

[Kali Sensual Reiki]

2 hours ago, Gemma Chang said:

I remember reading, when I first began to screen for myself outside of an agency, that references were meant to tell you a bit about what to expect from the client. Comparable to a friend setting you up with a guy or girls talking boys. So far, all of the okays I've received from providers here in CO have been along the lines of "yup he's fine" and that's all she wrote. I've gotten a lot more detail in references from reaching out to providers in other states. I understand how competition can get the best of us, but shouldn't we be sticking together to keep one another safe? 

Gemma, 

My point exactly! I must be able to give a reference properly. Share something that will properly give refrence to his demeanor/ what he looks like/enjoys that will help the new provider. That is exactly why I tell the clients to contact me first to jog my memory if it has been longer than 4 months. Simply saying I have his number is not enough to give. 

11 hours ago, Admiral C said:

Absolutely the BEST theme music ever....IMHO of course....

 

Bloody Marvelous Grasshopper!!

Been reading up on the newer series. I guess "The Ancient" Ping Hei. He also loves The Greatful Dead! 😎😎 . 

Edited October 2, 2017 by Kali Sensual Reiki

[BadBoy]

19 hours ago, Boredandhorny said:

I’m fairly new to all of this, however the first couple ladies I tried to see were not newbie friendly. The ladies I was able to meet with without references were kind enough to accept my provider reference request.  Now I’m thinking the reference verification should be easy, but it’s still not easy. The last provider that I shared my references with made some calls but my references didn’t remember who I was so I was turned down for her services. 

So I guess what I’m really asking is what good does it do to ask for and receive references?  If they approved my reference request 2 months ago but don’t remember the details then it’s worthless. 

What do I need to do ladies?

Well, I am not a lady, but here is my input on what you need to do:

1.  Don't wait so long between appointments - you just saw that they cannot remember you after two months, so make it two weeks (or better yet, two days).

2.  Speak up dude!  If you had a good time, ask them to give you a TOB reference.  That will help.

3.  Write a review.  Some gals will accept a few reviews as evidence you are OK, especially if you have some other bonus points (like a TOB reference).  Needless to say, make your reviews gentlemanly.

4.  Help them remember you!  If you had a good time, you ought to come back more than once.  For one, it just gets better and more fun when you get to know each other.  For another, you are not going to be just another random one-off dude asking for a reference, they will remember you.  If you insist on being a one-and-done guy, bring a nice gift and, upon soliciting a reference, remind her that you are the guy who brought her the gift.

5.  And of course, and not to sound like a broken record, join P411 and ask for OKs.  So far in my sporting life that has been the gold standard for meeting someone new.  Even if he/she  isn't a member of P411, sometimes when you tell her that you have 20+ OKs on P411 and will send them a request, that will be enough, even if you can't really send a request (because she isn't a P411 member).

6.  Contact her the way she specifies in her ad - as was illustrated in recent threads, this is a screening device for the ladies.  Use complete sentences, correct spelling, good grammar, polite language and don't ask about rates, activities, etc.  I.e. be a gentleman.

Finally, dude, get a different handle.  Do you really think "Boredandhorny" is going to light any fires of desire?  Seriously, use a adjective-noun combo that doesn't sound so loser-ish.  How about "WellHung," or "TooBig,"  oops, that one is taken, but you get the idea.

Edited October 2, 2017 by BadBoy
Kinda felt like it