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Looking from the outside in....

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Ok...here goes... Since I've started doing this almost a year ago...I've experienced things I never thought I would... Being of a very open mind I thought " ok lets do this"...

Never doing anything remotely like this before in my life, met some very interesting people...some not so much.... So now I feel as if I'm at a crossroad... I love most of the people I've met so far.... But am I really meant for this?.... I love people and love how they respond to who I truly am... Yes...this is a very dangerous field... But sometimes its amazing ..... Anyone else ever felt this way?....

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1 hour ago, Bella Marie said:

Ok...here goes... Since I've started doing this almost a year ago...I've experienced things I never thought I would... Being of a very open mind I thought " ok lets do this"...

Never doing anything remotely like this before in my life, I've meet some very interesting people...some not so much.... So now I feel as if I'm at a crossroad... I love most of the people I've met so far.... But am I really meant for this?.... I love people and love how they respond to who I truly am... Yes...this is a very dangerous field... But sometimes its amazing ..... Anyone else ever felt this way?....

All the time. I worry about my safety constantly and sometimes it eats at my conscience, especially after a really rough session. I too love this job and all the rewards it offers, but at times I wonder if it's worth the risk. I try to be as safe as possible and make sure I see clients that have references but sometimes a few bad eggs have slipped thru the cracks leaving me in a awkward situation. Thankfully nothing bad has happened but the thought is always on my mind. I've even been thinking about working at some of the legal brothels in Nevada because at least there is security there so it's a little safer but I've heard mixed reviews on them so I'm not sure if that's something I'd want to do. Plus I'm really enjoying being independent, since I worked exclusively through an escort service for years. But I feel the same way too sometimes Bella but like you, I love doing this. We just have to be safe at all times and never do anything we don't feel comfortable doing. ❤️

Cali 🌹

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10 minutes ago, Cali Rose said:

All the time. I worry about my safety constantly and sometimes it eats at my conscience, especially after a really rough session. I too love this job and all the rewards it offers, but at times I wonder if it's worth the risk. I try to be as safe as possible and make sure I see clients that have references but sometimes a few bad eggs have slipped thru the cracks leaving me in a awkward situation. Thankfully nothing bad has happened but the thought is always on my mind. I've even been thinking about working at some of the legal brothels in Nevada because at least there is security there so it's a little safer but I've heard mixed reviews on them so I'm not sure if that's something I'd want to do. Plus I'm really enjoying being independent, since I worked exclusively through an escort service for years. But I feel the same way too sometimes Bella but like you, I love doing this. We just have to be safe at all times and never do anything we don't feel comfortable doing. ❤️

Cali 🌹

Thank you Cali...its nice to know I'm not alone💋

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Don't know if still true, but gals used to work in pairs, or even packs. Still independents, just friends working together. They'd often get adjacent, or even adjoining rooms. Share each other's schedule and let each other know at the end of a session. Something as simple as a 2-ring hang-up call to not interrupt her partner's business. Sometimes they'd do doubles together. 

There were occasions when I'd ask a gal to lunch after playtime and end up with 3 at the table. 

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2 minutes ago, Bit Banger said:

Don't know if still true, but gals used to work in pairs, or even packs. Still independents, just friends working together. They'd often get adjacent, or even adjoining rooms. Share each other's schedule and let each other know at the end of a session. Something as simple as a 2-ring hang-up call to not interrupt her partner's business. Sometimes they'd do doubles together. 

There were occasions when I'd ask a gal to lunch after playtime and end up with 3 at the table. 

Thank you for your input.... I have met a few ladies that I have had a connection with....but I keep a close circle around me and there are few that get that close....

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Understood. There are a very few guys I'm willing to party with myself.  

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1 hour ago, Bit Banger said:

Don't know if still true, but gals used to work in pairs, or even packs. Still independents, just friends working together. They'd often get adjacent, or even adjoining rooms. Share each other's schedule and let each other know at the end of a session. Something as simple as a 2-ring hang-up call to not interrupt her partner's business. Sometimes they'd do doubles together. 

There were occasions when I'd ask a gal to lunch after playtime and end up with 3 at the table. 

Oh I remember those days! they were to be enjoyed. unfortunately business isn't like that anymore :( (major sad face) women are vicious demanding and conniving when it comes to money. and I've had my fair share of stabs in the back and hurt feelings ..therefore I  chose to stay independent ..work alone and not involve anybody in my personal business ever again and it has worked out lovely to my advantage..

As far as feeling for my safety ..I don't much anymore.. I've taken classes, certain defense training and advice from all walks of life that help me in my day-to-day decisions. at the end of the day all my actions are on me nobody else.. 

I'm sorry you ladies feel this way.. I wish there was something I could say or do to show you all the lovely in and outs of this business, but only being in the business for a year or so,  I can't help with that ..I am a decade-long lover of this Hobby since college. 

This isn't for the light or faint-hearted ..you really do have to have something special to be in this Hobby ,and it's only up to you to figure out if it's for you or not. nobody can offer you the advice you seek on this matter. I really wish it were different but this isn't like a same size fits all situation.

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I think a lot of us have had these feelings at one time or another. It is important that we take time for ourselves, and fill ourselves back up. That may look like exercise, meditation, family time etc. We are constantly putting out (literally, haha), we have to put back in as well. 

You have probably already discovered that it can be a fairly lonely. If you choose to stay, you might consider enrolling in a personal defense class. You have nothing to lose. It can be fairly liberating, and a boost in confidence. :-)  

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1 hour ago, Audrey Astor said:

I think a lot of us have had these feelings at one time or another. It is important that we take time for ourselves, and fill ourselves back up. That may look like exercise, meditation, family time etc. We are constantly putting out (literally, haha), we have to put back in as well. 

You have probably already discovered that it can be a fairly lonely. If you choose to stay, you might consider enrolling in a personal defense class. You have nothing to lose. It can be fairly liberating, and a boost in confidence. :-)  

Audrey.... Thank you....that is a great idea....also getting a conceal permit helps as well💋

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22 minutes ago, Bella Marie said:

Audrey.... Thank you....that is a great idea....also getting a conceal permit helps as well💋

Now the gun-nut in me wants to start a thread about which firearm you (and all providers by extension) should get for CC!

Find out which of your clients fall into this category, and just see if they don't invite you out to the range.

Nothing says "friendship" like double-tapping the same target!

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7 minutes ago, Yorick said:

Now the gun-nut in me wants to start a thread about which firearm you (and all providers by extension) should get for CC!

Find out which of your clients fall into this category, and just see if they don't invite you out to the range.

Nothing says "friendship" like double-tapping the same target!

Already working on that doll😉

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Take a deep breath.....enjoy your life....but keep your shields raised. Safety is key ....but don't let one bad apple spoil anything...everything.

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3 minutes ago, JRWolfe said:

Take a deep breath.....enjoy your life....but keep your shields raised. Safety is key ....but don't let one bad apple spoil anything...everything.

Thank you...I'm not planning on it💋

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5 hours ago, Bit Banger said:

Understood. There are a very few guys I'm willing to party with myself.  

Like the birds and the bees and the crickets? :P

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7 hours ago, Bella Marie said:

Ok...here goes... Since I've started doing this almost a year ago...I've experienced things I never thought I would... Being of a very open mind I thought " ok lets do this"...

Never doing anything remotely like this before in my life, I've meet some very interesting people...some not so much.... So now I feel as if I'm at a crossroad... I love most of the people I've met so far.... But am I really meant for this?.... I love people and love how they respond to who I truly am... Yes...this is a very dangerous field... But sometimes its amazing ..... Anyone else ever felt this way?....

I think we all have times where we are unsure where we might fit in. It's natural to have that perspective about any line of work or anything we pour emotional labor into. As the others have stated, safety comes first. If something doesn't feel right, trust your gut. This community will embrace you, allow it to. The great people I have met along the way are some of the best people I've ever known and the most loyal. There are some bad apples, but you'll meet some honest people. I've noticed this board is a very different vibe than the ones I've seen in the past. They really make an honest space for people to chat and also make connections. I'm happy to have found it. I hope things get better for you and maybe I'll see you around. xo  

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8 hours ago, Bella Marie said:

Ok...here goes... Since I've started doing this almost a year ago...I've experienced things I never thought I would... Being of a very open mind I thought " ok lets do this"...

Never doing anything remotely like this before in my life, I've meet some very interesting people...some not so much.... So now I feel as if I'm at a crossroad... I love most of the people I've met so far.... But am I really meant for this?.... I love people and love how they respond to who I truly am... Yes...this is a very dangerous field... But sometimes its amazing ..... Anyone else ever felt this way?....

Yeah, every single day.  It's called "life."  I am no shrink, but it sounds as if you are getting in touch with a part of yourself that you really enjoy, but you are asking yourself "...am I really meant for this...."  which implies both that you are applying normative standards to your personal, unique, life and that you are buying into the myth that you are what you do.  Again, this is just one perspective, but I have been observing lives for a very long time, including my own, and I think that it is helpful to bear in mind that Popeye the Sailor man was the greatest existential philosopher ever, when he asserted: "I yam what I yam."  I am what I am, and you are what you are, and you are the perfect embodiment of the unique creature that is you, today.  If you like this activity now, today, here, then you are meant to enjoy it here and now.  If you change some day, then you will change  some day.  Do not worry about what you were "meant" to do, you were meant to actualize the person that you are, and right now, today, you are enjoying yourself.

Just one old man's perspective that might change tomorrow.

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1 minute ago, BadBoy said:

Yeah, every single day.  It's called "life."  I am no shrink, but it sounds as if you are getting in touch with a part of yourself that you really enjoy, but you are asking yourself "...am I really meant for this...."  which implies both that you are applying normative standards to your personal, unique, life and that you are buying into the myth that you are what you do.  Again, this is just one perspective, but I have been observing lives for a very long time, including my own, and I think that it is helpful to bear in mind that Popeye the Sailor man was the greatest existential philosopher ever, when he asserted: "I yam what I yam."  I am what I am, and you are what you are, and you are the perfect embodiment of the unique creature that is you, today.  If you like this activity now, today, here, then you are meant to enjoy it here and now.  If you change some day, then you will change  some day.  Do not worry about what you were "meant" to do, you were meant to actualize the person that you are, and right now, today, you are enjoying yourself.

Just one old man's perspective that might change tomorrow.

Well...I like your perspective....thank you...

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To continue with the "I yam what I yam!" theme. 

It's you who defines what that is, not the busybody down the block. Hold positive thoughts about yourself. Define your own yardstick of good, evil, & honor; shape it with a positive world view.  Then hold yourself to those  values. 

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21 minutes ago, Bit Banger said:

To continue with the "I yam what I yam!" theme. 

It's you who defines what that is, not the busybody down the block. Hold positive thoughts about yourself. Define your own yardstick of good, evil, & honor; shape it with a positive world view.  Then hold yourself to those  values. 

What is a person if not a person of their word.....

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In any job, even yours, one reaches a point where much of the "newness" and it's excitement begins to wear off. Then it becomes much more "job like"....with good things and not so good things. This is when people then begin to question that job choice. This I think is the crossroads you are reaching, and I think it is quite important. I have known many providers, quite a few personally and pretty well.  While some ladies just do this between RW jobs, or as college co-eds, many ladies mislead themselves that..."they are just going to do this for a year or two".......or 5....or 10....or 20. The HAPPIEST and most successful ladies BY FAR, are those who make a solid decision that they ARE choosing this as a career. Then, they fully apply professional approaches and attitudes to all aspects....Advertising....money management.....self regeneration.....policies.....etc. Just don't sit on the fence too long.

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14 minutes ago, Admiral C said:

In any job, even yours, one reaches a point where much of the "newness" and it's excitement begins to wear off. Then it becomes much more "job like"....with good things and not so good things. This is when people then begin to question that job choice. This I think is the crossroads you are reaching, and I think it is quite important. I have known many providers, quite a few personally and pretty well.  While some ladies just do this between RW jobs, or as college co-eds, many ladies mislead themselves that..."they are just going to do this for a year or two".......or 5....or 10....or 20. The HAPPIEST and most successful ladies BY FAR, are those who make a solid decision that they ARE choosing this as a career. Then, they fully apply professional approaches and attitudes to all aspects....Advertising....money management.....self regeneration.....policies.....etc. Just don't sit on the fence too long.

Thank you for your insight.... I love the people I've met and I love what I do... Sometimes we just have "bad days" .... Happens in any line of work💋

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1 hour ago, Bella Marie said:

What is a person if not a person of their word.....

The Bard said it best. "Into thine own self be true."

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Bella everyday is a fresh new start. Yesterday is the past now is the time to write/reflect/learn as you move forward. Best thing to note is that you are not doing this alone (even if it feels that way).

Look around...yep we are all here with you!!😁😌😍😘😳

 

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Best revenge in life is living life well!

 

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7 hours ago, Kali Sensual Reiki said:

Bella everyday is a fresh new start. Yesterday is the past now is the time to write/reflect/learn as you move forward. Best thing to note is that you are not doing this alone (even if it feels that way).

Look around...yep we are all here with you!!😁😌😍😘😳

 

I know this now.... I can feel it💋💝💋💞

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10 hours ago, Bella Marie said:

What is a person if not a person of their word.....

  Then we move on to a lady that is.

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3 minutes ago, JRWolfe said:

  Then we move on to a lady that is.

💋

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On 7/25/2017 at 9:48 PM, Bit Banger said:

The Bard said it best. "Into thine own self be true."

No truer words have been spoken....💋

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Yeah...its sad.... Some people are not of their word unfortunately...a clouded mind usually isn't.....

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I hear Padre is a good place to clear your mind.  The beach is always fun.  

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