Lucylucyloveland

ID Rant

131 posts in this topic

I understand the surface emotion of being annoyed when a possible client will not comply with the way I do things, but it's easier for me to deny access than to try to pull teeth. It's not my favorite way to communicate, I would hope everyone is respectful and will decline my company if they feel it's too invasive. I know if I keep after the person who doesn't want to comply, someone will end up compromising their safety. I'd rather not do a  watered down version of screening, it's not fair to either party. 

 

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I require ID when they have no other form of screening, and if they look like they are not quite "of age" yet...even more so. I am already hesitant when I hear a young man on the phone, but when they look the part...they better be ready to be carded. I am like Laci, I have no qualms calling if I get fake bills, get assaulted, etc. This is my business, and I want my clients(and other providers)to know that safety is my top priority.

Not sure what the deal is, but lately some new clients have been a problem...my screening has been tight because of it. I have even hung up on clients that can't read my ads.

xoxo,

Samantha Sheppard

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On 7/16/2017 at 10:58 AM, frankenthaler91 said:

Good girls can, and have turned bad.    I could point out an actual situation of a guy loosing it all because someone he had seen for a couple of years "outted" him.  But that would continue the "outting".  

This is why you never show your ID to a provider. if a provider asks for your ID just move on to the next name on your list. providers can ask for any form of verification they like and we can always politely decline and move on. 

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Wow, some real salty johns in here lol! Let me clarify, when I ask for id, I ask that all info to be covered up except for full name and picture. Also this is the last resort to verifying a potential client if they do not have reputable references or a p4. Doesn't seem too silly of a request if you ask me and honestly as some has said before, if it's a no, then on to the next! I must be in it for the long con if I am going to burn someone at this point! My only bad review was from a drunk, pilled out guy who said I wasn't sl*tty enough for him. Yeesh!! I hate to remember that client :(

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I would say if you're new to the scene and you want to see a lady and she wants to see your pic and name an ID, it's your gamble but if you want to see her you do it because she's probably been in the game longer than you. But what do I know, I'm just a noob...

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19 minutes ago, Lucylucyloveland said:

Wow, some real salty johns in here lol! Let me clarify, when I ask for id, I ask that all info to be covered up except for full name and picture. Also this is the last resort to verifying a potential client if they do not have reputable references or a p4. Doesn't seem too silly of a request if you ask me and honestly as some has said before, if it's a no, then on to the next! I must be in it for the long con if I am going to burn someone at this point! My only bad review was from a drunk, pilled out guy who said I wasn't sl*tty enough for him. Yeesh!! I hate to remember that client :(

That verification is right on the mark if they don't have p411 or solid references.  

You are sexy as hell and have a great reputation...idiots if they don't comply.  

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4 minutes ago, Laci French said:

That verification is right on the mark if they don't have p411 or solid references.  

You are sexy as hell and have a great reputation...idiots if they don't comply.  

Laci I feel the same way about you!

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It has been my experience that all persons have different ways of verifiing seekers. I have only ever required an ID on a two specific occasions. The need for safety and discretion is at an all-time high. So having empathy for the situation is not very difficult. On another note working from home does raise alarming difficulties, I personally wouldn't care to deal with.

Out-Call , incall be safe "Know" who or to whom you are tending too. Providers, if verification is an issue move forward with those who will conform to your process. Seekers same bit, if you don't feel comfortable with your sought out provider then seek another whose verification you will comply with. 

 

 

Edited by Sophia Rodriguez
Typo
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22 hours ago, SultryKitten said:

I require ID when they have no other form of screening .

Samantha Sheppard

 SAM, you have to admit...I gave you a unique  form of identification ; )

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2 hours ago, JRWolfe said:

 SAM, you have to admit...I gave you a unique  form of identification ; )

True that! ;-)

xoxo,

Samantha Sheppard

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On 7/17/2017 at 0:29 PM, Lucy Kitten said:

and just forget about that pesky safety? I don't think complaining about difficulties with screening is the same as whining.

Her system is working as intended. Can I dispel a myth real quick though? ID =/= safety. Too many ways around showing a real one. I'm all in favor of safety. But you're preaching complacency. ID gives an investigator something to look for after something happens. Doesn't do shit for safety. 

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55 minutes ago, jj254 said:

Her system is working as intended. Can I dispel a myth real quick though? ID =/= safety. Too many ways around showing a real one. I'm all in favor of safety. But you're preaching complacency. ID gives an investigator something to look for after something happens. Doesn't do shit for safety. 

It's not a myth. When guys provide information that is real it's absolutely safer. Having and ID for investigators to look for is one of the reasons it provides safety. Unless this is what you do for a living your perspective will be different. Where is the safety in anonymity? There isn't any. There is zero incentive for people to behave when the hide behind false identities. You as a client are more worried about getting outed and I as a provider am more worried about police being able to identify suspects if need be. When you preach anonymity that's the true complacency, that's asking people to rely on third party verification and second hand truths instead of factual information. It's factual that every client that has have ever shorted me or taken advantage of me used a "hobby name" and every client that has happily provided real world information often without even being asked has never shorted me or misbehaved. So this myth isn't really a myth. And again until you're on the other side how do you know? You obviously don't understand why the information is important so you shouldn't speak in absolutes. Relying on real information is not ever complacency. Allowing clients to hide behind fake info is far more dangerous than anyone would really care to admit because it hurts the systems in place. I get it. But I wasn't actually preaching anything it was just an opportunity for you to discredit a very popular and very helpful screening method.

All I was really saying though is that we should really stop trying to hush people when they are making valid complaints about things that involve their safety and it should never be called whining. 

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1 hour ago, Lucy Kitten said:

...

All I was really saying though is that we should really stop trying to hush people when they are making valid complaints about things that involve their safety and it should never be called whining. 

That saw cuts both ways. 

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1 minute ago, Bit Banger said:

That saw cuts both ways. 

LOL that can be applied to literally everything and is becoming a tired tactic on this board. Every time a provider complains here come the guys saying well girls do it too. It's ridiculous. You're not listening to valid complaints if you're just trying force everyone into the both sides mentality. It's a tactic meant to silence and it's dumb.

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42 minutes ago, Lucy Kitten said:

LOL that can be applied to literally everything and is becoming a tired tactic on this board.

... It's a tactic meant to silence and it's dumb.

A tired tactic? Are you tired of the truth?

  • The truth is that I've stared into the eyes of someone intent on doing me physical harm during a session. Others have died for picking the wrong lady. 
  • The truth is that women have been harmed, even died, in this situation. 
  • The truth is that most men who can afford this hobby have a great deal more to lose if outed than the ladies.  Though less likely to do jail time. 
  • The truth is that I've been shorted (C&D) at sessions.
  • The truth is that escorts have been short changed, received counterfeit bills, etc.
  • The truth is that ladies continue to hide behind their pseudonyms, yet insist that the men reveal all. 
  • The truth is that both sides, men & women, whine about these issues. 

I fail to see how pointing out this duality is a tactic meant to silence anyone.  The whining is just venting at the reality of our situation.

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So I have a question this is for the ladies that accept credit cards.. how do you verify it's the gentleman using his own credit card to pay you? Whenever I use my cards I'm also asked for my ID to verify the identity. So again if so many issues with ID being shown, how does this the whole credit card thing work? Just curious is all ..I don't accept credit card so I have no clue

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6 minutes ago, Chrissy said:

So I have a question this is for the ladies that accept credit cards.. how do you verify it's the gentleman using his own credit card to pay you? ...

Chrissy, cash is king!  Though I have used checks to pre-pay known companions for long term arrangements. 

Despite all the hoopla, some of us are more comfortable with sharing our RWI than we let on, in the right circumstances. I would never share my RWI with someone I'm about to meet for the first time. In the other hand there are several ladies that I have introduced to my family.  Once even to my wife 😁(There was a solid cover relationship.)

As for credit transactions, I'll let the ladies who handle them respond, perhaps by PM.

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I agree Cash is King :) and  I see a ton of ladies nationwide and agencies thay accept credit. I wonder how that works? I can see using credit for an online charge but Can't a guy cancel his card right after a session or deny the charge when his monthly statement comes through? How does that charge show up on your bill? I know it can't say "p@#$y collections"  LOL.

PM insight ladies ;)  

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48 minutes ago, Bit Banger said:

A tired tactic? Are you tired of the truth?

  • The truth is that I've stared into the eyes of someone intent on doing me physical harm during a session. Others have died for picking the wrong lady. 
  • The truth is that women have been harmed, even died, in this situation. 
  • The truth is that most men who can afford this hobby have a great deal more to lose if outed than the ladies.  Though less likely to do jail time. 
  • The truth is that I've been shorted (C&D) at sessions.
  • The truth is that escorts have been short changed, received counterfeit bills, etc.
  • The truth is that ladies continue to hide behind their pseudonyms, yet insist that the men reveal all. 
  • The truth is that both sides, men & women, whine about these issues. 

I fail to see how pointing out this duality is a tactic meant to silence anyone.  The whining is just venting at the reality of our situation.

We're not hiding. You want to do me damage you don't need my real name. All you need is my advertising. I put it all out there so my name is irrelevant. My incall is my home so again I am doing way more sharing than you care to admit because it hurts your arguments.

If these topics are so important to you guys why do you wait until ladies complain to speak up? Because it's more fun just to drown out what you don't want to hear? You know what the actual truth is? Those that have the least to lose are the stingiest about screening. THE INDISPUTABLE TRUTH is that providers face far more risk than clients. Far more provides have been harmed than clients. But honestly you're the guy who said it's better to be dead than outed so I don't trust anything you say on this topic because obviously the safety of others isn't really a concern of yours. I can think of four serial killers of the top of my head that killed sex workers but you know men have sooo much more to lose. That is bullshit too. Complete and utter bullshit. We have everything to lose. Our families our jobs our homes. That's incredibly dismissive. But again not surprising from the guy who would rather see a dead hooker than guy outed.

 

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This really has become a circular argument. Great points have been made, but I don't think either side will change the others minds on this one.

We all need to do what we feel is best for our safety. Period.  

 

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27 minutes ago, Lucy Kitten said:

... We have everything to lose. Our families our jobs our homes. ...

 

And the guys don't have the same chips on the table?

There are few female serial killers, and many male serial killers do prey on prostitutes. But you might check out Monster some time. 

27 minutes ago, Lucy Kitten said:

... But again not surprising from the guy who would rather see a dead hooker than guy outed.

 

Please, don't try to put words in my mouth. I have said that for some guys death may be better than being outed because life as they knew it was over. But I have NEVER EVER said that I would rather see a dead hooker than an outed john.

Edited by Bit Banger
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4 hours ago, Lucy Kitten said:

It's not a myth. When guys provide information that is real it's absolutely safer. Having and ID for investigators to look for is one of the reasons it provides safety. Unless this is what you do for a living your perspective will be different. Where is the safety in anonymity? There isn't any. There is zero incentive for people to behave when the hide behind false identities. You as a client are more worried about getting outed and I as a provider am more worried about police being able to identify suspects if need be. When you preach anonymity that's the true complacency, that's asking people to rely on third party verification and second hand truths instead of factual information. It's factual that every client that has have ever shorted me or taken advantage of me used a "hobby name" and every client that has happily provided real world information often without even being asked has never shorted me or misbehaved. So this myth isn't really a myth. And again until you're on the other side how do you know? You obviously don't understand why the information is important so you shouldn't speak in absolutes. Relying on real information is not ever complacency. Allowing clients to hide behind fake info is far more dangerous than anyone would really care to admit because it hurts the systems in place. I get it. But I wasn't actually preaching anything it was just an opportunity for you to discredit a very popular and very helpful screening method.

All I was really saying though is that we should really stop trying to hush people when they are making valid complaints about things that involve their safety and it should never be called whining. 

Very well articulated. I couldn't say it better myself.

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On 7/17/2017 at 9:52 PM, boink36 said:

This is why you never show your ID to a provider. if a provider asks for your ID just move on to the next name on your list. providers can ask for any form of verification they like and we can always politely decline and move on. 

Showing your ID is nuts, as far as I'm concerned.  I would never do it.  I don't have anything against a provider who requires it but I'm with boink36 on this.

You show your ID because you're already there and feel pressured on the spot.
You write a less-than-perfect review.
Provider goes ape-shit on you, blowing up your text messages and threatening to put you on these mysterious online black-lists.
Provider googles your name, adding "Denver" or "Colorado" to the Google search box if your name is a more common one.  There you are on Facebook with a link titled "Married to..." and/or "Works at..." next to your profile.
Be as creative as you want with what happens next, because I mean...really, there's nothing to lose here, right?
 

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7 hours ago, Lucy Kitten said:

It's not a myth. When guys provide information that is real it's absolutely safer. Having and ID for investigators to look for is one of the reasons it provides safety. Unless this is what you do for a living your perspective will be different. Where is the safety in anonymity? There isn't any. There is zero incentive for people to behave when the hide behind false identities. You as a client are more worried about getting outed and I as a provider am more worried about police being able to identify suspects if need be. When you preach anonymity that's the true complacency, that's asking people to rely on third party verification and second hand truths instead of factual information. It's factual that every client that has have ever shorted me or taken advantage of me used a "hobby name" and every client that has happily provided real world information often without even being asked has never shorted me or misbehaved. So this myth isn't really a myth. And again until you're on the other side how do you know? You obviously don't understand why the information is important so you shouldn't speak in absolutes. Relying on real information is not ever complacency. Allowing clients to hide behind fake info is far more dangerous than anyone would really care to admit because it hurts the systems in place. I get it. But I wasn't actually preaching anything it was just an opportunity for you to discredit a very popular and very helpful screening method.

All I was really saying though is that we should really stop trying to hush people when they are making valid complaints about things that involve their safety and it should never be called whining. 

It is a myth. The kinda guy that wants to hurt a provider ain't gonna have any qualms about producing a fake ID. That don't help ladies. AT ALL. It makes them think they're 'safe' cause they got a picture of a driver license. That's a false security. It ain't nothing but a deadman switch. Makes girls complacent. Gonna do more harm than good in the long run. What's it matter to a dead girl if someone's chasing a murderer? She's still dead. 

Safe will be when it's legal. Til then, check references. Read up on their forum posts. Get some self defense stuff nearby. But don't think any ol DL is gonna keep you safe. It ain't nothing. 

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On 7/15/2017 at 5:42 PM, Lucylucyloveland said:

I have more to lose than they do.

Somewhere in Mississippi tonight, Hugh Freeze is vehemently disagreeing with your assessment on the allocation of who has what to lose in this situation.

Plenty of stories of local johns being outed and having their lives ruined. If you give out your real full name or real phone number, you're a complete idiot and not thinking with the right head. As the Hugh Freeze story shows.

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The loud minority is always going to try to speak over the majority Come Honor... In the grand scheme if this industry, providers are vastly more at risk. With safety being the biggest risk. I understand your concern but as a client it is YOUR job to find a provider that is trustworthy, intelligent, discreet and safe.. And not just a hot piece of ass. That is what reviews are for... Screening can and should go both ways. Take the time to talk to a potential provider, feel them out, make sure they have discretion in mind and take this industry seriously. The odds of a well reviewed and trusted provider you've just met using your identity as blackmail are incredibly low. In fact quite laughable. The odds of a new client with no or inadequate screening hurting a provider are high, so much higher than a properly screened client. 

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2 hours ago, jj254 said:

It is a myth. The kinda guy that wants to hurt a provider ain't gonna have any qualms about producing a fake ID. That don't help ladies. AT ALL. It makes them think they're 'safe' cause they got a picture of a driver license. That's a false security. It ain't nothing but a deadman switch. Makes girls complacent. Gonna do more harm than good in the long run. What's it matter to a dead girl if someone's chasing a murderer? She's still dead. 

Safe will be when it's legal. Til then, check references. Read up on their forum posts. Get some self defense stuff nearby. But don't think any ol DL is gonna keep you safe. It ain't nothing. 

Yeah but with an ID the police have a suspect aren't looking for Harry Hobbiest. Make sense? Again you don't get why its useful and its not for you anyways. So who You are you to tell me what works better? You're not seeing clients so how do you know what keeps us safe and what doesn't? You don't so stop pretending that you do.

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On 7/21/2017 at 9:12 PM, Lucy Kitten said:

Yeah but with an ID the police have a suspect aren't looking for Harry Hobbiest. Make sense? Again you don't get why its useful and its not for you anyways. So who You are you to tell me what works better? You're not seeing clients so how do you know what keeps us safe and what doesn't? You don't so stop pretending that you do.

Ain't a doctor. I know not to drink bleach. Suppose you'd wonder who I am to tell folks not to drink bleach, huh? It's elitist bullshit. You're letting your desperate need to be right on the internet blind you. I get it though. Seen plenty of your posts. You're pro-provider, but you define that as necessarily anti-client. Shame, too. You could be a powerful voice for improvement. Problem with self-proclaimed experts is a failure to intake information. You read every client post looking for the flaw, not the message. Gotta break out of that echo chamber. You wanna check IDs? Cool. Run your business how you see fit. Stop telling folks it keeps them safe though. It don't. 

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Lucy...  I get your point and understand, but there are a couple of ways to look at it.   Who has more at risk the lady or the client?   From the client perspective I might find myself face to face with ELLE or a pimp, or a crazy lady who decides that she wants to out me because of a mediocre review, or lack of effort, or whatever.   That's a pretty big risk for me to take and show you who I really am.

What's the lady have to risk?   Well, I could be enormously unclean, diseased, a rapist, or a murderer.   That's a pretty big risk to the lady.  But my perspective is that being outed or arrested is less risky than being murdered, so I tend to give the advantage to the lady.  Now, that's my opinion and many on here will disagree with me and that's their right.

But my risk is nothing to sneeze at and I understand the reluctance of guys to give you their information.  So what is the answer?

In my case, I never see a lady who is not well established with multiple (read 10 or more) reviews.  So she has a reputation to worry about and that reduces the risk of any funny business.   And I use P411 almost exclusively because she now has 20 or more other providers who have said I'm not a rapist or a murderer.    So I've reduced both of our risks.    If she won't accept my ok's because they aren't new enough (I don't hobby nearly as much as I used to), I move on.

In my early days I was asked for my ID several times.   And since I was with a well known provider, I gave it to them.  Would I do so today?   hmmm....  since they are well reviewed and I'm well "reviewed" i don't see the reason for it.   I'd probably walk away as my spidey sense might be tingling.   But again, if I were a new guy or seeing a new girl, that changes the equation.

 

My .02 and worth most of that.

Vic

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5 hours ago, jj254 said:

Ain't a doctor. I know not to drink bleach. Suppose you'd wonder who I am to tell folks not to drink bleach, huh? It's elitist bullshit. You're letting your desperate need to be right on the internet blind you. I get it though. Seen plenty of your posts. You're pro-provider, but you define that as necessarily anti-client. Shame, too. You could be a powerful voice for improvement. Problem with self-proclaimed experts is a failure to intake information. You read every client post looking for the flaw, not the message. Gotta break out of that echo chamber. You wanna check IDs? Cool. Run your business how you see fit. Stop telling folks it keeps them safe though. It don't. 

 

What echo chamber? It was you that decided to start this conversation and use me to bolster your point. There are other ladies here that have said they used IDs feel free to tag them into the conversation. I provided you with reasons why it's useful and you ignored it while also ignoring giving reasons that anonymity is a benefit. And it again it bears repeating, I only replied to you about this I wasn't supporting anything I said it was uncool to call it whining. You started this discussion with your agenda.

The real problem with change is getting the truly complacent to understand. If you don't want to offer an ID that's fine but to defend it with falsehoods it's dishonest. I have no desperate need to be right, entitled to my opinions they same as you are. But you continually ignore factual information. And again if you're not on the other side how do you really understand the process and it's usefulness?

In case of emergency or just the absolute worst case scenario a real name is beyond useful. Providers are already a marginalized demographic and how much time do you think is going to be spent tracking down hobby names and burner phones? You're correct in that IDs don't provide safety, they're flimsy plastic not a shield but the information provided is useful for a variety of reasons. I can't help but repeat myself but if you don't understand the importance or acknowledge the reasons why it works then your statement is false. You're not speaking from experience you're speaking from presumption.

If there is a better way to compromise on the different methods I'm open. Like if screening sites collect real info on clients and give to providers when it's needed for something like going to the police or a serious crime I would support that. It would be easier for all involved but the two systems don't really work together and it's not just limited to TOB and P411 anywhere where reference sites are used you'll see these arguments. I would be interested in people actually offering suggestions.

 

 

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