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Booger-Eating Morons

48 posts in this topic

6 hours ago, pfunk said:

Too many guys think with their dick, and ignore the warning signs. No reviews. Claim to be a porn star, but don't have any links to their work. Are visiting with "friends". Great pics, almost TGTBT, with nothing to show good service. 

You and I are more concerned with having a great time, rather than seeing the visiting "super hottie". That's why we miss the letdowns.

The other explanation, for some guys, is that they are rude morons, and don't even know it. They say stupid stuff, act entitled, and wonder why they get bad service. Again, they don't even realize how insulting they act. 

Are you saying the women you see aren't hot?

Some dudes do think with their dick, just like some shill on the boards hoping for a free/discounted session. C'est la vie, no? If you want to see a light example of what ajot and I were describing, here's a test. For your next 10 sessions, see a lady you've never seen before. Ask each one of them for dirty talk. See how many do/don't, and compare that with their p411 profile. You're not going to match 100% that way. And that's just a small, innocuous request. You can try it with bigger requests. For you, probably ask for dom sessions, since you come across as a natural sub. Then you'll see where the disappointing sessions come from. 

Not everyone hobbies just to have the attention of a woman. Some of us have wider interests. 

-3

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1 hour ago, Buddy Glass said:

Are you saying the women you see aren't hot? Did I say that, or did you just create a straw man argument?

Some dudes do think with their dick, just like some shill on the boards hoping for a free/discounted session. Ahhh, calling me a shill. So creative! (You might want to look up the definition of "shill", though.) C'est la vie, no? If you want to see a light example of what ajot and I were describing, here's a test. For your next 10 sessions, see a lady you've never seen before. Ask each one of them for dirty talk. See how many do/don't, and compare that with their p411 profile. You're not going to match 100% that way. And that's just a small, innocuous request. You can try it with bigger requests. For you, probably ask for dom sessions, since you come across as a natural sub. Ahh. more insults from the newest troll, LOL! Then you'll see where the disappointing sessions come from. I couldn't care less if you have a disappointing session. I appears you've earned 'em. You're claiming they listed it on P411, but then didn't deliver. Boo hoo. That's why we all say YMMV. I guess you think that doesn't apply to you, eh?

Not everyone hobbies just to have the attention of a woman. Some of us have wider interests. If you have  particular kink, or fetish, you want, that's not my concern. I just want a simple GFE appointment. If you want more, maybe you need to cough up some extra dough, rather than whine about not getting what you want; or maybe you're a cheapskate? (see how I used your insult tactic?) 

 

Edited by pfunk
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20 hours ago, Buddy Glass said:

No texting! But the lady texts you after the call goes to voicemail.

^^^^^^^^^This^^^^^^^. It happens all the fucking time. And I can't stand it. Don't put a "no texting" line in your ad, then have my calls go to voicemail (or worse, "this number does not accept voicemail" or "voice mailbox is full"), and then only text me back in response.  Arrghhhh.  

I happen to hate talking on the phone. I would much rather text. And when someone pulls this on me I feel like a dog on a leash (and not in a good way).

Yes, I know the whole "call me first" thing is a type of security check for some women. Whatever. If that is how you run your business, fine. But I can tell you that lately I, and I expect other potential clients, skip over ads that say "No Texting." And I tend to give more attention to ads that explicitly say "please text." Not sure why, but I do.

Edited by pejo
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This guy is just salty because he can't find a provider to put it in his pooper.  He sees toy play and thinks it's on him!!

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5 minutes ago, SpiceInCo said:

This guy is just salty because he can't find a provider to put it in his pooper.  He sees toy play and thinks it's on him!!

Although it's not my thing, why do you find it insulting for men who would enjoy that?

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21 minutes ago, pfunk said:

 

Ah, I remember you now. You're that weirdo that thinks "troll" means someone you disagree with. 

There's nothing trolling about mentioning a particular category of provider has, in my experience, led to disappointing sessions, especially in the context of the conversation I was having with Ajot. I provided you with a sample test you can try for yourself, if you're so inclined.  I'm curious what it is you find to be insulting about being the sub in a sub/dom encounter? And the shill was your buddy who got his post snipped for it. Seriously, try to follow along with the conversation before you jump in. It will help avoid these embarrassing outbursts of yours. As for whining, which part of any of my posts was whining? Please do elaborate. Also, why exactly would I deserve a disappointing session? Please elaborate on that as well. Which part of any of my posts has enraged you to this point? Do explain, because I'm having a hard time understanding the hate and venom you spew all over. However, your personal attacks do violate the board's rules, so hopefully the mods will get on that and you'll leave them out of the inevitably frothy reply.  

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1 hour ago, Buddy Glass said:

Ah, I remember you now. You're that weirdo that thinks "troll" means someone you disagree with. 

There's nothing trolling about mentioning a particular category of provider has, in my experience, led to disappointing sessions, especially in the context of the conversation I was having with Ajot. I provided you with a sample test you can try for yourself, if you're so inclined.  I'm curious what it is you find to be insulting about being the sub in a sub/dom encounter? And the shill was your buddy who got his post snipped for it. Seriously, try to follow along with the conversation before you jump in. It will help avoid these embarrassing outbursts of yours. As for whining, which part of any of my posts was whining? Please do elaborate. Also, why exactly would I deserve a disappointing session? Please elaborate on that as well. Which part of any of my posts has enraged you to this point? Do explain, because I'm having a hard time understanding the hate and venom you spew all over. However, your personal attacks do violate the board's rules, so hopefully the mods will get on that and you'll leave them out of the inevitably frothy reply.  

Since, I think, we both admired J D Salinger, I'll just respond with some quotations:

"You'll find that you're not the first person who was ever confused and frightened and even sickened by human behavior. You're by no means alone on that score, you'll be excited and stimulated to know. Many, many men have been just as troubled morally and spiritually as you are right now. Happily, some of them kept records of their troubles. You'll learn from them — if you want to. Just as someday, if you have something to offer, someone will learn something from you. It's a beautiful reciprocal arrangement. And it isn't education. It's history. It's poetry."

"I am a kind of paranoid in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy."
 

"I'm sick of not having the courage to be an absolute nobody."

" All morons hate it when you call them a moron."         J. D. SALINGER

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Why are you assuming it's something I don't like to do with men? I made a pass at humor, you made an assumption! Even? 

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2 hours ago, Buddy Glass said:

Ah, I remember you now. You're that weirdo that thinks "troll" means someone you disagree with. 

There's nothing trolling about mentioning a particular category of provider has, in my experience, led to disappointing sessions, especially in the context of the conversation I was having with Ajot. I provided you with a sample test you can try for yourself, if you're so inclined.  I'm curious what it is you find to be insulting about being the sub in a sub/dom encounter? And the shill was your buddy who got his post snipped for it. Seriously, try to follow along with the conversation before you jump in. It will help avoid these embarrassing outbursts of yours. As for whining, which part of any of my posts was whining? Please do elaborate. Also, why exactly would I deserve a disappointing session? Please elaborate on that as well. Which part of any of my posts has enraged you to this point? Do explain, because I'm having a hard time understanding the hate and venom you spew all over. However, your personal attacks do violate the board's rules, so hopefully the mods will get on that and you'll leave them out of the inevitably frothy reply.  

Yeah, that "shill" was my filter not working.  I was thinking about the lady as my example and just typed her name.  I'm ok with TPTB snipping her name.  I saw her 2 years ago.  I have no relationship.

But that just reinforces my point: a wonderful provider that I have not seen for two years because pick after pick after pick, I keep having a wonderful time.

And the " 10 new provider " test?  I get to research them first, and pick them on the basis of dirty talking, and then see how many actually talk dirty in session?

I'll take that test and score a ten out of ten.  Easy peasy.  Wanna bet?  My budget will demand that the test takes 10 months, seeing one new girl each month.  After all, I have a couple of favs I have to satisfy.

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5 minutes ago, Laplace said:

Yeah, that "shill" was my filter not working.  I was thinking about the lady as my example and just typed her name.  I'm ok with TPTB snipping her name.  I saw her 2 years ago.  I have no relationship.

But that just reinforces my point: a wonderful provider that I have not seen for two years because pick after pick after pick, I keep having a wonderful time.

And the " 10 new provider " test?  I get to research them first, and pick them on the basis of dirty talking, and then see how many actually talk dirty in session?

I'll take that test and score a ten out of ten.  Easy peasy.  Wanna bet?  My budget will demand that the test takes 10 months, seeing one new girl each month.  After all, I have a couple of favs I have to satisfy.

+1000

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Three words. Thank you, Laplace!

xoxo,

Samantha Sheppard

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18 hours ago, pfunk said:

Since, I think, we both admired J D Salinger, I'll just respond with some quotations:

"I'm sick of not having the courage to be an absolute nobody."

" All morons hate it when you call them a moron."         J. D. SALINGER

I know this wasn't directed at me, but I hate Salinger's Catcher for being the whiny entitled bitch that everyone is blaming millennials for being decades after the book was written. 

-The purpose of being on here and not using your real name is to absolutely be nobody.

-While Trump hates it more than most, I doubt anybody likes when you shit in their tea.

17 hours ago, Laplace said:

And the " 10 new provider " test?  I get to research them first, and pick them on the basis of dirty talking, and then see how many actually talk dirty in session?

I'll take that test and score a ten out of ten.  Easy peasy.  Wanna bet?  My budget will demand that the test takes 10 months, seeing one new girl each month.  After all, I have a couple of favs I have to satisfy.

I'd be very interested in you coming back and providing the results of this. Dirty talk, or kissing, or the best is normally something like taking pics. Just something that they post on their account and ads and then are pretty much absolutely not for (and I don't think you should just try to win like you might fudge the numbers in golf, a single "ooo ya, harder" or something like that should not be that bar to pass haha).

I just want to see more providers in line with what they advertise. I may skip or I may see you knowing that they do or don't do something, but it still feels bad when its supposed to be GFE and kissing, and all there is is a peck on the cheek!

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I realized from first reading this post that I need to get my border collie out more often...........

Edited by parkercole
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3 hours ago, ajot said:

I just want to see more providers in line with what they advertise. I may skip or I may see you knowing that they do or don't do something, but it still feels bad when its supposed to be GFE and kissing, and all there is is a peck on the cheek!

As I've said elsewhere in this thread, it's common knowledge that your mileage will vary.

I've visited girls who advertise GFE, and avoid kissing me. However, other reviewers note they received DFK. I've visited girls who say they like dirty talk, and they do, as long as I'm the one doing it! Unfortunately, the reviews I wrote, on those experiences, disappeared when Sowet, and TOB, upgraded years ago. Course, the girls are gone anyway.

No one has the same experience. That's just the way it is. It could be that you look like her brother. Your cologne bothers her. She hates the way you kiss. Your questions make her uncomfortable. Your voice annoys her. Anything could be off-putting. Obviously, it's happened to me.

Hopefully, as time goes by, you become more adept at choosing girls you click with, and avoiding those you don't. :)

 

 

Edited by pfunk
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I haven't read all of the conversation in this thread but the first five were quite comedic 😂😂😂😂😂

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On Wednesday, March 09, 2016 at 7:33 AM, Laplace said:

Yeah, Mister.  I'm probably talking about you.  A typical ad viewing session by the BEMs who walk among us, after a long day of shovelling shit at the manure factory:

<fap fap fap fap fap>  "oooooh geeze look suzy's got new tit pics up!"  <fap fap fap fap fap> "ooooh geeze look at her ass!" <fap fap fap fap fap> "oooh look shes got a 250 special up!"  <goes through wife's purse and finds 220....adds ten crumpled ones from his own pocket> "YES!"  <BEEP BEEP BOOP BEEP BOOP BOOP BEEP BOOP BOOP BEEP>    {editors note: what follows could just as easily occur via text or email}

Suzy: <best slightly breathy and sexy yet professional voice> "Hello!"

BEM: <fap fap fap fap fap> "Hey"

Suzy: "May I help you?"

BEM: <fap fap fap fap fap>  "Yeah! You busy tonight?"

Suzy: "I might have an opening" <giggles> "What time were you interested in?"

BEM: <fapfapfapfapfapfapfap> "Do you do blowjobs? I really want a blowjob!  No Condom!"

Suzy: <facepalm....but continues on doggedly> "What time were you wanting?  And do you have references?"

BEM: <fap fap fap fap fap> "Yeah, I got references."

Suzy: <idly doodling with her free hand...it's a stick man> "Can you give me their names and contact info?  And what time were you interested in?

BEM: <fap fap fap fap fap> "Saw her on Back page last year.  Ivanna something.  Whats your address?  I could probaby be there in 15 minutes!!" <FAPFAPFAPFAPFAPFAP>

Suzy: <draws a large knife in the head of the stickman>

 

Gentlemen, lets review a typical ad. Together. Pick one. I know that you want to linger on those boobs, legs, and asses that appear at the top of the ad.  But, there's more!  Really! If you look down below the pictures, you will see a bunch of funny-looking marks.  These marks are called "WRITING."  Writing was invented by the human race so that we could convey thoughts and ideas, and leave them in a permanent place, for other human beings to understand them.  YES!!!  It's true!

All those funny looking marks? That lady is actually trying to tell you something about herself.  You may like what she has to say! You may not!  You should stay away from the ladies who write things you don't like.  This is called "being a wise consumer."

Look further into her "writing."  There you will find something called "instructions."  Instructions are a secret code that the lady has placed into her ad.  On purpose!  This secret code, when followed carefully, will actually result in your meeting with the same lady in the pictures.  You will probably even be able to place your peepee.....your very own real live weiner!.....into her mouth or vagina.  And she will SMILE! Seriously!  Dude.....it's happened to me!  All you have to do is look at her "instructions" and learn how to follow them!  It's like a treasure hunt!

Give it a try!

 

Now, we have seen a lot of guys post stuff about liking ladies, and maybe the ladies liking them (or not) back.  Some have complained about having to "please" a lady.  Others complain about not being able to "please" a lady.

Dudes!  Seriously! Look at what the lady likes. Remember? It is in those funny marks beneath the pictures of her tits.  Yeah!  The writing!  Other guys have written stuff about the lady, too!

But here's where it gets hard.  This is why ordinary looking guys like me have wonderful hot, sexy, sessions time and time again, while you are still hung up on whether or not she should like her, or bother to try and make her cum.

 

I think.  I have a doctorate in thinkology. So when I read what a lady has written about herself, or others have written about her, I put it all together AND I THINK ABOUT IT! YES!  Thinking about the stuff in all this writing BEFORE I call a lady actually gives me better, hotter, and more frequent sex than most of the poor, dumb, sons-o-bitches that seem to stumble around this place like drooling zombies!

For example,  I LIKE trying to make ladies cum. Whether or not I am good at it is a secret the ladies will take to their graves. So, I read.  When a lady starts an entire thread about how she didn't get to cum because the guy popped in a BJ.....this lady is using "writing" to convey an idea.  I think about it.  This lady likes to cum.  I like to make ladies cum.  This might be a good lady to call.  If you don't like making ladies cum and just want to bust a nut, this would be a bad lady to see. See how thinking works?

Another example.  I prefer to have sex with ladies I like. It really helps if I think they like me, too.  So, I read.  If a lady uses "writing" to convey the idea that she likes to form "connections," I think about it. She would be a good lady to see.  If you don't like the idea of a provider showing real or feigned attraction for you, or will obsess over whether it IS real or feigned, this would be a bad lady to see. See how thinking works?

Reading.  Thinking.

All you booger-eating morons should give it a try once in a while.

OMG I just peed myself!!! I don't go on the forums much at all but tonight I was curious and I happened to stumble on this gem. Hahahaha I'M DEAD!! It's like I wrote this!

*Applauses*

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On 3/11/2016 at 2:00 PM, pfunk said:

As I've said elsewhere in this thread, it's common knowledge that your mileage will vary.

No one has the same experience. 

Hopefully, as time goes by, you become more adept at choosing girls you click with, and avoiding those you don't. :)

It is a bit annoying though! Though I also understand the providers view sometimes. I have a gal that would monopolize me if she'd do a bit different. She advertised GFE once, changed it but told me that she has been annoyed at the guys that list DFK in reviews because she will NOT (and would not) do more than a quick peck for a kiss.

Sad cause she's great! But I just keep moving on haha. 

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On 3/11/2016 at 2:00 PM, pfunk said:

I've visited girls who say they like dirty talk, and they do, as long as I'm the one doing it!

Thanks for the belly laugh!!!!

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