Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0
meganrae28

Would you kill for me?

20 posts in this topic

I'm working my lame job today so I won't have any male callers. I am mildly panicked, that I woke up to some unidentifiable bug in the corner of my large bedroom. I need it dead. Like, I don't even want to get close enough to determine its phylum. Looks like some kind of Preying Mantis, yeah and I spelled that wrong because it looks like freaking killer! And it has a big ass. OMG! What if it is about to have babies.

If you were here. Would you kill for me? What kind of bugs and pests would you not kill? Where do you draw the line with your BFE services? I just lost a BFE so clearly I need some education here. Is expecting him to kill a fly or a centipede ok? Bat too much?

Yeah I know I'm making my bedroom sound like it could be on an episode of Hoarders but I assure bugs are rare. Rare but so fucking gross. I'm going into another room now.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would Megan. I am getting quite adept at bug killing these days. LOl Oh, and Windex is the bug kill all. You can stand back from a distance, and spray. Hopefully someone gets him for you. ewwww. lol:p

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

To answer your question, yes I would squish the sucker for ya. Lol, might be a good idea to squish him now that you can see him.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would do a lot of things for you Megan, but I am not a killer. I would certainly, without hesitation, relocate the creature to another zip code.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I usually just put them outside. Especially if it's the kind of bug that eats other nastier bugs.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I would do a lot of things for you Megan, but I am not a killer. I would certainly, without hesitation, relocate the creature to another zip code.

+1, or at least outside. :rolleyes:

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If it's a Preying Mantis, he's no threat to you, as scary as he seems. I would glady move him to the outside for you....he just wants to get back to his home too ;).

Now if he was a threat, (Black Widow's and Wasp's are not my friends), the gloves are off, it's killin' time. Get the Windex out, it's gonna get messy :P.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Bugs aren't gross. Most of them are pretty amazing little creatures. If I was your BFE I would be happy to capture it and relocate it to a new home. I do draw the line at anything that can kill me. For those you'll have to call a professional service.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If prepared properly, many bugs can be delicious and a high source in protein. I would recommend a light beer batter (maybe a Guiness) and butter in a wok. Whether it should be paired with a white or red depends on the ambiance of your dining room, and personal preference.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You can cheer up if it's a Praying Mantis because that "makes an awesome choice for a pet" according to: http://www.wikihow.com/Take-Care-of-a-Praying-Mantis. You've already done Part 1, finding it, now you can move on to #2 housing, #3 feeding, on up to #5 "Handling the mantis", "handle with care" (not to protect yourself, to avoid injuring your pet!) but "don't be afraid to pet your mantis". I bet you're really looking forward to that!

Mantis activities: Try watching TV with your pet if you can find a rerun of "Space Ghost Coast to Coast" (a superhero - talk show - parody - cartoon that featured mantis-like creature Zorak as the band leader). Or (see message #7 from mmpphh) train your praying mantis to hand you some of the rewards of its preying (other tasty insects), rather than consuming its prey all by itself.

if I still haven't convinced you to adopt it, I would remove it if I visited. I would attempt capture & release rather than kill, because less messy and (if it really is a mantis) mantises are good to have around, they eat bugs that eat your garden plants. Of course, with the outside temperature where it is today, you could also turn off the heat and open all the windows to the room where it's located, that should soon slow it down enough to make it easy to catch.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would gladly kill any bug. Bugs belong anywhere but in the house!!!

I am even more than willing to get rid of mice and bats if thats what is needed.

The one thing I can do is snakes, maybe I am being a sissy but snakes give me the creeps.:D

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Bugs, bats, mice, snakes, assorted vermin: they all have their place, but like everyone else they should not linger in your abode if not wanted. I would be happy to assist you at any time in removing unwanted guests in the most appropriate way, by escorting them (by force if need be) to the door. On the other hand, the penalty for trespass should not be death (besides, it makes a mess). Having lived just about everywhere west of the Mississippi for more years than seems possible, I have removed just about everything you can imagine -- snakes are actually easy: they actually want to go outside, scorpions are the worst, they just don't understand rejection at all. My escort-to-the-door fee is reasonable: a few moments of your time engaged in activities we find mutually consensual. :D

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You didn't save the number of the guy who wanted to trade you a skateboard?!?! What the hell is wrong with you? He probably would have done anything you asked him to for a hand job. sheeesh!

tee heee....big ass! :P

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

...would not placing the beast outside, in these conditions, constitute a death penalty....

...a harsh, numbing death sentence me thinks.....

...last week, not so much....

:D

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Kill 'em all. Sort them out after they are dead. I have no pre conceived intentions. Bugs gone, I'm out, realizing this is a late post....

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would relocate the little guy for you, and I would not ask for any "payment" in return.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My rule of thumb is that whenever possible, I try to get the beastie out the door and back into nature -- especially spiders (who will go out & kill other beasties.) I am not a fan of insects with one exception: Daddy Long Legs. They will go out and kill the spiders who I shooed out to kill the other bugs.

So, sadly, no killing for you, M.R., but I would re-locate.

I'm working my lame job today so I won't have any male callers. I am mildly panicked, that I woke up to some unidentifiable bug in the corner of my large bedroom. I need it dead. Like, I don't even want to get close enough to determine its phylum. Looks like some kind of Preying Mantis, yeah and I spelled that wrong because it looks like freaking killer! And it has a big ass. OMG! What if it is about to have babies.

If you were here. Would you kill for me? What kind of bugs and pests would you not kill? Where do you draw the line with your BFE services? I just lost a BFE so clearly I need some education here. Is expecting him to kill a fly or a centipede ok? Bat too much?

Yeah I know I'm making my bedroom sound like it could be on an episode of Hoarders but I assure bugs are rare. Rare but so fucking gross. I'm going into another room now.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0