Giving Out Personal Information

[Guest Outlook2013]

Hi all, I am new to TOB so I am sorry if this has already been covered. I am also fairly new to being a hobbyist. I had a provider that I saw once without giving her any personal information. She has now moved on and I am looking to find someone new to spend my time with. I am nervous about giving out too much personal information, as with most hobbyist if my habit is discovered I have a lot to lose. I know you providers are doing what you can in order to feel safe and secure with who you spend your time with. I am asking veteran hobbyists, would you give out the following information? Ladies your feedback is also welcome. Thanks.

First & last name

Name of Business

Business number

Web site of business

Position in company

Best number to contact you

[inkspot]

No, No, No, No, No, Yes

[NaughtyNiceGuy]

Ditto to what Inkspot said.

[urfan]

hey outlook,

as a relative newcomer, your best bet might be p411. although i'm not that familiar with it, my impression is they require a lot of the info you listed.

your other alternative is the 'tried and true' advice - stick with well-reviewed providers here and give them the screening info they request. once you're a known quantity, your anxiety should be relieved - as well as other things - lol

[2Big]

Give out a number to contact you. Depending on your social situation, this might be your regular phone, or a second phone, or a trac fone, etc.

Never ever give out any personal information, including but not limited to: real first, last name, job title, company you work for, etc. If a provider asks for this, chuckle, and move on.

[lewd5050]

I always use my real first name when contacting a lady. I've never been asked for the other things you listed but I done think I wouldgive out that info. Some ladies I've met know some of these things after meeting me, and one lady knows all these and much more, she comes to my home and I trust her completely.

[angela aspen]

Freaking out dudes in the screening process is the number one way to kill the providers biz... wait... there is a LONG list of ways to kill biz. The screening process should not be scary... thats a rookie move on her part. There are many ways to screen a dude without freaking the dude out. Have her contact me for new 2013 screening methods.

[geecue2]

First & last name -First name yes

Name of Business-No

Business number-No

Web site of business-No

Position in company-No

Best number to contact you -Yes

[irisheyes]

Pretty much agree with everyone here. First name, usually, unless I want to change it up and go with an alter-ego, last name never, name of business, never, business number, never, website of business, never, position in company, never, and best number to contact me, yes. Hope all of this is helping you out. If they ever ask you for that information, move on to the others who don't.

[Lovely_Leigh]

I understand your concern for not wanting to share your personal info. My name is not really Leigh so I get it. On the flip side, if an individual is willing to share his personal info I am typically put at ease. To me, it means he's not going to try any funny business. Why would someone do something horrid to me when I can direct the cops quickly in his direction? I'm not saying this is foolproof but in my opinion it makes a difference. Conversely, I encourage new guys to use me as a reference because I don't think it's wise to share personal info with every provider one wants to see. So to answer your question: I would research a few reputable providers and share my info with them and if the session goes well I would ask if I could use them as a reference. That will get your foot in the door. P411 is also a great tool for both the ladies as well as the gents. Happy hobbying.

[boink36]

Hi all, I am new to TOB so I am sorry if this has already been covered. I am also fairly new to being a hobbyist. I had a provider that I saw once without giving her any personal information. She has now moved on and I am looking to find someone new to spend my time with. I am nervous about giving out too much personal information, as with most hobbyist if my habit is discovered I have a lot to lose. I know you providers are doing what you can in order to feel safe and secure with who you spend your time with. I am asking veteran hobbyists, would you give out the following information? Ladies your feedback is also welcome. Thanks.

First & last name

Name of Business

Business number

Web site of business

Position in company

Best number to contact you

I get tired of posting this so I will link to it this time.

http://www.theotherboard.com/forums/showthread.php?p=348467#post348467

[pitbull]

It's a damn interesting topic for us newbies, and no doubt tiresome for the veterans. I get that.

There is truly a disconnect here. Seems that at least one provider must simply take a chance and essentially do NO screening whatsoever. From there, the newbie can build references and continue his anonymous hobbying. That's about it, eh?

And yet, we have hobbyists such as pfunk who says he has given out everything for years just short of his social security number with no problems. Do hobbyists fear a financial shakedown along the lines of: Give me money or I tell your wife? Just curious.

And since I think it's on the topic of "giving out personal information," do the super secretive hobbyists make a point of parking far away to make their license plates difficult to see? Again, I hope it's on topic.

[boink36]

It's a damn interesting topic for us newbies, and no doubt tiresome for the veterans. I get that.

There is truly a disconnect here. Seems that at least one provider must simply take a chance and essentially do NO screening whatsoever. From there, the newbie can build references and continue his anonymous hobbying. That's about it, eh?

And yet, we have hobbyists such as pfunk who says he has given out everything for years just short of his social security number with no problems. Do hobbyists fear a financial shakedown along the lines of: Give me money or I tell your wife? Just curious.

And since I think it's on the topic of "giving out personal information," do the super secretive hobbyists make a point of parking far away to make their license plates difficult to see? Again, I hope it's on topic.

You show up with your real license plates on your car?

[Guest hgritstoo]

It's a damn interesting topic for us newbies, and no doubt tiresome for the veterans. I get that.

There is truly a disconnect here. Seems that at least one provider must simply take a chance and essentially do NO screening whatsoever. From there, the newbie can build references and continue his anonymous hobbying. That's about it, eh?

And yet, we have hobbyists such as pfunk who says he has given out everything for years just short of his social security number with no problems. Do hobbyists fear a financial shakedown along the lines of: Give me money or I tell your wife? Just curious.

And since I think it's on the topic of "giving out personal information," do the super secretive hobbyists make a point of parking far away to make their license plates difficult to see? Again, I hope it's on topic.

It's spot on topic. I gave personal info to the first two ladies I saw. Probably more than I should have......but I got tired of all the turn aways. According to the veterans on this board, I'm an idiot. Maybe so. But I could never find these ladies that all the guys are saying don't screen. Even the "newbie friendly" ones asked for personal info. If the veterans really want to be helpful to newbies.....maybe they should provide a list.

I know....no shilling.

As for me, I did research and selected a provider with a very good reputation. I understand that she could have been Lorena Bobbit in disguise.....but she wasn't.

So. Who wants to address Pitbulls most excellent question above? If a provider wants to get the goods on a client, it's pretty easy. Do you have a facebook page? Did you take the bus?Are you seeing her in YOUR hotel room? Did you leave your wallet in your pants while you took a leak? I'm sure there are more possibilities that haven't occurred to me

[pfunk]

And yet, we have hobbyists such as pfunk who says he has given out everything for years just short of his social security number with no problems.

This ^^^^^ is true. Now I have P411 so no one asks.

I would wager that less than one, in a thousand, clients ever experience any blackmail, outing, or extortion. (It would suck to be that guy, I'll agree.) However, get a hobby phone, cuz you will get texts and calls soliciting business (pretty rare, though).

You can take 2Bigs advice, or follow hgritstoo's example. That's your decision.

[NaughtyNiceGuy]

If I am not wrong, pfunk is single and self employed so his level of risk is probably a lot less than the majority of the johns on here that are married and have an employer. Give out whatever you want but don't be surprised if it comes back to haunt you.

[flipper]

Based on the consensus above it would seem like p411 is risky as well, but I agree that breaking in as a newbie is a little tough without it. I'm going through my second round of being a "newbie" and it's much harder to get the women I'm interested in to see me than it was 5 or 6 years ago.

[pfunk]

If I am not wrong, pfunk is single and self employed so his level of risk is probably a lot less than the majority of the johns on here that are married and have an employer. Give out whatever you want but don't be surprised if it comes back to haunt you.

Both happened in the last 5 years. Prior to that I was in the same boat as any married, employed guy. By the way, this thread is not about me, or you. It's about answering the OPs question.

In 25 years, NOT ONE GIRL has ever tried to extort me, out me, ruin my relationship, or mess with my employment. I'll bet you don't know anyone who has had it happen. Very, very few do.

[NaughtyNiceGuy]

There has been more than one john that has posted on here about be outed. I just don't care enough to search the threads. Any information you give out can be used to hurt you. It only takes one bad experience. I have had more than one provider that would have used that information against me if they had it for writing less than favorable reviews.

[pitbull]

Both happened in the last 5 years. Prior to that I was in the same boat as any married, employed guy. By the way, this thread is not about me, or you. It's about answering the OPs question.

In 25 years, NOT ONE GIRL has ever tried to extort me, out me, ruin my relationship, or mess with my employment. I'll bet you don't know anyone who has had it happen. Very, very few do.

I have exchanged PM messages with an experienced hobbyist who felt threatened in this manner. I don't know the nature of the threat, but sounded pretty bad. I agree the odds are probably really low, but fucking miserable if it happened to you.

As a strictly FBSM guy, I gave out virtually the kitchen sink to one well reviewed ASP with no problems. I did not end up seeing her, but she graciously agreed to see me. Why wouldn't she? She knew everything about me. Knowing what I know now, I guess I would not do that.

And some TOBers wonder why I and other men go to AMPs? Total anonymity. Although that pesky license plate problem could conceivably come up, and that is loaded with "personal information." However, it's hard to imagine mamasan coming out and writing down plate numbers. I suppose the cops could do that. Perish the thought. Truly.

[pitbull]

Both happened in the last 5 years. Prior to that I was in the same boat as any married, employed guy. By the way, this thread is not about me, or you. It's about answering the OPs question.

In 25 years, NOT ONE GIRL has ever tried to extort me, out me, ruin my relationship, or mess with my employment. I'll bet you don't know anyone who has had it happen. Very, very few do.

I have exchanged PM messages with an experienced hobbyist who felt threatened in this manner. I don't know the nature of the threat, but sounded pretty bad. I agree the odds are probably really low, but fucking miserable if it happened to you.

As a strictly FBSM guy, I gave out everything and the kitchen sink to one well reviewed ASP with no problems. I did not end up seeing her, but she graciously agreed to see me. Why wouldn't she? She knew everything about me. Knowing what I know now, I guess I would not do that.

And some TOBers wonder why I and other men go to AMPs? Total anonymity. Although that pesky license plate problem could conceivably come up, and that is loaded with "personal information." However, it's hard to imagine mamasan coming out and writing down plate numbers. I suppose the cops could do that. Perish the thought. Truly.

[oldguysrule45]

It is sooo easy to find any info on anyone today, why go thru the anxiety of worrying about it. If you have so much to lose, you are in the wrong hobby. Agree with the P411 advice. Only see well established ladies, but that is no guarantee. There have been several threads on here about well established ladies getting pissed off and threatening someone with exposure.

[BigHorse]

I would not provide any personal information-it would be crazy to do so. More power to those who are brave and provide such information.

I sent an appointment request via P411 to a well established provider. She said P411 is one method of verification and asked for my first name, last name, employment... etc so she could feel safe. I said, no thank you and never contacted her again.

[Guest KCinCOS]

I have to say - my hobbying experience is in Kansas City, where it's more circumstance and location that determines your ability to "get in" - but I'll tell you, I give away my first name, and phone number.

I've found if you hustle (which is part of the fun, right?) you can get in - I look at it no differently than approaching a woman at a bar, just with different criteria, and a much more clear end game.

My recommendation - either hit a hotel NO ONE knows has a sting going on, or try an apartment/house.

I, personally, have never done incall, because i have too much to loose myself.

[Lovely_Leigh]

Both happened in the last 5 years. Prior to that I was in the same boat as any married, employed guy. By the way, this thread is not about me, or you. It's about answering the OPs question.

In 25 years, NOT ONE GIRL has ever tried to extort me, out me, ruin my relationship, or mess with my employment. I'll bet you don't know anyone who has had it happen. Very, very few do.

Thank you! We all know an alcoholic/addict or a homosexual person and those are both about 10% of the population. How many people know a person who was blackmailed in the hobby? I know it happens but I don't think it's as prevalent as some perpetuate. I understand covering ones bases but I don't think this is an issue one should lose sleep over. Join P411 or pick a few reputable provider to see with the thought that they will open the door via references. If you're still too paranoid, I would suggest frisbee golf. You can still get a hole in one, it's just less satisfying.

[2Big]

I'm single and not volunteering in my local church group, so I don't really care about being "outed". A girl threatened me once, I called her bluff. Never heard from her again. Plus, I don't consider banging a hooker a morality issue. I kind of follow the advice of ex Louisiana Governor Edwin Edwards: everything is ok as long as you're caught in bed with a live boy or a dead girl.

[booblover099]

I'm single and not volunteering in my local church group, so I don't really care about being "outed". A girl threatened me once, I called her bluff. Never heard from her again. Plus, I don't consider banging a hooker a morality issue. I kind of follow the advice of ex Louisiana Governor Edwin Edwards: everything is ok as long as you're caught in bed with a live boy or a dead girl.

You did mean "not" caught in bed with a boy or a corpse - right?

[booblover099]

You show up with your real license plates on your car?

Unless you can get Mr. Spock to beam you into your hooker's hotel room, there is really no possiblity for total anonymity during the trip - there is just too much surveillance around these days. It seems that Big Brother is here to stay. And even if teleportation was possible, you'd probably need a credit card and a driver's license...

[iaughn]

I still don't understand how someone can be verified without giving out some personal information.

I guess this is a question for the providers. What info do you ask for, that you can verify someone with, but doesn't scare most guys off?

I always use P411 myself, and have never been asked for anything else. But I'm happy to give some more information, if it makes the provider more comfortable with me.

I'm single and comfortable with how I live my life. And there is no one in my life that would care or doesn't already know.

[Ghost_Rider]

Only once have I ever given out more then my phone # (I was screening with an agency who I never ended up using) and they actually ended up calling me back at work (ackward ). Anyway, the point is, if you don't feel comfortable giving out your info. don't, just move on, because the other 99.9% of ladies won't even ask for more then your contact #.

Welcome...and Happy Hobbying .