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Guest hgritstoo

Blacklisting

30 posts in this topic

I've been at the hobby for only a year, and I'm still wet behind the ears. However, you only learn things by asking....so here goes.

Mention was made of "the blacklist" in another thread. I understand the need to share information beteeen the ladies about potentially dangerous clients, so I support the general idea. The only two rules I know about are 1) An angry provider can place a client on the blacklist and 2) The client is never allowed to know why he is on the list....or even that he IS on the list. Sounds very much like the rules of my first marriage.

What is there to stop a provider from retaliating against a client who gave a bad review?

Is all info about clients, good and bad, shared among the providers? Personal screening info as well?

I know a lot of the guys on the forum don't seem too concerned about things like this, and I'm also curious as to where that confidence comes from. I was raised in a family where the women were pretty much revered. You treated them with respect......and you never, ever, hit them. In return, they did not abuse their position. So, I may be viewed as sorta wimpy by the more testosterone-fueled among us.

Don't want to stir up any fights. And forgive me if I've just "farted in church." I'm just a newbie suddenly considering an aspect of the hobby I had not given much thought to.

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Just like with ASP reviews, it is up to the reader of a blacklist report to consider the source and the info presented.

The amount of personal info varies by report and by site, and most sites aren't accessible to the general public(NBL being at least a partial exception).

Bottom line:

Don't act like an ass, and unless you cross a really vindictive ASP, you really don't have much to worry about.

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The reference to farting in church made me LOL!:D

As far as the black list goes, Mr. Reindeer is correct when he says that it is up to the reader to consider the source. Yes, obviously a mad provider can blacklist if she so chooses to, but we as providers are aware of that and we take each report with a grain of salt. There are PLENTY of providers that do not even have access to the blacklist sites, nor do they care to and there is also a wealth of providers that do not read reports on the blacklist at all. If I were you, I would not worry too much about that silly site. Just behave as a gentleman and you will do fine.:)

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I can't speak for the ladies, but I'm sure they view the blacklist forums as not the gospel, but just a tool in their arsenal. Just like you may see a lady who has questionable reviews, ladies may see the gent if the reason he is on the blacklist is not dangerous, jealous provider etc...jmo

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Basically if three or more handles call a fuck a Fucktard... He's a Fucktard.

So.... DOnt be a Fucktard to more than 2.5 girls

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Unfortunately it does happen that an 'angry" provider puts up a false report. I have seen ladies get upset over the dumbest things & put up bad reports...or in hopes of keeping a wealthy client all to themself...I usually go with my instinct first & can usually tell when some reports are false. I have seen SEVERAL guys who had "bad" reports...just because the report didn't sound right or match up. After seeing the guy for my self I usually go back & add my experience to the report....letting other ladies know this guy is safe to see!

I've been at the hobby for only a year, and I'm still wet behind the ears. However, you only learn things by asking....so here goes.

Mention was made of "the blacklist" in another thread. I understand the need to share information beteeen the ladies about potentially dangerous clients, so I support the general idea. The only two rules I know about are 1) An angry provider can place a client on the blacklist and 2) The client is never allowed to know why he is on the list....or even that he IS on the list. Sounds very much like the rules of my first marriage.

What is there to stop a provider from retaliating against a client who gave a bad review?

Is all info about clients, good and bad, shared among the providers? Personal screening info as well?

I know a lot of the guys on the forum don't seem too concerned about things like this, and I'm also curious as to where that confidence comes from. I was raised in a family where the women were pretty much revered. You treated them with respect......and you never, ever, hit them. In return, they did not abuse their position. So, I may be viewed as sorta wimpy by the more testosterone-fueled among us.

Don't want to stir up any fights. And forgive me if I've just "farted in church." I'm just a newbie suddenly considering an aspect of the hobby I had not given much thought to.

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Basically if three or more handles call a fuck a Fucktard... He's a Fucktard.

So.... DOnt be a Fucktard to more than 2.5 girls

LOL. So much to keep track of!

(taking notes: don't.......be.......a.......)

raises hand.

I don't think fucktard is in the hobby glossary?

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Thanks to all for responding. I will follow Destiny's advice and strive to be a gentleman.

But one question still remains: I'm sure the FBI has a dossier on every guy who posts on this forum. What about the ASP union local chapter?:eek:

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Unfortunately it does happen that an 'angry" provider puts up a false report. I have seen ladies get upset over the dumbest things & put up bad reports...or in hopes of keeping a wealthy client all to themself...I usually go with my instinct first & can usually tell when some reports are false. I have seen SEVERAL guys who had "bad" reports...just because the report didn't sound right or match up. After seeing the guy for my self I usually go back & add my experience to the report....letting other ladies know this guy is safe to see!

Your post seems to suggest that a file exists on clients somewhere, and that other ASPs can contribute to it? My paranoia level is rising.......

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First of all...all of these are private....its not like someone can google you & find it. Second if the fact that we can add to it make's you paranoid....maybe thats because your behavior has caused this?

I hope thats not the case....as long as you stay true to being a gentleman you should have no worries....1 or 2 phycho's can't ruin a good reputation that easily!!

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Wow Reindeer, I actually agree with you.:)

Am seconding Holly's agreement with Reindeer.

As far as a lady blacklisting a client over a bad review or out of spite would like to tell you it never happens would also like to say a bad review has never been written on a lady out out of spite for what ever reason.

As Destiny said you have to take what's there with a grain of salt.

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Basically if three or more handles call a fuck a Fucktard... He's a Fucktard.

So.... DOnt be a Fucktard to more than 2.5 girls

I like Angela more with each post.

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First of all...all of these are private....its not like someone can google you & find it. Second if the fact that we can add to it make's you paranoid....maybe thats because your behavior has caused this?

I hope thats not the case....as long as you stay true to being a gentleman you should have no worries....1 or 2 phycho's can't ruin a good reputation that easily!!

Unfortunately, depending on how the report is posted, you CAN google your name and find yourself. NBL in particular, the non-desecrate ASP can put your name out there. I know of someone that has lost his job and struggles to keep the family together because he posted a less than stellar review on a gal he had seen several times.

So, even with the most respected/well reviewed, keep your personal information to yourself!

Sorry ladies, 1 "cunt" can ruin it for the rest of you.

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Unfortunately, depending on how the report is posted, you CAN google your name and find yourself. NBL in particular, the non-desecrate ASP can put your name out there. I know of someone that has lost his job and struggles to keep the family together because he posted a less than stellar review on a gal he had seen several times.

So, even with the most respected/well reviewed, keep your personal information to yourself!

Sorry ladies, 1 "cunt" can ruin it for the rest of you.

I have to repeat what superbusty said in your quote that HIS actions probably resulted in the consequences and not her's alone. I'm not sure we have the whole story here or maybe I'm just pissed off at the name calling and use of the word "cunt ".

In my beginning, I found BL to be accurate and used it as one screening tool. A serial rapist was listed on the registry and he contacted me so I was thankful to know this information. I have used it for less serious reasons as well and was able to avoid time wasters and thieves. However, the management leaves a lot to be desired and their screening process is non existent or was at the time I used it. Different people's experiences with it have been discussed earlier on this board.

In addition, you will be giving up personal information depending on the screener including real name, real place of employment and possibly more so you just have to make the decision about whether you want to see someone who screens or someone who sees anyone.

Edited by lola
added
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I have to repeat what superbusty said in your quote that HIS actions probably resulted in the consequences and not hers alone. I'm not sure we have the whole story here or maybe I'm just pissed off at the name calling and use of the word "cunt ".

In my beginning, I found BL to be accurate and used it as one screening tool. A serial rapist was listed on the registry and he contacted me so I was thankful to know this information. I have used it for less serious reasons as well and was able to avoid time wasters and thieves. However, the management leaves a lot to be desired and their screening process is non existent or was at the time I used it. Different people's experiences with it have been discussed earlier on this board.

You are correct, his actions did result in the NBL listing. He alerted other to her declining service/attitude on subsequent visits.

She chose to "revenge" him by placing his name and board handle in the portion of NBL that is viewable by the public. Due to the nature of his work, his name is googled often and now the NBL post is on the front page.

Through conversations with others, she has done this a total of 4 times. Bad review? Life ruined.

I'm sorry you don't like the particular term I used to describe her, but it is the most appropriate for her.

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You are correct, his actions did result in the NBL listing. He alerted other to her declining service/attitude on subsequent visits.

She chose to "revenge" him by placing his name and board handle in the portion of NBL that is viewable by the public. Due to the nature of his work, his name is googled often and now the NBL post is on the front page.

Through conversations with others, she has done this a total of 4 times. Bad review? Life ruined.

I'm sorry you don't like the particular term I used to describe her, but it is the most appropriate for her.

No, I think his own actions had something to do with what happened to him.

You math doesn't add up.

Edited by boink36
Combine quote with post.
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No, I think his own actions had something to do with what happened to him.

You math doesn't add up.

She offered to remove the listing if he changed his review, blackmail? Of course NBL will not allow removal of posting.

And she has confided in other ASP's to doing this.

I'll have to respectfully disagree with you assessment of the situation. ;)

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With all due respect as well, we are getting only 3rd hand information. Crappy actions on her part if the sequence of activities unfolded this way. But he's not innocent. This is a risk we all take and I'm speaking as someone who also lost a job engaging in this hobby.

I'm saying that the equation isn't simply bad review=being outed. The equation should also include an element of inherent risks that are just there and which he assumed.

Sucks in this country the stigma that this hobby has. Heartening to see people working to change that.

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Lola, I'm not sure if Frankenthaler & I are thinking of the same local ASP, but I have heard from several sources about an ASP who would blacklist clients for less than FANTASTIC reviews. These sources knew the quality & typical behavior of these clients from personal experience and had heard her brag of her actions. It does happen!

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My saying "crappy actions on her part" acknowledges this. Has happened, is happening and will happen. I'm saying that he needs to take responsibility for his role in what happened to him too. For me, its not so cut and dried when engaging with people in a committed relationship. The risks are a totally different set which I sometimes decide not to assume.

If she's one in the same person, have those of you who rely on reviews warned each other about her by way of a review or pms?

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Bit,

No, the ASP I reference to was from the Midwest. Has sense moved to Vegas. So far she is not a member of this board. But does advertise on EB, is a p411 member and claims to be an "upscale, discreet" provider.

Yes you can list someone on a BL site. But you do it in a fashion that still keeps them safe in there private life.

If you maliciously post in a fashion that his personal information is out in the public and not "behind" a sign in, you are neither upscale or discreet. Especially if his only crime is to post a valid account of his time with you.

Of course, we all know that a PI would not have an ASP contact that could view this information behind the sign in screen and relay it to them. :rolleyes:

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<snip>

If she's one in the same person, have those of you who rely on reviews warned each other about her by way of a review or pms?

I've PM an individual from Vegas to keep an eye out for "request for information" post about her.

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Lola, I'm not sure if Frankenthaler & I are thinking of the same local ASP, but I have heard from several sources about an ASP who would blacklist clients for less than FANTASTIC reviews. These sources knew the quality & typical behavior of these clients from personal experience and had heard her brag of her actions. It does happen!

And "cunt" is the proper word for someone who ruins lives over something as trivial as a review.:D

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Pretty dumb of him to do something as public as posting a review if he had that much to lose in the first place not to mention the obvious risks. I stand by all of my statements.

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I totally agree with Destiny. I was blacklisted 4 years ago by a vindictive provider who was very territorial. What she wrote about me were out and out lies and some half truths taken out of context. In the 4 years hence, only one lady asked me about it, and she started out by saying " I'm sure this is not correct but..." Oh, if any of you are wondering how I found out exactly what she wrote, it took me about 2 hours to figure out how to access her account and I am a complete computer illiterate.

All of you that think any sites, not just including the hobby sites, are "safe", think again. So, please do not put anything on any site that is personal info or you would not want anyone else to find out about.

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I think the first thing that needs to be said is this is a dangerous hobby for both client and provider. Before one gets involved in this hobby you should decide if its the way you want to go and be aware of the risks that come with it. That being said....

I look at the blacklist for 2 things: LE and safety. 1st is pretty obvious, years ago I could have avoided being caught if I had looked on the blacklist sites as the cop who go me was on there as LE. 2nd is the safety concern. Now we all know a few bad apples will be vindictive or selfish or whatever and post false reports, however the professional providers do take into consideration how many reports, by how many providers and what the "crimes" were. Most reports are just timewaster or ncns'er. Those I book no problem knowing they might not show up. More serious crimes include, [ snip ] robbery, injury etc. Those I will read and will use my best judgement or maybe his references ok'd him and determine if I will see him. If its something simple like shorted a girl, I might ask for donatiom and count it first. But all reports are taken as Destiney said with a grain of salt.

As clients you can decide who you want to see based on your own way of screening. You also have the power to write reviews and decide if you want to continue to see her or not. If you stick with the good reviewed providers, talk with other hobbyiests here on good referrals, and do your homework then you won't need to worry about vindictive girls.

But you have to treat the providers right too. Cancel if you can't make it, pay donation in full and be respectful of her time and limitations you shouldn't have anything to worry about.

Kyla

Edited by boink36
Forbidden topic removed.
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Providers blacklist people for the same reason that someone doesnt like you because he happened to catch you looking at him funny - because they can. However I disagree with providers who blacklist people they haven't confirmed an appointment with unless they're rude or insulting. How harmful are pointless emails.

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I rarely (if ever) look at blacklists. Because the information is not really properly vetted, I have no idea whether it's genuine or some provider retaliating for something, or whatever.

Blacklists are only one tool in a vast screening arsenal. There are many ways to verify an individual without checking blacklists. I choose to screen in my own way, which seems more solid than the questionable info on blacklists.

Bottom line: a lot of providers don't use blacklists, and even if they do, they are VERY wary of the quality of information there.

xxxooo

Beverly ;-*

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