Search the Community

So, I put a FWB, NSA ad out on CL a few weeks ago. After filtering through the jiberrish@"x"mail.com responses, things got dead quiet. Who'd a thunk women aren't lining up for such things? Wait, here's one. Hi, "I'm Pseudonym I saw your post and I'm interested. I'm 24, 5'2", and athletic. I’m an experienced sugar baby, and I’m currently looking for a SD. I’ve attached a picture, it's pretty obscure but it's for safety/security reasons, at least until I know that you're not a complete psycho. Hope to hear from you soon." Xoxo. Damn she's gorgeous! Well, far as I can tell below her smoking hot collarbone. Make a young man wish for younger days but, is she real? Or is she Memorex! Who remembers that? Wait for it... "Hi Pseudonym, They call me Ile but you can call me daddy . Actually, it was, " Hi Pseudonym" (AKA woman of my wet dreams). "My name's Ile. Thanks for writing and the pic. Certainly like what I see. How do I go about proving I'm completely sane, safe and fun to be with and vice-versa?" Was that good, or what?! Yeah, well...no response. A few days later, " Hi Pseudonym. I'd like to know more about you. Still interested?" Days later, nada thing. What's a guy got to do around here to sneak and play!? Week goes by. Incoming email: "Hi, it's Pseudo'2. I am 40. not a BBW, not a supermodel...I like this, that and the other...we can get together sooner than later. Email or text me at 719-xxx-xxx". Pic of a nice looking Asian younger lady attached. Of course, I love Asian food. And Asian women, young and old(er) but, my favorite? Sum Yung Chik. Check BP for 719-xxx-xxxx, nothing. This is good, right? Googled 719-xxx-xxxx. NOTHING! Check TOB, nothing. This is...good'ish, right? Could be a low mileage, TOFFT opportunity, right TEAM?! This is looking more and more like that one you've been liquoring all night just before last call...better and better. Condensed text out: "Hey Pseudo2"...I love it when you call it big poppa ...What part of town?...Oh yeah? Let's meet for lunch at that such and such near there in an hour, see if we like each other. Ok. It's on! Heart's pumping like five-oh got behind your car fun. Not that I know what that's like. Backed into rear parking row about 10 mins before. Asian lady pulls in front parking row. Looks around, backs up right next to me...it's Pseudo2! Waiting to see if she would get out so I could see that ass. She's texting... Incoming from her: "What car are you in" (ugh) Me: "I'm right next to you (ugh), going inside now". Walking inside feeling all Jason Bourne she yells out her car,. "Hey!" I cringe/turn around, "are you Ile"? I could've crawled under the beverage delivery truck in front of me. "Yes", I said. She says, "Hi! I'm Pseudonym". Me: "Hi. I'll meet you inside." In comes this sexy, definitely older little Asian woman. Damn near booty shorts but, she's Asian so we're talking best case scenario here, knee length boots. Stockings above the knee held by garters. Great public appearance. No cleavage, tight blouse. Flowing black mane of hair for days, a perfect love handle. I offered anything on the menu, she orders cheap I'm all, "Winning!" We talk. Laugh. Explore possibilities. Are those real? Yes, but it's a padded bra. What's your incall like? An apartment? Nice. More what we like, don't like. Oh my. What a nice, full menu at reasonable price you have there, my sweet. With a prior commitment we part company, intending to go back. As she's getting in her car I ask for the address, expecting the worst. Oh, it's XYZ. I'll text it to you. Do a drive-by. Meh. Think I can handle it. Incoming: Address and breast pic. Very nice. How about that kitty, I asked? Purr, said the kitty back with a "Better in person" assurance. I bet, said Ile Haversnatch, thinking...sure will. Yes, feeling blue right about now and THEN had to reschedule. Yes, ugh. Stand by?